Chapter 45: Dean

45

DEAN

J amie’s breathing evens out quickly, and she sleeps peacefully. Her face is still too pale for my liking, but it’s better than it was.

When I step outside, Wyatt pushes in, the big male promising to stay by her side while I take care of some business. We shake hands, no words needed. He saw how scared I was when she was hurt. He saw me here, sick with worry every second she remained unconscious.

He knows I’ll be back. Before he shuts the door, he gives me a stiff salute and dips his head like you would to your alpha. In the last two days it’s like we’ve both accepted, without it needing to be said out loud, that he belongs to this pack now, both him and Jamie.

His mother is here, and his halfbrother. We deserve the chance to bond, and he deserves a home, and he’ll have that here. That is, if he doesn’t win one of his own.

The next round of the contest was pushed back following the ‘accident,’ and really, he should be resting. After a couple of days of keeping vigil, he looks as terrible as I do.

But just like me, there’s no talking to him. At least if he sits in the chair beside her and closes his eyes, he might nod off and get a couple hours of sleep.

DEAN: Where are they?

CALLUM: Almost at the bridge.

Stripping off my stale clothes at the front door, I shift and run to the border, where the two wolves who were fighting when Jamie was hurt are getting ready to leave.

Both freeze when they see my huge black wolf racing toward them, their scents turning bitter with fear. They back up against the railing, dropping their bags at their feet and raising their hands in front of them as I prowl forward, snarling and snapping. My wolf needs to make sure his anger is felt.

When they’re suitably terrified and sweating hard, I shift back, standing with arms folded in front of them.

They wait, afraid to speak, sensing my wolf’s thirst for revenge simmering just below the surface. He’s ready to inflict violence if they utter even one word that pisses me off.

“What do you know about the Anderson pack?” I ask, observing each man closely. It takes them a second to realise that they’re not going to get mauled, at least, not yet, and form a proper answer.

“Their alpha needs to retire due to ill health. His only daughter is incarcerated. He has no other living relatives to take over the pack.” An intelligent answer from the one who shifted back to his human form when I asked him to.

Lynn told me he stopped by my office and made multiple attempts to find me and apologise. He sent flowers for Jamie and brought some healing herbs for her to the hospital. Then he sought out Freddy to say sorry for scaring him.

Credit where credit is due, he seems to feel genuinely guilty about what happened even though he himself didn’t hurt Jamie.

“What about you?” I ask the other wolf, who can’t seem to look me in the eye. He’s the one who should really be sorry. It was his claws, his reckless shift, that hurt my mate and endangered a young child.

“They’re a split pack, with some members supporting the older alpha and his traditional ways. The rest want to continue with the plans his daughter had to gain more power in the region by any means necessary.”

Nodding, I look both men in the eyes. “Whoever goes in there as alpha will have to be excellent at conflict resolution to unify the pack.”

The two men look at each other and then the ground, immediately knowing where I’m going with this.

“I’m not sending you home because you hurt my mate. If I wanted retribution for that, believe me, you would be paying with blood, not your place in the competition.”

My wolf thinks that’s a fantastic idea and isn’t impressed that I haven’t let him tear them to shreds, to see how they like bleeding out into the dirt.

“I’m sending you home because you let whatever personal bullshit was going on between you impact your ability to think straight. The second I saw you shifting, you were already gone.”

Extending a hand to each man, and shaking hard, I narrow my eyes.

“I wanted you to understand that what happened to my luna didn’t impact my decision. You’re fucking lucky Jamie’s okay, or this would be a very different conversation.”

Looking relieved, the two men pick up their bags again before continuing across the bridge toward the car Blake sent to drive them home.

BLAKE STEEL: That was very magnanimous of you.

DEAN: They’re immature idiots. Not alpha material, but not bad guys. But if Jamie had died, you’d be plucking bits of them out of this river for the next month.

Blake emerges from the trees and nods, like that’s a perfectly reasonable statement. He has a mate. He gets it.

“So, she’s awake?” Blake joins me as I walk back toward the packhouse, grabbing a change of clothes from the stash we keep near the bridge for the border patrol.

“She is,” I state, trying to keep the excitement from my voice. “Wyatt’s with her now. She should be able to leave the clinic tonight if her healing keeps up.”

Her wounds knitted back together quickly after Maggie poured bag after bag of my blood into her body. I would have drained myself dry if that’s what it took to keep her alive. A chill runs down my spine as I remember those first few hours, the fear, the not knowing, as I lay curled up around her, just waiting to see if she’d pull through.

And then the relief, so great I wanted to sink to my knees and weep, when Maggie told me she was healing quickly and that, barring an infection, she was going to be okay.

I’ve never been as scared in my life. Not for myself when Dad was on a rampage, and not even for Maya when she was beaten black and blue, because as bad as that was, I never doubted we’d pull through.

This was different. The image of Jamie’s blood soaking into the earth in a wide arc around her small body will stay with me forever. If the only way I can make sure I never have to experience that again is to keep her permanently by my side, that’s what I’ll do.

It’s a quick walk, but the fresh air helps to clear my head and loosens some of the tension I’ve been carrying like a weight on my chest since I saw Jamie lying on the ground.

“You’re allowed to be happy, Dean. About Jamie being okay, and in life. You know that, right? Don’t deny yourself. Life is too short.”

With a supportive pat on the shoulder, he veers off, going in search of his own mate who arrived yesterday to join him for the rest of the games.

While I agree with his supportive words, I’m not really sure that I do know that.

Have I ever been happy? Do I even know how to be?

I stand and stare at the front of my packhouse, a fine building, but one that up to now, has held nothing but terrible memories for me.

Maybe it’s time I started replacing the nightmares that echo around this place with the dreams that up to now, I’ve been too afraid to allow myself to have.

Instead of going straight back to Jamie, I take a detour, knowing Wyatt will stay with her until I get back.