Chapter 28: Dean

28

DEAN

A m I out? Am I FUCKING out?!

That’s what she wants to know?

Jamie wakes up naked, in a strange house, badly injured after someone tries to kill her, and that’s her primary concern.

Her cum still coats my fingers, and she’s worried about the damned competition.

While my wolf admires her determination, the man in me despairs. I was so close to giving into temptation. If I’d parted her thighs, I could have slid inside and…

And what, Dean? Fuck her? Claim her? Walk her back to the pack with your seed still dripping down her thighs to introduce her to her mother?

The fact that now you know how she sounds, how she writhes when she comes, is bad enough. How are you going to stay away long enough to sort out this mess with Maggie now?

Struggling to keep both my temper and my libido under control, I slam the door shut behind me, watching her pad down the steps, long legs bare to the elements.

She still has no underwear on, stubbornly refusing to ask me for anything. Is that a me thing, or is it just that she’s so used to doing everything on her own? Neither answer sits well with me.

If I were a gentleman, I’d have helped her put on her clothes, but I couldn’t trust myself not to touch her. She fit so perfectly against me, and I slept soundly with her wrapped up in my arms… better than I can remember. And when she woke up, shivering with each clap of thunder, trying to be brave but pressing closer each time the thunder rattled the cabin, I got lost in the moment.

So lost that I took things too far.

She’s not mine, I remind myself.

What happens now?

Thank God she opened her mouth, and all illusions of this being something I can have went flying out the window.

Seeing her hurt almost broke me. She has no fucking clue how scared I was when she wouldn’t wake up. I can’t let someone have that much power over me, not when my pack needs me to be strong.

“Use the damn handrail, unless you want to add a broken neck to your list of injuries,” I bark, taking my frustrations out on the last person who should be in my firing line.

I’m a ball of nerves watching her walk down the slippery steps. She must still be exhausted. Her wolf has been working hard through the night, healing not only her cuts and bruises, but the side-effects of exposure.

An image of her clinging to the side of the ledge, shivering, slams into me, and I growl.

Samuel and Joel are going to pay for what they did to her.

Jamie glances over her shoulder and rolls her eyes, assuming the growl was directed at her.

Her glossy dark hair hangs down her slim back. The lengths are dull from the rain and overall, it’s a tangled mess. It looks like she’s had far more fun than she did. I should have let her shower before we left, even if she was driving me crazy. But then, an image of her naked under a spray of steaming water has me almost choking, and I shake my head.

No, that wouldn’t be a good idea either.

Marching back from my mother’s remote cabin in silence, I fixate on what she said about me being happy she’s leaving. I should be, but I’m reluctant to let her go. I’ve bought myself a few days, allowing her to stay and watch Wyatt, but my wolf wants more.

“Thank you,” Jamie mutters, waiting for me to catch up. “For fixing my arm.”

I can feel how much that hurt her to say.

“How’s your head?” I ask, brushing back her bangs to reveal the red line that was a deep gash just the night before.

Jamie stares at me for a second before stepping away and putting up her walls again.

“It’s a long walk. It’ll be even longer if you can’t even bring yourself to speak with me,” I point out.

She might be able to shift and run, but I don’t want her working that shoulder more than necessary. Her fingers find the bump, and she frowns. “Seems all better.”

I checked the wound on her head while she slept, and it closed nicely, but the swelling remains. The dark bruises covering her side and hip are already melting to a dull yellow hue. Other than her shoulder, she’ll be all healed by tomorrow.

“How did you know how to pop my shoulder back in?” Jamie slows the pace of her angry march, perhaps coming to the same conclusion that sniping at each other the entire way back isn’t going to be much fun. Our wolves want to stick close, there’s no point in fighting them too.

“When you have a father like mine, you become an expert in field medicine,” I explain darkly. I had to do it for Mum, and Maya had to do it for me. Not your average family bonding, but I’m good to have around in an emergency.

“Oh.” Jamie falls silent, her good arm cradling her sore one, as we follow the overgrown trail back to the main track that runs around the perimeter of the lake. “That’s tough. I’m sorry.”

Nodding, I press my lips together. My home life is not something I discuss with anyone outside my immediate family, and then, it’s only because they lived it too. They witnessed every humiliating beating, every stupid row, and finally, when I was big enough to do something about it, the retaliation. But nobody else wants to hear me whine.

“I’m sure being a rogue isn’t exactly a picnic either.”

I’m not sure whether I’m deflecting her attention away from me or trying to find out more about this little rogue, but from the way her body language changes, I can tell she’s equally uncomfortable speaking about herself.

Finally, she tilts her head to look at me, those penetrating golden brown eyes sharp.

“Our mother left when Wyatt and I were young. She was a single mum. When we were teens, our pack said we were no longer welcome. Apparently, we represented a threat to their safety because of who our mother had mated.”

My father.

When I don’t come clean, pretending to still be clueless about who her mother is, she presses her lips together in a thin line. Disappointed. Pissed off. But too clever to show her hand completely.

She shrugs, returning to our conversation like we’re both not dancing around the elephant in the room.

“It was just an excuse to get Wyatt out. Without Mum there, we had nobody to stick up for us. We didn’t do anything or steal anything.” She’s matter of fact, like this callous disregard for her and her brother was no big deal.

Guilt rolls over me. My father stole her mother away and left Wyatt and Jamie behind. And someone took advantage of that.

“I’m sure you’re right. Wyatt would be a threat to any alpha who doesn’t deserve his loyalty.”

My easy acceptance that it wasn’t something they did that resulted in them turning rogue, seems to surprise her, but one look at Jamie and you can tell she’s not a danger to anyone, except maybe herself.

“Do you miss pack life?” I ask, forcing myself to push through my own shame at how my family ruined her life.

“It’s been so long, I barely remember what pack life was like.”

Lie. I can smell her sadness at being excluded from what is an innate need for almost every wolf, to be part of the collective.

“Did you try to join another pack?” I ask, knowing full well it’ll be me offering her a spot, that is if I can get Maggie to see what she’s missing out on.

“Countless times. It just never worked out.” Jamie digs her teeth into her pillowy bottom lip as she blinks hard against the tears glistening in her eyes. “And how would my mother know where to find us? Joining another pack feels like admitting that she’s gone. Like, we’re giving up.”

Her words are like a knife to the gut. I have the power to take away her misery, but I have nothing if I don’t have my honour and integrity. As soon as we get back, I’m going to find Maggie and put an end to this charade.

Jamie and Wyatt have suffered enough.

When I don’t comment, she gives a sad shake of her head, and I’m floored by the power she has over me. That tiny display of disappointment is crushing. My wolf wants to do anything he can to bring back the smiling, sunny Jamie we’ve caught glimpses of before.

Anything but quiet and withdrawn.

I scramble for something to say to make her understand.

“I know nothing else but this pack. My father kept me trapped here until finally, I convinced him to let me go to Alpha training. Before that, I remember nothing but living like a prisoner.

I can see the cogs spinning in Jamie’s brain.

“Why did he send you to alpha training? It was only ever going to make you stronger and more of a threat.”

I shrug. It’s something I’ve gone over multiple times in my head.

“He knew his time was ending. I was standing up to him more and more. Maya was starting to realise just how much I’d shielded her from his rampages over the years. I think he knew if I was here, we’d eventually gang up on him. Getting me out from under his feet, even for a while, bought him more time.”

I was so relieved to go, hoping that without my wolf’s presence aggravating him that things would settle. I spent most of my time there petitioning other alphas to come to our assistance, but nobody would, too scared or too full of bitterness toward our pack to get past it.

“I should never have gone. It was selfish. I deluded myself into thinking it might make things better.” When I returned home and saw the carnage he’d wreaked in my absence, I regretted every second I’d spent away. It cost my family dearly. His reign could continue no more.

“You killed him,” Jamie whispers, not a question. There’s also no judgement. Lots of people, even though they know it was something that needed to be done, still can’t hide their distaste for what I was forced to do.

“I did.” There’s no hint of remorse in my tone. My only regret is not doing it sooner. “And that’s why I didn’t open the borders sooner. I needed time to fix some of the mess my father created. Much of the pack is scarred by what went on. I needed time to earn their trust.”

And to make sure no other alpha came charging in trying to take over.

To his credit, Blake watched from afar but never interfered, and I can’t thank him enough for that.

“And his mate?” Jamie stares off into the distance, blinking hard. She’s asking if her mother is dead. I know Maggie would want me to answer yes, or that’s what she thinks she wants now. But I can’t do that to Jamie.

“He attacked her while I was away. It was awful. That’s why I came home early from the academy. She…never really recovered from it.”

It’s true, but it’s an incomplete answer, and Jamie knows it.

“So, she died?” Jamie’s shrewd, and though she looks somewhat adorable swamped in my clothes, I underestimate her at my peril.

I say nothing, unable to either confirm or deny. Maggie suffered so badly at my father’s hands and did so much to protect us, even though we weren’t her blood. I owe her my loyalty, even if it’s killing me right now to hurt Jamie.

“Margaret, wasn’t it?” she asks, fearlessly making eye contact with me.

“Maggie,” I reply.

Jamie watches me closely, and I see a flash of something dangerous in her eyes when I still don’t address what we both know. That Maggie is her mother.

She knows I know. And she knows I’m all but lying to her face.

Her demeanour changes, and with a haughty flick of her hair, she marches on, remarkably superior for a woman wearing no panties. She stays that way, shut off from me, wrapped up in whatever thoughts are running through her head, the entire way back.

Even though she’s angry with me, I want her to like me. Or at least know that I’m a good man, trying to do his best. Right now, she thinks I’m the devil.

As we trudge up the hill, and the packhouse comes into view, Jamie starts to pick up the pace, pulling further away from me. Amused, I watch her stomp ahead, her body fuelled only by stubbornness and anger.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Twirling around to glare at me, she gestures to her outfit and dirty skin. “To get a shower and a change of clothes. Where else?”

Her jaw hangs open when I shake my head. “No. You’re not going back to your room. Not until Samuel’s been caught. I don’t have all day to babysit you, and my staff are run ragged as it is.”

I don’t want to be away from her, but that’s not the reason I’m doing this. I can’t have her running into Maggie before I speak to her. And I definitely won’t risk her being attacked again.

“I don’t need a babysitter,” she hisses, her one good hand clenching into a fist as I saunter closer.

“I think you’ll find that you do. Don’t forget, I caught you in the act once before, Jamie.”

Her cheeks flame at the memory of me catching her snooping, and I smile, enjoying her reaction. It’s pretty impressive how pissed off she looks drowning in my black T-shirt, her legs still covered in streaks of mud.

“I said you could stay on my territory, but you’re still out of the competition. You’re not staying with the others.”

She grits her teeth and glares at me. “Where am I going then?”

Tipping my head down a narrow path that cuts off into the woods, I motion for her to follow me. “You’re staying with me.”