Chapter 17: Jamie

17

JAMIE

T he atmosphere is electric as the competitors make their way to the starting line. My wolf is as giddy as a pup after its first shift. She loves being surrounded by so many other wolves after years looking on from the fringes. Feeling how much joy she gets simply from being here makes me sad that she’s been missing this connection so badly.

Wyatt insists on being here as early as possible, constantly pointing to the sky and throwing grass in the air, muttering about the weather. Reluctantly, I trail behind him, ignoring the stares I get as we walk along the well signposted path. Some are curious, some are suspicious. All are paying a little bit too much attention for my liking.

That damn dance. It put me right in everyone’s firing line, and as the only female competing in the first round, I was enough of a target already.

Everyone has decided I’m trying to sleep my way through to the next round, and so I’m the brunt of lots of crude jokes and leering glances.

I want to scream at them all that it was just a dance, just an act. But after the way Dean behaved in my room this morning, and how much I liked it, I don’t think that’s strictly true.

“Maybe if you turned off the resting bitch face, they wouldn’t stare at us so much. Or if you stopped throwing yourself at the alpha,” Wyatt teases, keeping his smile in place while I struggle to get out of the heavy mood that’s been weighing me down all morning. “I thought we were here to find out what he’s hiding. I doubt it’s under his bed.”

Closing my eyes, I bite back the urge to tell him where to go.

“I wasn’t flirting,” I hiss, pinching him hard on the arm to get him to keep his voice down. “It was just dancing. And if I keep the resting bitch face up, maybe they’ll stop trying to intimidate us and leave me the fuck alone.”

With a look of exasperation, Wyatt just shakes his head and faces forward. “Except, you don’t want to be alone. Your wolf wants to make some friends.”

He’s right, but he’ll never understand. It’s the same everywhere we go. Wyatt gets begrudging respect because of his sheer size, whereas I need to fight and scrap to be seen at all, while getting the brunt of the abuse they’re not brave enough to say to his face.

They’ll be thrilled when I don’t make the cut. I really don’t want to give them that satisfaction.

Again, my wolf rises inside me, determined to show what we can do. She’s stronger than they think. My mother was mated to an alpha, after all. The competition here is fierce, but my wolf is thrilled by the prospect of pitting herself against the best. At least half the field will get cut today. I don’t need to win; I only need to make sure I’m not going home.

That will give me more time to keep digging for answers. And more time with Dean.

I shove that thought away.

Around us, more wolves gather. Some are laughing and joking, others are in the zone, intense stares on their serious faces.

“Just dancing, eh?” Wyatt teases when he catches me going up on my toes trying to see above the sea of big, burly alphas for the only man my wolf pays any attention to.

My fist connects with Wyatt's shoulder just as the tall alpha appears from a side path and joins the procession toward the lake shore. He scans the area near the starting line, checking everything is in place. I wait for him to look my way, or acknowledge me at all, but he doesn’t, even though he knows I’m here. Instead, he focuses on Callum beside him, speaking in hushed tones, while his sharp gaze moves back and forth over the boisterous competitors, always watching.

I get a shove from behind, and Wyatt catches my elbow to stop me stumbling forward.

“Hey!” Callum shouts from his spot at the front, glaring hard at whoever laid their hands on me. “Do that again, and you can go home right now.”

Dean’s beta shows why he has his position as a blast of his dominance hits the wolves nearby. He’s not as easy-going as he appears to be.

“I’m fine,” I mutter, giving him a nod of thanks, repeating the same reassurances to Wyatt and tugging on his arm to stop him staring daggers over my shoulder. “I’m fine, Wyatt. Focus.”

When he finally faces the right way, I release him and let out a shaky breath. One crisis averted. When I lift my head, my eyes lock with Dean’s, and although he says nothing, lips pressed together in a thin line, I can feel the anger welling up inside him. He takes a half step forward, then stops, catching himself, and returns to his conversation with Callum.

As one group after another proceeds forward to the starting line, we get to move forward. When we come over the brow of the hill, the path falls away into a wide slope, running down to the banks of a crystal-clear lake, the water shining so blue in the sunlight, that it looks fake. The surface is completely still, adding to the stunning beauty of the view. Wyatt whistles in amazement.

Beyond the lake, we get a magnificent view of rolling peaks, all blanketed with dense, dark forests. The trees here are old and strong, the air humming with an ancient power and secrets. Deep gashes through the canopy in the distance hint at the streams and rivers that crisscross the territory, and my wolf itches to dig her paws into the dirt and explore.

I’ve never seen anything like it.

“No wonder they never let anyone come here before. I’d keep this view all to myself too,” I whisper. Every person that comes over the hill gasps and stops to stare in wonder at the view before them.

“Wow. Imagine having this on your doorstep. Being able to come here whenever you want.” Wyatt looks just as taken back as I am. We’ve travelled from shitty town to shitty town, working whatever jobs we could find and staying in the cheapest accommodation we could afford, or none when things were bad, or we inevitably got moved on by the local pack.

Rarely are we allowed to run free across their lands. My heart aches, longing pulling at my insides, at the idea of having a home like this. Something about this place calls to my soul. It just feels right to be here.

“Imagine this on a full moon.” I breathe in deeply, still captivated by the glistening water. Closing my eyes, I let the weak sun warm my face and sigh, content. Despite the bustling activity around us, my wolf is more relaxed than she’s ever been. She loves it here. It’s going to be tough to leave.

“You’ll get to see it for yourself if you make it through.” Dean’s voice at my back makes me jump.

I spin, hand on my heart.

He holds his hands up. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” He looks genuinely apologetic, so I nod and return my gaze to the breath-taking view.

Wyatt chuckles and nudges me with his shoulder. “It shouldn’t be that easy to sneak up on a future alpha, anyway.”

Well, fuck you. I roll my eyes at his terrible joke and at Dean, who smirks. Seeing them standing side by side, arms folded, there’s something similar about their poses. Stepbrothers, not related by blood, but raised, at least for a while, by the same woman. Maybe in time we’d see more shared mannerisms.

But for now, there’s something else I’m far more interested in.

“What do you mean, we’ll get to see it?” I ask, scarcely believing what he's offering. It sounds too good to be true.

Dean’s intense gaze washes over me, lingering a second too long to be casual on my exposed legs, the bare legs he ran his hands over this morning. I love that he likes what he sees, even if he’ll never openly admit it.

“Anyone who’s still here can run with us at the full moon.” He looks at me, puzzled, like that should be obvious, but Wyatt and I have never been allowed to join another pack’s full moon run, even if our presence on the outskirts of their community was tolerated.

“Are you serious?” Wyatt asks, barely able to contain his excitement. Dean nods and smiles confused but caught up in my brother’s enthusiastic response. Wyatt’s eyes go round, and he grins.

“Fuck yes. Jamie, you have to get through. For that alone.”

He doesn’t need to tell me that. It’s yet another compelling reason to make sure I get through this round. My wolf is doing cartwheels in my mind at the prospect of running with others in animal form. To her, he may as well have just offered her the moon. She’s officially done for.

“Do you have many people from other packs living here who join in?” I ask, unable to resist testing him out.

Eyes tightening slightly at the corners, he tilts his head to observe me. “No, Jamie. Our borders have been closed for years. There’s nobody from outside the pack here.”

Lie. I can scent it immediately, and I purse my lips against the bitter tang of it. Now isn’t the time to call him on his deceit, but soon.

Over my head, Dean and Wyatt exchange a look before my brother steps away, touching my arm lightly, and pointing to the starting line, where everyone is beginning to gather. The wolves around us have thinned out, and I should join them, but Dean clearly has something he wants to say.

“Good luck.” He clears his throat awkwardly. Is he nervous? My wolf swoons, happy that he’s made the effort to wish us well, that is, until he adds, “You’re going to need it.”

Dean stares straight ahead, and I can tell by his rigid posture, he’s all too aware of the lingering eyes on us.

“Gee thanks.”

My wolf’s not impressed with his lack of confidence in her abilities, and combined with the cold attitude toward me now, she’s pissed off. Her low growl has his eyes snapping to mine. I don’t look away. This guy is switching gears so often, it’s giving me whiplash.

“I get it. You don’t want me to be here, just like everyone else.” Sighing, I yank my hair up into a ponytail, done with Dean Reynolds and ready to get this competition started. “You don’t have to be a dick about it, and you don’t have to pretend to be nice either.”

Dean frowns at the bite to my words, his eyes sliding to mine, but I avert my gaze before he sees anything there that I don’t want him to.

“Jamie…”

I move to follow my brother down the hill, and to my surprise, Dean walks close by my side, a half step behind like some hulking bodyguard. With the looks I’m getting, I’m mildly grateful but also unbelievably frustrated. This man is giving some seriously mixed signals and seems incapable of telling the truth.

The silence between us feels like a living, breathing thing. I can feel him practically bursting to get something off his chest.

Our hands brush as I step over a large rock in the path. Snatching my hand away, I hiss at him quietly. “Don’t.”

Shaking my head in exasperation, I turn back to stare out at the postcard perfect view. I’m a rogue, he’s an alpha. That’s all I need to focus on. Not his delicious smell or strong hands.

“What do you want from me?” I ask, stopping to face him, hands on hips. “Other than for me to fail.”

“I want to know why you’re here, Jamie.”

Feeling like I’m under the microscope, I squirm. “To win a pack.”

Dean shakes his head and chuckles humourlessly, his dark hair falling forward as he pins me with those smoky grey eyes. “No, you’re not. Wyatt’s here to win. I can’t work out what you want.”

Bristling at the suggestion that I’m not taking this seriously; I bite my tongue. I don’t want to get in trouble before the race even begins. “I want a pack,” I say. “Wyatt can win, sure, but I can help him by staying in as long as I can. And I’m planning on giving it my all because my wolf needs this, and she deserves it. Being alone is hard for her.”

That’s the truth, ish .

Wyatt is far bigger and stronger than me, with brains and the perfect temperament to boot. Obviously, he stands a better chance, but if either one of us comes first, we both win. We’ll finally have somewhere to call home again.

While I’m here, I’m also trying to understand why my mother abandoned her two small children to shack up with a man who killed his first mate, and never looked back. That’s a conversation for another time.

Because right now, most of all, I want to pretend that I belong. To imagine what it would be like to be back in the fold again.

“Hmm,” is all Dean says to my heartfelt admission, but continues to watch me closely, studying me. He takes one last look at my racing outfit before snarling at a male who brushes up against me as he walks by. My wolf practically rolls over at his protectiveness. When his eyes land back on mine, darkening, I know he feels this attraction. And hates it as much as I do.

“These guys are going to test you today. Are you ready for it?” He’s gone from insulting me to a pep talk so fast, my head is spinning. It seems the petty taunts of the wolves surrounding us are bothering Dean more than me.

“I’m used to being universally disliked and ready for anything.”

My flippant answer doesn’t please him, and he clicks his tongue in annoyance. He wants me to heed his words, but this is just another day for me. Living as an alpha and being respected by all, or at the very least feared, he just doesn’t get it.

Lynn shouts out a two-minute warning, and the excited chatter among the crowd grows louder.

“Nobody out there is in this for anyone but themselves. Wyatt is the only person you can trust. Wyatt and your own gut. Ignore everybody else and stick together if you can.”

With that cheerful warning, Dean strides to the front of the gathering and lets out an ear-splitting whistle. With our sensitive hearing, it’s a noise we hate, and everyone shuts up immediately.

“If you don’t have it already, get your timing chip. Everyone races from here along the signposted path to the canyon. Believe me, you’ll know it when you see it. Cross the bridge, then back here. No shifting today.” He pauses, waiting for disappointed groans to stop. “Anyone over four hours on the course gets cut. No exceptions. I don’t care if you broke a leg, or your best buddy tied you to a tree. You’re competing for a pack here. Whatever happens is on you. Keep your wits about you, and your eye on the prize. Top fifty percent of whoever’s left gets through.”

A murmur ripples through the gathered crowd as the realisation that this is it sinks in.

“This is the Alpha Games, ladies and gentlemen. With the best prize there is to be won. There are no second chances, so make sure you leave it all out there.” With a dark chuckle, he looks out at the crowd, who stares back at him, fascinated by the brooding alpha who earned his pack by killing his own father.

“Good luck out there.”

The tension in the crowd ratchets up as everyone collects a timing chip and attaches it to their wrist. Adrenaline pumping through each shifter's veins, the group falls into focused silence, waving for the race to start, large sections of the participants divided into waves that will go off at different times.

There’s going to be a lot of wolves leaving today.

“These two should be the first to go,” someone spits out behind me as we move forward.

Wyatt gives my shoulder a supportive squeeze.

WYATT: Ignore them. Focus.

There are looks of disdain from some of the wolves in our group, but others are fine, concentrating on their own race rather than me and my brother.

I push their negative attitudes out of my mind. All I can do is my best and hope we’re here for another day.

Feeling someone’s attention on me, I turn and lock eyes with Dean. He’s probably worried we’re going to come back in under four hours, and he’ll be stuck with us longer than he wanted.

Shouldering me gently, Wyatt pulls my attention back to Lynn, who tightens my chip. Callum stands to the side, getting ready to let our group loose on the course. He’s watching me, a serious look on his face, but when Lynn joins him and whispers something in his ear, he gives me a small nod as I step up to the line. Resisting the urge to turn and look for Dean once more, I shake out my arms and bounce on my toes, knowing my speed is going to be my biggest asset today.

“Ready, set, go!”