Chapter 34

Thirty-Four

IZZY

I ’m surprised as shit to see Emery waiting for me outside the administrative office.

He’s propped against the wall, his muscular arms folded over his chest and an insouciant smirk gracing his handsome face.

When he catches me staring, he stalks forward in two long strides, eating up the distance between us.

I keep my face impassive, even as his smile broadens.

Are those…?

Does he have dimples?

“What?” I ask, deadpan.

“I thought I’d walk you to class.” His tongue pokes out to toy with his lip ring.

“No thanks.” I move to push past him, and surprisingly, he allows me to.

But he doesn’t let me get too far.

He doesn’t say anything as he walks beside me, but I can feel his eyes on me the entire time, burning a hole through the side of my head. A skittering sensation ripples up my spine, and it takes every ounce of self-control I possess to keep my gaze fixed straight ahead. I grind my jaw together.

“Why are you following me?” I manage to grit out.

“I’m just walking you to class, Iz. This isn’t a marriage proposal.” His voice is gentle—devoid of any snark or sarcasm.

I whirl around to face him, and he immediately lifts his hands in the air in a placating manner.

“What do you want, Emery?” I growl as anger scorches my veins.

But mixed with that hostility is something warmer. Something softer. Something I don’t want to look at too closely. It twists my heart into a tight knot.

The smile falls from Emery’s face—disappears as if it was never there to begin with. His eyes turn solemn, the verdant green almost resembling molten emeralds in the artificial lighting.

“Do you know what a…” He glances in both directions, ensuring the hallway is still empty, before lowering his voice. “Do you know what a mate means for a shifter?”

I purse my lips. “Obviously not because you haven’t told me.”

“It means that you complement me. Complement my pack brothers.” He takes a single step forward.

Heat emits from his body in a way that envelops me in warmth. I feel…safe.

I fucking hate that.

“You’re meant for us—” Emery continues, but I cut him off before he can finish.

“I’m not meant for anyone, Emery,” I snap. “I’m my own person.”

I thought he’d be frustrated or even angry at my outburst, but instead, he just appears sad, his lips pinching and the skin around his eyes turning tight.

“I’m saying this all wrong, aren’t I?” He forks his fingers through his tousled blond hair. “Maybe I shouldn’t say that you’re meant for us. Maybe I should say that we’re meant for you .”

My breath hitches, and a shiver steals up my spine. “I don’t want that either.”

“You’re staring at me with pity.” Emery cants his head to the side. “There’s no reason to pity me, Izzy. The mating bond doesn’t supersede free will or our own desires. I’ve heard stories of shifters rejecting their mates all the time.”

His words don’t fill me with the confidence I’m sure he was expecting. An uneasy feeling unfurls inside of me at the thought of any of these men rejecting me.

How hypocritical is that?

God, what is wrong with me?

“So you want to reject the bond?” I ask, trying to understand his point.

I keep my expression perfectly blank, not allowing him to see the turmoil percolating just beneath the surface.

“Fuck. No!” He throws his hands up in the air. “I’m shit at this type of thing. Ethan is better at explaining things than I am.”

He absently scratches at a spot on his wrist where his pack mark resides, the shade slightly darker than the rest of his fair skin. “What I’m saying is…the mate bond doesn’t mean we’re suddenly in love with you or anything like that. But it means that if we give each other a chance, we could be something fucking fantastic. And I want that, Izzy. I want to give us a chance. I know you’re furious at me—and rightly so. I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am. We should’ve told you the truth, but we were scared it would drive you away. Or that you’ll think we’re insane.”

He huffs out a humorless chuckle.

“I probably would’ve contacted the mental institution if you started spouting such nonsense,” I confess, my lips twitching upwards before I force them to straighten out. To become a solemn, straight line.

“Yeah. I wouldn’t have blamed you. This seems like the start of a fucked-up Wizard of Oz . Shifters, witches, and vampires, oh my.” He adopts a high-pitched country accent that’s so horribly bad I can’t help but laugh.

Damn him.

The noise only lasts a second—and I quickly get myself under control—but Emery’s eyes gleam as if he was just handed a present the day before Christmas. A wide smile splits his face in two. Almost immediately, it fades yet again.

“And I’m sorry about Grayson. I never should’ve done what I did without all the information first. I thought…” He blows out another breath, the sound rife with tension. “I thought he was going to hurt you, you know? I panicked.”

I haven’t really talked to Grayson since the confrontation with Hale and Gerry. I texted him a few times to tell him I’m staying with my foster parents, and all I got in return was a thumbs-up. A fucking thumbs-up.

I can’t help but wonder if he’s still upset about…everything. Does he regret sleeping with me? He’s certainly acting like it.

Maybe that’s why I’m being such a coward and refusing to see him in person.

“And there is nothing—absolutely nothing—going on with Desiree,” Emery insists, then he pauses. Winces. “Okay, that’s not entirely true?—”

“Are you kidding me right now?” I snap as hurt arrows through my chest.

“Just listen!” He grabs my arm before I can stomp away, his touch feather-soft against my skin, his fingers burning everywhere they touch. “We don’t think of Desiree like that. Most of us can’t stand her. But…”

“But?” I arch an eyebrow.

His shoulders deflate as if he’s carrying the weight of the world. “But—and the others are going to be so fucking pissed I’m telling you this—we’re supposed to mate with her.”

Shock practically plows me over. I feel lightheaded and weak at the knees. All I can do is gape at Emery, certain I misheard him. Pain whirls through me like a tornado.

I manage a choked, “What?”

“Something happened a while ago.” He hesitates. “It’s a story that I think Ethan needs to tell you. But anyway, something happened, and the four of us got into a lot of trouble. Desiree’s dad is an influential member of the community, so he offered us a deal. He would forgive us if we mated with his daughter.”

A cold chill seeps through my skin. It feels as if someone dumped a bucket of ice cubes down my shirt.

“Why?” I rasp out. “Doesn’t she have a mate of her own?”

“Not every shifter does,” Emery says, extending his wrist. He points to the mark that resembles a flame. “This is our pack mark. And this one? The tiny mark above it? This is our mating mark. All of us have the exact same mark on our skin, indicating that not only are we in the same pack, but we share the same mate. We got them when we reached puberty.” His expression falls. “But not every wolf receives a pack mark. If someone doesn’t receive one by their eighteenth birthday, they’re considered a lone wolf.”

“And Desiree…?”

He shakes his head sadly. “Never got one.”

“What does that mean, exactly?” My thoughts stray to Christian, the only other lone wolf I know.

Emery’s next words cease all coherent thoughts. “They usually go insane. Their wolf… It takes control. They can no longer maintain their human form. Most times, lone wolves are sent into the wilderness to live out the rest of their lives.”

Oh…

Oh god.

Insane.

Insane.

Christian.

I think of his tiny smile, the stubble on his chin, that dark, spiky hair. My heart feels as if it’s being shoved straight into a meat grinder.

And Desiree…

“And mating with Desiree will stop her from going insane?” I ask quietly, putting the pieces together.

But Emery surprises me by shaking his head. “No. As of now, there have been no known cases of a lone wolf regaining their humanity. But that doesn’t stop Desiree’s father from hoping.”

“And what will happen if you refuse? If you don’t go through with it?” Rocks tumble through my chest.

Emery’s expression turns hard and unyielding, his eyes hewn from stone. “If we don’t mate with Desiree, then Ethan will be locked away for a very, very long time.”