10. Macie

Chapter ten

Macie

" E veryone has lost their minds." With my shoulder against the wall, I peeked out the front window of the dining room. My brother Seth sat on the dining room table looking out the window with me.

"They're a bit…" He paused as he searched for the right word.

"Annoying?" I filled in. "Ridiculous? Outrageous? Excessive?"

He tossed an aging nerf football from one hand to the other. "I was going to say enthusiastic," he said.

That would be one way to say it.

My brother had short red hair, a neatly trimmed evening shadow of a beard, green eyes like our mom, and he was tall and muscular like our dad. A Prince Harry look-alike, most of my friends had asked me to set them up with him. Seth was a year younger than me, a junior-to-be, phenomenal at sports, and an awesome brother.

Outside, my parents laughed and talked with their best friends, the people we considered family. Not only were blood uncles Alexander, Jacob, and Tyler there, but my gaggle of nonblood aunts and uncles—Isaiah, Rachel, Beth, Ryan, West, Haley, Abby, and Logan. Thank God none of them brought their brood of children. While I loved my cousins, I abhorred the crowd we had now.

Isaiah had brought over the car he and Ariel rebuilt for me, and I had to admit, it was beautiful. A cute little custom, deep blue Volkswagen Bug. Just my size. Just my style. Perfect for me. Isaiah was truly the best, and the guilt of lying about driving—being able to—was killing me.

"Everyone's excited to see the car," Seth said. "Plus, Mom invited them over for chili." Ah, yes, the scent had filled the house since I woke this morning.

But it was a million degrees outside, and nobody wanted chili. "Everyone's here to see me drive."

"I was lying to make you feel better. They're totally here to see you drive. It's as if you're a toddler and they want to see you take your first steps."

"Do you ever wonder what it's like to belong to a normal family?"

"Nope. I love having fifteen adults in my business all the time."

My lips edged up with his sarcasm, and when I glanced over at him, he gave me his wide grin, but then his smile fell. "You okay?"

No, not at all, but I didn't want to drag Seth into my mess. "Yep."

"That did not sound even slightly convincing," Seth commented. "You might want to rehearse that more before you go outside."

"Thanks for the advice."

"Anytime." Seth jumped off the table and lightly yanked a strand of my hair. "Have fun with the sideshow."

"You could try to distract them as I drive away."

"I could set myself on fire and no one's going to take their eyes off you. Have fun on your first day of work." Seth left the dining room.

"Have fun answering the eight million questions from everyone regarding whether you think I'm okay after I leave," I called out after him, and the nerf football came flying toward my head. I had to duck to dodge it.

"You missed," I needled him.

"I missed on purpose," he yelled back as he went up the stairs.

"Liar." But I believed him. Seth was so awesome at sports, everyone called him Hawkeye because he hit whatever target he wanted at any time.

My cell vibrated and, expecting it to be Relic, I immediately checked it then didn't know how I felt seeing Gianna's name. We had texted back and forth a few times, but it felt super strained. Hey, do you have a few minutes to chat?

Ugh. No, but at the same time, if I didn't talk to her, I'd spend the rest of the day wondering what she had to say. Me: Sure.

My cell rang a second later. I sighed heavily before I answered it with a happy, "Hey."

"Hey, girl! How are you?" Gianna sounded all sorts of cheerful.

Awful. "Good, but I'm leaving for work in a few minutes." Actually, group therapy, but I hadn't told anyone but Ariel about group therapy yet. "What's up?"

"I had no idea Relic was the one who drove us to your house!" she gushed. "In fact, I had no idea that you had gone out back at the party to hang out with him, and I heard you hung out with him alone. Girl, you are holding out on me."

I lightly tapped my head against the wall over and over again. "It wasn't a big deal."

"Not a big deal? You're hooking up with Relic Aslanov, and you don't think that's a big deal? Every girl at school wants to hook up with Relic. How on earth did you score him? You've been hiding for months, so how is it even possible?"

"Woah," I rushed out. "I am not hooking up with Relic."

"Relic hardly ever comes to parties, and if he does it's to hook up with a girl. Everyone knows that."

"So, because he came to the party and talked to me, I immediately dropped my panties for him. Is that what you're saying?"

"It's not a big deal," Gianna said. "In fact, everyone thinks its super cool that you showed up to get it on with Relic."

I rubbed my forehead and just plain had no idea what to say.

"Look," Gianna continued, "the reason I'm calling is because me and the girls from the volleyball team were talking, and you've gone through a lot, and while we all think it's great that you lived a little with Relic, we realized that he might be your first. Because of that, we want to make sure you don't get emotional and fall for Relic because he isn't the type of guy you want to fall for. He doesn't do relationships. He'll do a one-night stand every once in a while, but nothing else."

"Okay," I said absently as my stomach fell fast to the floor. My brain struggled to process all that she was saying, what it meant for me, and the worst part, how all of the people who I thought were my friends were talking about me behind my back.

"You sound upset," and Gianna sounded concerned…hurt…guilty.

"I'm not." But I was.

"Look, I'm super sorry how trashed I got that night. It wasn't cool of me."

It wasn't.

"And it was awesome how you convinced your parents not to call my parents."

"Uh-huh."

"And our parents might see each other at the volleyball fundraiser breakfast next week. I don't need to worry about them telling them then, right?"

Wow. My entire world was crumbling. Besides Ariel, did I have any friends anymore?

"I mean, I love you," Gianna said, "and you're one of my best friends, and I want to make sure we're okay."

Were we okay?

"Me and the girls from volleyball are going to meet up soon, and we want to make it about you. You know, just us girls. My house, pizza, movies. Like old times."

My mind raced with the constant whiplash. "I don't know. I just returned to work, and I don't know my schedule yet."

"Well, as soon as you do, let me know."

My cell vibrated with a text from Relic: Here . "Here" being off a side street near the entrance of my neighborhood where there were still empty lots for sale. Guilt nibbled at me for forcing him to walk to my neighborhood, but he said that a half mile wasn't a big deal for him. At the same time, I felt massive relief because now I could end this idiotic conversation. "I have to go. My ride for work is here."

"Okay. I love you and let me know your schedule. We'll plan the get-together for a day you can come. Everyone wants to know what it's like to kiss Relic!"

I wasn't sure if I said goodbye when I hung up or if it was more like a grunt. Now, I had to drive. My stomach twisted and I breathed through the dry heave. I officially hated my life more than I had before and, until now, I'd had no idea that was possible.

***

Two blocks. That's how far I made it before the little black dots in my vision solidified into one large black dot and I could no longer see. I pulled over, texted Relic, and he found me sweating, shaking, and hyperventilating sitting on the curb alongside several lots for sale in the new portion of our neighborhood. Thank God, I made it this far so I didn't have nosey neighbors tattling to my parents.

To his credit, Relic didn't say anything. Just held out his hand, palm up, and I gave him the keys. He opened the passenger door for me, I stumbled into the seat, and he eased into the driver's side, started the car, and drove off as if doing so was a piece of cake.

After a mile, when I could inhale without doing two short, ragged breaths with one longer one, I said, "Everyone at school thinks I hooked up with you."

Relic glanced over at me, but then returned his eyes to the road. "At the party?"

"Yes."

"It's not possible. We weren't alone long enough. If we had sex, I'd take my time."

I choked, and Relic's mouth tipped up. "I'm kidding." A beat. "I'm actually not. If given the opportunity, I'd spend all night worshipping your body."

I sputtered something not intelligible as my face burned with heat. I had never been kissed never mind had anyone talk about worshipping my body. But now that he had said the words, I had images in my head of me and him and his shirt off and his body over mine and a liquid heat rushed through my body.

"Point is, fuck what anybody says."

Flustered by the images still floating in my brain, I stayed silent and tried to remember why I was upset to begin with.

"That's not the reason you had a panic attack, is it?" Relic asked like the idea of me hurting over something involving him ticked him off.

Ah, yes, my panic attack. That was a thing that happened before Relic casually mentioned wanting to have sex with me. "No, I'm a wreck because I drove two blocks. Aren't I the queen of hot messes?"

He lazily slumped in the driver's seat and held the steering wheel with one hand as if he were the captain of a cruise liner comfortable at sea. "We go to therapy with a person who believes yetis are real and that the Russians are hiding them. I'm sure we haven't even begun to dig into everyone else's demons. Whatever category you're trying to push yourself into, there's many of us in therapy who share the title."

I cracked a grin because…Lev. I couldn't figure him out. "I think Lev's messing with us."

"I don't. I think he's giving us a small window into his brain. But watch, someday, we'll find out he's been right about everything this entire time, and then won't we look like fools?"

"He could be right about yetis?"

"Why the fuck not?" I loved the mischievous glint in his eyes.

"And that kiwis have feelings?"

"He could be on to something."

"And that we have alien guardian angels who visit us when we sleep?"

"Someone had to build the pyramids. You think humans were smart enough to pull that off?"

I laughed, he flashed me his pirate smile, and suddenly I didn't feel so bad anymore.