CHAPTER 16

Nitiel kept glancing at Loe as they walked side by side along the busy corridors of the space station. He wanted to make sure she was not overwhelmed by the big number of extraterrestrials, almost all of them male.

To his relief, both her body language and facial expression said she was in awe with what she saw. Not that he would have minded her clutching his arm to her chest, like she'd done on the previous planetary rotation. Or snuggling under his wing.

Nitiel cleared his throat. He should not allow his mind to drift back to the forbidden pleasure that his rest with Loe had been.

Though he had spent that rest as hard as steel, Nitiel didn't regret his decision to remain in bed after discovering the partition had malfunctioned. He had thus tested his restraint and discovered he was capable of keeping his more primal side – his father's side – leashed around Loe. That made him calmer now about staying close to her until the end of his mission.

Also, he had enjoyed hours of having Loe under his wings. Inappropriate, yes, but his attempts to do the right thing had led to nothing but frustration as one mishap after another had made sure he would be in compromising situations with the Commander's niela. Why not enjoy those inevitable situations? Why not pull Loe fully on top of him during the night so she would be more comfortable? Why not place his hands on her lower back and hip to keep her from sliding off in her sleep? Why not offer her to stay with him in bed a bit longer to get a sleepy smile out of her?

Nitiel cast another look at Loe to his left. Her lips were once again curled into a smile.

"What is it, my lady?" He had forgone the formal address in his cabin, but in public he had to stick to it, as empty as it sounded after the intimacy he and Loe had shared. "Is it everyone's curious looks your way that amuse you?"

"No, being curious is understandable when so few women live on this station. Everyone is actually doing a good job at not openly staring… It's us that I find funny."

"Us?"

"Well, yeah." She nodded slightly at the soldiers passing them by, an amused sparkle in her eyes. "The others are in working jumpsuits or one-piece uniforms similar to yours, going about their workday in space. I, on the other hand," she poked her fluffy skirts, "am in a Cinderella dress being forearm-led by you as though we're at a palace ball. We're so out of place."

Nitiel smiled. "That's because humans consider our social behavior outdated, when to us it's a tradition that does not change regardless of how our lives in space do. We may travel the stars, but tradition keeps us grounded so that we do not lose our way."

"Well said, Subcommander." Then she giggled. "Careful with those wing feathers, I'm ticklish."

"Forgive me." Nitiel pulled his left wing away from Loe, alarmed. He hadn't realized he was shielding her from behind with it, acting both protective and possessive in public. His self-control might not be as good as he had thought.

Silence fell between them as they kept moving across the station's top ring. She didn't seem interested in what lay behind the black metal doors along the right wall. Instead, her gaze alternated between the personnel passing by and the view from the long illuminators along the left wall. A tiny section of Jupiter was now visible from the corridor.

"So," Loe broke the silence first, "tell me more about the station. You said the Arboretum is in the center of the top ring, accessible only from certain sections of its middle level. But how many more levels and rings are there? I'm not sure how many I saw on our flight here."

Nitiel relaxed. That, he could talk about easily. "There are six levels on this ring, and we're now on level five. There are two more rings, much smaller than this one so they have fewer levels. The middle ring is where the maintenance personnel live and work, and the bottom ring holds additional battle stations and fighter ships. Each ring can function independently in case of an emergency."

"And the males we see here?"

"Soldiers as well as civilians, such as scientists, doctors, and botanists, among others. Everyone has a job to do, otherwise they would be back on Gaenthia or somewhere else in the galaxy."

"And the women? The nie-l-as?"

Nitiel smiled inwardly at Loe's attempt to speak his language. Her pronunciation was choppy, but it was her effort that mattered. With their language implants, Gaenthians could understand and speak any Terran language, and the same device was provided to Terrans who wished to use the Gaenthian language. That meant Terrans didn't need, and rarely tried, to learn Gaenthian. Yet another thing that made Loe stand out.

"Nielas are free to choose whether to work or not. As far as I know, the majority prefer to focus on relaxation or motherhood."

"Oh. Right. You guys want lots of babies."

Nitiel's brow furrowed. Why had Loe's tone turned flat? "Yes, offspring are very important for Gaenthia's future. Before we found compatible species to help with our dwindling female numbers, newborn Gaenthians were only in the hundreds."

"Yes, I know the story. I'm sorry about that. I understand where you're coming from."

"But?"

Loe laughed nervously. "I'm like an open book to you, aren't I?... Well, I'm not ready to become a mother yet. Not sure when I will be. It's my work that I want to focus on now. Developing my own business and stuff."

"Hm." There it was again, her mentioning her business. Her file said she was an accountant, but there clearly was more to it than that. He was about to ask, when he saw an elevator they could use.

"Please, step in here, Lady Loe." He guided her with a wing toward the wall panel behind which the elevator lay. A press of his pinkie revealed the small spherical space, and he led her inside.

"Whoa, it's tight in here," she mumbled as she stood facing him, his wings on either side of her.

His thought exactly. He might not have thought this over. But there was no backing out now. "It's a short ride two levels down, so I thought we'd use this individual elevator instead of walking all the way to the group one. You're small enough to fit inside with me."

One of her eyebrows shot up. "Why, Subcommander, for a moment there I thought you wanted to take advantage."

The launch command got stuck in his throat. His wings fluttered. Had he subconsciously chosen this elevator over the bigger one further down the corridor just so he could be two feathers away from Loe?

"We're going to level 3," he declared, gaze on the closing elevator door.

"Um, okay. That still doesn't answer my question."

"What is it?" He chanced a look down at her charming face. Loe was smiling knowingly. She was so close he could feel her warm breath on his chest. Goddess, what had he been thinking, bringing her inside this elevator?

"Do you disapprove of my decision to postpone becoming a mother?"

Ah, that. He finally got the elevator moving, then replied, "It is up to you and your niel to decide, Loe. My opinion is of no importance."

"But I would like to hear it. Please."

Nitiel sighed. This was a sensitive topic for him, but he could deny Loe nothing. "I haven't put much thought into becoming a father. As a clan-less male, I have no right to use the ASI's help in locating my fated mate. That puts my chances of finding her at close to zero. And creating offspring with a female that isn"t my fated mate is very difficult for a Gaenthian, unless medical assistance is used.

"Such services are quite expensive and, honestly, going beyond my comfort zone. It feels too much like going against the Goddess' will. I would do it if my female asked it of me, but I do not have one and probably never will, so… That is my opinion."

"Nitiel, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you." Her small hand rested on his chest. "Forgive me, I shouldn't have pushed."

Acting on instinct, he put his hand over hers. "You did not upset me. I have accepted the facts long ago."

She shook her head. "I don't believe you being destined to be alone is a fact. No way."

"You flatter me, but–"

"That's not flattery, it's what I believe. Once on Earth, you will be so high in demand you might wish for the quiet times without women chasing you."

"I don't want females chasing me," he said without hesitation, surprising both himself and Loe.

"Why? Have you… set your sight on… one particular woman?" Her eyes bore into his, as if she could read the answer in there.

Goddess almighty.What if Loe could? But even if she couldn't, he was not capable of lying. Not to her, not to anyone. Not even to himself at this moment.

His hand moved at its own volition to cup the side of her neck, his thumb tracing her delicate jawline. "Yes, Loe. I have eyes for only one female."

"Who?" The question was like a puff of air coming from between her parted lips. A puff of air that he felt against his lips, for he had leaned down, her mouth now but a feather away from his own–

Level 3.

The automated voice in the elevator returned Nitiel to reality with the subtlety of a wing hitting his face in battle. And good thing it did, because a moment later the door slid open to the busy corridor of the top ring's Level 3.

He moved away from Loe so fast that the backs of his wings hit the curved elevator wall.

"Nitiel! Are you alright–"

"This way, Lady Loe."

Her face fell, but she moved out of the elevator and to the left, as he had motioned for her to do.

Nitiel felt like tearing his horn nubs out for saddening her. Then again, it was for the better. What would have come out of his full confession?

For a moment there in the enclosed space, wrapped in Loe's heady scent and mesmerizing gaze, he had gotten lost in the dream of a relationship with her. But this was not a female he could declare his interest in and ask for a chance to woo.

Loe was Siriniel's! However interested in Nitiel she might look now, the second she met her niel, there would be no other male for her in the future. She wouldn't even remember the males she had been close to in the past. A polite nod in greeting was all Nitiel could hope to get from Loe if they ever met again afterward.

He could enjoy her company in the present, cherish the touches and warm looks she bestowed upon him, but nothing more. No tucking her under his wing, no snuggling, no tasting her inviting lips, nothing!

"The Arboretum's main entrance is just around the turn of this corridor," he told the quiet Terran walking beside him, unable to stand his own thoughts any longer. The silence between them was just as unbearable. "There are three more entrances, but those are further away. The garden is vast, it would take a day to walk to the opposite end."

"Wow."

"Indeed. This garden will ensure you do not miss the green spaces on Terra."

"Perhaps, if I were staying. But I'll be back to my good old neighborhood park in a few days."

"Lady Loe…"

"I know, it could be more than a few days, given how Commander Twirly Horn is having cold feet. But I'll be on my way home immediately after our meeting."

Nitiel clenched his jaw. She was saying this just to torment him. He should not get into the argument she was seeking. And yet, it was tempting. "I beg to differ, my lady. After said meeting, you will not wish to leave the cabin of Commander Siriniel of the Swirling Horn Clan, let alone the space station."

"It is you who will not wish to leave the station, my lord."

He stopped in front of the Arboretum's entrance, the huge transparent gate awaiting the scan of his pinkie, and faced Loe. "And why is that, my lady?"

She crossed her arms over her chest. "Because you will be afraid to go to Earth, where I will be waiting for you–"

"You will be waiting for me?"

"–to talk your feathers off for having wasted my time! Coming here was a mistake."

"Loe–"

The gate swished open, startling them both. A boy rushed out, half running and half flying.

"Good day, Subcommander! My lady!" the little Gaenthian shouted over his shoulder but did not slow down. Were his wings strong enough at this age, he would be entirely flying, no doubt.

"Watch it, Biriniel J!" Nitiel shouted after Biriniel's son. With only a handful of teens on the station, Nitiel knew all of them despite having spent a limited time here. This one, in particular, kept getting into trouble.

"Who was that?" Loe asked, looking in the direction in which the kid had disappeared around the corner.

"A future warrior. If he learns to stick to the proper discipline."

"He will be a soldier? But he looked like a… fledgling!"

Nitiel found himself smiling. "Biriniel Junior is far from ready to fight. It will be at least a year until his wings are strong enough to be subjected to the warrior tournament."

"Oh?"

Nitiel's smile broadened: he had piqued her interest, her desire to argue forgotten. "We do not allow our offspring onto the battlefield without testing their might first. Tournaments are held several times during the solar year. Until then, the boys train wherever their parents see fit. Biriniel of the Downward Horn Clan chose this station as his son's training ground. The Arboretum offers good flight training opportunities both with your own wings and on the back of a cibiri. Come, let me show you."

Loe followed him inside the garden with eyes wide open. He smirked at her slack-jawed expression upon taking the Arboretum in.

"This place… The sheer size… The trees… The colors… Awesome!"

Nitiel grinned. He had gotten the shine back in Loe's eyes, and without doing anything but bringing her to a garden.

He tried to imagine how this place would look like to a Terran. Trees with pale-blue trunks so broad three Gaenthians holding hands could not encircle them. Pink-colored canopies so high one had to crane their neck to see where they were almost touching the transparent domed ceiling. Flowering shrubs in vibrant colors attracting the birds and butterflies that scientists had carefully selected from various planets to build a unique ecosystem right here, in space. There was no one in sight, so the place was like a wild forest under the natural light of Jupiter.

Loe's eyes followed the mating dance of two butterflies over a bed of fluorescent-green flowers. Then she observed the chuncachoo perched on a tree and singing its mating song; the bright-yellow bird half Loe's size was a sight to behold. "My God, Nitiel… I love this place!"

He chuckled. "I can tell. Come, let us take a walk. The main path will take us straight to the cibiris' enclosure. I think you will like them as well."

"Those are riding animals, right?" she asked as she took his offered hand. He hadn't planned to touch her again, but the path was uneven and her Terran shoes looked too flat for comfort.

"We ride the cibiris, yes. But unlike the creatures your kind ride to war, like horses, camels, and elephants, our cibiris take us to the air."

"They're like Pegasus, then! I can't wait to see them. They won't try to eat me, will they?"

Nitiel chuckled once more. "Do not worry, the cibiris are herbivores and they're well-trained. The younger ones are wilder, but that's why they are held in a special enclosure, not roaming freely like the adults."

"Oh, good. Because I've had enough contact with dangerous animals on this station."

"No, no more dangers for you, Loe." Just the danger that his desire posed. But Nitiel would not let it get the better of him ever again.