Chapter 8

"Where are you going?" Beau challenges me.

"I can't fucking breathe around her."

Beau's eyes fall in sync with his shoulders. He stares at the cobblestone sidewalk. "Why did you invite us? I thought we were past this."

Our pasts are complicated. Beau and I have worked hard at getting back to being the brothers we were before. I walk in a circle with my hands over my face until I finally stare at him. "I'm not talking about Vanessa."

"Tessa? Damn, even their names are similar." With a slight shake of his head, he rubs the scruff on his jaw.

"It's not what you think."

"Then tell me, brother. What am I thinking?"

"You think I'm still hung up on Vanessa, and I'm not. I'm not supposed to fall for Tessa. I can't fall for her, but I can't catch my breath in her presence. She twists my insides, and it…"

"Reminds you of high school when you couldn't tell any of us that you were in love with Vanessa."

"Beau, that wasn't love. Love doesn't make you do the things I did. I was obsessed with you having what I wanted. That's not love, but the feelings are similar, and I can't be intimate with Tessa."

"I'm confused. You introduced her as your girlfriend. What do you mean you can't fall for her? You invited us here to meet her. We thought she was the one."

"That's the problem. She may be the one, but there's so much I need to tell you. Ask you. But I don't want to place you or your family in danger." I lean back and look at the stars glowing in the clear, night sky, the same way Tessa's eyes do. "You know when I told you the Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms government agency didn't hire me?" He moves his head in agreement. "I lied. The ATF did hire me and had me start the Lost Souls as an undercover operation."

His eyes widen as he stuffs his hands in his jeans. "You started the MC five years ago. The ATF must be playing the long game… fuck. What can I do to help?"

"Tessa's dad is the owner of all the Hatton dealerships and the president of the Steel Riders. I had to establish the club, do a few morally grey things, and bide my time until Hatton needed more manpower." I exhale a deep breath. "Anyway, we had a meeting. He wants me to facilitate the transportation of his guns from various countries. He realized we were brothers and offered me a chance to help him. Which is the break the ATF has been banking on."

His mouth opens, and he nods in understanding. "Barron's 69 Special Reserve stops at some of the ports you need."

"Yep."

My brother mulls it over in his mind. We think alike so I know what he's going to ask before the words fall from his mouth.

"What's that have to do with Tessa and not being able to breathe?"

"Her father needs a reason to be seen with me, so he arranged the marriage to Tessa. What better reason is there to be seen with me if I'm marrying his daughter? Tessa can't just marry anyone… has to be someone who could seem to have connections to upstanding citizens." I roll my eyes, unable to hide my frustration.

"Her father picked you because of me." His words tinged with worry.

Staring at my brother never affected me when I was young, but the older we get, his penetrating gaze unnerves me sometimes. I wonder if other people feel the same way.

"In part. I'm sorry. I had no idea you would be pulled into this. The ATF can provide confirmation and answer any questions."

"Fuck that, Beck. It wasn't that long ago that you saved Vanessa's life. I owe you." Beau squeezes my shoulder. "I love you. I knew something was off the last five years, pretending to be a badass MC guy. I always knew you were one of the good guys. I'll make whatever happen that needs to as long as Vanessa and the distillery have protection from prosecution."

I shake my head. "Not a problem. Now to my other problem."

"Tessa?"

"Yep. Her dad expressly forbade me from any physical contact, so it can be annulled later."

"No sex?"

"I didn't think it would be a problem. But she's… God, I sound stupid. She's over a decade younger than me. Prior to the meeting with Mr. Hatton, I met Tessa at a bar in Fancy Falls and ever since, she's been lingering in my thoughts. Once her father offered her to me like a piece of property and showed me a picture of her, I realized it was the girl from the bar. It seemed like a way to pursue a connection with her and fulfill my undercover assignment simultaneously."

"Be careful. She may be into you now, but when she finds out you're working to put her dad away for life, her loyalties may lie with her family."

Nodding in agreement, I say, "I know. I'll just have to keep her at arm's length, but Christ, it's hard when she's so sexy and rubbing against me."

My phone rings in my pocket, and when I pull it out, Good Girl is displayed on my screen. A smile pulls at my lips, and I'm staring at the phone with a grin that stretches as far as Route 66.

"You're fucked. Beck, you're in a no-win situation with her. You can't do your job and get the girl in the end."

I tap accept and place her on speakerphone so Beau can hear too. "Hey, Beau and I are outside talking. Everything okay?"

"Vanessa and I drank three m… more and shots." Tessa slurs her words.

"On our way back in."

"Double?"

"Yeah?"

"I need you."

If she only knew how those three simple words affect me.

Beau shakes his head with a smirk on his face as we stride through the crowd. We find our ladies on stage with the band. "Shots of Barron's 12 for everyone on me," Vanessa stutters into the microphone. Tessa throws her hands up in victory, and the crowd roars. Three waiters bring trays of shots onto the dance floor and pass them out.

After shots are taken, we reach for their hands to help them off the stage, and I ask Beau, "Can we stay the night at one of the cabins on your property?"

"Absolutely. I don't want you driving back to Fancy Falls or E-town. The girls may be sick. We're actually staying in the Bridal House tonight since Jessie's babysitting. You can stay in the Bachelor Cabin."

Jessie is a friend of ours from school that married one of our friend's older brother's Maverick.

"Thanks, brother."

I wrap my arms around Tessa as we make our way back to my SUV. She leans on me, her body limp and unable to hold herself upright. Enjoying the feeling of her body fitting perfectly against mine, I take a slight breath of the humid air and eventually, I lift her and carry her on my back. "Hold on."

Her legs wrap around my waist and her arms around my neck. Yep, this is much easier. I open the door, slide her into the seat, and click her seatbelt in place.

Beau and Vanessa's property is a few minutes from town, then ten minutes to the cozy cabins they rent out for weddings and other special events. When we turn on the road to the Bachelor's Cabin, she repositions herself and lays her head on my shoulder.

Maybe she's meant to be mine.

Why else would we be thrown together? Two opposite people who have nothing in common except that I bought a motorcycle from her dad a couple of years ago. I carry her to the cabin while she's sound asleep. I punch in the code, unlocking the front door.

I've stayed here once before for the twin's birthday last year. It was a two-day event since both sides of their family were in attendance.

When we get to the bedroom, I attempt to wake her. "Tessa, take off your dress, and I'll get something for you to wear." It would be impossible for me to undress her and not touch that curvy body. Beau said Vanessa keeps some clothes in the laundry room cabinets. I hurry back down and locate a t-shirt.

When I come back, Tessa's in her bra and a fucking thong. God help me.

I slip her arms through the holes and then pull it over her head. It's well-worn, and Tessa's nipples pebble through the thin cotton. Touching her in this state would be so wrong, but it doesn't mean I can't think about it.

Downstairs, I grab two glasses of water and search the cabinets for painkillers.

"Tessa, drink this water." She groans, and I scoot on the bed and sit her up against my body. I put the glass to her lips. "Drink."

She sips it and purrs. Beau's right, I'm fucked no matter what I do.

"Double?"

"My girlfriend should call me by name."

"Beckett, why won't you kiss me? I know you want to."

She's right—I do. My fingers graze her cheek. "You know why. I promised your father."

Kissing her would ruin me. Having never felt the undercurrent that runs between us, I know I would be as good as gone. And fucking up my five-year assignment is not an option.

"I don't feel good." Her eyes flutter closed, and her lips quiver as she yawns. I trace her hairline, admiring her beauty. She moves her hand over mine. "Will you at least sleep beside me?"

I stand to remove my jeans and throw my shirt on the floor. Before getting into bed, I grab my phone and text her father.

Tessa's with me. She'll be home tomorrow.

Then I turn off my phone. If he's ticked off, it's his issue, not mine. Let him wonder what we're doing. What kind of father would force his child to marry a man she doesn't love?

I move to the opposite side of the bed, lifting the blanket before easing in behind Tessa. At first, I maintain a cautious distance, but she shifts, threading her arm and leg with mine, then she nuzzles her head beneath my chin, wiggling until she finds her comfortable spot.

A subtle hint of citrus wafts from her hair, and I notice a few strands have escaped the braid. Delicately, I remove the rubber band from her thick, blonde braid and carefully unravel her locks, smoothing out the tangles until it cascades in soft, wavy tendrils.

Encircling her waist with one arm, I draw her snugly against my chest. To my surprise, instead of feeling suffocated by an unfamiliar closeness—especially as I've never shared a bed with someone without the intention of having sex—a profound sense of calm washes over me.

Peace has eluded me for more than a decade. Maybe this is exactly where I'm meant to be—with Tessa by my side.