Chapter 55

55

Nick

With a hell of a lot of patience, I followed behind Aubree, as she led me to the door of the adjacent room.

Standing there in that red dress, she taunted every fiber of restraint I had inside of me. I knew I’d have to take things slow at first, that she’d likely hate me, thinking I was dead.

Seeing her had brought forth a dark craving from deep within me—one that would never be sated by another woman as long as I lived. I’d been blessed with two once-in-a-lifetime loves, and no way in hell the Big Man would give me another chance if I happened to fuck things up.

As she stood staring up at me, the slight curve of her lips had my nerves on edge. With a click, she pushed the door open and stepped aside, allowing me passage. “This is the first step to healing your heart, Nick.”

My breath choked up in my throat.

The walls were glass, like the rest of the house, but unlike the bamboo that covered the ceilings throughout, black billowy fabric hung from above, with tiny bulbs of light that appeared to be sewn into it like bright stars shining down from the night sky. On the glass across the room, words had been painted in black:

The stars in the sky

Unhidden by night

Souls of our loved ones

Guide us by sight

But when dawn breaks

Bringing day’s light

Remain in our hearts

And all wrongs become right.

Below it, written in silver cursive against a black splotch, it read: I’ll see you in the night …

“I’m not a poet … I just … took thoughts from what you told me, and—” Her gaze fell away from mine.

“You did this? For …” My throat clamped shut and I pushed past the lump to swallow. Fuck, I could barely contain the tears.

“I guess a part of me hoped you’d come back. I prayed for a miracle that you’d still be alive. Even if you didn’t, I thought it was a good way to honor them. To always welcome their memory in this home.” Cupping my face, she stole my attention with her smile. “I’m not afraid to share your heart, Nick. If it means I get to share your life, I’ll take all of it. All the parts of you. Even your pain. You healed mine by killing Michael.”

“You’ve ignited a flame inside of me, Pistol Lips.”

“Flame? What does that mean?”

“You’ve restored my soul. Brought me back from death and filled me with life again. Made me give a shit about more than myself. It means you’ll never know that kind of pain again. You’ll never know fear. And if anything so much as attempts to pull you into darkness, I’ll be right here. You’ll never be alone.” I brushed my thumb across her cheek and kissed her with everything inside of me. Gripping her nape, I pressed our foreheads together. “I’d walk through the flames of hell for you, Aubree. Burn for you.” Lowering my hand to her stomach, I skimmed my fingertips across her tiny bump, where my future bloomed inside of her. “Both of you.”

She’d punched through the steel that caged my heart, sealed the gaping wound and claimed what belonged to her. I’d protect her. Kill for her. And in return, never live without her.

So long I sought retribution, and in Aubree, I found redemption.

I lifted her up into my arms, wrapping her legs around me, and pressed my lips to hers in a kiss as I blindly carried her back into the master bedroom. Setting her on the edge of the bed, I kept our mouths locked while my hands worked the knot of her dress.

Her fingers fumbled against the button of my jeans, until they popped loose, and she broke the kiss to push them off my hips, down to my knees, where I stepped out of them. Gripping the hem of my T-shirt, she yanked the garment over my head and sucked her lip between her teeth as her hands roamed my chest down to my abs.

“I can’t tell you how much I missed your body,” she whispered. “I just want to touch every part of you, so I know you’re really here.”

With my fists planted at either side of her, I caged her beneath me, ravenous and ready to devour her. Like a starving animal, I feasted on her lips, and within seconds, the kiss turned violent, greedy. Couldn’t get enough of her. More, more, a voice chanted inside of my head. Heat shot through my muscles, as I gripped her crown, holding her still while I tasted her, the mint of her breath and the sweet sugar of her lips.

Her palms hit my chest, and I swiped her hand away. I needed her. Had craved her too fucking long to stop. More.

A moan vibrated against my mouth. Yes. A hand thumped against my chest.

I severed the kiss, broke away, and a coldness filled the space between us.

She sucked in a sharp inhale. “Can’t breathe.”

“I’m sorry, I wanted this to be gentle, but after the harrowing task of bringing your lifeless body back from death that night … my head’s been in a bad place these last few months.”

“The feeling’s mutual. When you left me that note … you weren’t planning to come back. You planned to die that night. I hate you for what you put me through.”

“Hate’s a strong word.” Lifting her arms above her head, I pinned her to the bed and traced my lips at the base of her neck, inhaling her sweet scent—the only one that could bring me to my knees. “Are you sure you hate me?”

“Yes.” The hoarseness in her voice brought a smile to my face.

Pressing into her arms, I slid my shaft against her slit, teasing her, but goddamn it, I was a thread away from losing my mind.

I’d itched for the woman’s touch for months, especially on those cold, sleepless nights when I’d cut the shit out of myself, trying to push the memory of her away, until realizing in the end that I couldn’t. Couldn’t let her go. Like a selfish bastard, I’d gone after her instead, even knowing I’d be putting her at risk. I didn’t give a shit, though, just like a junkie didn’t give a shit that the next hit could be his own destruction. I needed her. Every fiber of me ached for one more hit, one more high that would settle my mind, keep the darkness from consuming me.

Kissing along her jaw coaxed a quiet moan from her lips. “How much do you hate me?” Shifting my groin, I positioned the head of my cock at her entrance, so goddamn wet, I shivered. “Tell me,” I demanded, squeezing her small wrists.

Her breath shuddered in my ear. “So much.”

With maddening, tiny movements, I pressed into her, but didn’t breach her pussy. “Maybe I should stop.”

“No!” Her breasts surged into my chest with her protest. “Please.”

“Please, what?”

Her eyes flipped open, but remained hooded with lust. “Fuck me.”

“Say it again,” I demanded.

“Fuck me, Nick.”