Chapter 52
52
Aubree
Icouldn’t remember the name of the stranger who held me down.
The building exploded before my very eyes, and the only thing I knew was, the man I loved had gone back inside after the man I wanted to destroy. From nearly a block away, the stranger and I watched the old Ironworks building crumble as its foundation caved into flames and black smoke.
The same thick black smoke that coated my airways and made a cough rip through my chest and my body turn numb.
Wake up, Aubree. It’s just a dream. Wake up.
Crystals of ice climbed my spine, freezing my nerves, and in spite of the surrounding heat, I went cold. Tears clung to my eyes but failed to fall. For a moment, I was frozen in time, watching fire lash out at the air, and swallow the building and my love, in one merciless scourge of destruction.
Nick.
Not even his name could summon the sobs lingering at the back of my throat.
“She’s in shock,” someone near me said.
A soft bed captured my fall, but my eyes remained glued on the burning building.
“I’ll come back for you. I promise.” His words played over and over inside my head.
A mask slid over my face, cool bursts of air filling my lungs, and though the air was cleaner, though it expanded my chest, kept me alive, I felt like I couldn’t breathe.
Fingers snapped in my periphery as though to peel my attention away from the blaze. I fought them at first, but they were persistent. A woman’s voice talked to me as if I could hear what she was saying. As if I cared. As if I wanted to be saved.
Then it hit me. A gut-wrenching, soul-crushing pain. The kind that ached every bone in my body, every muscle, and made every breath an effort. The kind that made a person want to curl into themselves and die.
I couldn’t say the words that slammed into my chest like a wrecking ball, crushing my heart. He’s dead. He’s dead.
No. Impossible.
I wanted run straight into the building, after him. Another part of me ached for death to swoop down and take me away. The duality left me paralyzed.
No. No way a man so strong could have such a meaningless ending. He deserved more.
The officer who’d clung to me as the first explosion thundered stood off to the side, talking with medics, voicing the answers that, in my heart, I couldn’t accept.
“How many were inside?”
“Looked like a lot of East side, West side gangs. I’d say about two dozen dead on the first floor. In the basement? Two, for sure. Backup just arrived when the first explosion went off, and they didn’t see anyone on the west or south exits, so, as far as I know, Michael Culling and Nicholas Ryder were the only ones on the lower level. Tunnels lead out this way, and we ain’t seen nobody exit. So I’d … I’d have to assume they’re dead.”
Dead.
The word echoed inside my head, a constant ring of agony clawing at my stomach. He’s not dead. He can’t be dead.
“Are you having any pain?” The medic’s voice came into sharp clarity at my ear, and I turned to face her. She looked tired, with wrinkles at the corners of her eyes and dark circles lining her sockets, giving them a sunken appearance.
“What?” The word came out involuntarily, as I processed the question. Was I in pain? “Yes.”
“Can you tell me where you’re feeling pain?”
A stinging burned my nose, and I clamped my mouth shut as her form blurred behind the shield of tears. “Everywhere.”