Chapter 40

40

Aubree

Lying on a bed of pillows alongside where flames crackled in the old brick fireplace of Nick’s bedroom, my eyelids grew heavy as his naked body pressed into mine. “So, this place … have you lived here long?”

“Only a couple months.”

“Did it always have heat, water and electrical, or did you rig that yourself?”

He kissed the sensitive skin behind my ear, and I twitched at the tickle of his scruff. “Rigged it myself.”

“You went through all this trouble just to kidnap me? I’m flattered.”

“Nothing but the best for you.” With his lips dragging along the edge of my neck, he cast an exhilarating prickle against the tautness of my skin, while his palm smoothed over the curve of my hip.

“Your hands are like nothing I’ve ever known before, Nick. Both pain and pleasure in your touch.”

“Pain?” His words vibrated against my throat.

Exhaling a long, easy breath, I closed my eyes and rolled onto my back, where he stared down at me, propped on one elbow. “Pain of knowing it doesn’t belong to me. That this is all temporary.”

Those blue eyes cut away from mine. “Being with you has only strengthened my reasons for going after Culling. Not just for what happened to my family.” His stare lifted, drilling into me with intensity as his brows furrowed and his lip twisted in disgust. “For what he did to you. How he hurt you. Tortured you.” His fingertip drifted along my shoulder. “This touch does belong to you, Aubree. And I promise these same hands that seek to bring you pleasure, will bring pain to those who hurt you. I will destroy the nightmares that haunt you, and deliver Culling’s fucking head on a platter for all he’s done to you. All he’s stolen from you. I promise you this.”

His face blurred behind the tears filling my eyes. “What if I told you that I don’t want that from you? Fuck Michael.” My blood thickened with ire. Was vengeance so important that he’d risk dying? Michael had too many connections to make him an easy kill. “I want you, Nick. Don’t you understand? If you die, even having killed Michael, in the end he’s won. He will have taken the last shred of hope.” I placed my palm against his cheek. “I can’t lose this. I can’t lose you.”

Frowning, he rolled over my body and cupped my face in his palms. “If ever a woman was capable of owning my heart again, you are. No matter what happens, Aubree, I will take care of you.” His lips brushed mine in what felt like a shushing of my thoughts, and when his mouth closed over mine, tongue dipping past my teeth, his kiss penetrated the wintry shroud of despair that kept us at a safe distance. It somehow broke through the suffocating uncertainty that loomed like a black cloud on the verge of destroying both of us.

I yearned to know his secrets. Not the ones he’d given me, but the ones he refused to share. The ones buried in some locked chamber inside his head where I couldn’t reach. The ones that didn’t answer the burning question swimming inside my own head—why me? What did I have to offer in his grand scheme? A ransom? A vendetta?

If only I could somehow unlock the secret door inside his heart, where I sensed something darker burrowed, protected by an ominous lie that hung on the air, perhaps then he’d trust me enough with his truths. I could heal him and perhaps he’d see something beyond the vengeance.

He’d see me.