Chapter 7

She had no idea how she made it out of the office and into the elevator. And only the knowledge that there were cameras everywhere, including the super-fast car, stopped her from giving into tears.

Firming her lips, she lifted her head—Oh God! Her hair. Her hand flew into the tangled mess and had her drowning in humiliation. He had scattered the pins when he was–

She braked on the thought and somehow managed to assume an air of dignity when the security desk came into view. To her immense relief, the man only gave her a cursory nod before returning to his computer screen.

No doubt, he was accustomed to seeing women coming from his boss’ territory looking as if they were tumbling from his bed or in her case, his sofa.

She made it to her car and practically wrenched the door open so that she could tumble in. Sitting behind the wheel, she allowed the tears to fall. What she had done was unthinkable.

She had sex with Richard McBride. She didn’t think it was flattering that he was attracted to her, and she was most certainly not going to allow herself to think about that – that episode on his sofa, inside his office.

Or the fact that her entire body was still quaking, her heart pounding. Or that she was still moist and sore down there, and her entire body smelled of his expensive cologne and sex.

Nor was she going to dwell on the fact that, for the first time in her life, she had so many climaxes that it left her weak. Neither was she going to recall the way his mouth felt on hers and when he suckled her nipples…

Oh God! Bending her head on the steering wheel, she sucked in a breath and tried to compose herself.

The knock on the glass of her door had her jumping up in startled surprise and it was to see the security guard peering in at her. He indicated with his fingers for her to wind the glass down and she did so reluctantly.

“Miss, are you okay in there?” He was peering at her curiously, bent at the waist so he could see her clearly. She had no idea what conclusion he came to regarding her dishevelment or the tears on her cheeks, and she did not offer one.

“I am just– I am not feeling well.”

“Should I call anyone?”

“No.”

“Are you okay to drive?”

“Of course.” She forced a smile to allay his concerns and wished he would go back inside and leave her to her private misery.

“Sure?”

“Positive.” To prove her competence, she pushed the start button. “Thanks for your concern.”

“The boss wanted me to check on you.”

“Did he now?” She cursed silently at the strange look he was giving her and managed to temper her tone. “That’s very nice of him.”

“He said to make certain you are okay.” He stood there as if not quite believing that she was.

“I am fine. Now, if you would excuse me–”

“Of course.” He stepped back and she dragged the lever into reverse and made her mistake. A look in her mirror revealed that he was still standing there as if he was under strict instructions to make sure she left the parking lot in one piece.

Letting out her pent-up breath as she touched the busy street, Collette tried to distract herself by listening to her favorite R for permanency, for the first time in his life, he wanted someone with a keenness and acuity that was beyond explaining or even comprehending.

When he was deep inside her, the tightness gripping him and drawing him even more, he had felt his heart shift.

He was a music producer who had coached and tugged at artists’ abilities and forced them to reach deep inside their souls to bring life and feelings to a love song, not because he believed the poignant words but because he wanted the best, anything less was unacceptable.

But tonight, he had felt every love word that had ever been spoken. He had felt the electric touch of desire and passion that had escalated each time he drove into her. He had wanted to touch her soul and wondered if he had.

When he kissed her—Oh Christ! When he drove his tongue inside her mouth, he wanted to devour her. Suckling on her sweet, honeyed nipples had made him ravenous. He wanted more.

He wanted nights with her, making love, worshiping her body until they were both weak to even get up the next morning. He wanted to take her to paradise, to love her until every last vestige of hurt was erased.

“Oh Jesus!” he whispered. Spinning around, he was about to get himself a drink when he noticed something peeking out from the cushions. Striding over to the sofa, he tugged at it and went weak as he stared at the flimsy black lace. She had been in such a hurry to leave that she had forgotten her panties.

Sinking down on the sofa, he held the material that seemed too fragile to not disintegrate between his fingers and recalled how it had looked against her skin. Bringing it up to his nose, he inhaled her scent and felt his senses spinning. It smelled of woman, that unmistakable scent that differentiated them from each other.

He held it against his nostrils and closed his eyes. She had tasted like heaven, and he wanted to spend time with her. He had no idea when his life would be taken away from him, and he didn’t want to waste another day without her.

She had asked for a week, and he had reluctantly given it to her. No calls—that was madness. He shouldn’t have agreed to that.

He needed to hear her voice and was afraid that she would try and get out of seeing him. But he had granted her seven days, and he would stick to his promise, even if it killed him and the way he felt now, it probably would.

Then after the seven days had passed, he would make damn certain she was with him. Tucking the material into the pocket of his pants, he laid back down and closed his eyes, content to let the memories of what they shared consume him.

*****

Collette woke up the next morning after a very restless night and decided that she should go for a run before going in. Thinking that it would help her to exorcise the ghosts of last night, she donned the appropriate gears and headed out.

It was the end of November and everywhere there was evidence of the fall. Her own patch of yard was littered with fall colors.

The trees were shedding their leaves, and the wet ground underneath her maple was littered with russet-colored leaves, reminding her that it was time to do some yard work. Or she could call Thomas, an elderly neighbor who did odd jobs for her, and could easily take care of it.

It was Saturday, and she didn’t usually go into the office, but she had some backlog to clear up. Besides, work was going to help to take her mind off what had happened last night.

She had yet to come up with a solution to the problem, but she had spent too much time on it already. She was going to clear her mind and try to forget about it for today.

She was about to go through the gate when her phone rang.

With her heart pounding and her knees going weak, she wondered if it was him calling her, even though he had promised not to. Dragging her phone from the pocket of her jogging pants, she went weak with relief to see that it wasn’t him.

But the person wasn’t someone she wanted to talk to either. Securing the air pod in her ears, she answered.

“Janice.” She started jogging, taking the meandering path that led to the neighborhood park.

“You haven’t returned my calls.”

“I have been busy.’

“You have been avoiding me," her sister’s voice was subdued, and Collette felt a prick of something that felt like a guilty conscience. But she had nothing to feel guilty about. She had been going to the altar at church, battling with her conscience and thoughts of the past.

“Okay, fine. I have been avoiding you.” She nodded at a runner she recognized as her neighbor a few houses up. “I need time to think, and I cannot do that with you and your husband pestering me. What do you want from me?”

“Trevor called you?”

She wanted to feel triumph over the turnabout, but suddenly, it did not matter. To her surprise, for the first time since her life had been upended, she was not thinking about the two people who had brought it around.

She did not dare contribute that to what had happened last night, that would have been ludicrous. It would mean exchanging one foolish mistake for an even bigger one.

“Yes.” She had reached the park by now and because of the early morning and the rain which had fallen in torrents last, it was mostly empty, the swings moving lethargically in the stiff wind. She was winded, her breath coming out in puffs.

The top of her jogging suit was clinging to her upper body, and she felt her knees turning weak. Sitting on a bench, she took several deep breaths.

“He wants you back.”

“It’s too late. What do you want me to say Janice?” She was unaccountably angry at the intrusion and wished her sister would leave her to come to a decision on her own.

“I want you to say that you forgive me. I want us to go back to where we were before.” “Would that be such a good thing?” Collette asked her softly.

She was sitting opposite the pond, and the slow and leisurely movements of the ducks making their way around captured her attention. “The relationship between us was never an equal one. I was the one in awe of you, the sister who wanted to take care of you, and you took advantage of my love many times.

I never said anything because,well,you were Janice—beautiful, poised, and popular. I admired your adventurous spirit and the way you grabbed life in both hands. And I was prepared to fade in the background.

But you were never just satisfied with that, were you? You wanted to humiliate me and prove that you were better, that you could get any man you wanted, including the one I had.” Collette sighed and rubbed at the tension forming at the back of her neck.

Her sleepless night was catching up to her and she wished she had the luxury to go back to bed and just sleep. But she knew that would not be possible. As soon as she closed her eyes last night, memories had chased her.

She had taken a shower last night, but last night in bed, she had smelled him and her nipples were still sore. Her vagina was sensitive. She was aching all over and feeling his mouth on her body.

“And I am apologizing for everything," her sister’s voice intruded in the journey down memory lane. “I have been such a bitch and if I could go back, I would.”

“But you can’t,” Collette said softly. She was no longer angry and filled with hatred, but she knew that things between her and Janice would never go back to where they had been and, even so, she wouldn’t want that either.

She was ashamed of the way she had allowed people to walk all over her, especially her sister and the man she had thought was in love with her. No more! She swore.

“Look, I don’t hate you, and what happened was in the past, and it was a long time ago. I cannot promise that I am going to welcome you with open arms, but I will think about it. I lost a baby because of what you and Trevor put me through, and that is what’s so difficult to get past.”

“I never knew about the baby!”

“Would it have made a difference?” Collette shook her head. “You were determined to get your way, and nothing would have stopped you. Now you are facing your own hell, and I truly feel sorry for you, Janice. Being that miserable is debilitating.

Trust me, I know. I know what it is to be totally alone and hoping for death and never finding the courage to go about it.”

She closed her eyes briefly. “I just hope you are not halfway there. That you recover from what you are going through. I want to say that you should work things out with Trevor, but I have a feeling that it’s too late.”

“It is.”

“Then I am here to tell you that you can move on and start over. I was forced to, and work was my panacea.”

“We get what we deserve, don’t we?” she asked bitterly.

Collette considered that as one of the ducks plunged its long neck beneath the surface and came back up, splashing the others. She wondered if they were annoyed.

“No, we don’t.”

“You are my only family," her sister’s voice choked with tears, and she felt a shimmer of pity. She had often envied the younger girl for her ability to live her life with only herself to please.

And how carefree she was. Collette had always thought that her main problem was trying to please others and never herself. She had always been so conscientious about hurting others. Janice had no such compunction and had always accused Collette of being a "softie."

“People are going to walk all over you if you don’t stand up for yourself,” Janice had warned her. Ironically, her sister had been the one to hurt her the most.

“And you are mine. I always have that at the back of my mind Janice.” She rose, feeling the wind piercing the protective layer of clothing. “I will let you know what I decide.” “Please call me Collette. I really need someone right now and you are the only person I have right now. I know I am asking a lot, but I really need my sister.”

“I will think about it and let you know. I really have to go.” She said goodbye and slid the phone back into the pocket of her jogging pants.

She stood there for a minute watching the antics of the ducks before turning and walking swiftly home. She would go to the office, finish some pressing work, and come back home to do some work. And she was not going to think about Richard McBride or his outrageous offer.