1. Rex

CHAPTER ONE

REX

All I wanted this morning was a fucking croissant.

But no.

Ten fucking years ago I went and became friends with Booker, so now I am standing outside the bakery, smelling all of Lacey’s delicious creations instead of being inside eating them.

“Please Rex, I need your opinion,” Booker whines at me.

I stare at him blankly.

“You’re vers. You are literally the best person to ask about this.” He shoves his phone in my face and I blink at the page filled with half a dozen dildos, each a unique shape.

“Is that a dildo shaped like a cactus?”

Booker grins. “Yup. This dude makes all kind of shapes. There’s a cactus one, baseball, hockey stick…I think it’s a whole sports collection.”

“Great. Why do you need me? You know Nicky enough to know what - wait, is that a Christmas tree dildo?” I lean in to look closer at Booker’s cell phone.

Yup, definitely a Christmas tree shaped dildo. complete with the star on top. That’s…intriguing.

Booker snorts and starts scrolling on his phone. “See my problem? There’s too much choice, plus, I don’t bottom. You do. Would you like a christmas tea in your ass?”

A spluttering noise comes from behind me. I turn around to see an older gentleman looking scandalized at Booker.

“Sorry sir, I’m trying to figure out a Christmas present for my boyfriend.” Booker says with his usual charming smile as if his explanation is going to help. “Okay, well, bye,” he adds when the man just continues to stare.

“Let’s just go,” I murmur.

I really need my fucking hazelnut crossant.

“You can’t tell your boyfriend what you’re getting him for Christmas,” the man finally says. “It take the romance and love out of the gift.”

“He isn’t my boyfriend,” Booker says, pointing a thumb at me. “I needed advice.”

The man doesn’t seem to be homophobic, so I leave them to finish the rest of the converation alone. I need pasteries.

I also need an orgasm and hot chocolate, but that’s not for now. If I indulge in a hot chocolate, I’ll end up wanting to nap in my chair instead of doing any tattoos today.

And the orgasm is a non starter.

Ever since Booker and Echo found their forever men, it’s stirred up some feelings in me.

Feelings of wanting my own man. I scoff to myself. I would be an awful boyfriend. I had the worst fucking example of what it’s like to be a partner.

If my dad wasn’t beating my mom around the house, he was doing shit like making her make him a special meal on mother’s day because he made her a mother. Cunt. No surprise it didn’t go the other way on father’s day. He didn’t deserve to be celebrated. Father, my ass. All that man showed me was fear.

Ugh, I hate thinking about my parents.

I know I wouldn’t be like him. Hell will experience an ice age before I lay a hand on anyone in anything other than self defence. But not hitting your partner is lower than the bare minimum.

None of this fucking matters anyway.

I don’t have any long-lost step brothers or classmates to fall in love with and it’s un-fucking-likely the love of my life id going to walk in to my tattoo shop declare his love for me on a random Monday.

“Hey Rex,” a voice says, pulling me out of my thoughts. I look up and see Lacey, owner of the bakery and wannabe matchmaker. There’s a guy she always tries to set us up with, yet none of us have ever met him.

“Hey Lacey. I’m here for my usual.” I look over my shoulder out the window and see Booker gesturing wildly and the old man nodding along intently. “And Booker’s too.”

Lacey follows my gaze and snorts. “Sure thing.”

I love this bakery. Lacey has rows and rows of bread on display behind a display shelf stuffed with pastries and cakes. Instead of plastic chairs and formica tables, there are mismatched armchairs and ash wood tables. It’s cosy and happy.

Pretty soon Lacey is handing me out order and I’m on my way to the tattoo shop I own with Booker. He is still in deep conversation and has been joined by two other people. Sometimes I wish I could make friends as easily as he does.

I walk into the shop and lay the pastries and coffee on the small reception desk. This place is my pride and joy. There’s nothing better than making a person feel more like themselves.

I look out at the window at Booker and his crowd of now seven people and smile to myself. Maybe I should take a leaf out of Booker’s book and put myself out there with more people. It might get me a man.

Even if it will only be temporary.