Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Ava

A nother day. The days are melting together. Viktor hasn't tried calling me in the last few days, and even though I never answered his calls or texts, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed. Somehow, they made me feel close to him.

I've been staring at the ceiling with no energy to stand, grateful I don't have to work today. I haven't felt well for the last few days, but I won't sleep the day away or lie in bed thinking of Viktor. I refuse to be one of those women. With the little energy I have, I get out of bed and go to the kitchen.

"Good morning," Lisa greets. "Still not feeling well?"

"I think I'm coming down with something. The last few weeks have been crazy. I've worn myself out."

"Sometimes I feel like that. Before I forget, I know it's my turn to get groceries, but I have to work late today. Do you think you can get them?"

"I have nothing better to do. I could use the distraction." I smile.

"Awesome. The list is on the fridge. Let me get you the money."

"It's okay. I got it."

"I can't have you pay for everything. We're supposed to split expenses."

"The world isn't going to end if I buy groceries this week," I tease her.

"I'm buying next week then," she tells me.

"If it makes you happy, have at it."

"Thanks. I'm going to be home pretty late tonight. I'll see you in the morning."

"Okay, have a productive day."

"I'll try. I left coffee in the pot for you."

"Thanks."

I grab the grocery list off the refrigerator. At least I won't be moping around the apartment. I think about pouring a coffee, but my stomach feels queasy. No need to make it worse, so I skip it. Back in my bedroom, I go to my clothes drawers, but they're practically empty. I left everything at Viktor's. At some point, I need to buy clothes. Maybe I'll go clothes shopping today. I take a quick shower.

As I get dressed, my cell beeps. I walk over, holding my breath. Maybe Viktor has finally decided to reach out. But I'm disappointed when I see it's Tina.

"Get it together. You need to stop thinking of him," I tell myself.

Tina: You've been MIA. I texted yesterday. Where are you? Have to talk to you. Call me ASAP.

Her words make me nervous. Has something happened to Viktor? Is that why he hasn't reached out? Without another thought, I dial. I hold my breath, preparing for the worse. For all I know, she's going to tell me he's dead.

"Finally. I thought we agreed you would stay in contact," Tina greets.

"I've been busy," I protest.

"Bullshit. You've been avoiding me."

"You said you needed to talk." I get her back on track. I need to know if something happened to Viktor.

"I have to tell you something. But it isn't what you think."

Suddenly I feel like I can't breathe.

"What is it?" I brace myself for the worst.

"Viktor is getting married today."

My heart sinks. He claimed he loved me, but he's marrying her. I should have known. I've been so naive. No wonder he stopped with the calls and texts.

"Are you still there?" asks Tina.

"Yes. I'm actually heading out. Can I call you later?" I need to get off the cell. My legs feel like they're going to give way and I can barely breathe.

"He doesn't love her. My uncle didn't give him a choice. You have to believe he loves you and not her," she says, trying to comfort me, but there's nothing that can.

"I really have to go." I end the call seconds before the flood of tears comes.

I try to swallow the tears, but there's no stopping them. It's one thing to know Viktor has to marry Fiona and another altogether that he is marrying her. It makes me question how much our love meant to him. But my tears will fix nothing. I need to start living my life. A life without Viktor.

I grab my purse and leave the apartment. For the next few hours, I'll be too busy to think of him or a wedding that is happening today. I leave the house and go to the mall. Right now, what I need to do is forget, and keep my mind preoccupied.

At the mall, I enter store after store, and walk out with nothing. As much as I try, I can't focus. Tina's words replay in my head. My heart breaks into further pieces the more I think about it. By the fifth store, I know it's pointless to continue at the mall. So I leave and go to the supermarket.

At the supermarket, I get a cart and take out the grocery list. I pretty much know what we need. I wrote half the list, as I do most of the cooking. Halfway down the list, Lisa has written cleaning supplies and tampons. Tampons , I freeze. I take my cell and go to my calendar. When was my last period? With all the drama, I haven't thought about it. It's been at least six weeks since my last period. I'm nearly two weeks late. No, this has to be a mistake. We had always been careful, and I'm on the pill. I pick up the tampons and, reluctantly, several pregnancy tests. There's no way I'm trusting just one.

The pregnancy test boxes are in my hand, and I've been staring at them for the last twenty minutes while sitting on my bed. I should get it over with and take the damn test. If a baby is growing inside me, I need to know. This isn't exactly something I can ignore or that will go away if I do. But taking the test means I have to accept the possibility that I'm pregnant.

I pace, trying to get the courage to pee on the sticks. Finally, I open all the boxes and take one stick from each box. I figured different brands would give me peace of mind. I follow the instructions and set the timer on my cell.

In tv shows, this is the part where the main character's BFF sits next to her telling her not to freak out because everything will be fine. For me, my BFF can't know. Viktor might have another baby, and as his cousin, she would tell him for sure. The alarm goes off. I stand and take a deep breath. Why did I ever have to cross paths with Viktor Manarch?

"I'm going to be fine. It's going to be negative," I tell myself.

I look at each of the sticks. One shows a smiley face, the second two pink lines, and the third says Pregnant .

"Fuck." Time for round two.

All six pregnancy tests tell me the same thing. In less than eight months, I'll bring a baby into the world. I place my hands on my stomach, thinking this has to be some sort of cosmic joke. I go online and search for the nearest clinic to confirm that the tests in front of me are, in fact, correct. People get false positives all the time, don't they?

I take all the tests and put them in a trash bag. There's no need to panic just yet. Unless a doctor, bloodwork, and sonogram reveal I'm pregnant, I'm not going to trust any of the sticks I peed on. I can't have Viktor's baby. I'm trying to move on and forget him, but this baby means I will have a part of him with me always. A few tears escape me.

This isn't happening to me. After everything I've been through, it's not fair. But one thing is for sure, if I'm pregnant, I can't tell him. He can't ever know about this baby. Who knows what he would do if he learned the truth? Because as I lay my hands on my stomach, in the deepest part of me, I know I'm pregnant. It's ironic—I left his side because he lied to me. Yet here I am, willing to keep something from him. Isn't a secret just as bad as a lie? But what am I supposed to do? If Viktor finds out, it might just be WW3.