Episode Fifty-Nine Do I Have to Do This Myself?

A zael

It's clear to me what's happened between them. I don't need to ask. In fact, part of me is happy about it. My thoughtful, non-emotional side hoped they would put their differences behind them on this trip. It will make our pack more harmonious, which will make things better for all of us.

That was in theory. In reality, though, seeing her look at him like he hung the moon makes me jealous as hell. I'll never forget the level of her arousal the first moment she looked at him as he stood at the end of the line at the rendezvous.

I'm not proud of this jealous emotion, but it's real, and powerful.

Dhar's feeling the same way. I can tell by the way he's clenching and unclenching his fists as he stares at the two of them. Nadira is smart. She's sitting between the orc and me and trying to keep her gaze from straying to Thallose's fucking handsome face.

That they've consummated things between them is indisputable. Even if I couldn't smell him on her, the affection in their gazes is obvious.

"You two are fully mated now?" I ask, spearing the starflyer with my gaze. I want to hear his words, watch his actions, make certain he'll be good to her. Otherwise, this male will get another middle-of-the-night talking to, and this time the orc and I won't be quite so… delicate.

"Fully mated? That description doesn't begin to cover it," he says as he gives her a smile that is so full of affection it can't be denied. "She's my heart, my soul, my treasure."

I don't move a muscle as my heart almost bursts inside my chest as though it's being squeezed in a vise. Then I force myself to breathe, and for the first time, look at my Nadira. She's so happy. The only word I can use to describe her is radiant.

How can I deny her this? After all the pain she suffered Up Above, all the males who used and abused her, could I stand in the way of her receiving more love? No.

"Good," I force the word out, then try to sound wholehearted as I repeat, "Good."

Perhaps Dhar is having the same internal struggle and came to the same conclusion, because he says, "I'm glad to hear this."

"And us, starflyer? Your two other mates?" I peg him with a hard stare.

"I respect you and am proud to have you as mates, but I don't love you," he says levelly. "I can't even count you as friends."

His harsh words actually make me like him more. If he'd sucked up, it would have been a lie.

"I can live with that," I say, glad everything is out in the open.

"All I want is for you to be good to our female and fair with the monk and me," Dhar says.

"Let's see how this works in the furs," Nadira says with a smile. Leave it to her to calm the waters between us.

When none of the three of us move, she stands from where we were all sitting in a circle on the floor and kicks off her furred boots. As she works the leather belt at her waist, she glances our way, lifts a brow, and says, "Well? Am I going to be in a room with the three sexiest males in all of Down Below and have to use my own hand to take care of myself?" She tosses her red braid over her shoulder, smirks, and shimmies out of her leather pants.