13. Violet

13

VIOLET

LA is too sunny. I've only been back a few hours, but I want to be back in that cold, damp cabin in Star Mountain with Kane.

"House is clear. I'm here till eight and then Sandy will take over till morning," my new bodyguard Liz says as she walks through the living room to where I stand by the window. She looks more like a supermodel than a bodyguard, which is the point of her services.

"Thanks. I hope this isn't too boring for you both. I have no idea if anything is going to happen, but I promised someone that I would have twenty-four-hour protection."

"Nothing is too boring," she says. "I like it when we don't have much to do."

There's a knock at my door, I jump from the sound. I start to head toward the front of the house to see who it is, but Liz stops me.

"This is the kind of stuff we're supposed to do for you, Violet."

"Oh, yeah."

She lets whoever is at the door inside, which means they're one of the very few vetted people. When Liz comes back through, Zoe is following her.

"Why am I just now finding out that you're here? You didn't call me when you landed." She hugs me tight.

"I'm sorry. You were tired last night and then we woke you up. I didn't want to add anything to your plate. Liz and I got a car."

"Yes, Liz, who is she?" Zoe asks.

"A friend from childhood. She's visiting for a while." That's the cover we agreed on for Liz and Sandy both if people asked about either of them.

"Huh." Zoe doesn't look convinced. "Have you talked to Kane today?"

"No."

"Okay, I'm guessing he's a forbidden subject?"

"I would just rather not go there. I know that I violated the girl code, but Zoe, I fell in love with him. Leaving him was hard and it'll be a very long time before I'm over him. I may never be over him."

"I'm sorry it turned out this way." She hugs me again and it feels good to be back with my best friend.

"Are you going back to work?"

"I'm finishing the movie and then taking a break." I just decided this while on the flight home. Talking to Kane about what I wanted to do when I was younger reignited something in me.

"Take a break? To do what?"

"I'm going to go back to school. I want to go to college and get a degree in psychology."

"Okay, we can talk about this more and the specifics after you finish the movie. I'll tell them you're ready to come back to set. They shot some scenes with a double, but everything left before wrapping has to be done with you."

"Who did they use as a double? I didn't know there were any scenes where one would work. I'm glad they were able to move forward. I feel terrible for holding things up."

"I did some of them."

"Really? That's great!" I'm genuinely happy for Zoe. She wanted to be an actress before asking to be my assistant. That's how we met, auditioning for the same part. I booked it and made a best friend at the same time.

"Well, no one will know, but it's work."

"We'll know and that's exciting." I've encouraged Zoe to keep auditioning, but she became more disillusioned as the years went by and she started taking over as my personal assistant. Then she used my busy schedule as an excuse for why she couldn't audition. I probably shouldn't have let her get away with that, but it was easier to have her help than that of someone I didn't know well.

"I guess. I'll be back tomorrow with an updated schedule and anything else you need to return to filming." Zoe starts for the door but stops and turns around. "I'm glad you're back. Sending you to Star Mountain wasn't a good idea. You need me."

I laugh, because she does keep me in check. "I do, Zoe. I don't regret what happened in Star Mountain though."

A look of disgust crosses her face, surprising me a little, but then it's gone, and she smiles as she leaves.

Once Zoe is gone, Liz returns to the living room, and I sit on my oversized sofa to try and think of what my next step is. I have maybe two more weeks of shooting this movie and then I'm taking my break. I've already investigated some schools and sent some information to both my manager and lawyer about my plan.

I want to talk it over with Kane, but that's not possible. Instead, I ask Liz what she thinks.

"I think you should do what makes you happy. Can I be honest?"

"Of course."

"I think you should go to school and be with the man you love. When you talk about those two things, your whole being lights up."

"I wish I could, but I left him, and I doubt that he'll ever talk to me again."

"No man worth anything would let you leaving him in a shack while he's sleeping stop him from being with you. I bet he's already flying here to tell you it's not that easy to get rid of him."

"If he was, I'd beg his forgiveness. I'm just scared that he's going to get hurt by whoever is doing this to me. I could never forgive myself if Kane got hurt." I know that I've hurt him in a different and possibly more painful way.

I get a text from Zoe, telling me to be on set at six in the morning. I hate early morning calls, but a long day means getting a lot of work done and being that much closer to wrapping the project. I thumbs up the text, so she knows I got it.

"I think I'm going to take a bath and try to relax. Make yourself at home."

"Okay. I'll probably just stay in here and do the bodyguard thing." Liz laughs.

I walk up the stairs to my bedroom. This house seems ridiculously big after being in such close quarters this past week. I miss the simple life with Kane. My bathtub, though, I did miss it. Specially designed by me and the place I spend the most time in my whole house besides my bed.

I take an extra-long bath and don't bother getting dressed after. There's no one here to impress. I climb into my bed naked. This bed is another part of my house I've always loved, but now it seems too big without Kane's big body next to mine. I wish he'd laid in these sheets so I could at least smell him as I fall asleep.