CHAPTER 6

Jenna

After Nana and I talked, she regained enough of her composure that she could go back from being a shocked human to a doting grandmother.Her wits returned and she went right about one of the things she loved to do best, which she hadn’t had the chance to do in much too long:making dinner for her granddaughter and yes, also her granddaughter’s very unusual guests.

While I entertained the guys in the living room by playing them some of our music and showing them some of our television, Nana went to work, and soon the house was filled with smells that I knew and loved well.She ushered us all into the dining room, where a beautiful meal of roasted hens, mashed potatoes, steamed vegetables, warm bread, and pitchers of iced tea greeted us.The guys loved it.As we dined, Nana at the head of the table watched me sitting next to Elliot, and Byron and Cade sitting across the table from us, and I could guess at some of the things she must be thinking and wondering about, and some things that she might be guessing.

I had told her about everything but the most intimate things.The parts about being abducted by the Gorgonos followers and being held captive by Nidaag, and Elliot and Uncle Neal coming to save me, had just about frightened her out of her wits.Compared to Elliot’s reveal of his dragon form, that was the thing from which she most had to recover her wits, and I felt a bit guilty having to scare her that way.She seemed more frightened hearing it than I’d been while living it and that was only natural, I supposed.Terrified as I’d been, I was still only nineteen and Nana was an old lady.It had actually scared me more having to tell her about it than having to go through it.But still, there was that other part that I’d so far kept from her.How would I ever explain my real relationship with the guys?How could she ever understand that?

During the meal, Nana said to Elliot and her other guests, “My sons, Marshall and Neal, were always more interested in things they didn’t know than in familiar things.It was always curiosity with them.Curious, always curious, my two sons.If I’m really honest, they were always going to worlds where I couldn’t follow, even while they were still right here with me.Space, the sky, the ocean, atoms and molecules—things I never really understood.But I loved how much they loved those things.As their mother, I was glad they had something they loved so much.To them it was magic, but the kind of magic they could see and touch, not just the kind of magic that you believe in.Jenna’s mother was more like me.She was more about believing things than knowing things.But she respected Marshall’s work.She knew she was married to an explorer.”

“What happened to her?” Elliot asked.

“Oh, there was an accident—a terrible thing.Cars piled up on the freeway, so many people hurt and Jenna’s mother—lost.”She closed her eyes and shook her head.“It was the most painful thing that ever happened to my poor Marshall and my poor Jenna.”

I looked over sadly at Elliot and held his hand under the table.He gave my hand an affectionate little squeeze, which I appreciated in light of this memory.I had never told him about Mom.I welcomed his sympathy.

”Cars are very different where we come from,” Elliot said.

Nana softly smiled.“Cars and so many other things.Jenna told me how you have this energy that can cross the way between your world and this one, and how it runs everything in your world.”

”Yes, Ma’am,” said Elliot.“We call it the Ambience.”

”The Ambience,” Nana repeated.“A power that runs all the cars and all the lights and…everything.That’s extraordinary.”

”It’s just normal life to us,” Elliot said.“Normal life is pretty different on Tellus.Even with some of us being humans and dragons and others being just human, Tellus seems like it’s a more unified kind of society than Earth.There aren’t so many divisions between people.”

“And everyone just lives together that way—mostly.”

”Mostly,” said Elliot.“There are some problems, but yes, mostly.”

Nana had a faraway look in her eyes.“In your world,” she said, “cars and buses and trains don’t have wheels; they lift up and float and glide over the road and the airplanes, or whatever flying machines you have, just lift up into the sky and fly along as fast as you please.Everything is powered by this Ambience, and there’s no pollution and your world has found a way so that no one goes without anything and everything is shared with everyone.No one is ever poor or hungry or homeless.Everyone’s health and all your needs are always taken care of.”She laughed a funny little laugh.“There’s no talk of people pulling themselves up by their bootstraps because everyone has boots and half of you have wings!”

The guys and I smiled funny smiles to match her funny laugh.Nana didn’t seem to be shocked or frightened any more.Having spent this time and shared this meal with Elliot and my other friends in their human shapes, she seemed to have started to learn how human they really were.It did my heart good to see that she appeared to be starting to accept them.

“Our world could learn a thing or two from where you boys come from,” Nana said, a bit wistfully.

“That’s why Daddy and Uncle Neal went over there,” I said.“To see what Earth and Tellus could learn from each other.”

”Well, considering the way things are here, it sounds like the bigger lessons would come from Tellus,” Nana said.

“Your world doesn’t seem so bad,” said Elliot.

”Trust me, there are some things about this world that aren’t so good, either,” Nana replied.

“But there’s always something for someone to learn,” said Byron.“There’s no way to know—yet—what Tellus could learn from the differences between us and Earth.It’s all wide open.That’s why I think Jenna’s father’s mission, and her uncle’s, is such a good one.We don’t know what Earth could teach us about ourselves until the two worlds are in contact.”

“There’s one thing I know best about Earth,” Elliot said.“I know my favorite thing about it.”He looked right at me when he said it, and a warm look came over Nana.The glint in his eyes practically made my toes curl.

From across the table, Cade said, “Yeah—the food!”

All eyes went to Cade and his plate, cleaned of everything except the bones of a little chicken.Byron raised an eyebrow at him and Elliot made a mock frown.I just shook my shoulders in a silent chuckle.Nana looked at Cade as if she were looking at a long-lost grandson.

Grinning with mischief, Cade said, “Come on, you guys!You know what the best thing about Earth is!”

Byron raised his glass and agreed.“Jenna!”

Cade and Elliot raised their glasses with him.“Jenna!Jenna!”

From the way my face felt, I must have been wearing the most embarrassed, bashful expression I’d ever had in my life.“Oh, you guys…”

Nana just sat in her seat at the head of the table, watching us all.I could tell she still didn’t quite know what to think about the life I was telling her about.Or the guys with whom I was spending it.

_______________

After dessert—Nana got out an apple pie that she had frozen just for an occasion like this— and after cleanup, I had the guys excuse us and go back out on the deck to watch the Pacific sunset, while I went with Nana up to her bedroom.After that unexpected bout of cooking for five instead of just for herself, she was ready to retire for the night.I knew, but discreetly didn’t say, that my own night hadn’t even gotten started.

In the upstairs hallway leading to the bedrooms, Nana let out a sigh.“Jenna,” she said.“Oh, Jenna, those three boys.They’re not even really boys, are they?Over twenty and halfway to thirty.But honestly, the three of them…”

”Yes, Nana,” I said, holding her by one arm and letting her walk at her own pace.She wasn’t exactly a doddering old lady, but a day like she’d just had was naturally enough to slow her down just a bit.“They’re really something, aren’t they?And they’re really very sweet.”

We reached Nana’s room.She got out of her clothes and into her nightgown and I got her over to her bed.She liked to sit up and read for a while before retiring, but I suspected that tonight my grandmother would fall right asleep with her book in her hand.I got her sitting up against her pillows and headboard, and sat with her a while, holding her hand.

“I’m sure they are very sweet,” she said.“And spending time with them the way we did today, I was spending time with just three nice, handsome young men.I could actually forget…what else they are.”

Patting her hand, I said, “Yes, Nana.I forget what else they are all the time.Most of the time that I’m with them, they’re just Elliot, Byron, and Cade.They don’t spend all their time the other way.”

”Yes, but there he was—Elliot, right there in our living room!With wings and horns and a tail and…!Jenna, how can they be that?How did their world get that way, with people living in a place full of…them?”

Shrugging, I said, “I don’t know, Nana.You know, Daddy always talked about how there were an infinite number of possible worlds, and how most of those worlds had to be strange and different places from here.With endless universes and endless possibilities, there must be endless strangeness.The world of Tellus is probably one of the most ordinary worlds, compared to millions of others we’ve never even started to discover.”

Nana’s eyes widened a bit at the idea.“You call that ordinary?!”

I couldn’t help but laugh a little at that.“Well, you never know.Probably somewhere in some other universe, there’s a world of intelligent, talking mosses living in cities made out of tree bark or something.The strangeness of this one universe probably doesn’t have any limit, so there can’t be any limit to the strangeness of infinite universes.”

My grandmother rubbed her brow and sounded even more weary.“Jenna.Oh, darling, you’re sounding just like your father now.Wherever he is.”

”Yes,” I said, a bit wistfully.“Wherever he is.”

We were quiet for a moment.From outside came the muffled sound of the waves rolling in on our private section of beach.Considering who was out on our deck, I was never more grateful that it was private.Then, Nana spoke up again.

”You really like them, don’t you?”

For a second I flashed on exactly how much I liked them, and how much they liked me, and how much we liked the things we did to show it, but I quickly hid my feelings.There are things a girl wants to be a bit discreet about, especially with her grandmother.“Yes, Nana.I like them very much.”

She nodded knowingly, in spite of the things I was so carefully not saying.“Especially the big one—Elliot.He’s your favorite, isn’t he?”

I felt myself blush.“Nana…!”

”Oh, now, Jenna.Maybe you’re a young scientist in training, but you’re also a young woman and perhaps I’ve gotten on, but I still know how a young woman looks when there’s one particular young man.”

”Nana, I’m friends with all of them,” I said.

”And I may be a little conventional or provincial about some things, but there are a good many things I remember from being your age.There are different kinds of ‘friends,’ Jenna.”

”They’ve all been good to me,” I said.“They’ve all looked out for me.”

”I can tell.But just like, as you and your father say, there are infinite numbers of worlds, there are many, many different kinds of relationships.Sometimes love takes on a shape you’d never expect—pardon the expression and sometimes love isn’t what we expect it to be—or doesn’t come with the number of people we expect.”

Hearing this from my own sweet grandmother, I could hardly believe my ears.I was suddenly hearing Nana hinting at things a girl doesn’t expect her grandmother even to know about, let alone think about.“Nana, really,” I said, “they’ve all been really good to me, and yes, I’m especially close with Elliot, but…but…”

Now it was her turn to pat my hand.“Hush, child.Hush.There’s nothing to be upset about, Jenna.Or guilty about.Our feelings can be very unpredictable, can’t they?”

”Nana, they’re all good.They really are,” I said.

“Of course they are.My granddaughter wouldn’t be friends with them if they weren’t good young men.”Her belief in me made me feel as happy as I felt just from being home.The love and faith of the people who matter the most to you in the world is “home.”

”You may not think about me this way,” said Nana, “but I remember how it was to be a young girl.Somewhere inside, I’m still the same as you are now, and oh, I recall the things I felt at your age.It’s the most common thing in the world for a girl who’s just become a woman to entertain fantasies about more than just one boy, or just one young man.We look, we see—and we want.It happens every day.Every girl sees and wants.I look at your three lads, and I can just imagine you—seeing and wanting.”

As much as I appreciated the honesty, and all the kindness and warmth, of her words, I began to feel just a little twinge of discomfort.That desire to be discreet with her came back.I started to get up from the bed.“Nana, maybe I’d just better let you get on with your reading so you can get some sleep…”

But she took me gently by the wrist and said reassuringly.“You have nothing to be embarrassed about, darling and nothing to feel guilty about.Jenna, all women dream and all women fantasize and just a few women actually live the things that they dream about.Many people aren’t brave enough to live those things.But you, my dear—I can see you’re different and I don’t judge you, Jenna.Not at all.”

Now I was more curious than embarrassed.“Nana, did you ever live out the dreams you had?”

She chuckled heartily.“Oh, dear, your grandfather was ‘dream’ enough for me.But no, I grew up in a different time than you and lived a very different life than you.Entertaining those fantasies was enough.”She made that same little chuckle again, and for a second I could see her at my age.“And they were quite entertaining.”She took on a wistful and melancholy look.“But I would never have imagined myself living the kind of life that you are, meeting young men like the ones you brought home today; young men who are also…that other thing.Jenna, I would never have dreamed such things were even possible.Other worlds.Beautiful men who become dragons.I never would have dreamed it.

”I’m not you, Jenna.You have a life that is so very far beyond me, and it hasn’t even really begun yet.The places you’ll go, the things you’ll do, the woman you’ll become—it’s just so much more.But Jenna, darling, no matter where you go or what you do, or who’s there with you, there’s always one question more important than any other, and you must remember that.”

”What question is that, Nana?”

She gave my hand a squeeze and a shake to emphasize her meaning.“Are you happy?Because really, the most we can do in any kind of life is to try to make ourselves happy.Because our happiness is our most important responsibility and you shouldn’t have to be my age to learn that.”

My eyes started getting wet from overflowing emotion.“I love you, Nana,” I said, almost sobbing.

”I love you, my sweet girl.”

And we pulled together in a great big grandmother/granddaughter hug, and in spite of myself I did cry, just a little.

Then I left Nana to get her night’s rest, and shut her bedroom door behind me.As I walked down the hall to the stairs, her words followed me.Are you happy?The most we can do in any kind of life is try to make ourselves happy.

Downstairs, out on the deck, was what made me happiest in my life at the moment and I broke into a smile and quickened my step, knowing how very happy they would soon make me.