10. Cecile

CECILE

“What’s this I hear about you putting Deidre out of the house?” Why is this house such a mess? I don’t recall my son living like this. Granted, this place is nothing like the home he lost because of that bitch, but still.

There were dirty diapers on the couch and empty bottles all over the mantle. The place looked like it hadn’t been dusted in weeks, and the baby’s toys were scattered all over the floor. I started picking up while waiting for my son to answer.

He’d opened the door and gone right back to the couch where he’d been sitting before I showed up. I could barely stand to look at him because he didn’t look like my son. This person sitting in front of me looked lifeless, like he’d given up on life and nothing at all like the fun-loving, carefree boy I’d raised.

“Leave it alone, mom, it’s my personal business.” And why does he sound so mean all the time?

“I don’t understand; is this because she wants to get married? Why won’t you just marry her? She’s already given you a child. My grandchild deserves a happy home. A complete home, with both his parents.”

“Mom, I already told you I have a wife. I won’t marry anyone else.”

“Hah, that’s rich. You’re divorced, and besides, you don’t even know where she is. That selfish bitch just up and left the state without telling anybody anything, and that stuck-up family of hers are no help. At least Deidre stuck around.”

He didn’t answer, just sipped from his bottle of alcohol, which seemed to be all he was good for these days. “Listen, you need to get your ass in gear before you lose everything. You’ve been moping around here for more than a year already, and we’re sick of it.”

“Your precious Mandy obviously didn’t love you; otherwise, she would’ve stayed. I don’t see why you have to act as if she was the most precious thing in the world. If she really cared, she would’ve stuck around and helped you raise the baby. She’s always been a selfish, stuck-up, self-centered bitch.”

“I told you not to say anything bad about Mandy in my presence. I know you and that bitch talk bad about her all day but get this through your head; she’ll never be half the girl Mandy is, and I’ll never marry her.”

“And what if she decides to move away and take my baby with her?”

I don’t understand what’s been happening to my son. He never used to be like this, he never argued against my word, but now I can barely talk to him without it turning into an argument, and it all started when that bitch asked for a divorce.

Things were finally going well; the nurseries were set up, both the one at his old house and the one in my home. Mandy had given in to everything we asked for and seemed to be on board with all of Deidre’s demands.

I’d been looking forward to settling down to help raise my grandson, who was the only one who lived close enough for me to see him as often as I wanted. My daughters had all moved out of town to live with their husbands, and Dan was the only one who’d come back home, so although I have grandkids, they’re all closer to their other grandmothers.

I was finally going to have a child that I could spoil, and that selfish bitch had to go and screw everything up. I never would’ve thought she had it in her, or I would’ve seen it coming and prepared. I had it all worked out, and she pretended to go along with everything, only to tuck tail and run in the end. I don’t see what her problem was anyway; my husband cheated on me multiple times, and I’m still here.

How precious does she think she is? I always knew she wasn’t the one for my son. That family she comes from has always put on airs and acted like they were better than everyone else, but I bit my tongue for years and went along with it because she’s what my Dan wanted.

After Deidre called me about being pregnant with my grandbaby, my only thought was for the poor child. We’re all adults, but it would’ve broken my heart to have a baby out there with my blood and no relationship, so I pushed hard for what was best for the baby.

I knew he wouldn’t leave Amanda since she seemed to have bewitched him when they were younger. She’s the first person he ever went against me for. I should’ve known then that she was going to bring trouble to my family. And I would’ve been right.

Look what happened in the end. He had to sell that nice house and give her half. They split everything down the middle, sure, but she didn’t get any of the debt. Somehow, her lawyers had worked it out so that his debt was his and his alone, even though they were married.

The thing is, she didn’t have any debt. She went to school on a full ride while my son only had a partial scholarship and had to take out loans to pay the rest. Hundreds of thousands of dollars for a degree that he now says is no use because Deidre is holding the affair over his head, and he could lose his job any day.

I tried explaining to him at the time that that was even more reason to just get married. But the more I pushed, the harder he pushed back and seemed to blame me for all of this happening. Like I was the one who had the affair.

All I did was try to make things right for my grandson and his mother. “If you want him that bad, why don’t you fight her for him? I’m done; I just want my wife back; I want my life back, dammit. I never should’ve listened to you.”

“What did I do but try to make everything work for all involved?”

“You berated her for not being happy about the baby. You made her feel small.”

“I didn’t do anything to her. And she lied and said everything was okay, only to run away, leaving you with debt and in this miserable situation. You need to get over her and get your life back on track. When was the last time you had a haircut?”

What happened to my baby boy? He used to be so dashing, so confident; he was the light of my life. Now, he looks like a shell of his former self, and it was hard to watch. I don’t know how many nights I’ve cried myself to sleep since his divorce. He seems to be on a downward spiral that no amount of talking can bring to an end.

“Son, you’ve got to let this go and look at things the way they are.”

“No, I could’ve made things work with Mandy, but you kept pushing and pushing and ran her off. You…. Look, if you don’t want me to say the wrong thing, I think you should leave.”

He tipped the vodka bottle to his lips, and I felt like I was drowning. How had things turned out this way? How had I lost control of everything like this? I thought things were going well between the two of them, so what the hell happened to set him off and kick Deidre out of the house?

I need to find Mandy. I can’t let my son keep suffering like this. I’ll drag that little bitch back here by her hair if I have to.

“Leave Mom, I want to be alone for now, please.”

* * *

DAN

* * *

I didn’t even lookup when she left. Who cares? I didn’t; I haven’t cared about anything for a while now. Not even the pint of vodka I downed was enough to erase the memories from my mind. I can’t believe I was such a fool.

I can’t believe that I lost the only good thing I had in my life besides my career. Mandy had been with me for more than half my life. All of my best memories are with her. Every good thing I had in life had come because of her.

Even way back when, when I wasn’t doing so well in school, she was the one who tutored me. On the days and nights when Mom was too stressed to cook for me and my sisters, Mandy’s Mom fed me and never complained.

It got so that I was at their house more than my own, and they even took me on their family vacations. I was part of the family, not just a son-in-law, but a son. I was happiest with her, and now she’s gone, and I can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.

As much as I blame Mom, I know that this was all my doing. Isn’t it strange how a clear mind helps you to see things from a completely different perspective? I wonder how long I would’ve remained in the fog if things hadn’t played out the way they had in the last couple of weeks.

It started with Deidre showing me the bruises I’d left on her and threatening to go to the cops if I didn’t do what she wanted. I’d balked at her suggestion to get married the week before, and she was not happy, but I told her in no uncertain terms that I would never marry any woman except Amanda.

That’s when she started claiming that I’ve been hitting her or strangling her, I think she’d said. For the first time since I met her, I used my head and asked her to calm down so we could talk. I didn’t even deny her claims since I knew she was full of shit, but I decided it was best if I protected myself.

I waited long enough for the bruises to fade completely, pretending all the while to give in to her demands. What she didn’t know is that I’d hired someone to wire my place so that if she ever accused me again, I’d have proof that she was lying.

What I didn’t know, and didn’t expect, was to find her drugging the shit out of almost everything in my house. I didn’t even know that such a thing was possible. The energy drinks I drank in the evening when I came home, the food she made, all of it was laced with something.

I didn’t know what that something was; I just saw her injecting something through the tops of the bottles. That’s why I never knew they were tampered with. She’d even dosed the kid with medicine in the evenings.

No wonder he slept through the night from an early age. And there I was, thinking that he was just a good kid, as she said. No wonder she refused to let him spend the night at Mom’s.

I didn’t say anything to her right away. I went and got checked out and found out there was LSD in my system, and it had been going on for a while. I was pissed. She knows I could be randomly tested at my job, and if they found that shit in my blood, my career would be over. What the hell was she thinking?

When I confronted her, she tried playing innocent, but I showed her the recordings of her poisoning me, and she changed her tune. She claimed she was only doing it because she wanted to give our son a perfect home. I’m not sure how her drugging me was going to do that.

I kicked her out right then and there, though she didn’t go quietly. I didn’t want her to take our son, but I’m not sure how that would play with the law, so now I have to wait to see a lawyer and get everything taken care of. At least she’d run to Mom’s place since she didn’t have anywhere else to go, but I didn’t put it past her to try to disappear with the boy.

Once I’ve gotten myself clean, I plan to go for full custody and use everything I have against her. Maybe then I can win Mandy back. Yes, that makes sense. With Deidre out of the picture, I’m sure I can win her back because she loves me; she’s always loved me.

Hadn’t she stayed even after finding out about the baby? That means she still loves me. She would do anything for me; she always has. Yes, once I take care of things here and get my life back on track, I’m going to put all my efforts into finding Amanda. The two of us will raise my son together, and my life can go back to the way it was.