☽ Chapter 7: For Days , Years , Death is a Wish ☾

?Chapter 7 – For Days, Years, Death is a Wish?

I groan as every step leading to my room causes a wince of pain. I hate life! is the thought that floats through my head while I slip out of my worn-out clothes and into some plain, comfortable black sweats and a black long-sleeved top. Alex is still helping me every now and then, protecting me from Beta Bastian and Mrs. Jasmine as best as he can, the only other ray of hope I have to survive as my eighteenth birthday rolls closer. The thought that I will meet my mate, break free from Hidden Claws, and never see this pack again after graduation and the eleven years of hell I have suffered makes me smile as I lock the door to my room and open the window. It’s midnight, and the moon shines down on me while the wind brings a much-needed breath of fresh air. The leaves of the large sugar maple tree next to my window rustle in the breeze, bringing the delectable smell of maple inside. At this time, the chores in the pack house are done and the Beta couple are most likely snuggled safely in their house. Now is a great time to relax and make my way to my sanctuary. With a grin, I silently slip out of the window and onto the sturdy branch that normally scrapes across the glass. This tree is a luxury, one Alex managed to convince the Betas I keep when they realized the room I was put in almost eleven years ago had a means to escape. His excuse was I was too terrified to try to sneak out and run away. They reluctantly kept the tree thankfully and I gained my freedom through this one act. I remembered the first night spent in the attic, the tapping on the glass and shadows cast by the sugar maple tree scaring me so badly that I was unable to sleep. I was curled up under the duvet cover, shaking like a leaf in the wind until morning, when I finally gained enough courage a seven-year-old could muster to peer outside and see the tree standing tall and proud with its bright red leaves. Alex promptly taught me how to sneak out once I felt brave enough, using the window and the tree. Beta Bastian and Mrs. Jasmine were none the wiser to their son teaching their disowned daughter how to climb in and out of the attic with the help of a seemingly useless tree. It took some practice every night, almost getting caught by patrols, but by age nine, I had mastered sneaking out unnoticed. With sure footing, I shimmy down the tree with deft movements and land silently on the grass-covered earth. Blending into the shadows, I look around and listen for a moment, making sure no one is near nor awake. I survey the pack grounds before sprinting towards the safety and cover of the forest. At the pack house, I may only have a few friends, but outside deep in the hidden valley, I have Lizaria and the Unicorns to keep me company. With a wide grin hidden behind the mask I wear, I make my way towards the river, keeping my footsteps light and body hidden in the shadows. With the calming scent of water and the sounds of the waterfall drawing nearer, I pick up speed, letting the glow of the moon guide me. It’ll be the Harvest Moon soon, and my eighteenth birthday is drawing close. Thoughts of being free from this place again bring a sort of giddiness inside my battered heart as I pass through the hidden entrance and into the tunnel. The magic in the air breathes life into me with each step until I enter the meadow, the scene glowing with the moonlight and wind bringing a sweet scent that washes over me. "You're late," The musical voice of the Elf reaches me just in time for me to dodge to the right, reflexes having me backflipping away to a comfortable distance. Lizaria chuckles, her eyes mischievous as the Elf and I stare at each other. “Sorry about that, but I’m here for training like always, Liz,” I answer, rushing forward and throwing a handful of loose soil into her face. This gives me an opening, jumping over the ancient one and quickly unsheathing the sword strapped to Lizaria’s back. Spinning around just in time to block the blow sent my way, the blades meeting with a clang and the two of us wait for an opening. My body is already sore from the punishment I received earlier that day, and it’s a struggle to keep my position with the blades locked against each other and sweat building on my forehead. With a deep breath, I drop to the ground, bringing my right leg around and sweeping out the Elf’s legs from under her and quickly dodging to the left. Lizaria lets out a surprised gasp behind me, but I am too slow as I spin around, ready for the next attack and barely dodging the blade wielded by my mentor but not the punch thrown to my left side. I gasp, my body flying backwards as the punch activates the pain from the large purple bruise made by Bastian himself. "What took you so long to get here?" Lizaria questions, her slow steps walking towards me. Too focused on the pain, I ignore her question and curl my body in on itself, trying to breathe through the pain and pleading for it to settle down. “Gem?” The footsteps stop, and the sound of a dull thud hitting the ground alerts me to the sword fight I am supposed to continue with Lizaria, but my body refuses to move. Even when I oh so wanted to keep practicing and fighting. I did not want to be weak anymore, and Lizaria promised to make me stronger. “Geminie, they beat you again, didn’t they?” By “they” Lizaria meant the pack and the Beta couple. I was lucky today that Alex was on patrol when this happened or he would have been forced to watch and partake in handing out the punishment. Neither of us could refuse an order, and a public beating where every wolf but an Omega could partake is a fan favourite amongst the pack. Warm hands cup my cheeks, and I look into the concerned eyes of my friend, her brows furrowed above me while I force myself to take slow, steady, deep breaths. “I spilt water while in a rush to serve dinner. They beat me in the middle of the dining room as punishment, then made me drag myself out to the foyer while everyone else ate and chatted away like nothing happened.” I explain, tears forming in my eyes at the pain I felt while fifty wolves surrounded me after Beta Bastien grabbed my hair and dragged me to the middle of the room. His steel-toed boots connected with my rib cage as he screamed at me for being a clumsy, useless idiot that could do nothing right. Everyone mocked me and laughed while I rolled into a ball and covered my head, silent tears streaming down my face. I learned long ago to not make a sound, since the crowd loses interest when the wolf being beaten as punishment is quiet and accepts reality. “When Lilly and Misbah rushed to my side and helped me to clean and bandage my wounds, it was already late and it took a little longer to finish chores. That’s why I was late.” I continued, feeling my friend take the sword still grasped in my hand and throw it behind her. “You don’t have to explain everything to me, Little Wolf. Just cry it out,” And with her words, I cry. My sobs fill the air while Lizaria cradles my body to her, my hands clutching at the pastel pink tunic she wears, while her hands pull down my hood and run through my curls. She hums a lullaby while my heart twists with pain and grief. Nearly everyone in my pack hates me, blaming me for the death of Alpha Sorus and Luna Reena. That and being a weak wolf who never shifted at age sixteen like the rest of my peers, I became an easy target for their abuse. It’s why Lizaria agreed to train me in the Elven way, as a way to protect myself against any sneak attack unjustly thrown my way inside the pack house. Between my exhaustion, tears, and pain in my heart and body, my sobs soon turn into sniffles, the little energy I have left leaving me even more weak. I hate this feeling. The feeling of weakness and helplessness. My life revolved around this feeling since that day eleven years ago. “Feel better?” Lizaria asks, worry still evident in her voice. All I manage is a nod, her calming scent wrapping around me, making me drowsy. I felt safe in her arms, something akin to motherly love from her. “Come on, Geminie. Let’s get you into the hot springs to heal, Little Wolf.” She sighs, pulling away and giving me a soft smile. She helps me to my feet, her arms wrapping around me while I lean on her six-foot frame for support. The hot springs located fifteen metres away from the entrance are surrounded by moonflowers, the magic within a welcoming warmth. Lizaria frowns as she helps me to undress, leaving only my undergarments on and the multitude of bruises and scars littering my worn-out body in her view. She stays silent, her forest-green eyes giving me a once-over before helping me crawl into the shallow basin and laying me down gently. A comfortable feeling washes through every pore of my body as the healing effects of the water take hold quickly. My prism-coloured hair floats out around me as I stare at the silver-white moon above. I did not heal the same as normal wolves. Being unable to shift when I turned sixteen effectively left me as a strong human, an even more disappointment in the pack. I have no wolf form, meaning the quick healing every wolf is born with never took effect for me, leaving my curvy body littered with bruising and scarring that took days, sometimes weeks or months, to heal. If I could get to Lizaria and the hot springs, then my body would be blemish-free. Sometimes that took days or weeks to happen if my punishment was severe. “Gem, when will you leave the pack? We both know you’re not safe there, Little Wolf.” I look to Lizaria, her statement filled with sadness and her eyes shining with unshed tears for me. At three-thousand-and-some-odd-years-old, Lizaria looks no older than thirty. Her lithe body is filled with muscle meant for fighting, and long hair that splayed out around her made many envious. If it weren’t for her long pointed ears, she could be a model in human society. “My high school graduation and my eighteenth birthday are tomorrow. If I find my mate then, I’ll stay. If not, then I… I will leave.” Lizaria is right, I have spent eleven years being abused for a situation out of my control. One of these days, I’ll end up dead without knowing how. The problem is leaving Lizaria and the Unicorns behind. It’s the only reason I was hesitant to leave in the past. But once I graduate, I have no more ties keeping me here. Alex already stated he would leave, and so would Lilly and Misbah. If I could convince Lizaria, then we could find a place to settle down outside pack territory, where the Unicorns will be safe. “I wish I could watch you walk across that stage tomorrow, Gem, but I have to stay here and protect the Unicorns.” Lizaria sighs, holding out a towel for me. I smile at my friend and accept the towel, wrapping it around my body and sitting on the edge of the hot spring as we stare up at the moon. “If it weren’t for the school being shut down for renovations after exams back in June, I would have walked across the stage already.” I chuckle. Lizaria will be busy with both protecting the unicorns as well as dealing with the magic the Harvest Moon will provide. Even if I asked my friend to join me for my graduation, being isolated from the world for hundreds of years and returning to the outside world would be a huge culture shock for her. After an hour of chatting and Lizaria promising me a graduation gift tomorrow, we watch as the moon floats across the sky. When two hours have passed, I dress in my black clothing with a sigh and bid farewell to Lizaria and the unicorns before making my way back to the pack house so that no one notices my disappearance.