6. Morgan

Chapter 6

Morgan

"When will you learn already?!" I groaned, wiping a finger across my glasses, trying to get a clear view of the forest around me. "Think first, then act."

I'd been in such a hurry to get the hell out of the city before the first snowfall came that I didn't even think about checking the weather app. The sky had been clear when I parked the car and unloaded my gear. A few miles in, the wind had started to pick up. By the time I was nearing my usual camping spot, the rain had begun to pour down by the bucketload. I could barely see the ground in front of my feet. I had zero clue how I was supposed to put up a tent in this downpour, but I would worry about that next. First, I had to find the campsite. Normally it would be easy to follow the gurgling stream, but all I could hear now was the rain as it splattered down on the hood I'd pulled as far over my face as I could.

A crack of lightning split the sky overhead with a jagged white-hot fork. I was momentarily blind, blinking away the afterimage burned onto my retinas. The thunder was right on top of it, the deep boom vibrating through my chest. I remembered Wild and Brave saying that if the hair on your arms started tingling, you should lie down as flat as you could. It was a sign you were about to get struck by lightning, and you didn't want to be the tallest thing out there.

It would serve me right for getting worked up by the stranger in the bar, I guess. Now I was paying for letting myself get so carried away. My suspicion had gotten the better of me, and instead of thinking it over this morning once the alcohol had passed out of my system, I let my paranoia whisk me right out to my car first thing, convinced this guy was coming after my wolf.

I needed to warn him! Of what, I wasn't sure yet, but I knew it as surely as I knew he was mine.

With a gasp, the ground shifted, and my balance tipped. I felt myself falling back, so leaned forward but ended up overcorrecting. Arms flailing, my foot slipped right out from under me, driving me down to my knees hard in the mud. I braced myself for the fall and hissed as something sliced my palm open. It felt like a jagged rock, not that I could see it with my glasses so fogged up. I held my hand close to my face and squinted. I couldn't see the cut clearly, but there was no missing the bright red smear.

"Dammit," I muttered, holding my palm out to let the rain wash away the blood. It stung something fierce. Normally, I would've broken out my trusty first-aid kid so I could properly sanitize and bandage, but that wasn't happening in the middle of a storm. So much of camping really would be best left as an indoor activity.

Groaning, I pushed up to my feet, careful to make sure my footing was sound. I was such a damn mess. My pants were smeared with mud, every inch of me was waterlogged, right down to my socks in my boots. But it was more than that. I'd been a wreck since the moment I first laid eyes on my wolf. I couldn't think straight, couldn't sleep, eat, or breathe without him. Maybe my shrink was right. Maybe I was losing my mind…

Dejected but somehow still determined, I began walking again, but as I looked around, the path I'd been on had disappeared. Turning around in a circle to check the way I'd come, there was no sign of a path or anything that looked even remotely familiar. "But I was just there… and then I turned right at the dead oak… and then…" My stomach sank as I realized just how bad this was.

There was no denying it. I was lost.

Dammit! And I broke rule #1: tell somewhere where you're going . No one knew I was out here, and nobody would even miss me, since I no longer had a job or friends. It wouldn't be until my landlord came looking for a rent check that I would even be reported missing. By then, I would already be dead!

Luckily, my blubbering was lost under another rumble of thunder; that way, I could pretend I wasn't as pathetic.

"It's okay, you're okay," I soothed myself, even as my teeth began to chatter. "It's not as bad as you think. Just take out your phone and use the compass app. It even works when there's no signal. You know the road is east, so just walk east. Easy peasy."

I crouched over, creating a little tent with my rain jacket so I could take the phone out of the waterproof pocket. "Okay, I'll just power it up and… any second now…"

Yes, in theory, the compass app worked with no signal. It did not, however, work with no battery.

Panic, frustration, the months of building anxiety, it all piled on top of each other, threatening to break me. I felt like I was adrift at sea, the current drawing me farther and farther from shore. I wanted to stomp my feet, wave my fists, tear at my hair, and scream and cry, but instead, I tipped my head back to the heavens and let loose a long howl, channeling my inner wolf. The howl might've lasted hours or mere seconds. All I knew was that when I was done, I felt… better. Centered. Balanced. A little more at peace.

"Huh. I should do that more often."

With a clearer head, I closed my eyes and tried to feel what direction my wolf was in. It was a total stab in the dark, but I figured it was no more crazy than being out here in the first place. I slowed my breathing and ignored the chaos of the storm raging all around me. I reached inward for that chasm, the missing piece of my soul and felt… a tug. It was faint, but I swore it was there.

Rubbing at my sternum, I turned toward it and began to walk.

The trees grew close, branches snagging and catching on my clothes as though they were trying to hold me back, but I refused to stop now. I'd come so far, and I couldn't just quit and let this all be for nothing!

I heard the stream before I saw it, and I felt relief and hope that I was back on track. Until… I broke through the trees and my smile collapsed in on itself, shoulders sagging. This wasn't the stream I remembered—or at least, not anymore. The storm had turned what was once a babbling brook into a rushing river. The water level was so high that it threatened to spill over its banks.

"But… he's over there." I stared longingly at the other side of the river, the insistent jerk in my chest telling me that was where I needed to go.

I stared down at my soaking clothes, then at the water rushing past. I couldn't get any wetter… so what was the harm in wading across? It couldn't have been deeper than my waist and was only a few yards to the bank on the other side. I was so close, I almost could've jumped across.

With stiff fingers, I made sure my bag was secure on my back, my boots were tied tight, then took off my glasses and zipped them up in a jacket pocket. Was I really doing this?

Wary of the slick bank, the soil soft under my boots, I crouched down and carefully stepped into the water. It came up to my shin, the water rushing into my boots and wicking up my pantleg. It was so much colder than I'd prepared for, and words like "hypothermia" and "shock" flitted through my head. Somehow, though, I still felt like this was my best option.

"Okay… you got this. It's just a little water. Go find your wolfman," I muttered to myself as the world's worst pep talk. Because with each step I took, it became clear that this wasn't just "a little water." It was, in fact, a LOT of water. It crept up past my knee as I moved away from the bank. As it inched up my thighs, the current pushed me off course, forcing me to stumble a step, but I kept my feet under me. My heart was racing, and I kept my eyes on the far bank.

He was so… close…

As I approached the middle of the river, I took a step, and suddenly, where the ground was supposed to be, there was just—nothing. With a lurch, I plunged forward, and the water jumped up to my chin and past my lips before I managed to find the bottom. I spat out a mouthful of icy water, coughing, my heart racing, adrenaline flooding my veins. My stance stabilized, even as the current did its best to lift me up and wash me away. Luckily, the heavy pack helped keep me anchored.

"That was close," I said shakily, a manic giggle slipping out.

It seemed I'd spoken too soon, because the very next step, I was gone.

I barely managed to grab a breath of air before the water closed over my head. I kept my eyes open, but everything was dark. I couldn't tell which way was up. Flailing my arms, I reached out for something, anything , to grab onto. Now the pack that had kept me anchored was dragging me down. My fingers skimmed the muddy bottom, then rocks, my nails tearing as I lost my hold. It was like what I imagined a pinball would feel, bouncing and ricocheting off rocks, fallen logs, and other debris .

My lungs burned like I'd inhaled fire. I needed air! Don't you dare breathe, you keep your lips closed! The pack, it was too heavy. I needed to get this backpack off now!

With numb fingers, I fumbled with the plastic buckle across my chest, all while it felt like I was being put through the spin cycle on my washing machine. When it finally opened, I almost gasped in shock and relief—thank gods I didn't—and jerked my arms until the straps slid over my shoulders and the pack sank away. And while I couldn't tell which way was up, I could still feel that same feeling inside me, like my own personal compass, and I kicked clumsily toward it.

Out of nowhere, the current slammed my back straight into a rock, and bubbles erupted around me as the last of my air was forced out with a muffled oof . Stars burst at the edges of my vision. Air! I need air! I pushed off the rock and came bursting out from the surface with a ragged gasp. Almost immediately, I was plunged back under the water, and I swallowed a cold mouthful.

This is it , I thought. This is where I die. I would've liked to at least learn his name…

I felt the hood of my jacket snag on something, maybe a branch overhanging the river, but it stopped my momentum, the nylon hooking me under the chin and forcing me back to the air .

Coughing and sputtering, I managed to direct myself over to the bank, where I rolled, crawled, and finally collapsed in the mud and grass. The rain was still coming down hard, so I turned my face to the ground for a few breaths of precious oxygen. My core clenched, and I vomited up the water that had been in my stomach, but I was beyond caring right now. It didn't matter that I couldn't feel my extremities or that I had zero clue where the hell I'd washed up. All I knew was that I was alive.

There was a tug on the hood of my jacket, and I remembered that it had caught on a branch or root. It was total luck that I hadn't been washed away and drowned. The chances of that tree being in just the right—

But the tug came again, more insistent, and this time, it was paired with a whine. What the fuck?

I couldn't manage more than to loll my head to the side, and there beside me, with my jacket in its mouth, was my wolf.

Logically speaking, it could've been any wolf, but I knew it was mine. He stared down at me with intense green eyes then let go of my jacket and laid down on his belly in order to wiggle closer. He nudged at my cheek with his nose, licked me once, then when I didn't push him away, he nuzzled at my neck, sniffing. His dark fur was dripping with rain, but when I dug my fingers into the fur around his neck, it was warm and dry beneath the upper layer.

"You f-f-found m-me," I got out as shivers wracked my body.

His whine sounded worried to me. I pet him and tried to assure him I was okay, but I couldn't seem to form the words. My tongue felt thick, and my lips were numb—to be honest, most of me was. The shivering had started to slow down, a sure sign of hypothermia. My eyelids were too heavy.

"I just… need to sleeeep…"

A sharp pain cut through the fog, and my eyes snapped open. My wolf had nipped me on the fingers, not hard enough to break the skin, just a pinch. "Ow," I groused. He gripped my sleeve and jerked back. "What…? Where are w-we going?" I asked as I rolled onto my belly and pushed up onto all fours. I hadn't actually expected an answer, but it would've been a good time for him to change into a man, just sayin'.

The benefit of crawling was that it warmed me up a little. My wolf kept looking back over his shoulder at me, yipping at me to keep up. Soon, there was a darker patch in the landscape, a shadow that deepened as we got close. "A cave," I panted .

I wasn't sure I would fit through the opening, but my wolf went first, and at the prospect of being out of this rain, I was willing to try. I had to lie down flat, and I wasn't sure if I had the energy to do it, but my wolf was there waiting, and that was incentive enough to keep going. The ceiling was vaulted once I was past the entrance. It smelled like wild animal, but as long as they weren't in residence, I wasn't in a position to be picky.

Working together, we managed to peel off most of my wet clothes, before I lay down, exhausted and sore. My wolf nestled close, and I wrapped an arm around him, absorbing his heat.

"I've m-missed you so much," I whispered into the fur, breathing him in. He didn't smell like anything I'd ever experienced. It was like… vanilla cupcakes, maybe, sweet and rich.

Now, when the shivers left me, it wasn't because I was close to death. It was because I was warm and safe at last. "Mine…" I murmured as I fell asleep.