21. Arabella

Chapter 21

Arabella

I slept like the dead. Even with Phoenix by my side, I was out cold all night. No dreams, no nightmares. Just pure blissful sleep. I'm not sure what that says. Was I just so exhausted from training with Rhys that my body decided shutting down completely was the way to go? Or was it because I had Phoenix beside me and I knew he would keep me safe? Logically, I want to assume it's the first. I was exhausted from training and my body didn't heal in the way a normal Angel's does. I've always had issues with healing thanks to the things my father put me through. I knew that sleep was a body's way of naturally healing so it's the best assumption. If I said that I slept so well because of Phoenix then that means I would need to think about the fact he makes me feel safe and why he makes me feel safe. He believes that we are mates. I'm still not sure, but I do feel a draw to him, a connection of some kind and even though it should scare me, I don't think that I am scared. If anything I'm intrigued.

Warrick has always made me feel safe. He was the person I ran to keep me sane, to pick me up when my father tore me down. With Phoenix it's different. I feel protective over him. When I first met him he seemed to just follow Rhys around. He was shy and kept to himself but he showed me kindness when his brother didn't. It drew me to him. Ever since he found me in front of my destroyed dorm, I've seen a different side of him. He tries to protect me and I've never been more grateful for it. However, I still feel an overwhelming need to protect him as well. That's why I won't tell him the truth about who hit me. Not now. Maybe not ever. It's the same reason I keep trying to leave his dorm. Whatever chaos is following me, I want to keep it away from him. If I stay here it will just drag him into it, but he won't let me leave.

Ugh.

Now with my mind running, I know I can't stay in bed any longer. I'll grow restless and I don't want to disturb Phoenix. Turning my head to the side, I see Phoenix sleeping soundly beside me. At some point in our sleep, he moved closer to me. Not quite touching me but close enough that if I needed him he could reach out for me. Ha, and he said he would stay on his side. If I had my phone nearby I would take a picture just to show him how wrong he was.

"Morning, Beautiful," Phoenix mumbles softly, his voice filled with sleep. His eyes are barely open as he rolls to the side and pulls me against him so he can place a soft kiss on my forehead. "How'd you sleep?"

"Like the dead," I laugh softly. "What happened to staying on your side of the bed?" I move my hand the couple of inches between us to emphasize my point. I don't actually mind as much as it seems with him being on my side, I'm just intrigued to know his thinking.

"What can I say?" he shrugs rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "I guess I just knew you needed me close by so you could get a good night's sleep. You did right?" His eyes widen in slight panic and fear.

It's tempting to let him stew and think about if his actions disturbed me at but I hate seeing the fear in his eyes. "I didn't even know you moved closer until I woke up. You're okay." I cautiously reach out my hand and pat his chest. The movement is awkward but I'm not really sure what to do to show him that it's okay. I never had these issues with Warrick. I wouldn't really call it an issue now either, more like it's new territory that I'm learning to navigate. Clearing my throat, I pull away, pushing the covers off of me, and get out of bed. "I, umm, should probably get dressed. I'm sure the girls will want to meet for breakfast. It's been two days since I saw them. They are bound to have questions."

It's an excuse. A lame one at that but I know if I stayed in bed with Phoenix I wasn't going to want to get out. I have to go to class today, and I need to see my friends. I can't keep hiding here expecting my problems to handle themselves. No, I'm a big girl and I can do it myself. The reprise was nice for a day. Now it's time for reality to sink back in.

"Not nice," he groans, pushing himself to sit up in bed. The movement causes his arms to flex and makes me really start to reconsider if getting out of bed was the right thing to do. "Don't stare at me like that, Beautiful. You won't like what will happen. I'm already dying here from waking up with the most beautiful girl in the world beside me. Go get dressed and give me a minute," he demands. It looks like he's in pain which causes me to hesitate. "Arabella, go," he groans again looking at me.

"Okay, okay, I'm going," I scramble away until I reach the closet. Flicking on the light, I slam the door behind me, hiding from him. I have no idea what his issue is. I thought everything was going well between us and then it's like something just flipped and he wanted me far away from him. It makes no sense.

Ugh, I hate guys. This is why I need to get back to rooming with Harper and Isis. I wouldn't have these issues with them.

Reaching for the bag of clothes that Phoenix must have moved in here at some point while I was sleeping, I sit on the floor and begin to sort through it hoping to find enough clothes to piece an outfit together. The Divine must be on my side because fifteen minutes later, I've managed to piece together a wrinkled uniform. It's not perfect but it'll have to do. Quickly, I toss them on, doing my best to smooth out the wrinkles before opening the closet door.

"Phoenix?" I question, softly, peeking my head out. I don't want him to get mad at me or something if I come out before I'm ready. When I don't hear him answer me, I walk out the open door and realize the bed has been made but he's nowhere to be found. Well then, I guess he really didn't want to face me again after whatever that was.

Shoving down the disappoint I feel, I place his folded clothes once more on the edge of the bed and turn to leave the room. I probably should take my stuff with me but I'll just get it later once I figure out where I'll be sleeping tonight. I'd rather not be dragging it all around the campus until then. That would just cause people to look at me. I'm sure I'm already going to get some looks thanks to missing class and having my dorm broken into as is.

"Good morning, Princess," Rhys calls out the second I enter the living room. Behind him is Phoenix, standing with his back to me as he works over the stove. Knowing that he won't even turn to look at me, hurts. I really wish I knew what I did wrong. I didn't think I had done anything to cause his ire.

"Morning, Rhys," I answer as nicely as I can trying to keep any hint of annoyance out of my tone. We may have called a slight truce yesterday but I highly doubt it rolls into today. The sooner I can escape the awkwardness in this dorm room the better. "I'm just going to, umm, go find the girls." Rushing to where I see my phone and bag sitting on the end table beside the couch, I grab both of them and head toward the door. "Thanks, and uh, have a good day," I call out as I open the door.

"Where do you think you're running off to without a guard, Princess?" Rhys whispers in my ear. The only thing besides his whispering that gives away he is behind me is that I can't shut the door. Damnit.

"I don't need a bodyguard, Rhys," I emphasize, pushing him away from me as I try to get out the door once more. "I'm safe with my friends."

"Nope, not good enough," Rhys demands, grabbing my bicep and pulling me back into the room. "Sit on that stool and eat the breakfast your mate cooked for you like a good little angel before we all go to class," he demands, pushing me to the same exact stool he made me sit in yesterday.

"I don't have a mate in here," I retort, clicking my tongue as I take a seat. Phoenix's back stiffens at my response before he forces himself to relax and turns back around to face me with a blank look on his face.

"Here's your breakfast," he states without any sort of emotion in his tone. He places an omelet on my plate, the same way Rhys had yesterday. What is wrong with both of these men?

"Honestly, I'm good. I was just going to grab something from the cafeteria with the girls." I push the plate away from me determined not to eat it. The last thing I want is to feel more indebted to either of them. I thought Phoenix and I were going down the right path but whatever changed this morning now has me cautious. I won't just be someone that he uses. I deserve better than that. I wanted better than that, and I thought he was better than it.

"Eat the omelet, Arabella," Phoenix demands with a bite in his tone. His eyes are still dull, but his tone lets me know exactly how he is feeling.

Yup, I definitely needed to figure out a way to get out of here as soon as possible. If eating the damn omelet got me an out then fine, I'll eat the damn thing. Staring at Phoenix, I pull the plate closer to myself and take a large bite. "Yum," I moan around the food. "Great job." It's sarcasm at its greatest but sue me. He hurt me this morning. He doesn't deserve me being nice to him.

"Oh my god," Rhys groans, slamming his fist on the counter. "Can you two please just get over yourselves and cement your mate bond already? The tension between you both is palatable. It's like you could cut a stone with how much tension is in this room and it isn't the good type of tension either. What did you not fuck her brains out last night the way you've been wanting to?" Rhys stares at his brother. I watch as his cheeks redden and he hangs his head not bothering to answer the question—a question I very much would like to hear the answer to. I thought the same thing last night, that he at least liked me. So what changed?

"And you!" he points at me. "You need to get over your little prissy attitude that you can do whatever you want. My brother actually gives a fuck about you despite me telling him it is a terrible idea. So don't be a dick. He's your mate. Treat him better than that."

All I can do is stare at him as he berates me. One, I don't think he should even be involved in this conversation. It's between Phoenix and me if he is ever going to talk to me again. Two, we don't even know for sure that we are mates so how the hell does he know that?

"Oh, don't stare at me like that. Either of you," he bitches looking between both of us. "I did the fallen ceremony while you were both sleeping. Check your pointer fingers," he laughs. "It confirmed you're both mates. You're welcome. Now can we get this show on the road? Some of us actually want to get to class and not stand around all day dealing with the awkwardness between you two."

"You're a dick," I mutter, hating the fact he intervened in something that he had no right to do. It was private between Phoenix and me. A decision we should have been making together. Though at the same time, I guess it answered all the confusion and questions I had. Somehow the Divine has granted me three mates. One of which is a Fallen Angel. Oh man, my dad would absolutely lose his shit if he knew the truth. I'm pretty sure he would kill Phoenix on the spot. He definitely would if I went through the mating ceremony. His perfect daughter has a connection to the fallen. He'd have even more of a reason to disown me. Hell, I don't think he would ever allow me back in Aeris either. I'd become cast out, a fallen forced to live amongst the others, no longer considered an angel.

"I can see where your mind is taking you, Arabella," Phoenix whispers from across the counter from me. "Don't go there. We will take this one day at a time. There is no rush to make any sort of decision. I wish my brother," he growls the word turning to stare at Rhys, "would have minded his own business and let us make the decision ourselves but I am thankful because now I know that these things I feel for you aren't made up. They are real."

"This...," I stutter trying to find the words. "This is all a bit much for me right now." Tears spring to the corner of my eyes and it takes everything in me to push them back as I move to stand and grab my bag and phone once more. "I need time. This morning... It was too much." I barely manage to get the words out and turn my back on them before the tears begin to fall. This time, Rhys doesn't stop me as I open the door and run down the hall. I hear Phoenix calling out my name behind me but I'm running down the stairs before he can get close enough. I need time, space, some silence so I can think things through.

"Arabella?" Isis questions, her voice laced with concern the second my feet touch the stone floor in the common room. "Are you okay?"

"I... ummm," I stutter, looking behind me to see if Phoenix caught up to me. I know he should be coming down those stairs any second now. "Get me out of here?" I plead, my eyes wide as I hear footsteps echoing down the stairs. They sound like they are getting closer and I'm in full flight mode right now.

"Let's go." She links her arm through mine and guides me out the front door and straight down the path through the forest. I'm thankful that she doesn't ask any more questions and just helps me get away. True friendship right here.

Knowing it's a mistake, I turn and look behind me to see if Phoenix is following. I catch a glimpse of him in front of the double doors leading to our building. The one door he exited is settled against his side as he stares at my retreat. His expression is broken, causing my heart to pull at me. I don't like seeing him upset but I need to do this for me. I need space. I can't put other people before myself. Especially not this. Knowing we're mates is huge, and terrifying. There is so much on the line. I have too many questions, and most of them are ones I need to answer for myself before I can confront him about what this means to us.

"Hungry?" Isis asks as we reach the front doors of the main hall. I was so wrapped in my thoughts I hadn't even realized we had spent the last ten minutes walking.

"Not really," I mutter, shaking my head. It's true, I'm not. I ate a few bites of the omelet Rhys and Phoenix, or well Rhys forced me to eat, but it's sitting like a lump in my stomach, all but making me nauseous. Food and I don't mix when I'm upset and confused. I only ate a couple of bites because I knew Rhys wouldn't let me leave if I hadn't. The bastard seems to enjoy telling me what to do and since I was imposing on their "hospitality" I thought it would be rude.

"Okay, well let me grab something quick to go and then we can find somewhere quiet to sit before classes start." Isis guides us to the cafeteria and does exactly what she says, grabbing a protein bar and banana before leading us through the halls on the first floor. Most of it is a blur to me. I haven't spent as much time exploring the school as I wish I had. It's on my to-do list, you know the ever-growing one that never seems to have an end.

"Here looks good," she says, looking around to make sure we're alone. She pulls me into what looks like a small classroom or study room that is completely empty.

Walking around slowly I inspect the room she found us. Two small stained glass windows on opposite corners of the same wall provide light into the room. In the center of the room is a dark wooden table with four plush chairs surrounding it. On the right wall is a large tapestry depicting two angels, one of which is healing a fallen dragon. I gasp looking at it, shocked by what I see. I knew at one point the races had gotten along, but the war between them was so long ago I had doubted anything back then still existed. "Is that real?" I turn to my friend and see her smiling at me.

"It is. We learned about it in Species History class just last week. It's part of why I knew this room was here. According to Councilwoman Talia, in each study room there is a similar canvas depicting a scene of when the races got along," she explains, pulling out one of the seats and settling into it. "Now, before you try to deflect and hide the subject, care to talk about what happened this morning? Or where you've been?"

"Both are very long stories," I sigh, collapsing into the chair opposite of her. I place my bag on the table in front of me and begin to play with the fraying strap as a distraction.

"Well, if it's that long of a story, then let's wait a few minutes. Harper is on her way as well and I doubt you want to repeat the story twice," Isis smiles, focusing on unwrapping her protein bar and taking a bite. She watches me stare at her eating and laughs, reaching into her bag to pull out a second protein bar and slides it across the table my way.

"I said I wasn't hungry," I laugh, spinning the bar on the table.

"Yeah, you did, but I also know you need to keep your energy up. So eat it while we wait," she says pointedly, staring me down until I begin to open the wrapper and take my first bite.

"This is actually better than I expected. Thanks," I smile, and focus my attention back on the breakfast. I really do need to learn to focus on taking care of myself more and trusting my friends. Which is exactly why when Harper gets here then I am going to tell both of them everything, and I mean everything. I can't keep secrets from them, not when I have a feeling the only way I'm going to find any sort of solace or answers is with their help. I can only hope they aren't going to take off running when I tell them about the journal or Phoenix being my mate. Maybe I should make a bet with myself to see which one freaks them out more.