1. Arabella

Chapter 1

Arabella

" C lass, please settle down," Mrs. Callie calls out in an attempt to get the class to stop talking and pay attention. It's two days before the mating ceremony takes place for the year. No one wants to be sitting here in class listening to a lecture about the history of angels. We've had this information drilled into our brains since we were born. You'd think our final year of school would not include history, but the Seraphim think we still have something to learn.

I almost feel bad for Mrs. Callie. She tries hard to keep our attention and make a boring class interesting—I'll give her that. Some of the topics she has taught us were interesting. We finally learned the origin of fallen angels, but I have a feeling there is more to it. Something about the story has never sat right with me, but I know better than to ask questions or draw any sort of attention to myself. Well, more than I already do on a daily basis just for existing.

My father is a part of the Seraphim, the leader of angels. This means I have eyes on me at all times. The expectation of perfection hangs over my head every day, both in school and at home. I try hard not to let it bother me, to push to be the best angel I can be. Some days, I succeed, some classes, I succeed, but in the areas I'm lacking in, everyone reminds me every day that I'm not worthy of the Seraphim title.

"Mrs. C, you know none of us care about history. Just let us have a free period. Please," Stark calls out from the back of the room. The rest of his little friend group also chimes in, begging Mrs. Callie.

"Actually, I was going to discuss the mating ceremony with all of you instead of our history lesson today, but if you all want to go in blind, who am I to stop you?" Mrs. Callie sits at the front of the room and opens a book in front of her. Her show of disinterest has the class falling silent almost immediately.

Once the room is entirely silent, we all look between ourselves and back at Mrs. Callie. She knew that she would have us there. Rumors of the mating ceremony are all any of us have heard. No one's allowed to talk about what takes place. They say when we're old enough to attend, then we will learn. I think it's bullshit, but who am I to argue with our laws.

"Does this mean you want to hear?" Mrs. Callie looks up at the room, taking in all our faces. It seems she has made her decision when she rises to her feet, walks around her desk, and settles to lean against it before speaking again.

"Very well," Mrs. Callie nods. "The mating ceremony is a special day. Once a year, all angels who have turned twenty will attend. Only one family member may attend to present you to the world. This ceremony means that you are an adult in our world. Not everyone will find their mate immediately; sometimes it takes a try or two, but after you've attended your first ceremony, you don't need an escort for the rest."

I already know that if I don't find my mate during my first ceremony, my father will punish me. Just another disgrace to add to my growing list. I've tried to talk to my mom about it, but my complaints fall on deaf ears. Her only advice is to try harder and to do what my father tells me to do. Shm, doesn't she know that I am?

"Throughout the ceremony, you all will remain quiet unless spoken to. Open yourself up to the magic, don't fight it or be scared. Trust in the process," Mrs. Callie continues, pulling me from the path my thoughts have taken. "If you are lucky enough to be chosen the first time around, you and your mate will be led to a private chamber to wait. Once all pairs are chosen you will be brought back out to do your bonding."

"Why are we taken to another room? I thought everyone went at once?" Gabriella asks from the back of the classroom. Her voice is filled with the same confusion I feel. The information I was given was that everything happened at once, but it would be nice to get to know my intended mate before we are tied together forever.

"The ceremony begins as one, but the bonds don't always appear immediately. Everyone's magic is different. The bonds have an hour to form. If none do then you can try again next year," her voice softens in answer as her eyes take on a sad look. When she catches me watching her, Mrs. Callie schools her expression putting on a blank face. How much is she not telling us and why did she hide her expression when she looked at me? Does she expect me to fail in the same way everyone else does?

"What happens during the bonding?" Celeste inquires. Her tone makes her seem superior to the rest of us. She's been that way since we were kids. Our parents have forced us to hang out but it's always her degrading me. She hates me for no reason and honestly, the feeling is mutual.

"Mates are given the choice to accept or reject one another," our teacher answers before several people gasp. I was one of the few who didn't. I know the risk of being rejected and what happens to those that are. It's not something many talk about but it's also not something that is kept hidden either. Thank the Divine for my love of the library and reading. We don't have many books on the subject but I have found a few that mention a school for the rejected. RISE Academy is where everyone who is rejected is sent. It's a reform school for supernaturals, so they can improve the qualities that they were rejected for with hopes their mate will take them back. It doesn't happen often but it does happen.

"Why would someone reject their mate?" Gabriella asks. She almost sounds scared, turning to look at her I realize that she is scared. Terrified even. She shouldn't be worried, her magic is good and everyone loves her.

"Everyone has their reasons. I wish I could tell you why someone would want to reject the other half of their soul, but I cannot." Mrs. Callie shakes her head and sighs. It's clear talking about this bothers her. I wish I knew why but I never really bothered to get to know my teachers or anyone. I try keeping to myself, it's better that way.

"Well, we all know Arabella will be rejected," Jack jokes and several others laugh with him. "She has no control of her magic."

"That is enough, Jack," Mrs. Callie shouts. "One more outburst like that and this conversation is over. Am I clear?"

A chorus of "Yes Ma'ams" answer her. All I can do is sink deeper in my seat and hope that a hole will open beneath me and swallow me whole. I know I'm a disappointment; I don't need the reminder at school. I already have enough of it at home from my father.

I'm terrified I will be rejected. It's a fear that has hung over my head since I first learned my powers don't behave in a normal manner for angels. Once the rumors started, it just got worse for me. I can't escape it, the fear, the rejection, the jokes.

The only place I find a semblance of peace is when I'm with my friend Warrick. He's ten years older than me but he's the only person who hasn't judged me and has helped me with my powers, helped me find workarounds so I can control them. I know the only reason my father is okay with our private lessons is because he doesn't find Warrick to be a threat. My father believes that he has everyone, including Warrick, under his thumb and that no one would ever question his orders. He has know idea that Warrick is my only friend and has been protecting me in his own way from my father's wrath. If any of them knew I was falling for him though then that would be a disaster.

"Does anyone have any further questions about the ceremony? I know I didn't tell you much but it's something you all just need to experience, it isn't easy to prepare for it. I'm sure all of you are nervous but just trust in the Divine and trust in yourself. Everything will be as it should be," Mrs. Callie refocuses the conversation. I appreciate her trying but it's too late now. The words got to me and now I'm going to be thinking about it for the next two days.

"No questions? Okay, class is dismissed. Go have a relaxing night and enjoy the next two days," Mrs. Callie calls out as she heads around her desk.

My classmates waste no time running out of the room, but I'm slow to follow. Hopefully, the longer I drag my feet, the fewer people will be in the hallway when I leave. I also don't want to go home yet. I'll be asked why I'm home early instead of being in class, and it just means we can have an earlier birthday dinner that I already know probably won't be about me at all. That is just the icing on the cake for me.

"Happy birthday, Arabella," Mrs. Callie calls out as I pass her desk to exit. She smiles brightly at me and nods goodbye as I exit, not bothering to answer her.

Right. Happy birthday to me. Twenty years old and nothing to show for it. That's what every girl wants to experience. At least the few girlfriends I have promised to go out dancing with me tonight after the dinner. Now that is something to look forward to. We booked a VIP booth at our favorite club in the city just for this. It's to celebrate all of our birthdays because we don't know if that's something we'll get to experience together again or not. We don't get to see each other often, but with Warrick's help he got my father to agree to let me out for a couple of hours of fun tonight. A small birthday present he called it.

Walking out the school doors, I come to a dead stop when I see Warrick standing at the bottom of the stairs, waiting for me. Fuck! I wasn't expecting an escort today. I was really looking forward to the silent walk home by myself.

"Hey, Little One," Warrick smiles up at me, wearing a pair of black aviators that hide is blue eyes. He's standing there in blue jeans with rips and a white t-shirt that hugs his muscles in all the right places. I can make out the bulk in his biceps from the top of the stairs. His black hair shines in the sunlight making me want to run my hands through it. Even with a couple of stairs between us he is still almost the same height standing at six foot three.

Why must he look so good? Ugh, the Divine must really have it out for me.

"Hey, Warrick." I smile back at him in an effort to hide my true feelings. "Did my parents send you to pick me up?"

"They sure did," he answers. "Your mom told me to take you to pick out a dress for dinner this evening and then get you home. Dinner starts promptly at six, and she doesn't want anyone to be late."

"Okay, I guess she doesn't like the dress I hung up on my closet door for this evening," I answer, shaking my head in defeat. It's a really pretty white dress with lace across the bodice that falls down to my knees. I even had gold sandals to wear with it.

"Sorry, she wants something floor-length for this. She's even making me wear a tux," he fake gags like it's the worst thing in the world. To him, it probably is; he hates getting dressed up. Seeing him in a tux though, is going to do things to me that will torture me all night. "Let's get out of here, Little One."

"Dinner was a disaster," I groan as Warrick escorts me to the club. I couldn't escape dinner fast enough this evening. My father turned it into a business affair, inviting all of the Seraphim and their families to attend. No birthday wishes for me, no cake, just talk of the mating ceremony in two days and the matches everyone was expected to make. They all had high hopes for us. I caught the looks my father tossed my way as a reminder of what was riding on me finding a proper mate.

"I wouldn't call it a disaster," Warrick chuckles. "We all know how your father is. Just take tonight with a grain of salt. You survived dinner, and now you get to go out and celebrate with your friends. That should be worth more to you than your parents not celebrating your birthday."

"Is it though?" I mumble. "For once I just want my parents to recognize me. It seems like the only time they pay attention to me is when I fail at something." I hate feeling like a failure and unwanted. My whole life I've tried to be enough and nothing ever is. No one should go through life the way I have. A parent's job is to love and support us, so why can't mine?

"That's not true, Arabella." Warrick stops and spins to face me, placing his hands on my shoulders. "Please tell me that isn't true."

"I..." Words fail me as I look at him. I've never realized how blue his eyes are. They have a ring of green on the outside that provides more depth to them. I can get lost staring into them if he'd let me.

"Arabella," Warrick shakes me slightly.

"Shit, sorry," I murmur breaking out eye contact. I definitely can't think when looking at him. "It pretty much is true. Rarely does my father speak to me about anything unless it's to remind me of expectations or to scold me for failing something. My mother hardly talks at all. I tried to get her help talking to my dad about the ceremony and she just brushed me off and told me not to fail."

"Why did you never tell me this?" my friend scolds as he stares at me, worry all over his face.

"What good would it do?" I shake my head and try to break away from his hold. He doesn't let me, instead pulling me closer into a hug. "I know you can't stand up to my father. It wouldn't end well and then I would lose you too."

"You could never lose me, Arabella. I will always protect you, whether your father instructs me to or not." He loosens his arms and lets me step back, sensing that I need some space. "I will always look out for you. I wish you had told me what was happening at home though. I would have done something."

"There's nothing you can do we both know that, Warrick," I raise my voice and clench my fists by my side. There's been a line between us for years. When I was younger he was so protective, always watching out for me, assisting me in whatever I needed. As we got older that line became thinner. Heated stares. Long touches. Lingering looks. They happened between both of us or at least I think they have. I may have been misreading the situation but I've watched him before. When guys would come up to speak with me and stand just a smidge too close, Warrick was staring both of us down until the guy walked away. I never called him on it. Maybe I should have but I didn't want to call attention to whatever this is. Just like now. The hug he gave me felt too good like he didn't want to let me go. It was too short for my liking but also too long for anyone who caught us. Warrick is ten years older than me but is under my father's instructions. Nothing can happen, ever.

"I still would have tried," he argues, moving closer to me.

I watch the rise and fall of his chest as he tries to calm himself. I wish I could reach out and calm him the way I want to, but I can't. We can't. It takes all my control to remain in place and remind myself I can't touch him.

"It would be a death sentence," I shake my head and fight my tears. "I'm fine. Everything is fine. Can we just go to the club, please? The girls are waiting on me."

"Fine," he grunts, "but we aren't done with this conversation, Arabella. Not by a long shot."

"It was done before it ever began," I murmur, stepping around him to continue walking to the club. We are only two blocks away, and I can hear the thump of the music, letting it lull me into its safety. In the club, I can dance and drink to forget the worries of the next two days and not be allowed to explore my feelings for Warrick.

"Only you would get so wasted that you can't walk back to the house," Warrick chuckles as he carries me up the front steps of my home. When we reach the front doors, one of the servants opens it so he doesn't need to put me down.

I took advantage of the free alcohol tonight. It was worth it at the time to let go and drown my feelings and my worries. I had a blast with my friends. We danced the night away and laughed until we cried. Warrick waited by the bar all night, keeping watch, which made me act out even more. I knew it was petty, but I couldn't help it. I wanted to push him over the edge. I wanted him to take me and make me his, even if it was just for the night.

"I was celebrating," I laugh while squirming in his arms, trying to get down.

"Will you stop moving around?" he growls, gripping me tighter so I don't fall.

In rebellion, I move one more time before settling down. I'm playing a dangerous game right now. If my father saw me like this, he'd kill me, well maybe not kill me, but he would punish me. Thankfully, it's almost three in the morning, and the halls are empty except for a servant here or there. None of which would report anything to my father. Thank the Divine.

We make it to my room in no time, where Warrick places me on my bed and pulls off my heels before helping me lay down under the covers. "I'll get some pain meds and water for you," he explains before heading to my bathroom. Most people would question how he knows where everything is, but he's spent more time in my suite patching me up than even my closest girlfriends have. "Here," he returns with water and pain meds. "Take them, drink the whole glass, then sleep." He stands beside the bed long enough to watch me swallow the meds before he turns to leave.

"No," I call out softly, trying to keep my voice down in case anyone is in the hallway. "Please stay? I don't want to be alone."

"Bella," he groans, looking in pain at my request. Fuck, maybe I am misreading everything. I hoped to god that I wasn't. It would be so embarrassing but my brain is all muddled with alcohol, so it is very possible that I have.

"No, it's fine," I choke, holding back tears. Placing the glass on the bedside, I roll over and give him my back. I can't watch him leave. Not when I was just so vulnerable with him.

To my surprise, I hear a rustle behind me before Warrick pulls the covers back and scoots me over so he can crawl into bed behind me. I hold still not wanting to scare him away. This is everything I've ever wanted and I don't want to fuck it up, even if my alcohol-muddled brain wants to turn around and cuddle into him.

"Only for a little bit," he mutters, placing a soft kiss against my hair as his arm stretches over my side and pulls me against him.

"Thank you," I smile and snuggle deeper into his hold. Maybe now the nightmares will stay away knowing I'm safe in his arms even if it's only for a couple of hours.

"Sleep, Little One."