Chapter 18

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

I studied Edward as he sat on the patio, facing away from the villa. What was he up to?

Sloan was still trying to find alternate accommodations for him, so I'd been keeping an eye on him from the kitchen. I couldn't believe he'd proposed. The seconds I'd spent waiting for Sloan's response had felt like hours. And then she'd turned him down, despite the fact that he had everything—money, connections, hell, even a title. She'd still said no. Thank fuck.

Why? Because she didn't love him? Had she ever loved him?

I paced back and forth across the kitchen floor like a caged tiger. I hated feeling like this, so out of control.

Did she love me? Did her reaction to seeing Edward mean I had a chance?

Fuck. My head was all over the place. But I had no idea how she felt about what I'd said. I'd poured my heart out to her. Granted, it wasn't the best possible timing, but Hurricane Edward had made landfall and everything had spiraled. Including me.

Oblivious to my inner turmoil, Edward continued to make himself at home. Even now, he'd kicked off his shoes and was headed over to one of the lounge chairs with a drink in hand. I clenched my fists, my blood boiling. I was on the verge of throwing him out when Sloan joined me in the kitchen. Just the sight of her had my pulse slowing to a more normal rate.

"What's wrong?" I asked. I could tell from the hard set of her jaw that she had bad news.

"Thanks to the eclipse, everything is booked. Edward is going to have to stay here for the night until we can get him on a flight home."

I shoved my hands into my pockets, resenting his intrusion even more. "And that's our problem, how?"

"Jackson." She toyed with her necklace. "I can't do this with you. Not right now."

I frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that it's late. I'm tired. And right now, I need you to be my protector."

"That's exactly what I'm trying to do," I said, clenching my fists. "Protect you."

"Tell me something. Do you truly believe Edward is a threat to my safety? Or are you feeling threatened?"

Her comment rankled, partly because it was true. Professionally, my opposition to Edward was motivated by safety. But personally, I was struggling. I was going to have to continue to pretend Sloan meant nothing to me while we were sleeping in the same house as her ex.

She pinched the bridge of her nose. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. But I've tried everything. The staff called every hotel on the island. I tried arranging for a jet crew or a helicopter or a?—"

"Boat," I suggested.

She shook her head. "He's incredibly prone to motion sickness. Will not set foot on a boat."

I chuckled darkly. "I'm surprised that wasn't a deal-breaker for you."

Sloan had always loved sailing. It was in her blood. She needed it like I needed her.

She lifted a shoulder. "It probably should've been."

I stepped closer. "We could sleep on the Athena tonight." I didn't love the idea, especially since it meant a bumpy ride back down to the marina. But I'd do it, if that was what Sloan wanted.

She might have "fired" me, but until I contacted Hudson, she was my principal. She was under my protection. But also…there was no way in hell I was leaving her alone with that prick.

She sagged. "I was really looking forward to sleeping in a bigger space tonight. Besides, why should we have to vacate the villa for him?"

Why did we have to accommodate him at all?

"It's just for one night." It sounded like she was trying to talk herself into it.

Fuck. We were really going to do this, weren't we? I dragged a hand down my face. The thought of spending even one minute with that pretentious…

But then I saw the exhaustion in Sloan's eyes, the desperation, and I put aside my own wishes to do what was best for her. What was one night when she was my forever?

"You're right." I rubbed her arms. "It's only one night."

Her shoulders relaxed. "Thank you."

Edward returned inside, and she stepped out of my touch. I took a breath and shoved down my feelings toward her ex. The mere sight of him set me on edge, but I was going to be polite for Sloan's sake.

"Unfortunately, the island is booked solid," Sloan said. "So, Edward, you're welcome to the couch." She gestured to the sofa.

Edward scoffed. "You're joking, right? He's your employee." He pointed at me. "He should sleep on the couch."

"Jackson ," Sloan said pointedly, "has spent the last week crammed into a small berth because he was protecting me."

I wasn't going to point out the fact that I'd spent last night in her bed, though it was tempting. I merely crossed my arms over my chest and stared at the wall.

"I could protect you." Edward's tone was sincere, and I coughed to cover a laugh. "If you'd let me."

"Edward." Sloan jumped in before I could interject. Or better yet, punch him in the face. "This isn't up for negotiation. Jackson was expecting a bed, and he will have a bed."

His eyes flashed with anger. "And I was expecting to sleep with you."

God, he was petulant, wasn't he? Used to getting everything he wanted. I knew his type. He probably turned on the charm, fooling everyone into believing he was this kind, patient man, when he was actually a huge dick.

I thought back to the photos in her file. The ones of them as a couple. She'd looked happy, but the smile hadn't reached her eyes. And her body language had always been a little closed off from him—just as it was now.

"Unless you'd rather sleep on the beach ," Sloan said in a tone that left no room for argument, "I suggest you find a way to enjoy the couch."

Edward's face was tight, and he looked as if he wasn't going to let it go. My hands were itching for a reason to grab him and haul his ass out. But I was trying to stand back and let Sloan handle this.

He smoothed a hand down his shirt. "Of course, darling. We can spend time together tomorrow."

The fuck they would. Not if I had anything to say about it.

But I didn't. Couldn't. Because right now, I was just the bodyguard. So I tapped into years of training for both the SEALs and with Hudson and maintained a neutral, bored expression.

Sloan ignored his comment and went to her room, leaving me to lock up for the night. I did one more sweep of the perimeter, ignoring Edward's huffs of disbelief and feigned discomfort. I secretly rejoiced in the fact that Sloan had spoken up for me, had chosen me, even if it was something as trivial as a bedroom. Not that I was happy about spending the night alone, but at least I hadn't been relegated to the couch.

I showered then considered going to Sloan, but ultimately decided better of it. It had been a long day, and Sloan had dealt with a lot, both on and off the water. I wanted her to see me as her protector, her refuge. So for now, I'd bide my time. I'd be patient.

I lay awake for a long time. I was sick of this shit. Tired of losing sleep because I was apart from Sloan.

I was finally drifting off when there was a loud crash. I jolted upright and was at the bedroom door in moments.

"Oh fuck," a man grumbled. Edward. "Jesus, Sloan."

I bolted across the hall, through the open door to Sloan's room, my heart racing. "Sloan?" I called, flipping on a light. "Are you okay?"

Edward was balled up on the floor by the foot of the bed. Sloan was against the far wall, arms wrapped around herself.

"Sloan?" I approached slowly, hands out, always with one eye on Edward. "What happened? Did he hurt you?"

She shook her head. "He…" She swallowed hard. "He startled me."

"That's all?" I asked, not breaking her gaze. Desperate to reassure her that I was here and I would never let any harm come to her. Not that she needed my help. She'd handled the situation all on her own.

"Should it truly be surprising to find your fiancé in your bed?" Edward asked.

My lip curled.

"You're not my fiancé," Sloan said. "And I thought I'd made it clear that you were not welcome in my bed, based on the fact that I asked you to sleep on the couch."

"I wonder why that is?" Edward sneered.

He stood, and I turned so my back was to Sloan. Shielding her.

"Because you welcomed me at first," Edward said, and my blood boiled. "But then she said, ‘Jackson.'" He tried to imitate Sloan with a wispy, high-pitched voice as he turned to look at me. "Now, why would she say the name of her bodyguard? Why would she call out for you in bed?"

Sloan placed her palms on my back. A warning? A plea? The fuck if I knew. I just wanted this fucker gone once and for all.

Edward scowled. "I flew across the world to show you how serious I was about us. To propose."

Sloan sighed. "I can appreciate that you came all this way, but you didn't even bother to propose until after I'd ended things. And when you did ask me to marry you, you never once said you loved me, nor did it seem to factor into your reasons for wanting to spend your life with me."

He scoffed. "Would it have even mattered?" He turned his gaze on me, his fists clenched, color rising on his cheeks. "I asked you to move in with me, and instead, you broke it off to fuck someone else." He flicked his hand in my direction. "To fuck him." He spat the words with such disdain.

Sloan straightened. "I ended our relationship because I couldn't imagine a future with you ." Sloan hurled the words at him with the force of a hurricane. "And I only let you stay here for the night because there was literally nowhere else on the island that could accommodate you. Clearly, that was a mistake."

"Can I throw him out now?" I kept my voice low but not low enough that Edward wouldn't hear.

Edward glared at me then took a breath, seeming to compose himself. "Darling, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have" —he looked close to tears. It was a masterful performance, truly— "said that."

"You're right." Sloan blazed with anger. God, she was practically vibrating with it. "You shouldn't have."

"You say you don't envision a future together, but just imagine all that we could accomplish. And I do care about you," he said. "Can't that be enough?"

"It's not enough. At least, not for me," she added quietly.

The question was, would I be enough for her?

I pushed away that tired narrative. It was part of the reason I'd ended things years ago. Because I was afraid I wouldn't be enough.

When my dad was alive, he'd always pushed me to run faster, think smarter, be stronger because he knew I wanted to follow in his footsteps to become a SEAL. He wanted me to succeed. Not because that was what he'd wanted for me, but because he knew I'd wanted it.

After his death, my mom and sister had looked to me for strength and reassurance. I was always trying to live up to the standard set by my dad. I was always trying to be enough for my sister and my mom.

And when I'd started training for the SEALs, it had only gotten worse. The comparisons had been more frequent. I'd lost count of how many times I'd heard about my dad's service record. About how he was a hero.

He was a hero, but no one was perfect. And even though I knew all that, it was impossible not to let it affect me until I became driven by the fear of failure instead of the promise of success. Until I had failed. I'd been discharged from the SEALs, and I'd thought it was the worst moment of my life.

I was a disgrace. A disappointment.

And then I'd met Sloan. And the thought of disappointing her had terrified me. The constant fear that I wasn't enough and never would be.

I knew part of me would always fear letting her down in some way. But I was willing to try. I was willing to silence that voice of fear and focus on what I could give her—the things you couldn't put a price on. And I could definitely give her my protection, my support, my loyalty, and my love.

Edward's cheeks reddened. "You're making a huge mistake."

She lifted a shoulder. "Even if I am, it's my choice to make."

He glared at me then turned his attention back to Sloan. "Think of all I can offer you?—"

"I have everything money can buy." Sloan cut him off. "What I want is love . Loyalty. Devotion. I want passion. I want a love that is all-consuming."

"What you want…is a fantasy. You speak of love. Of passion. But those things can and will fade. I can offer you something more durable. Something you can rely on."

"Stop." She held up a hand. "Just stop. No matter what you say, my answer is still no. And my answer will be the same whether it's tonight, tomorrow, or in a week. Please—" She shook her head. "Just go."

Fucking finally.

I edged closer, forcing him to move toward the door. "You've overstayed your welcome."

He got all huffy, and I grabbed his shoulder, guiding him toward the door. He tried to shake out of my hold. "Release me, you brute."

I remained silent—for Sloan's sake. But Edward wasn't done.

"You think this is over, but it's not," he said to me. Even with him rising to his full height, I had about five inches and fifty pounds of muscle on him.

I tightened my grip on his shoulder. "Sloan said it's over, so it is."

"They'll never accept you," he hissed once we were out of earshot. "Her family. The board." He sneered. "Look at you. You're the help. By definition, you're beneath her."

"Okay, Downton Abbey." I squeezed his shoulder to the point of pain.

"Unhand me," he hissed through his teeth.

"Time to go. Pack up your shit."

"Go where?" he asked. "It's the middle of the night."

"Should've thought of that before you tried to sneak into Sloan's room uninvited." While he grumbled, I texted Huxley Grand security and arranged for an escort off the property.

"I've been sharing Sloan's bed for the past year." He shoved his clothes and things into his bag.

"That's irrelevant now." I was barely holding my anger in check as I waited for him to finish packing. He was lucky I was even giving him the courtesy. I was tempted to throw his shit on the beach outside, but I didn't want it to mar Sloan's view in the morning. "It's over."

He zipped up his designer rollaboard and stood, glancing toward Sloan's room then back to me. "She'll regret this."

"Is that a threat?" I was beyond done with this dickhead.

I'd encountered all sorts of personalities in my work as a bouncer and now as a bodyguard. I'd seen everything from entitled assholes to drunk socialites, but this guy and his attitude were definitely among the worst.

"An observation," he said in a cool tone.

I herded him toward the door and followed him outside so Sloan wouldn't overhear. Once the door was shut, I grabbed his shirt and hauled him up against the wall. His eyes widened and then flooded with fear.

"Let's get one thing straight." I spat the words. "I know countless ways to kill a man without leaving a trace. If you come near Sloan again, if you so much as utter her name with anything other than politeness and respect, I will end you."

He gulped.

"Is that understood?"

He gasped for air, and I released my hold ever so slightly.

"Yes," he choked out. "Yes."

I let go of him, and he nearly fell to the ground. A moment later, a set of small headlights swung our way.

"There's your ride."

I waved at the driver then turned and walked inside, locking the door behind me. Shutting Edward out—of the house, of Sloan's life.

I'd already shot off a quick email to the team at Hudson. I wanted them to dig deeper into Edward and his family, especially now that Sloan and he were broken up.

I had questions for Sloan, but those could wait. The immediate threat had been neutralized, and right now, Sloan was my biggest concern. She always had been, but I hadn't done the best job of showing her that in the past. I'd chosen my job. My duty. My fears. Even Sloan's relationship with Greer.

I took a breath and relaxed my shoulders. The past was in the past. I was focused on our future.

I peeked my head in Sloan's room, but she wasn't there. My heart rate ratcheted up, and I marched into the bathroom. Empty. Fuck . I strode down the hall and discovered her sitting on my bed.

"Hey." I took a seat next to her, wrapping my arm around her. "You okay?"

"I'm…" She shook her head before leaning it against my shoulder. "I don't want to sleep in there tonight."

"You don't have to. Come on." I guided her to lie down then crawled in bed behind her. I wrapped my arms around her, and I could feel her muscles loosen.

"What's going to happen now?" she asked.

"We sleep. You're safe."

She burrowed deeper into my arms, silencing some of my concerns—at least for now. "I always feel safe with you."

I knew Edward was no longer a threat—to Sloan's safety or her heart. But I still had no idea where we stood. For now, I'd settle for being her protector.