NATASHA

Riding on the back of Bear's motorcycle is a longtime dream of mine. As soon as this man crawled under my skin, I would try to catch glimpses of him around town. On those rare occasions when I saw him on his motorcycle, I'd go weak in the knees like a sex-starved maniac. During one particularly steamy summer, I spotted him in a white tank top covered by his vest. So much sweaty, tatted flesh broke me. I've been masturbating to the memory for years.

Now, I have my arms wrapped around his sexy body. The power of the motorcycle rumbles between my legs. I inhale the scent of his leather vest and rich cologne. Between the booze and this fantasy come true, I'm awash in arousal as we pass through his home's security gates.

I climb off with more confidence than my drunken ass should attempt and nearly topple over. Bear sweeps me up into his arms and kisses my lips as we enter the house.

This here with him feels right in a way few things have in my life. That's why I panic and squirm free of his addictive touch.

"I shouldn't forgive you so easily," I mumble and push him away. "When I think of Ollie, I feel like I should hate you."

Bear's expression turns dark, and he backs away. The booze steals my self-control, encouraging me to keep talking.

"I had a special place in my heart just for Ollie. He seemed so lost when we met. I couldn't imagine how it felt to be trapped in his mind and unable to get the very basics of what he needed to be happy. I know you think he was a pity case for me, but I liked hanging around Ollie. He made me laugh. I saw the world differently when I looked through his eyes. We were friends. I sometimes can't believe he's gone. And it kills me to know you're why."

Bear looks like I've cut out his heart. I feel him locking himself away, but I can't stop talking.

"I want so badly to make you wait for my forgiveness, but my resolve began to crumble when I saw you holding my sleeping boy. Hector's so scared about how things changed so suddenly, but he felt safe with you in a way he never felt with his dad. How can my heart stay cold toward you when you're so protective of my babies?"

Bear's face remains stuck on a scowl. I spot how his fists clench and unclench.

I kick off my shoes and climb on his couch to see him eye to eye. All the earlier goofiness from the alcohol is gone. I just feel wracked with guilt and longing.

"I don't want to forgive you, yet there's no one else for me," I say, wringing my hands and sobbing like I did when I learned Ollie was dead. "I missed you so much these last two years. No matter how angry I was or how much I blamed you, I really wanted to see you again. But I knew what we had, the marriage plans, and all that was over. There was no reason to come back. I couldn't want another man. That's why being with Andrew didn't matter. Nothing I did with any man would matter. There was only you, and you were gone."

Wiping my eyes, I reach out and grip his shirt. "But you're here, and we can be together. I feel guilty for how I still want you. What can I do? I've wanted you for too long. Is it so wrong if I'm selfish about this one thing?"

"Why are you asking me? I'm selfish about everything."

"No," I reply and try to yank him closer. Bear refuses to budge at all. "You're giving up your space for my babies," I murmur and wipe my tears before again trying to get him to move closer.

Bear stays put. He likely thinks I'm being overly emotional. I can't get him to move closer, so I step down from the couch and reach for his thick black belt. His hands sweep mine away, and he shakes his head.

"No."

"What does that mean?"

"I'm not in the mood now that we're talking about ugly shit."

"I understand," I say and tug my shirt off and drop my jeans. "I'll just get naked, and we can spoon until it's time for me to go home."

I wiggle free of my panties and turn away to slide out of my bra. Glancing back at Bear standing in the middle of his family room, I find him frowning like I'm his worst enemy.

"You're honestly the hottest man I've ever seen," I say and slide my hand between my legs. "I'm going to need to rub one out really quick, just so I can think straight during the spooning."

I have barely dipped a finger between my folds before Bear is pressed against the back of me. His hand cups mine touching my pussy. In my ear, he growls, "Mine."

"Okay," I murmur and rest back against his hard chest. "Take what you want, Bear."

His lips are instantly against my throat, sucking at the tender flesh. One hand presses against my belly, the other takes the place of my hand. My body gets soft and compliant.

Until my brain snaps on and I freeze up. Leaning away from him, I catch his gaze.

"Now what?" Bear mutters.

"Don't give me hickeys," I warn and eyeball his possessive lips. "My dress doesn't cover my throat, shoulders, or upper chest. I need to be bruise-and-hickey-free for the wedding."

Bear watches me before admitting, "I don't know if I can promise it won't happen. Your skin tastes like candy."

"Once we're married, you can hickey me up from head to toe, but I need to look presentable or else my parents will be disappointed."

Bear's gaze surveys the room while he considers if he cares about my parents' approval. Stroking his jaw, I draw his attention back to me. I understand why Bear struggles with the pressures of my life. There's a wild undercurrent within the Backcountry Kings not found in the Syndicate. The men who wear the club's patch always feel on the verge of losing control.

Bear is a perfect representative of the Backcountry Kings—powerful, barely restrained, and loyal to a fault.

That last part is why his kisses on my throat become more careful. He might not care about appearances, but he very much wants to please his club and me.

"From head to toe," I promise before our lips meet.

Bear's finger strokes my clit, demanding my pleasure. I moan his name and soak in the heat of his body. Bear always runs hot. When I'd get cold at Andrew's house, I'd wrap myself up in a thick blanket and pretend Bear was what kept me warm.

Now, he's the one working my body into a sweaty mess. I whimper his name as he rolls my nipple and plucks at my clit. I come in a subdued way, as if the booze has dulled my nerves.

Or perhaps, I just want more than his fingers can offer. Turning to him, I kiss his lips and reach for his belt. When he lets me undo his jeans, I take advantage of his compliance and slide off his vest. Then, I tug off his shirt. Bear watches me the entire time like I'm about to hurt him. I drag down his jeans, pausing to give his boxers a nuzzle and nibble at his powerful thigh.

Lifting my gaze to meet his, I offer him a smile and slide down his boxers. When I struggle with his boots, Bear drops onto the couch to strip himself down the rest of the way.

I leap onto his lap before he can flee. Kissing him, I slide my wet pussy against his thick, hard cock. Bear wraps me in his arms and holds on as if I'm the one about to run away.

Pressing my body against his, I enjoy how we're in our home rather than a bedroom in the clubhouse. This time together feels real in a way those didn't. Fucking at the clubhouse is random and easy. Women fawn over the bikers, but it's not really personal. Not to the women or the bikers, but it is for women like Siobhan and Yvette who get left behind.

Going rigid, I stare into his eyes and wish the lights were on so I could see them better.

"Good Lord, what now?" Bear grumbles and leans his head back on the couch. "I feel like you're planning to tease me all night."

"Whiner," I say, and he lifts his head and frowns. "I don't want you to cheat on me with a dumb whore with an ethnic slur for a name."

Bear studies me and exhales softly. "If you love me, I'll never want anyone else ever again. Not a dumb whore or a nice girl."

"Not even when I'm middle-aged with a fat ass?"

Bear's hands cup my butt and give the cheeks a squeeze. "Can you love me?"

"I already do, ya silly brute," I murmur and kiss his furrowed brow. "I probably always have."

Bear's expression pinches before he wraps me tighter. "I'll never get my dick wet with any other woman. Losing you again would kill me."

Kissing his temples and nose, I can't deny my heart has always belonged to this man. Once I fell for him, I was a goner.

"I'm keeping you," I whisper as I reach between us and give his cock a loving stroke.

Bear's gaze remains overly intense as if he's searching for a lie. I know he's rattled by my many alcohol-fueled mood swings. However, I feel like we're racing through our many problems tonight like a breakneck therapy.

"In less than two weeks," I whisper and cup his face, "I'm going to ride your dick on this couch as your wife."

Bear grins at my words, clearly ready to skip over the pre-wedding events and get to the good stuff. As our lips meet again, I push aside any thought beyond our bodies coming together.

Hot and wet, my pussy offers no resistance to Bear's impressive size. He stretches my flesh, claiming every inch until I groan and rest my cheek on his shoulder.

"Did I break you?" he asks, sounding a little too worried.

I lift my head and smile at him. "I told you, Bear. I really missed you."

His expression goes from concerned to lovestruck to stony. "Then, never run again."

Kissing him softly, I roll my hips and take him deeper. Bear groans deep in his chest, sounding like a happy beast. I move slowly, drawing out every sensation as I bring him closer to the pleasure he gave me earlier.

"I'm going to suck you after this," I whisper in his ear as I roll my hips with more intensity. "I've long wanted to taste your cock after you fucked me, but I was too shy to say anything."

"Shy," Bear murmurs, chuckling at the thought before my hot pussy sucks hard at his dick and steals his voice.

Bear slides his hands under my ass and guides me to the speed he needs to find relief. I love when he takes control.

The world often intimidates me. Yet, when I'm an extension of this powerful man, the world feels like mine for the taking.