Chapter Thirty-Eight

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

T he phone in her hand was going to break if she didn’t stop gripping it so tightly. Nerves weren’t usually a big issue for her. When you’d seen and done things that would make most people cringe, you learned to let adrenaline steel your resolve to get the job done. She told herself to do that this time, but for the life of her, she was having trouble following through with the norm. With just one push of a key, she would hear Brody on the other end of the line. Something she’d longed for with all her heart for over a decade was within her grasp, and she was hesitating. How insane was that?

Her impatience with herself at an all-time high, Jazz let loose a low growl and punched the key that would connect her with Brody.

The instant the call was answered, her throat closed up. He didn’t say anything, but she knew he was there.

Swallowing hard, she rasped out, “Brody?”

“Hey, Little Mighty.” Though the voice sounded gravelly and slightly husky, she had no trouble recognizing it as her brother’s.

Dropping into a chair behind her, she whispered, “It’s really you?”

“Yeah, it’s me, Jazz.”

“I can’t believe I’m talking to you. It’s been so long.”

“I know, Jazzy. I’m sorry. I’m so damn sorry.”

“I waited for you, and then I had to leave. I knew there was no way you’d be able to find me, but I didn’t know what else to do.”

“You did the right thing, Jazz. It was months before I could get back to the apartment. If you hadn’t left, they would have found you.”

“Where have you been all this time? What are you involved in? Why did you kill Franco Bass? Do you work for the Wren Project?”

“That’s a lot of questions, and I don’t have a lot of time. I can’t stay on the phone too long. Just know that I’m so proud of you, Jazz. You’ve become a force to be reckoned with. But be careful, because those bastards are still looking for you. And even though Kate Walker has done a lot of good things, don’t trust her. She’s hiding things, and I can’t tell whose side she’s on.”

“But, Brody, I want to see you. I?—”

“No, Jazz. You go live your life. Do your thing, Little Mighty. Just know I love you, and Mom and Pop would be so damn proud of you. I know I am.”

Before she could say another word, the call ended, and he was gone. Angry that he’d just hung up, she immediately called back, but an automated voice came on the line to say the number didn’t exist.

She wasn’t sure how long she sat there, just staring at the phone and trying to will it to ring. She told herself she should be happy. Her beloved brother was alive, and while she still had so many questions, just being able to talk to him had been a gift she’d never expected.

He wanted her to let him go—to live her life and forget about him. That wasn’t going to happen. Someway, somehow, she would find him. He was her beloved big brother, and no matter what he was involved with, or what he’d done, she would never give up on him.

“Jazz?”

She looked up into Xavier’s concerned eyes, and everything hit at once. Sobs tore through her chest, and an awful sound erupted from her mouth. Before she could take another breath, Xavier was pulling her into his arms. Burying her face against his neck, Jazz let go of years of grief, fear, and loneliness. Not since she was ten years old and was told that her mother and stepfather were dead had she felt this broken. Almost two decades of sorrow had finally spewed over, and she could no longer contain it.

Xavier held her as if she were something precious. He whispered soothing words that she couldn’t even hear over her bellowing, but they still comforted her. His arms were solid and strong, his chest against her face was both hard and warm, and his scent enveloped her in comfort and familiarity. He was everything she needed.

How long they stayed there, she had no idea, but when she finally looked around, they were in one of the large, overstuffed chairs in the living room, and two steaming cups of what smelled like chamomile tea were sitting on a nearby table.

“Want some tea?” Xavier asked quietly.

“Yeah,” she said gruffly.

It didn’t surprise her when Serena suddenly appeared and prepared the tea just as she knew Jazz liked it. That was one of the many beautiful things about Serena. She knew each of them inside out and used that knowledge to love more deeply. It was one of her many gifts.

Handing Jazz the teacup, she said softly, “Come home with me, Jazz.”

“To your apartment?”

“No, to Wisconsin. It’s simple and easy there. You’ll get the peace you need to deal with all this.”

Simple and easy sounded so tempting. As much as she wanted to say she was fully recovered and one hundred percent ready to deal with everything, she knew she wasn’t. And after today, the idea of peace seemed further away than ever.

“I think that’s a good idea,” Xavier said. “What do you think?”

“I think I’d like that. Thank you, Serena.”

She took Jazz’s hand and squeezed it gently. “My pleasure.” She then glanced over her shoulder and said, “I think there are a few other things you need to learn before we leave.”

Yes, there were, and she had a feeling Kate knew every one of them. Question was, would she tell her?

Xavier pressed a kiss to the top of Jazz’s head, his heart literally breaking for her. In less than an hour, the world she knew had been shattered, her heart broken, and her trust demolished.

In all the years he’d known her and all the shit he’d watched her go through, he had never seen Jazz sob like that. On occasion, he’d seen tears fill her eyes, but she rarely allowed them to fall. She’d once told him that tears came only when there was no hope left. So was that the way she felt now? Hopeless?

He refused to allow that to happen. She had been knocked down again and again, but she would get back up again. He would ensure that.

He let her sip her tea in silence, not pushing her to talk or do anything other than recover from the maelstrom of emotions. If Kate was waiting for her in the conference room, then she could damn well wait.

Finally, she whispered, “He doesn’t want to see me. He told me to go live my life and that he was proud of me. But he doesn’t want to see me.”

Once again, the surge of anger for her brother rose within him. Okay, yeah, the guy had had a tough time. There was no telling what kind of torture the mob had put him through to try to get him to tell them where to find Jazz. He had protected her as much as he could. But it was his call to stay away from her now. He’d obviously known where she was for years and, since he’d been in touch with Kate, had to know how badly Jazz had wanted to find him, and yet, he’d done nothing to make that happen.

Unable to reassure her that she’d ever see her brother again, Xavier just held her closer, giving the only comfort he could.

A couple minutes later, as if she’d gotten a second wind, she straightened in his arms and said, “I need to talk to Kate.”

“Yes, you do.”

She turned her face to his. Though her eyes were bloodshot and swollen from crying, her nose was red and still a little drippy, and her mouth drooped with exhaustion and sadness, he had never loved her more. This was Jazz in her element. Determined, stubborn, and filled with resolve.

“Then let’s go.”

Bounding out of his lap, she took a step forward and then turned back to him. Holding out her hand, she said softly, “You and me, right?”

Engulfing her hand in his, he nodded. “You and me.”

They walked into the conference room together, something he hoped they would do from now on. He wanted to spend a lifetime with her, but they had some demons to put down. And then, he swore, he would bring her brother back to her. He didn’t care if he had to drag him, bloodied, half dead, or screaming, he would bring Brody back to her, no matter what.