CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

REAPER

Wrapping my hand around her throat, I growl as I come inside her.

“Never.”

She responds with an orgasm of her own, and trembles under me, her heart pounding into my chest, as she arches her back and shoves her tits against me. This is how I want us. Connected, as physically close as two people can be, her skin pressing against mine, as she calls my name. There is nothing as beautiful as this, but her questioning if this will last bothers me.

Pulling out of her, the frustration grows until my neck tingles.

“I want you downstairs in ten minutes. We need to talk. And if I stay in this room with you, I’m going to fuck you over and over again.”

She pulls the t-shirt down over her legs, and stares at me with concern.

“Did I do something wrong? You look angry.”

I run a hand through my hair and shake my head.

“Just hurry up,” I say, as I zip my jeans back up.

She isn’t just the first woman I’ve fucked, Bella is my first everything. I’ve never had a relationship with a woman, and I don’t know what’s fucking normal and what’s not, but I didn’t like her questioning whether or not this was fleeting. If she tries to leave me down the line, I am afraid of what I might do to her, because existing without her isn’t an option.

I go into the kitchen and look in the refrigerator to make something for her to eat. The tingling in my neck grows, as my frustration mounts.

“Control it,” I growl at myself .

Killing is how I’ve always handled anger, and I can’t do that now. Not with her. Not ever.

Taking a deep breath, I get cheese from the refrigerator and take it to the counter, grabbing a knife and cutting board.

“There you are,” she says.

I turn to her, and she instinctively steps back as I stare at her, gripping the knife in my hand.

“Nico,” she says, almost like it’s a warning, and she steps further back until she’s standing in the entryway.

Shaking my head, I say, “I don’t stab people.”

“Your eyes, Nico. They’re so dark. I can feel your hostility. You want to kill me. Right now, you’re thinking about it.”

I nod. “The urge is there, but I can control it.”

She steps back further until she’s out of view, and like a punch to the gut, all the air in my lungs disappears, leaving me with the same panicked feeling I had when she had the knife to her throat.

Setting what she perceives as a weapon on the cutting board, I walk calmly to the living room, and find her glancing between the kitchen and the door. The panic intensifies, as I realize she’s considering running from me.

“Baby, come here. Now.”

Staring into my eyes, a tear rolls down her cheek as she walks over to me timidly, everything she’s not. I wrap my arms around her and pull her tight against me, as I inhale the calming scent of her hair. I’m more fucked up than I realized.

“Fuck. I’m sorry. I only know one way to handle anger and frustration.”

Placing her arms around my back, she presses her face into my bare chest, and says, “That’s the first time I’ve been truly afraid of you, Nico. I can’t live like that. You have to find a new way of dealing with things. I’ll cut the fucking tracker out of my ass myself, and you’ll never see me again. ”

If she were any other woman, I wouldn’t believe her. My living dead girl would do something crazy like that without batting an eye. And she’s right, constant fear that I’ll kill her isn’t something that should be part of the equation.

“I’ll do better. I don’t know how, but I will.”

Tilting her head back, her lashes flutter as she raises her gaze to mine.

“I’m not the enemy, Nico. There will be times I make you mad, or upset you, but I’m always on your side.”

Reaching up, she presses her hand to my face, while I lean down and press my forehead to hers.

“This is not temporary. It’s permanent. Bella, if you leave me, I’ll search for you, and either find you or die trying. That’s not a threat, it’s a promise. You’ve become my sole reason for breathing. If you go, please plunge the fucking knife into my chest again before you do, because I refuse to exist without you.”

Sliding her hand from my face, her fingers travel down my chest, causing an entirely different type of tingling, as she whispers, “What now?”

I smirk at her.

“Now, you’re going to eat. I was making you grilled cheese, because it’s either that or cereal, because I haven’t done any shopping.”

She tosses her head back and laughs.

“Grilled cheese happens to be my favorite.”

Taking her hand, I pull her back to the kitchen.

“Have a seat on the island.”

I go back to slicing the cheese, and preheating the frying pan, while she watches me.

“How old are you?” She asks quietly.

“Twenty-six.”

As I’m cooking our food, she continues asking me questions.

“Who was the man at the graveyard that first night? ”

I turn to her with a grin. “My brother, Bones.”

Her face shows a knowing expression, as her mouth forms a perfect ‘O’.

“I expected him to find me and kill me, after what I did.”

“He wanted to,” I say, as I place the sandwiches on two plates, turn the stove off, and bring the food to the island.

“And now?”

Taking a seat across from her, I tell her what she wants to know.

“He knows you’re not to be touched.”

I point to the sandwiches.

“Eat.”

She picks up her sandwich and takes a bite, and I do the same. I fucking love seeing her like this. It’s more than I expected. I knew seeing her naked, with my cock inside her, would be perfect, but watching her eat in my house like this, not chained up, it’s far more exciting than it probably should be. I’ve never had fantasies about sharing my life with a woman, but with her, I want to give her the entire world.

“What?” she asks with pink cheeks, after realizing I’m staring at her.

“I like this normalcy. Having you here with me.”

She arches an eyebrow at me.

“Careful, people will think Reaper Bonetti has gone soft.”

I chuckle loudly.

“Let’s get you some clothes, and then I’ll take you for a stroll, to prove that I am not.”