Chapter 19

CHAPTER NINETEEN

I 'm here, but I don't want to be. I can feel myself fading more day by day, and I know Rylee and the guys are worried. Hell, I am too, but I don't know how to get out of this funk. I have a secret, and it's so dumb, but I don't want to talk to anyone about it.

Well, besides Cobbler. She knows all of my trauma and demons. She's another reason I don't want to be here. I'd rather stay home, in bed with her and Peaches. But I can't do that to Colt or the team.

I swear the Black Widows are cursed or something. Maybe Missi really is a witch and she hexed us after she was kicked off the team.

Rylee runs her fingers through my hair as I continue to watch the yellow lines on the road. She's chatting with Serenity and they are laughing. I wish I could push through this sadness and join in with her.

This is her first competition, we should be having fun, but I can't get out of this funk.

I thought, after I left home, I would be able to put the past aside and move on. Why did they have to contact me now? Like I give a shit that the man who abused me for years is dying.

What am I supposed to do? Stand vigil by his bedside and wait until he takes the final breath of his pitiful life?

Pulling my blanket tighter, I cuddle into it. I was surprised to find out that the guys had grabbed me some of my comfort items, but then again, they are always there for me.

"Why don't you take a nap, baby?" Rylee suggests and I nod. I really am exhausted, and she keeps the nightmares away.

The driver talking over the sound system pulls me out of a really good dream. Rylee and I were at an ice cream shop, trying all sorts of flavors. I had just bent her over the cooler…

"Welcome to Las Vegas. The weather is a cool one hundred and ten degrees," the guy jokes and Teo groans.

"So, basically, we are going to be sweating our balls off during practice and the competition," he grumbles and Colt huffs, then laughs.

"Actually, due to the girl passing out last year, we are going to be inside an air conditioned arena."

"Oh, well, that will be nice, but I still want some pool time, Ryles," Ren says and Rylee nods.

"Yes, we should go pool jumping. I saw on TikTok that some of the pools on the strip have crazy features."

Len laughs, shaking his head.

My dick perks up at the thought of my Cherry in a bikini, and she notices since her hand is on my thigh. Giving me a saucy smile, she grabs it and I bite my bottom lip, holding back my groan.

I wish we had time to fool around, but I can see we're about to pull into the arena's parking.

"To be continued," I whisper against her lips before kissing her. She makes my heart race, and I don't want to move away from her warmth right now.

She keeps the darkness away, even for just a moment, making me feel like I can actually breathe.

"Later," she says, smiling, and I nod.

Teo laughs when she stands, moving along the aisle to get off the bus. "You had six hours with her and all you did was snore and drool. You snooze, you lose, dude."

Grumbling, I hand Lennox my things and he puts them into a bag before moving off the bus.

Glancing out of the window, I groan. I have always loved cheer, but this looks like a pom pom threw up all over the place.

Girls are running in formation in their tiny matching workout clothes, while other teams are wearing full uniforms.

Thankfully, because of the long drive, we were allowed to wear our practice sweats, but now that we're leaving the air conditioned bus, I'm starting to regret it.

"This is insane," Rylee shouts as we walk up to the convention center that's hosting Regionals.

"This is nothing, baby girl, just wait for Nationals. It has double the amount of teams competing," I say, putting my arm over her shoulder, tucking her into my side, where she's a perfect fit. "And if we make it to Worlds, there's even more."

A lady in a bright yellow jacket runs up to us and shoves a clipboard with a folder at Colton.

"Black Widows? Here is your itinerary and room information," she says before leaving us to talk to some other teams.

"I say we check in, drop our bags off, then do a quick rehearsal. I know. I know. Don't give me any attitude. We need to practice on the mats here. After that, you are all free to roam and explore, but no drinking, and curfew is at nine!" Colton shouts, and a few of the girls cheer while Ursula whines.

"Come on, baby," Teo says, grabbing Cherry's hand and taking her from me. Len stays beside me and I sigh.

"Ahhh, I love competing!" Fatima squeals, then does a cartwheel before running after the others.

I snort, watching her excitement, and Len nudges me with his arm. "Buck up, bro, we've got this shit in the bag!"

"I know we can't stay long, but I want to come back here one day. I want to explore all the casinos and go to the aquarium," Rylee says as we walk along the strip.

The sun is setting and all the lights are turning on. We are currently standing in front of Caesar's Palace.

We had some good food, but when I tried to buy Rylee a purse at one of the designer stores, she got really mad at me, and I don't know why.

"We can make a trip down here this summer," Colt says, offering her his hand when they begin walking again.

"How come he's allowed to buy her some gourmet chocolate and a slice of cheesecake, but I take her into a Prada store and get screamed at?" I ask Teo, and he laughs.

"Because Rylee isn't materialistic. She doesn't need a designer purse," he mutters and I sigh.

"I have more money than I can spend in five lifetimes, I don't understand why I can't spoil the people I love," I grumble.

"Hey, I'll take a handout, if you're offering." Teo winks, nudging my arm.

I scoff, "Fuck off!"

I know he's just being an ass, but I do love the fucker, and he managed to make me smile, which is a chore these days.

Following Colt and Rylee, we talk bullshit and laugh about some of the things the people we pass are wearing.

It's not long until we are back at the hotel, and I'm laying in bed, alone. Colton is my roommate, and I'm tempted to ask him to cuddle.

I don't want to make shit weird, but we have a long day tomorrow and I need sleep.

I clear my throat to ask him, and it's like he already knows.

Sighing, Colton rolls off his bed and slides in under the covers beside me.

My throat gets choked up.

"If I wake up to your dick saying hello to my ass, I will nut punch you," he mumbles and I laugh.

Laying my hand flat beside his, I close my eyes and take some deep breaths.

"Thanks, Colt."

Shit, shit, shit! I'm late, how can I be late?! Fuck.

I scramble out of bed and rush over to my bag. Digging through it, I toss all its contents onto the ground until I find my uniform. Damn it, I didn't shower. Screw it, I don't have time. We're up any minute now.

Why didn't anyone wake me? Have they not noticed I'm not there? I'm going to beat their asses for this.

Stripping out of my sleep stuff, I quickly throw on my uniform and groan when I see what a mess my hair is. It will take a good half an hour to brush this out before I can even style it.

Grabbing a hair tie off the dresser, I quickly pull it up into a sloppy pony, because that's the best I can do right now, and clip my bow into place. I use half a bottle of hairspray, hoping no one gets close enough to see my hot mess hair.

I'm out of the door and running through the hotel, trying to order an Uber. "No," I groan when I see that no one can pick me up for at least a half hour.

I don't have time, so when I see someone getting out of a cab, I rush over and slip inside.

"What the hell?" The man looks at me with wide eyes.

"I need to get to The Mirage. I'll pay you whatever you want."

He glares at me, then huffs. Thankfully, he doesn't ask me to get out and we take off. Every second that ticks by, I feel more and more like I'm going to be sick. You would think with Colton riding our asses for everything to be perfect, they would at least make sure I'm there!

We pull up to The Mirage, and I'm out of the cab the second the car stops. "Hey. You have to pay me."

"Shit," I hiss, realizing I didn't bring my wallet or even my phone. "Ah, my name is Rylee Moore. Look me up on Insta. I'll paypal you the money. I'm sorry, I gotta go!"

I feel horrible as I turn around and leave the guy hanging, but I need to get inside.

"Sorry. No ticket, no entry." Someone stops me as I try to rush through the door.

"You're kidding me, right?!" I blink at the guy. "I'm one of the cheerleaders."

"Now, introducing the Solidarity Academy Black Widows!" I hear my team being announced and my stomach drops. "Fuck."

Not giving a single shit, I push past the guy and take off running into the arena. I don't have time to go backstage, so I go through the stands, rushing down the stairs.

The music starts. "No!" I shout as I make it to the bottom of the steps. And then I stand there, gaping in horror. "What the fuck?" I whisper.

The music playing isn't the song we picked for our routine. It's… the I'm Sexy, I'm Cute song from Bring It On .

When Alex comes onto the mats, flipping out, I'm beyond confused. And it's amplified when I see Trevor, too. It's only my guys and Alex up there. I look around, wondering where the rest of the team is?

"What the hell are they wearing?" I whisper. They're in skirts and damn crop-tops, for fuck's sake.

Okay, so they're not that bad. Oddly, they're pretty good. Alex and Trevor, I mean, because I already know the other guys can dance.

As they keep going, it gets more and more horrifying. It's like a train wreck. I can't look away.

It gets to the roll call part of the song and my brows furrow when they don't say their names, but they shout out the names of the characters from the movie.

When they're done, they stand there panting in a pose, waiting for the room to cheer. But nobody does. Everyone starts booing, like it was the worst thing they've ever seen.

Then I feel something hit me on the back of the head with a wet thud. "Ouch!" I curse, as I reach behind my head to feel what it was. "Gross," I whimper when I touch something slimy and bring my hand back around. "Is that a tomato?"

The guys shout as the whole room starts throwing rotten food at them. I duck and rush toward them. "Colton!" I shout. "Lennox, Mateo, Trevor."

Just as I make it onto the mat, and the guys look over at me, everything goes black.

I bolt up out of bed, chest heaving, pulse racing, as my mind slowly comes back to consciousness. Blinking, I realize that I'm not at the competition, I'm still in my hotel room. I look over to the other bed and find Serenity is passed out, lightly snoring.

"Thank God it was just a dream," I whisper to myself, placing my hand over my pounding heart. But what the hell kind of dream was that?

Shaking my head, I flop back on the pillow. The dream was weird as hell, but I'm not going to lie, the more I think about it, the more I realize it's funny as fuck. And maybe slightly traumatizing. I've got to tell the guys about it in the morning.

When I wake again, it's to a pillow being smashed into my face.

"What the hell?!" I groan.

"Wake up, bitch. It's competition day!" Serenity's overly excited voice has me groaning and rolling over, pulling the blanket up, covering my head. I'm not a morning person.

"Nope." She grabs the blanket and yanks it down.

"You better watch yourself, Ren," I huff, shooting her a glare. "I know where you sleep."

"You do. But no one's sleeping right now. Let's get our makeup and hair out of the way, then we can go grab something small to eat."

"Fine," I grumble, sitting up and grabbing my phone. "I'll text the guys to let them know we will meet them down there. Lucky asses don't need to spend all that time getting ready. They can roll out of bed and be good to go. We cannot," I say, gesturing to myself, as I probably look like a hot mess right now.

"Speak for yourself." She winks. "I look like a model, right from the moment I open my eyes."

We both pause for a second before bursting out laughing, knowing damn well that's bullshit. Girl looks worse than me in the morning most times.

After brushing my teeth and taking a quick shower, I change into my uniform, and we head over to Felicia and Fatima's room to get ready.

It takes an hour to do our hair and makeup, but by the time we're done, we look amazing.

"We're so damn cute," Serenity says, snapping a photo of us all.

"We are. But this cute ass wants food," I grumble, hopping off the stool.

We head down to the hotel lobby where we find the guys waiting. I spot them all sitting at the slot machines.

Smiling, I shake my head. "You know, it's just a waste of money. The likelihood of you winning anything is low. You're lucky if you make back the money you put in."

"Your lack of faith in me wounds me, baby." Mateo chuckles as he pulls out a voucher that says he won five hundred dollars.

"What the hell?!" I snatch it from him. "This sucks. I can't even play."

"Sorry, babe." Mateo winks, snatching it back. "I'll buy you something pretty with it."

I roll my eyes and move over to Lennox. "What about you? Did you win anything?"

Lennox gives me a guilty look. "Maybe?"

"You too." I pout. "How much?"

"Ahh. I don't wanna say." He bites his lip.

"It's bullshit, really," Donny grumbles, slapping his buttons a little too hard.

I can see the dark circles under his eyes and my heart hurts. He's not doing so good, and I'm really starting to worry that if we don't get him help soon, it's only going to get worse.

I can only do so much. Though I'll always be by his side, for this, I'm not enough, and that's okay. I just want him to get better and go back to the old silly Donny that I miss so much.

"He's fucking rich. It's Colton who should be winning that money. He doesn't need ten grand."

"Ten grand?!" My eyes practically bug out of my head as I turn to Lennox.

"I'm not keeping the money," Lennox grumbles. "And yes, I already offered it to Colton, but he turned me down."

"I won my own money, thanks," Colton grumbles.

"I know, I know." Lennox rolls his eyes. "Anyway, I'm going to donate half to the rec center, and the other half to the animal shelter."

"Oh." My heart melts. "That's actually really amazing." I lean in and give Lennox a kiss. "So, you won too?" I ask Colton.

"Yup." He grins, not even feeling bad about my little pity party. "Enough that I don't need to look for another job until next semester."

"That's amazing." I grin, feeling excited and happy for him. "How about you, baby?" I ask Donny.

"These things are a fucking scam." Donny gets to his feet. "I'm getting something to eat."

My heart sinks when he turns away and walks toward the little coffee shop. I look at the guys and we all share a look. They see it too.

I just hope we can get through this competition. The moment we get back home, we're getting him help.