Chapter 12

CHAPTER 12

Tracy Judd

I couldn't stop crying.

It was the most bizarre thing. It was a quiet and calm cryfest, but I couldn't stop to save my life. I just sat there in Daddy's truck and wept silently, sniffled a whole lot, and processed the night. And every now and then, a memory struck, causing the next round of tears.

Daddy was my anchor. He kept me close, drove fairly slowly, and kissed the top of my head a lot.

"It's like…" I stifled a sob and screwed my eyes shut for a moment. "Getting whipped fifty times, but you register each strike much later."

"Because it's actually more than fifty strikes," Daddy explained patiently. "It's been an evening with constant movement, discomfort, tripping, mindfucking—you can't process everything when it happens, so it comes out afterward."

Yeah. I wept like a freaking baby, and that was exactly what it was.

I was also realizing that I'd been scared for much longer than I'd originally thought. My brain had just protected me from feeling it when the stakes were so high. And now…ugh.

Plus, it'd fucked with my head to see Justin cry before we'd left Ryan's property. He never cried.

Everyone had essentially sagged into heaps of relief and emotions when it was over, and we hadn't seen it coming. Maybe Kit. He'd clearly done this many times before. Angel, too. Even so, they'd fallen apart.

A massive weight had lifted from my shoulders, and I guessed I was crying it off.

Oh my gosh, I looked like a bloody mess! Literally! I hadn't seen my reflection when Daddy had ushered me into the shower, but now I couldn't look away. My face and neck had little cuts and scrapes everywhere.

Daddy got down on one knee to drag the towel gently over my legs, and I saw redness and budding bruises along my thighs and torso.

"Can we take pictures of the marks, Daddy?" I croaked.

He smiled up at me and dried my junk. "We'll do that tomorrow and the day after when the colors come out."

Oh yeah, good idea.

I sniffled and wiped my nose, and I waited till he was ready for my next step in the aftercare process. He'd asked me some stuff, like what I needed, and I honestly hadn't been able to tell him. Aside from closeness. I wanted him nearby the whole time. But he seemed to be winging it very well.

"Time to march this cute butt to bed," he said. "But you can wait in the doorway while I grab some essentials."

Essentials were essential. I didn't know what he was referring to, and I was content to find out whenever.

He enveloped me in the biggest towel, while he kept his wrapped around his hips, and I watched him duck into the kitchen for a moment.

I sniffled and scratched my head—ouch, sore! Like a Kinder surprise for masochists. I didn't know what I was getting until I came upon a sore spot or a bruise.

"Do you need help, Daddy?" I asked.

"No, you just wait there, little one."

Okidoke.

He rummaged around for a couple minutes more, and when he reemerged, I felt my eyes light up. He'd made an ice cream sundae! Holy crap, it looked so delicious. Chocolate, strawberry, crushed hazelnuts—I assumed, because it was what I had—chocolate syrup, half a banana, and little wafers. He must've bought those.

"I'm thinkin' dessert comes first during aftercare," he said. "I wanna get your sugars up, and you need something to do while I inspect your body."

Oh, I could get used to this.

"But what do you need for aftercare?" I asked, following him into the bedroom.

"This is my aftercare," he replied. He pulled down the duvet and patted the mattress.

I jumped right in!

"Just being with you, all the cuddles, taking care of you…" He smiled as I got settled, and he extended the ice cream bowl and a spoon.

"Thank you so much, Sir." I immediately scooped up some chocolate ice cream with lots of nuts. "But so we're clear, I wanna take care of you too."

He smirked faintly and joined me in bed with his bag. "You can rub my left leg tomorrow. I don't know what you did, but it's hurting like a bitch. Oh, and my nose , you little shit. That came outta nowhere."

I giggled around a mouthful of ice cream.

His nose looked fine. I hadn't broken it, at least!

Maybe next time. Because there had to be a next time.

With a bottle of lotion in his grasp, he leaned in to give me a smooch, and then he eyed the ice cream with great interest.

I beamed and offered him a spoon, and he growled playfully and closed his lips around it.

God, he made my heart soar.

And what came next… Pure heaven. He gathered the pillows behind me so I could lean back, and then he spent a lot of time rubbing aloe into my skin. We talked about the event; he wanted to know if I'd been close to safewording at any point, what had scared me the most, what'd fucked with my head the most, and if there'd been anything I didn't wanna do again.

I couldn't say I'd been close to safewording, but in retrospect, I was glad we hadn't gone further for my first time. The pain, I could handle fine. The mindfucking, however… Whoosh! It'd snuck up on me. All of a sudden, I'd been confused and frazzled and overwhelmed—and I made sure to mention I wanted much more of this in our future. Because the relief came after the excitement. When it was over and I got to cry it out and let go of all the adultisms and filters and tension. It was akin to the relief of the release after a beating. Only, now I was exhausted too. I felt like I could sleep for days!

"We'll make sure you rest up," he said, kneading my thigh. He brushed against my dick, but he did nothing further. Hmpf. I kind of wanted to get dirty now. "I was thinking—you don't have the same sweet deal I do at work. I don't work weekends."

"I'll make sure to include that in my contract if I ever get a Michelin star," I quipped.

He chuckled. "Brat."

Totally! Every day and twice on Sunday.

"My point …" he went on, "I'll come in tomorrow and help you. It'll cut your workload in half, and I get to spend more time with my boy."

I swallowed and felt things fluttering inside my tummy. He was just…so kind and generous and amazing. Who'd known?! Underneath that grumpy, huffy, demanding chef was a super-caring Daddy who took care of me like he was born to do it.

I had to up my game. He couldn't keep skirting my wish to give back.

One thing I could say, though. "I'm gonna fall in love with you embarrassingly quickly, Griffin."

His gaze snapped to mine, his hands faltering in their movements on my thigh. He sure hadn't seen that coming.

I smiled and leaned forward, and I kissed the surprise off his face.

He kissed me back tentatively, and then a little hungrier, until he cupped my cheek and broke away.

"You're already such an important part of my life that I have no doubt I'll beat you to the punch," he murmured.

"Said the Sadist," I snickered. "But no way. I'll beat you …to it."

He shook his head and captured my mouth in another kiss. "There's another reason I wanna go into work with you tomorrow. I wanna see Adam's face when you come in all scratched up."

Oh shoot! I hadn't even thought about that. Oh my God, that could lead to some misunderstandings. Good thing Adam wasn't a complete stranger to kink. After all, Mister Jameson was his younger brother.

I was just gonna come out and say it. Daddy slowly, slowly, slowly pushing inside my bottom was the best way to wake up in the morning ever. I squirmed and felt a rain of little pains reminding me of last night, and it made me shiver and wince at the same time.

I hugged my stuffie a little harder and yawned into it. Meanwhile, Daddy let out a long breath of pleasure against my neck, and he gripped my hip as he buried himself all the way in.

His chest hair tickled my back until he pressed himself closer to me, and that right there, with his body lined up perfectly with mine, was the stuff.

He'd gone extra generous with the oil this morning, so our slow fuck came with a delectable sensation when he forced himself in with more ease. It lulled me into a sleepy-horny state where I just wanted to lie here and take his cock all day.

A traitorous whimper slipped out as he lifted my leg for a deeper reach, and he pressed his lips to my neck.

"Morning, little one. Daddy woke up hungry and couldn't help himself."

" Hnnngh. " I pushed back against him and reveled in the hurty moments. Like when he grabbed at me a little harder and happened to place his fingers right over a bruise. "Is it cuz my bottom is cute and tight?"

He groaned under his breath and picked up the pace. "Irresistibly." His breaths came out faster, and he dropped the most sensual, openmouthed kisses on my skin. "I won't be too long. We have plans."

Ew, I didn't like that word right now!

"What kind of plans?" I pushed myself up a bit and tried to peer behind me. I wanted to see his big cock sliding in and out of me.

But Daddy evidently had something else in mind. He pulled out and flattened me against the mattress, and I sucked in a breath. My legs went around his hips, automatically lifting my butt off the sheets a little, and then he shoved his cock deep inside me.

I gasped at the sharp pain that bolted through me, and I latched on, my fingers digging into his biceps.

"Fuck, that's it," he exhaled. "We're goin' over to Madigan and Abel's for breakfast."

Yeah, okay, we could discuss that later.

I pulled him down on me, and I grabbed at his face, needing his mouth on mine.

Oh my God, that feels so good.

The slow fuck was slow no more!

We moaned and kissed greedily, and I couldn't help but reach for my cock. He didn't stop me, though, so it must be allowed.

"I love the way you fuck me," I whimpered.

He hummed into a tongue-teasing kiss that made my toes curl, and then he removed my hand so he could take over. He was just so passionate and all in . He broke the kiss and peered down between us, so I had to lift my head. I wanted to see too.

He stroked me quickly, keeping with the pace he fucked me, and I stared hungrily.

"You have the cutest fucking cock, baby boy."

I flushed and squirmed. How did he know exactly what to say to turn me into a needy little mess? I mean, I was…um, proportionate…? But next to him, every part of me was small, and that was exactly how I wanted to feel. A push of that tiny humiliation button did the trick. I suddenly existed to pleasure him, to be his little baby boy, and to take as many releases as Daddy wanted to fuck into me.

We met in another deep kiss, and he did something that caused a rush of pleasure to push me right to the edge of the cliff. It was how he twisted his hand and how he ground himself deeper in my ass, and I could no longer control my breathing. Oh fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. The sensations exploded within me. I started trembling and?—

"You're right there," he whispered, out of breath. "Let go. Make a mess all over yourself."

Oh God.

I was so done. I screwed my eyes shut and dug my head back into the pillow, and I didn't stand a chance. Before I knew it, I imploded with euphoria, and ropes of come shot out of my cock. At the same time, Daddy fucked me brutally hard and fast, drowning me in pleasure and pain.

Make this my forever, please.

It was a bummer that Justin and Angel didn't show up with their Owners, but I wasn't all too surprised either. They had kids and whatnot. At least I got to see Abel and Kit again!

Madigan and Abel had ordered from a sandwich place in the marina, close to where they lived, and they had everything set up on the dining room table when we showed up.

"Hi, everyone!" I waved.

They had a lovely house, very coastal-style, like New England, with an ocean view and everything.

"Look at our bruised-up boys." Daddy was way too happy. "That's how we want you, innit?"

Kit huffed and snuck behind a grinning Colt.

"You sound like Colt," Lucas noted.

"I'll take that as a compliment," Daddy chuckled. "We had great fun last night."

"Abso-fucking-lutely." Colt smiled and ruffled Kit's hair, to which he scowled and smoothed back his wavy hair again. Or he tried.

Madigan set a pitcher of orange juice and coffee on the table. "Let's dig in, gentlemen. There's egg, cheese, and Italian sausage on croissant, salmon and cream cheese on pumpernickel for my NHL player who isn't allowed to eat white bread at the moment, and ham, cheese, tomato, and Dijon on plain bagel."

Yum .

"We were just talkin' about a repeat of last night before y'all showed up," Colt went on and sat down. "Madigan and Abel are already honorary members in our community outside DC, and you and Tracy are more than welcome to join us if you're ever in the area."

I gasped and looked up at Daddy. "That would be so fun, wouldn't it?"

He kissed my temple. "Sounds like a fantastic vacation. Maybe after the holidays?"

"We gotta make it happen," Kit urged. "I'll send you an invite to join our online community too, Tracy."

"Thank you." I smiled widely and sat down next to Daddy. Crap, this felt almost as good as last night. I'd been hoping to make more friends and spend time with them without being a third wheel.

But I never could've dreamed of hitting the jackpot like I had with Griffin.

It was going to take me ages to process my happiness.

Also, it meant a lot to me that Daddy seemed to get along so well with the people in our community—and now Kit, Colt, and Lucas too. Granted, Daddy had been a member of our community for longer than I had, but I'd had partners who weren't interested in being social at all. And when it came to kink, that mattered. Because I wanted the big events and the get-togethers.

I smiled goofily as he unwrapped a sandwich for me, and he dipped down and kissed my nose.

"Is this a good time for me to say I told you so?" Abel asked casually. "Because I freaking told you you'd get along with Mister Griffin."

I let out a huff, but that was about all the protesting I could manage. I mean, he'd been right. Super right.

Daddy spoke up before I could. "Just this once, I'll bow to your genius, Abel."

That made Abel sit up straighter, and he looked proud. "Okay, I'm waiting, Sir. Bow."

I laughed—so did Kit and Madigan.

"We Sadists bow internally," Colt supplied. "Everyone knows that."

Daddy nodded and pointed his sandwich in Colt's direction in a silent exactly .

Typical Sadists!

"Can we go to your place tonight?" I asked.

Daddy pulled into his parking space behind the restaurant. "Yeah, of course. We'll stop by your place and pack a bag after work."

Fist pump!

"I can't wait to see it," I admitted and unbuckled my seat belt. "Do you have a fireplace? A woodstove?"

"Yes to both."

Amazing! I jumped out of the truck. "I'm gonna make you the best biscuits you've ever had. My grandpa taught me—and he always used a woodstove."

Daddy smiled to himself, and we shut the doors before meeting up behind the truck, where he pulled me close and kissed the top of my head.

"I'm looking forward to it."

Me too. Also, the parking lot smelled delicious, and we knew what that meant. Adam was working his brisket magic on the other side of the outdoor seating area that'd closed for the season.

We headed into the restaurant, or the kitchen, and discovered we were first. But we could hear the echoes of Adam's and Alessia's voices from upstairs, so they must be on their way down. Their son was evidently joining us too, because his little voice carried in the stairwell.

"I'll go change," Daddy said.

"Be right there. I'm just gonna log in." I wanted to see how many reservations we had today—and how many dietary restrictions.

I logged in to the computer and hummed to myself, and I gave myself a stern reminder to switch from Daddy to Griffin. At least when I spoke! I wasn't sure I could change the way I thought about him.

I'd noticed how naturally we flowed in and out of our dynamic, blurring the lines here and there, and I loved it. I wanted our relationship fluid. Some people had specific times for kink, but given how I reacted to everything Daddy did, I wasn't sure I could chop up our day into slots for this and that. Work created enough of a barrier.

Hmpf. Four vegans tonight. My brother's wife was a vegan, and I adored her—possibly because she was the first to say something like, "Um, why would a vegan go to a steakhouse? Meat is in the name!"

We did not serve any fake meat here, but we did have some alternatives. Adam made a good sandwich with grilled eggplant, roasted onion, and a creole aioli that didn't have eggs in it. That was about all for the entrees, though! Not even our zucchini fries were vegan. Tonight's vegan party would have to order up on the grilled veggies and regular fries.

I scratched the side of my head. Two gluten-free, one with severe peanut allergy.

Okay, we were good to go!

Just in time for Adam to kick open the door and carry in a crying toddler.

"Hi, Chef!" I walked over to them and kidnapped Nicky, positioning him on my hip. "What's the matter, little dude? Why're you crying?"

"We ran out of bread upstairs, so clearly the world is coming to an end," Adam said. "What the fuck happened to your face? Please tell me you got a cat."

I laughed and made a funny face at Nicky. "We can pretend I got a cat."

Daddy returned from the changing room at the same time as Alessia joined us.

"Oh! I didn't know you were coming in today, Griffin." She was happy to see him, albeit confused.

"Is Nicky running back of house with me today?" I asked.

I was completely ignored, because Adam spun around to face Daddy, and Alessia rushed forward and asked me what'd happened.

"Stop looking at me like that, man," Daddy bitched. "I gave him ice cream after I beat him."

I cracked up, hard, and Alessia was quicker to get it than her hubby.

" Dio —you two don't mess around," she laughed softly. "This was the party Jameson and Justin were at too? I talked to Lola this morning."

"Yeah, it was fun." I smiled.

Adam shook his head and turned his ball cap around backward. "At least Tracy got some punches in too. Jesus Christ." He gave us both pointed looks. "If anyone asks, y'all had a fight with the pig that's currently in the smoker outside."

Daddy and I exchanged a smirk.

Flawless cover story!

That evening, I got another glimpse into my future with Daddy, and it kept a smile on my face until my jaw was aching. It was ridiculous, wasn't it? But it couldn't be helped. We assisted each other in the kitchen while Adam manned the grill out front, and our shared workload gave us some moments to be cheesy together. Like when Daddy came over to me, hugged me from behind, and said he couldn't wait to wake up with me in his bed.

Or when we took our meal break and talked about maybe looking at boats next spring. Daddy missed having a boat, and it was my dream to have one.

All the while…we loved work too, so we didn't have to explain ourselves when we got too distracted by our tasks. We cooked because it was our passion, and we tended to live in our heads when we were busy. To me, it was just a relief to know he was the exact same.

"And the salad?" Lee asked.

"The sherry vinaigrette," I said, grabbing two plates. Then I pushed open the door with my butt and backed out of the kitchen. "The six-ounce sampler for the mac and cheese and crispy brussels sprouts, and brisket for the fried pickles and mash." I left the plates next to Adam's station, and he acknowledged me with a nod, busy flipping steaks.

Griffin had come out to help him, 'cause Adam's usual weekend helper, a chef I wasn't particularly fond of, hadn't felt well. I mean, he was a decent chef, but he didn't love his job. You could always tell if a chef worked to pay the bills or because he lived to cook—and obviously pay the bills too.

"You know you gotta set up interviews, right?" I pressed.

"I put Alessia on it," he replied.

"You know who you should call?" Daddy said. "Duane. He just moved to the West Coast after his divorce."

"Are you fucking serious?" Adam asked incredulously. "Man, he'd be great. And he'd fit in with us."

I didn't know who Duane was, but I was all for us finding a more permanent solution. We needed a lunch chef who could think for himself and someone who could help Adam on the weekends. Although…I had a feeling Griffin would pick up extra shifts now.

Adam and Alessia loved working weekends and preferred taking their breaks in the middle of the week. Obviously, they were off some weekends too, and that was kind of how I'd first started working with Griffin back in the day, when he'd covered for Adam.

Aurora stepped behind the bar and swiftly grabbed the plates Adam was finished with.

"Table four?" she double-checked.

"Yes—and there's no salt in the mash," I added.

"Thanks!" She left again, and I went back to the kitchen.

Table six, time for the vegans!

I went on the computer to load their ticket for Adam to see it on his screen, and I told Lee to get cracking on two orders of roasted asparagus while I went to prepare the fried green tomatoes.

When Jon came in from grabbing dishes, the kitchen door open, I heard Adam mutter, "Damn vegans."

I chuckled under my breath.