Chapter 18

Iwake up in Calvin's arms. He's sound asleep and must sleep like the dead because he doesn't stir as I carefully climb off of him.

My heart clenches, and my belly flips as I stare down at him. My scent match alpha. God, could my life get any more complicated?

What I'm most surprised about is that I'm not freaking out. I might not know Calvin all that well, but I can't deny the fact that I've always had this pull towards him, that I've always felt safe when I was with him. And the sex, God, it really is amazing.

Scent matches aren"t something we can choose, it's whoever the universe chooses specifically for you. I could have been destined for someone much worse.

But this doesn't come without complications. The fact is that Calvin is Zane's brother, and I'm in love with three other alphas.

How would this work? Would Calvin want me to pick? How do I pick between my scent match and the guys I've loved for as long as I can remember?

I just got them back, and the idea of losing them again sits heavily on my heart.

"One day at a time," I whisper before slipping out of Calvin's room and going back up to the guys' hotel room.

"You're back." Everett's voice has me jumping as I try to sneak back in.

"Sorry." I grimace, holding his phone out to him. "I didn't mean to be out so late."

"You were with Calvin?" he asks, crossing his arms as he leans against the wall. He's shirtless, dressed only in a pair of PJ pants that hang low on his waist.

"Yes." I lick my lips, trying not to feel guilty.

"How did that go?"

Do I tell him that Calvin is my scent match? No, not until I've had more time to process it.

"It was okay. We talked."

He nods. "So, Calvin, huh?" he laughs. "Didn't see that coming."

"Neither did I," I sigh.

"Are things over between the two of you?"

"Would you be mad if I said no?" I ask, chewing on my lip as I wait for him to answer.

"You"re an omega. And not all omegas only stick with alphas from one pack. Sometimes, packs merge together. Calvin isn't in a pack, so it would be more like him joining our pack in this case. I can't speak for the others, but I wouldn't be opposed to it."

"You"re so sure I'm going to be in your pack, huh?" A small smile slips onto my lips.

"Oh, I know it, Tiny," he chuckles. "You"re ours, and it was always meant to be. Before you were going to be our beta, but now you"re our omega. Doesn't matter what your designation is, just that you"re ours no matter what. Don't act like you don't feel this too."

He's right. I do feel it.

I'm still pissed about the way they got me to come on this tour, though, and I'm nowhere near done giving Zane shit about it. But, as much as I want to shoot down the idea of being with them and keep the walls around my heart up, I'd be a fool to deny that this isn't exactly what I've dreamed about for years.

Okay, not exactly how I dreamed, but it's close enough, seeing how I thought this dream was dead and gone.

I watch him for a moment, his gaze glimmering from the bathroom light as his emotion-filled eyes watch me back.

I'm not sure what to say, so I don't say anything and turn around to head into the bedroom.

A smile twitches as I find Griffin in the bed, peacefully sleeping, as he snores softly. Exhaustion from the past twenty-four hours floods me. I'm ready to crawl into bed, too, but I scan the room, wondering where Zane is.

"He didn't come back," Everett whispers, his voice tight.

I remember back to seeing him at the bar, and my gut twists. "You don't think he would be... off sleeping with another girl."

"No. God, no." Everett shakes his head. "None of us had any interest in messing around with other women before, and we sure as hell don't now that you"re back in our lives."

His words settle me slightly, although I still can't help but wonder if he would be petty enough to get back at me for sleeping with his brother.

The old Zane wouldn't be. I knew these three better than anyone else in the world. But they're not the same people they once were, and neither am I.

I crawl into the bed, snuggling up to Griffin, needing some alpha contact. Everett crawls in after and curls up behind me. I'm too tired to think about how much I've been craving to be cared for by alphas since these guys have come back into my life. I've never wanted, nor felt the need for one before, so why now?

As I drift off to sleep, my mind's still stuck on Zane, worrying and hoping that he's okay.

Despite the past few years, I care about these guys; they were my family once. And a part of me wants them to be that for me again.

I've kept my heart closed off for so long, told myself it was because I didn't need anyone. Didn't want anyone. When reality is, I didn"t close my heart to everyone, just anyone who wasn't them. And when Calvin came into my life, he found a way to peek over that wall, and it scared me. Because as sad as it is, I was saving my heart for the boys who stole it long ago. I didn't think anyone else could find a way in. But here we are, and I have no idea what's going to happen now.

THIS MORNING HAS BEENinsane. When I woke up, Everett and Griffin were showering and rushing around the hotel like a couple of chickens with their heads cut off. Zane was still nowhere to be found, and apparently, he wasn't answering his phone.

It didn't take me long to realize just how hectic a rock star's life is on the day of a big concert. As the day went on, I followed them around like a puppy, not sure where to go or what to do, before we went to the venue where they had wardrobe and stylists waiting for them. I'm fascinated by the whole process, seeing the guys get fussed over like they are famous people. Because they are, and it's crazy to think this is all real.

As I take in everyone around me, I see that I'm not prepared for tonight. Not that anyone can expect me to be. It's not like I planned on coming here, I didn't have much say in the choice. Or any for that matter.

I didn't think to pick up an outfit at Walmart to wear to a rock concert. "What"s wrong?" Everett asks as I look around at all the crew, feeling out of place as we get ready to head over to sound check.

"Just realizing how much I don't fit in," I say, looking down at my jeans and hoodie.

Everett chuckles. "First off, you look good in anything you wear." He grins, grabbing a piece of my red hair and twirling it around his fingers. "And two, my sweet Tiny girl, did you think I was going to leave you without the chance to dress up for the concert? Not that I think anything is wrong with what you"re wearing right now, but I wanted to give you some choices."

He's looking so damn sexy dressed in ripped jeans, a black shirt with massive armholes showing off all his tattoos. He's got a bit of eyeliner on his lower lids, and his shaggy black hair is all messed up like he just had sex. Maybe he did, because I do remember seeing Everett and Griffin coming out of the dressing room bathroom looking flushed.

"Here." Griffin hops off the makeup chair he's in and grabs my hand, pulling me toward the bathroom. He looks just as sexy as Everett, but he doesn't have any eyeliner on, dressed in an old worn band tee and black leather pants. "For you, my sexy Jelly Bean." He grins, holding out a shirt.

"Really?" I laugh as I look at the shirt he gives me. It"s a band tee... for their band.

"Do you know how sexy it is knowing our omega gets to be our sexy little groupie?" Griffin smirks, biting his lower lip as his eyes slowly devour me. My belly swoops, and I try not to react to his appreciation for me.

"I love it, thank you," I laugh, placing the shirt on the sink. He continues to stand there and stare at me. "Can I help you?" I ask, raising a brow.

"Go on. Get dressed." He nods toward the clothes.

I gape at him. "Leave so I can," I huff out a laugh.

"Oh, come on. Just a peek. Please?" He pouts, clasping his hands together in front of him.

The thought of Griffin seeing me naked sends a thrill through me. What"s a little tease?

"I'm not even wearing a bra." I raise a brow.

His eyes light up. "I don't mind at all."

Of course, he doesn't. I sigh, shaking my head with a grin. Eager little puppy he is. Grabbing the hem of my sweatshirt, I watch his eyes grow with excitement. "Fucking hell, Jade." He lets out a pained groan as I pull it off, my tits bouncing free. "You"re fucking gorgeous."

My cheeks heat as my nipples tighten at his words. He lets out a low, rumbling growl. I gasp, a shiver racing down my spine as my belly warms and slick gushes free.

He reaches for me like he can't help but cop a feel. "Hey," he protests as I slap his hand away. He shakes it out, glaring at me.

"Look, but don't touch." I laugh, grabbing the shirt and pulling it over my head.

"You"re no fun," he pouts.

"Be a good boy, and maybe I'll let you later." I wink.

"Really?" His eyes light up.

"Maybe." I shrug, spinning around and leaving him there in the bathroom with a hard-on that I find myself wanting to take care of.

"Is he here yet?" Gianna comes busting into the dressing room like a bat out of hell. She looks stressed, eyes wild as she glances around the room.

"I'm going to assume you"re asking about Zane?" Griffin asks, joining me at my side.

"Yes, Zane. Who else?" She glares at him. "He won't answer his phone. He's been missing all day. I swear to God, if he misses this show, I'm going to lose my shit."

"Relax." A voice comes from behind her. In comes Zane, looking rough as hell. His hair is a mess, and he's in the same clothes as yesterday. "I'm here."

"Oh, thank God," Gianna says on an exhale. Her nose scrunches up. "Dear God, Zane, you smell like a brewery. Are you drunk?"

"A little," Zane mutters, pushing his way in. "I'm fine to do the show, though."

"What the hell, man?" Griffin gets in his face. "Where the fuck were you?"

"Out," Zane growls. "Fuck off, I need to shower."

"Zane." Everett steps forward.

"I don't want to talk about it," he snaps, casting a look over my way, then back to Everett.

"Hurry up. Early VIPs are starting to arrive for soundcheck," Gianna urges, sounding very frazzled. "And don't forget the makeup. Your eye needs to be covered up."

"Whatever." Zane storms into the bathroom, leaving me there feeling uneasy.

I don't like that he went out and got drunk. I understand that what he found out was a lot to take in, but if this is how he deals with his stress, we're going to have issues. I refuse to be with a drunk or someone who abuses drugs. I've been around it enough growing up, I don't want it in a partner.

"How often does he do this?" I ask Griffin.

"Take off? Almost never."

"No, the drinking."

He looks to Everett and both of them get matching guilty looks. "He knows you don't like it. He'll stop."

"I'm not so sure of that," I mumble, looking toward the bathroom.

"Come on. We can hit the VIP early, give Zane some time to get ready." Everett wraps his arm around my waist and guides me toward the door. "You look sexy in that shirt, Tiny," he murmurs, making me shiver.

"Thanks," I whisper, smiling.

We head through the entrance, and I'm in awe of how big this place is. But my eyes really go wide when we step into the empty stadium. "Holy shit."

"Pretty cool, right?" Griffin chuckles.

"This place is massive. There"s got to be room for what, ten thousand people?" I ask as I take in the stage setup before looking over at Everett.

"Closer to twenty thousand, but for concerts, it would be maxed at nineteen, and we have a sold out show." He winks before we continue toward the group of people in a blocked off area.

"Wow," I breathe in awe. Excitement fills me as I wonder what this place looks like when it's filled with screaming fans.

When we step out onto the floor, I look over to see Calvin approaching, and my cheeks heat. "Hello, my Darling," he greets me, leaning in to kiss my cheek. "Sleep well?"

"I did," I lie. I slept like shit. My brain wouldn't shut off, and I stayed up for most of the night wondering how I'm going to deal with all the new changes in my life.

He gives me a look like he knows I'm lying too. "Here." He hands me a lanyard. "This gets you in anywhere you want when the guys aren"t with you."

"Oh. Thanks." I take it and slip it around my neck. "Extreme VIP treatment. I feel like a celebrity." I laugh.

"Celebrities don't even get that much access," Everett chuckles.

"Everett, Griffin." Gianna comes rushing over. "Could you please get this started? The fans are getting antsy."

"Yeah, of course," Everett agrees and turns to me. "Gotta go, Tiny. Will you be okay on your own for a bit?"

"She will be fine," Calvin chimes in, stepping up behind me. "I got her."

Griffin gives him a dirty look as Everett kisses me on the cheek. Griffin does the same thing before the two of them jog over to where their fans are waiting.

"This is weird," I state as I stand there watching as everyone freaks out over my guys. They all rush at them, their security team having to remind the fans to keep things calm or they will be asked to leave.

"You get used to it after a while. It kind of becomes a routine," Calvin explains, standing so close behind me I can feel the heat of his body. My alpha. My scent match alpha. Fuck, why do I like that so much?

"I'm really proud of them. This is something they worked so hard for. Dreamed about it for years. It's crazy to see it come to life." I look at Calvin over my shoulder. "Do you go on tour with them often?"

He's dressed similar to how he was yesterday. A business suit, but the top few buttons of his dress shirt are undone, showing off a bit of ink. "Sometimes," he answers. "I've gone on a few. But mostly I attend the local shows."

"Then why did you come on this one?" I ask, but I already know the answer.

"Because I wanted time with you." He smirks. "When I found out the guys were leaving early, and the flight itinerary included an extra person, I had a feeling they managed to get you to come along. Although I didn't think they resorted to kidnapping," he chuckles. "But knowing Zane, I'm not all that surprised. I got on the earliest flight out."

"Oh." I nod my head.

"Give any thought to what I said last night?"

"Some." I look back out at the guys where they're smiling, taking photos with fans.

"Decide anything?"

"One thing."

"And what"s that?" he asks, running his hands up and down my arms. His touch feels perfect, and I want more.

"I won't be forced to choose. If I accept this bond, I want the choice to be able to be with the guys as well."

His body stiffens, making my heart race as I wait for his reaction. "I don't like to share," he growls lowly.

I spin around, anger filling my veins. "You don't get a choice. If I risk the chance to open myself up to getting hurt, then I'm doing it on my terms. I like you, Calvin, and I'm not stupid to deny the pull I feel toward you. I'm open to taking you on as my alpha, but they are my family. Family I thought I lost a long time ago. I convinced myself I'd never see them again. Now that I finally have them back, I'm never letting them go." The confession surprises the hell out of me.

Deep down, I knew I was going to give in eventually, I just thought it would take me longer to admit it.

"For my whole life, I've had people controlling me, people telling me what I can and can't do. People who used me, abused me and treated me like I was nothing but a maid to do their dirty work, always having my choices taken from me. When I started at The High Roller, I promised myself that no one would ever take my choice away from me again. I chose to take you on as a client, it wasn't part of my job description. I chose to go on this tour and get the time back with the guys who were taken from me. And I'm choosing not to choose. If you can't accept that, then there"s nothing more to explore between us."

I turn to leave but Calvin grabs my hand, pulling me toward him and keeping me from leaving. I look up into his piercing blue eyes that are swimming with determination.

"You're mine, Jade. And I will do whatever it takes to keep you. Everett and Griffin, they might be on board with you being with me. But him?" His eyes flick over to where Zane had just entered the stadium. The fans go crazy as he jogs over to greet them, a fake smile plastered on his face. "He hates me. He won't accept me being with you."

"If he wants to be with me, he will have to," I tell Calvin, pulling my arm away from him.

I leave him standing there, thinking about what I just said as I head over to the stage. I take a spot on the edge, making sure to keep out of the way.

After the guys are done signing things and taking photos, they make their way over to the stage to start the soundcheck.

From the moment the first note rings through the stadium, I'm in awe. Zane's voice fills the venue, and my whole body shivers, my heart expanding. In that moment, I'm taken back to the days where we spent hours in the music room. Where it was only them, the music they made, and me.

That was my whole world.

Why did someone want to keep us apart? Why did they work so hard to make it happen? We still don't know who or why. But I plan on finding out.

I can't see any reason why more time needs to pass between us. My love for them is still there.

I agreed to two months, but something tells me it's not going to be enough time with them. There will never be enough time with them.

I don't want to live my life at the club with my heart closed off, alone every night for the rest of my life.

As much as I act like this hard-ass omega, at the end of the day I want someone to hold me, care for me, love me. I don't need it, I could live a life without it. But I want it.

I want to go to all of their shows, to cheer them on, and stand by their side.

They are the ones I want coming home to me every night, loving me, letting me love them back.

The thought sends my heart skittering. "I'm doing this," I whisper to myself, smiling as Zane belts out soul-shattering lyrics.

As if he could hear my whispered thoughts, Zane's hazel eyes flick over to me, locking with mine. I feel the world shift around me.

They never wanted to be away from me, and the thought of the pain they've been through because of losing me kills me.

I wasn't the only one hurt by this, and I don't think I have it in me to cause them any more pain.

They're mine. My alphas. Now, I just have to figure out how all of this is going to work.

A few hours later, I'm in a stadium that's filled with thousands of people, who scream the band's name.

The moment they walk out on stage, the whole world disappears. They all find me, smiles dancing on their handsome faces as relief that I'm there fills their eyes like they thought I'd disappear again.

They sing and it feels like it's a private concert just for me.

I'm scared but so excited for what"s to come.

Tattered Souls is mine, and I'm never letting anyone come between us again. Not even my scent match alpha.