7. Yarilo

CHAPTER SEVEN

YARILO

Fuck, the sound of my dick in his throat, the subtle, wet click—something about it made me feel powerful, radiant. And when he pulled back, his lips flushed and slick and swollen, I was lost. There was nothing for it—the juxtaposition of his awkwardness with all that innate allure? I wasn't strong enough.

So I reached out, helping him to his feet and wrapping my arms around his waist. Even with the mess he'd made, he still pressed tight against me.

"Hold on," I whispered, dragging my lips across his cheek.

"What are you?—"

With a lurch, reality opened up around us, blowing apart and reforming in my room above Purple Haze. Maybe I couldn't jump across the world, but when someone called out to me, hungry and pulsing, or to a place that felt like my own? I could manage that, at least in the city I called home.

Rauri flinched. "What the fuck—? How did you?—?"

I laughed, stripping him of his shirt and jeans both—then his pretty lace panties. When he was naked, every inch, I dropped to my knees to lick him clean. "Perks of being a demon," I mumbled against the bend between his thigh and groin, tasting his salt-sweat skin.

He shivered, gripping my shoulders, even as I rose back to my feet to shuffle him back to the bed. "You mean I never have to take the train again?"

I laughed. "I can help you learn."

He bit his lip, nodding. And if I weren't already a demon, if I weren't already destined for the bad place, there was a special seat in hell for me when I pressed him back onto my bed and crawled on top of him.

I shed my clothes piece by piece, tossing them onto the floor around the bed as I kissed every exposed inch of his gorgeous body. Incubi came in every size and shape and arrangement, but there was something so damn charming about the softness of Rauri's belly, the gentle rise to his chest and his limber arms. He was thin, built for leisure and walking fast across his college campus.

Maybe one day he'd look different, but it was hard to imagine him being any more appealing, with his glittering blue eyes and sweet clumsiness.

We'd already come; there was no need to chase more and more and more, so I kissed him slowly, tasted every inch and made note of the spots that made him gasp, where he best liked a round-tipped nail trailed lightly across his skin, what made the bond of our dancing energies pull tighter.

When I settled between his legs and our pace turned needy, it came on us all at once—his hips canting just so, my own thrust. Our bodies moving together like they were made to tangle up like this.

It was quick after that, the rush to the peak, and the swell of energy that crashed over me felt warm and pink and sweet as I pressed my face into the crook between his neck and shoulder.

"I'm sorry," I whispered against his skin.

"Why sorry?"

"I wanted to help you, not just—" My grip flexed on his arm, like even as I denied it, I couldn't help trying to pull him closer.

"You are helping me." He turned and pressed a kiss against my temple. My chest squeezed. "You help me a lot."

I shook my head. "I'm being—I'm being selfish. Reckless with you. It, uh—" I pressed the tip of my tongue into my canine and pulled back enough to look down at him. "It wouldn't be the first time that I've pursued something more with an incubus. I got swept up in it last time. Possessive and demanding and, uh, it didn't work out. I found him with someone else. Which was bad enough, really. But afterward? It made me kind of... dangerous. I—I hurt people. I didn't mean to, and I didn't know, but now I do. And it's—I don't want to—to risk?—"

Rauri bit his lip. As he pushed up on his elbow, he slipped his free hand down my arm and laced his fingers between mine. "You don't want to hurt anybody. I think I can understand that." His gaze went hazy for a second. "How'd you hurt people? Like... on purpose, or like me with Jess?"

I flinched. "Hells, no, not on purpose . It was just like—like I was starving. Ravenous. There was this giant bleak hunger in me that I couldn't sate. It felt like anything was worth—worth not feeling so empty, but when I came back to myself, when it finally stopped tearing up my insides..." I turned away. I wasn't proud of it. "It was centuries ago. I just—" I shuddered.

A whole minute ticked silently by before I felt his thumb swipe across my wrist. "You don't want to hurt anybody, or—or get hurt again?"

I laughed. "I don't—you can't?—"

"Hurt you?" Rauri smiled. "I think maybe I could. Like, maybe your heart's a little more vulnerable than you want people to think?"

I scowled at him. How dare he try and put his finger on—on the truth of me?

But my mouth had gone dry, and I couldn't find it in myself to tell him to fuck off. Didn't really want to, when he was looking at me with all that sweet understanding in his eyes.

"Did you talk about it ahead of time, when he cheated?"

"He didn't?—"

"Yeah, he did. He obviously didn't have your understanding or consent to pursue relationships outside of the one you shared, so he did. Did you talk about it?"

I shook my head. "It might've helped if we had, or maybe it wouldn't have, but I assumed one thing, and he assumed another. So I was just taken by surprise when—well... he did what incubi do."

"All incubi cheat?"

"I—well, no."

"Okay, so he did what he did. Don't lump us all together with him." Rauri scowled, tipping his head to the side. His fluffy dark hair fell cutely across his forehead, the late-afternoon sunlight glinting off part a purple lock. "Is it, like, imperative that incubi have different feeding sources?"

I shook my head. "I don't think so. I mean, demons aren't exactly the kinds of people who sit around and chronicle their own histories, so there aren't How to be a Demon for Dummies books out there. It's just easier to spread the love and not risk—addiction, I guess. Can't think of a better word for it. You fall into one person, get dependent on them alone. They become...everything. Pleasure, sustenance, life ."

The way his smile played on his lips said he might know more about that than I wanted him to.

"So, um—" When he hesitated and glanced down, I tilted my head to get a better look at him. The way that he bit his lip was so cute, I wanted to kiss him again. "Can I be honest with you?"

I nodded. I was old enough—whatever he had to say, I could take it.

"All this demon stuff is kind of over my head? I didn't know what I was until I sprouted horns. Which was a freaking trip, but I don't—I don't exactly have a demon's, um, experience? I grew up human. It—it doesn't sound so outlandish to me to just, like, settle down with one person. Not that I'm saying?—"

Oh, he'd gone so red, his light brown skin turning a rusty shade that swept down his neck.

"I know it's new," he hastened on. "But I also know that when I was lost, you—you offered to help me. To work with me and teach me. You didn't ask for anything in return, you just gave me what I needed. And, well, that's the kind of person I'd want to get to know better. You're the kind of person I want to get to know better. So if I don't have to feed from someone else—and I feel, uh, really full, so unless you're just giving me what I need and, ah, dining out elsewhere?—"

I shook my head. "Doesn't work like that. We generate energy together. I haven't been... hungry, since the first time we?—"

Rauri's breath escaped in a rush, and he grinned at me. "Weirdly, I think I get the possessive thing you're talking about. I'm... kind of glad?"

My turn to bite my lip. I didn't want to smile, even if Rauri had his head in the clouds and wasn't being even the slightest bit practical.

"Anyway"—Rauri cleared his throat—"if I get what I need, and you get what you need, maybe we could—just, what if we agreed to talk to each other? Be honest. Communicate. Prioritize each other's feelings above, like, feeding or anything else. And for—at least for now, be a little possessive with each other? Maybe later we'll want to look outside our relationship, or maybe we won't, but as long as we talk about it and prioritize treating each other well, being honest with each other and anybody else we involve, I think it's not so crazy. We could try. If you—if that were something you wanted."

He looked like he was about to squirm his way out of bed, and I couldn't have that. Not for one second.

I leaned in and kissed him, hard and deep and quick, then leaned back, my weight halfway on his chest. "Okay."

"Okay?"

I nodded. "I want to know you better too. Way I see it, I can either pull away or lean in, and if you mean it? I'd try. It's, um, it's sometimes nice, having somebody."

How long had it been, since I'd had someone I could count on? Most people didn't take me all that seriously, but Rauri? He wasn't just thinking about what I could give him. He was kind, generous, and, like he said, about as human as an incubus could really get.

So why not have the best of both worlds?

The whole room took on a pretty sparkle when Rauri smiled, and I kissed him again, satisfied that this time, I didn't need to try to hold back.