43. Four Months Later

forty-three

Cam

Luigi crossed The Rainbow Bridge last week. 36Not by choice, of course. I was sobbing as the woman at the junkyard practically pried him from my hands.

Dr. Burton said that, just because I knew it was time for a change, doesn't mean it would come easily. He was right about that, which of course just irritated me and made me want to be fine out of spite.

I ended up okay, of course, but spite had nothing to do with it. Somehow, Violet had managed to keep the keys for me. They stay on my bookshelf next to my dad's favorite books and his photo and Cooper's painting, and sometimes, I pick them up and shake them just to hear to the sound.

Ted, my new-to-me 2017 black Toyota Camry, is practically silent as we curve through the bright green mountains. It's strange to not feel every bump and hear every rattle, but I can't say I hate it. Violet sits in the passenger seat, sipping melted iced coffee from Evergreen Grounds, even though we're now two-hundred miles from that tiny green kiosk. I didn't get anything, because caffeine and Prozac aren't the best of friends.

After I noticed a big difference in its effects, Dr. Burton and I completed a few exercises, and a few tests. Apparently, there's a link between Adjustment Disorder and OCD. I never considered that I could have OCD, because I don't walk around touching door frames and buying hand sanitizer in bulk. But then I learned about mental compulsions, and it all started to make sense. I was scared to tell Violet at first. To tell her yet another thing that was wrong with me. But she simply kissed my head, pulled the covers over my body, and told me she would always be there, no matter what. And I had to believe her, because she's proved it.*

"It's not too late to change your mind," she says calmly. "I promise I won't be upset if you decide you just want to go home. Or if you want to get a hotel. I don't want to push you into an attack."

"Violet, I want to meet your family. And Mallory is part of that, I get it. Tyler wants her at her birthday, but she wants us there too. I'm not going to be jealous over your ex-wife."

Violet raises her brows, a slight smirk creeping across her face as she takes a sip of her bean-water.

"Not even a little bit?" She bats her eyelashes, and I shoot her a fake glare, even though I'm smiling.

"Okay, maybe just a tiny bit. But not anything crazy. Just enough to make me want you on your knees."

Violet's face flushes, and she bites her lip. "Perfect."

Ruthie's house isn't unlike Violet's. Victorian but modest, and yellow too. Except now, Violet's is brown. I thought it was kind of a strange pick, but it's her house after all.

"Are you ready?" she asks, gripping a moving box in her hand. I take a deep breath and nod, gripping three nylon leashes in one hand, while I knock on the front door with the other. Violet chuckles.

"Cam!" she yells in a laughing whisper. She twists the doorknob and pushes it open. "You don't knock at Ruthie's."

My cheeks turn red as we step inside. "Oh."

"It looks like everyone's in the backyard," she says, lifting the lid of the box to peek inside. We walk through the house, photos of what I can assume are Ruthie, Jeremiah, Willow and Tyler. They're a cute, all-American family.

Reese walks neatly next to me, Dawson wearily behind. But Westley pulls us toward the back door excitedly, almost like he's been here before.

Violet and I had talked about it one night when we were lying in bed together, how everything felt so perfect yet so incomplete. We couldn't figure out what was missing. She set the contract on fire and I threw away her Furry Friends name tag. But still, something was wrong. Then, we turned on The Princess Bride, for old times' sake, and it hit us.

He had no inquiries when we went to pick him up. Not a single person could look past his rough exterior, even though he looks so much better now than he had when we found him. It broke our hearts, but then, we knew it was divine intervention. It was meant to be.

"Hey!" Violet calls out when we step into the yard. A little brown-haired girl in French braids, who I assume is Tyler, races up and throws her arms around Violet tightly.

"Aunt Vi!" she squeals. Violet hands me the box, very carefully, and throws her arms back around Tyler.

"Hey bug! Happy Birthday!" Tyler beams up at Violet like she's her very own sun. I can't say that I feel differently. Violet gestures to me with a smile. "Tyler, this is my girlfriend, Cam. Cam, this is Tyler."

Tyler smiles up at me, the cutest freckle on the bridge of her nose, just like Violet.

"Hi!" She waves, not shy at all. Her head tilts as she points at the box. "Is that for me?"

I nod, giving her a soft smile.

"It sure is. But we have to wait for your mom first, okay?"

"Okay!" Tyler nods, then barrels off into the yard. A tall man approaches us next, wearing a pink polo shirt tucked into a pair of khaki shorts. He sticks his hand out at me and smiles.

"I'm Jeremiah, it's so nice to finally meet you." He gestures to the box in my hand, his brows raising. "Is that it?"

I nod, and a smile breaks across his face as he reaches out for it.

"I can take that off your hands. I have a setup in the bedroom, so I'll go put it in there."

He winks and pats Violet's back as he walks past her.

"Hey Vi! Your sister's around here somewhere, I think Mallory has her cornered in the garden."

Violet chuckles, shaking her head. "Thanks Jer, I'll track her down."

She turns to me.

"Ruthie isn't the biggest fan of Mallory," she says in a low voice. "But Mallory loves her."

"So if Ruthie hates me, it's not a deal breaker?" I ask teasingly, like I don't mean it. Violet shakes her head.

"She won't hate you." She guides me into the yard, into the corner by the garden. I see a woman who looks like Violet but a little bit taller and a little bit curvier, another blue-eyed baby on her hip. She's talking to Mallory, that shiny auburn hair glistening in the spring sun.

"Hey!" Ruthie calls out, grabbing Violet by the sleeve and pulling her in. Violet drags me along with her, face beaming.

"Ruthie, this is Cam. Cam, this is Ruthie."

She holds her free arm out in a gesture for a hug.

"It's nice to meet the face behind the contract!" Ruthie teases. "And this is Willow." Ruthie bumps her hip forward, Willow propped on top. "She likes to eat things she shouldn't, so she stays here most days."

Ruthie pats her hip. I smile.

"It's nice to finally meet you," I say. I crouch down, waving awkwardly at Willow. I don't have a lot of experience with babies. "Hi, Willow."

Ruthie's cheeks glow, and she gestures to Mallory. "And I guess you two have already met…" she says awkwardly.

Violet elbows her roughly, and Ruthie scowls.

"What?" she asks defensively, rubbing her side. Violet simply shoots her a look.

My eyes drift to Mallory, a nervous smile on her face. I don't know everything that happened between her and Violet, I just know it isn't my business. And her sleeping with Cody? Well, that was a blessing in disguise. For me, at least. If anything, I feel sorry for her.

"Hey," Mallory says shyly. She's beautiful, like, ridiculously beautiful. And I am just the right amount of jealous.

"Hi," I say back, offering her a smile. Mallory smiles back, her glossy lips shining in the sunlight.

"All right!" Jeremiah calls out, clapping his hands together. "I think it's time for presents."

"Yay, presents!" Tyler squeals, running to the porch.

His brows raise to Ruthie, and she nods, looking between Violet and me.

"Oh, thank you guys so much for bringing her up. I just knew when I saw that little face on the Pine Paws website that Tyler had to have her."

I smile, and Violet pats a hand on Ruthie's back.

"She doesn't come pre-trained so just—" She pats it twice more. "Good luck, kid."

We circle around the table as Tyler opens her presents. "Just Dance" from Mallory, and a few puzzles and books from her parents. She opens them all with the exact same gratuitous expression, saying "thank you" after even the smallest gifts.

"There's one more." Violet wiggles her eyebrows at Tyler, who tilts her head, confused. "We had to save the best for last, of course."

Tyler shakes her head. "Dad says that all presents are equal because the people who give them to us all love us."

Violet shoots Jeremiah a smirk, then looks down at Tyler.

"Oh, we'll see about that."

She runs inside and comes back with that same cardboard box.

"Sorry, I had to put you back in," she whispers into it as she sets it in front of Tyler. Tyler looks agitated, like she's both excited and scared to open it.

"Alright, go ahead, baby," Jeremiah says. Tyler lifts the top of the box, her eyes practically bulging out of her head as she looks inside. She squeals and jumps back to contain her excitement.

"You got me a puppy?" she whispers, tapping her feet excitedly back and forth like a penguin. Jeremiah scoops the fluffy black puppy into his arms and cradles her gently.

"Well, you're not getting another sibling so—"

Ruthie shoots him a glare, and Mallory chuckles.

Tyler throws her arms around Violet and I both, squeezing tightly.

"Thank you, Aunt Vi! Thank you, Aunt Cam!"

Violet grins at me, watching as a smile forces its way across my face. My cheeks turn pink.

"Yeah, you're definitely her favorite now," Ruthie whispers to me, and I bite my lip to hide a smile.

"Can I hold her?" Tyler asks. Jeremiah nods, motioning for her to sit back down.

"Be respectful, remember?"

Tyler nods, holding out her arms. "I will."

I feel a soft tug on the sleeve of my shirt, Violet tossing her head to the side in a "follow me" gesture. I slide my chair back and trail her to the corner of the yard.

I quirk an eyebrow, but as my lips part to speak, Violet begins to word-vomit.

"This is a really bad time, I know that," she says quickly. "But if I don't ask now, I'm going to chicken out." She reaches into her pocket and retrieves a singular silver key. "I know you love your apartment, and if you want to keep it, that's totally fine. This is a big thing I'm asking, a big change, and we can revisit it later down the road if we need to. But I would love it if you would—"

"Yes," I cut in with a breathy laugh. I nod repetitively, a huge grin breaking across my face. "Yes Violet, I will move in with you."

The tension in Violet's body eases, a smile tugging at her lips as she pulls me in and cradles my face in her hands.

"I love you, Cam," she says, pressing her lips to my forehead. I melt into her, my fingers gripping onto her shirt.

"I love you, Violet," I say back. The spring air feels warm against my skin, the sun beaming down brightly.

I'm not where I was a year ago. Hell, I'm not where I was yesterday. I was scared of it before, but now, I'm so grateful that everything has changed.