Chapter 12

CHAPTER 12

Clara

Me: I got lost in the woods.

Riggs: What in the hell? How?

Me: I don't know. I was on the trail during my run, and then I got off it. Thankfully, Gretzky and Gordie knew where to go. Darcy and I were as lost as last year's Easter eggs.

Riggs: JFC. Be careful out there. Don't go trailing too deep. Actually, stay on the road. It's four miles to the stop sign at the turn to my house.

Me: I'm honored you think I can run eight miles.

Riggs: You can't? Maybe if you ate more, you could.

Me: Is that a challenge?

Riggs: If you plan on running with me, I do eight miles. And no matter how much you flash those little doe eyes at me, I won't carry you.

Me: I bet I could convince you.

Riggs: Did you eat after your run?

I grin to myself, my face flushed as I position my smoothie and breakfast sandwich before sending him a photo. He hearts my photo before writing back.

Riggs: Good girl.

My thighs clench, and the butterflies dance in my belly.

Me: You're very demanding. Bossy, even.

Riggs: So I've been told. I don't see a problem.

Nor do I.

Me: I know I work for you, but you treat me like one of your players.

Riggs: Stop acting like them, and I won't.

Me: How would you like me to act?

When I send the little angel emoji, I know I'm playing with fire, but I can't help it. I didn't sleep a wink last night. No matter that I rubbed my clit to the point of pain, I couldn't get off enough to fall deep into sleep. I am so unsatisfied, it's tragic. I was so enveloped in his smell, in my thoughts of him doing the dirtiest things to me, it almost brought me to tears. I want him. But I hate that I can't get a read on him. One minute, I think he wants me too, but then I second-guess myself, thinking he is only looking out for me because he's older than me.

It's really frustrating.

After my run that didn't help a damn thing, especially when I got lost, I took a shower, loaded up the dogs, and then we went to pick up all my other charges. Once I got them settled with my two employees, I headed toward Drippy Drip to get my smoothie. I added the sandwich when I remembered Riggs would be on me if I didn't. I probably need the fuel after no sleep and getting lost, considering I have to go over to Dirty Pages to unload shipments.

Since Louisa has moved to Nashville to be with her hotshot hockey-player hunk, I have taken over receiving shipments for her. Eliza was doing it, but she basically moved to Nashville too. I'm not sure what will happen with Dirty Pages. There is talk of opening one in Nashville, but it does so well here. Tourists and locals love what the store offers. Romance-only books? I mean, come on! It's the best, and I love it. That's probably why I don't mind spending one day a week there.

Beside me, Gordie and Gretzky sit so pretty, while Darcy is on his back, his legs in the air as he squirms against the floor. As bad as it sounds—and trust, I love my boy—these three remind me of the hyenas from The Lion King . Two are all put together and smart, while the third is derpy. I know I'm wrong for thinking my boy is derpy, but Gordie and Gretzky make him look bad. Alone, he is the bestest, smartest boy, but alongside the mini-me's of Riggs McCoy, he's a bit of a loose screw.

Now I feel bad.

With a giggle, I lean down and scratch Darcy's belly. His tongue lolls out, and his eyes are full of love for me. "You may look derpy with these two around, but you're my baby, aren't you?"

Gordie leans his head against my knee, and I kiss his nose. "I love you too."

Gretzky doesn't let anyone upstage him, licking my thigh until I kiss him too. "You too, you sweet boy."

Me: I think the boys love me more than they love you.

I send a photo of all three dogs loving on me and smile when Riggs hearts my photo.

Riggs: Or they're trying to get food out of you.

Me: Rude! I am a great dog sitter.

Riggs: Never said you weren't. You're the one trying to steal my boys from me.

Me: Scared?

Riggs: Not even in the slightest.

Me: I could steal them, you know.

Riggs: How? We three run eight miles. You couldn't keep up.

Me: Wow, choosing violence this morning?

I can't help but grin.

Riggs: You tell me you got lost, and you make it a point not to take care of yourself. Oh, and you're trying to steal my dogs. Talking to you raises my blood pressure and forces me to choose violence.

Me: I'm sorry, Grandpa. Do you need me to pick up your meds on the way home?

Riggs: You're a menace like your dog.

Me: Since I'm so bad for your health, maybe you shouldn't talk to me.

I'm provoking him. I want him to say that he wants to talk to me, that he enjoys my texts, that he lives for my words. That he wants me.

I should have known better.

Riggs: I am well aware that talking to you is bad for my health.

Me: Then don't answer my texts.

Riggs: That can be arranged.

Me: Cool. Download the damn app.

Riggs: Maybe I should.

Me: Do it.

Riggs: I will.

Me: Good. See ya, Grandpa.

Riggs: Make sure you eat.

I want to tell him to go fuck himself, but instead, I tuck my phone into my pocket. Gordie is looking up at me expectantly, and I shake my head. "Your dad is an asshole."

Or maybe I'm just an idiot.

The asshole downloaded the app.

And he hasn't texted me since.

This is what I get for provoking him. For playing with fire when I knew better. I had plenty of warnings from Elliot, and still, I let myself want him. I let myself think something was brewing between us. I'm such a dumbass. It's been two days, and the Bears are coming home this morning after winning both games in the series.

While it's the best of seven in the NHL for all play-off rounds, it's the best of five in the AHL in the early rounds. The conference final and Cup final rounds are the best of seven. Since this is a conference final, the boys have a lot of work to do, but I have no doubts the Bears won't be returning to Michigan.

My future brother-in-law is locked in and ready to go. He is leading his team to victory, and it's a sight to see. His goal is to have a photo of his son in the Cup hanging on the wall. It's the sweetest thing ever, and I can't help but love him something insane for loving my sister and nephew so much. The only problem with everyone else being so in love and happy is that I feel more alone than ever. Which is pathetic when I have the best dog in the world that loves me endlessly.

I cuddle closer to Darcy. He sleeps soundly beside me while Gordie sleeps against my back and Gretzky sleeps between my legs. It's early morning, and I should be getting up to go on my run, but I'm being lazy. Plus, my back is aching from sleeping on the floor the last two nights. I couldn't bear sleeping in Riggs's bed. Not with how badly I want him and that he thinks I'm bad for his health. So, instead, I've been sleeping with the dogs in their beds. I know that's pathetic, maybe a bit childish, and I know I'm being stubborn, but it bothers me that he hasn't texted me.

I really did convince myself he liked me.

But why does it matter? I am a catch. Any guy would love to be with me, so why am I wasting my time being all hung up on a guy who doesn't even want me? I am better than this. I am Clara Drew McDavid, a cult survivor, a business owner, and a fucking badass boss bitch! I don't need a man. I've got Darcy, and I can get myself off in seconds.

I'll just ignore the fact that I get off so quickly because I am thinking of Riggs.

He is replaceable!

Yeah. Replaceable.

I roll my eyes, and I refuse to allow myself to contradict that thought. I also need to remind myself to ignore the ache in my chest, but that might be a bit harder. I want to call Elliot. I want to unload on her and have her tell me that I'm better than this. I just know she'll tell me she told me so, though. She'll get all protective and big sister on me, probably kick Riggs in the balls.

She has a habit of being violent when it comes to her sisters.

I think we all love her more deeply for that.

I close my eyes, exhaling and not allowing myself to cry. He hasn't texted me—who cares? I still have a job with him, and I still get to love on Gordie and Gretzky. Now, if he fires me, then I'll cry. I can't be sad over a guy who doesn't want me.

That's his choice, and really, he's dumb. I'm awesome.

Though, I don't feel that awesome right now.

I nuzzle my nose in Darcy's scruff. I really should get up, get my day started, but I'm so warm and comfortable with my pups. I could skip my run today. The only reason I was trying to up my time was so I didn't embarrass myself when I ran with Riggs. I doubt that will ever happen now.

As much as I love the boys, I may need to quit this gig.

Just as the thought hits, Gordie moves his head to my neck. He sighs contentedly, and my heart warms. No, I can't quit. I love these boys.

And even though it makes me an idiot, I'm still crushing hard on Riggs.

When my phone dings with a text, I open my eyes, and I'm not gonna lie, I almost come out of my skin. Excitement flushes through my body when I see a message from Riggs. My eyes widen and my heart slams into my ribs as I hit the notification with a shaky thumb.

Riggs: Why in the hell are you sleeping on the floor?

Wait. What?