2. The Unattainable

TWO

THE UNATTAINABLE

CAM

B ack at their place, a nice three-bedroom condo on the top floor of a secure building, I can't sleep. Between Kallie giving him shit for being out so late—since when did one o'clock constitute a late night?—and then giving it to him good in bed, if the headboard banging on the wall and their loud moans of fuck yes are any indication.

I turn on my side and stuff a pillow on top of my ear, reminding myself this is only a temporary situation, as my place gets renovated next door.They were kind enough to offer me their guest bedroom, so I suffer.

My thoughts wander and I find myself in territory I rarely entertain. I skim the years of my life and all the things that made me who I am.

A drunk, neglectful father. An absent mother.

Learning to survive in a tough neighborhood.

Latching on to hockey as my only ticket out of the cycle of abuse and poverty. It's not a cheap sport to be involved with, and there's plenty I did I'm not proud of, to afford to keep playing.

Then I land on a vision of a young, lean ballerina, dancing and dazzling. I couldn't breathe watching her graceful lines, and I hold my breath now just thinking about her.

She was unattainable, something a bad boy like me could never have. Something so delicate and proper and so far above me, I'd ruin her if I tried to claim her.

Becca Brooks. My best friend's sister. I can't believe years later I'm still thinking of her.

Only one time did their rich family bring me to one of her recitals, having overheard their mom say she hoped it would give me "culture." We sat in the front row while Rebecca Brooks danced with such poise in the lead role of Romeo and Juliet.

As she danced, in one part, she paused when she extended her arm and her line of sight caught my eyes. We held each other's gaze there for a moment as if we were the two star-crossed lovers. It turns me on thinking about the beauty of that moment even now.

She's the one I could never have, though. I'd never be good enough for her. A guy like me doesn't deserve her.

Besides, off-stage we couldn't stand each other.

Suddenly, my cock hardens like a rock, the blood rushing to it as I picture her pert little nose and her sassy mouth and red lips. Wherever she is, she's probably on her knees wrapping that mouth around her rich husband's prick after a night at the country club ….

"Shit." I hiss and throw the pillow across the room as Big D and his girl finally finish. Now I can't stop thinking about Becca. I head to the bathroom for a long-shower and some hand to cock relief because it's the only way I'll get any sleep tonight.