19. Chapter 19

"Thought I"d be the first one here," Coach"s voice boomed from behind the veil of dimmed gym lights. His silhouette was a mountain against the backlight of the morning sun streaming through the windows.

Ever since last week, I've been working hard to make changes. My conversation with that kid, Topher, and Ashlynn opened my mind to options. I wasn't just trying to do better for myself anymore. I was a role model to kids, and I wanted to be someone who Ashlynn would want to be with. I need to stay on the right track to success.

On the morning we were supposed to leave for Vegas, I decided to head to the arena and get one solo practice in before jumping on the bus.

"Ready to work?" Coach asked, his tone a challenge that set my nerves on edge.

Lately, I had been on his shit list. If only he knew the things I had done to his daughter– I couldn't even finish my own thoughts. I respected and admired Coach Carl for everything he had done for me and the Sunnyvale Hawks.

"Born ready," I replied, masking the quiver of anticipation with bravado.

I need Coach Carl to see that I'm making changes and to know that I'm a good man. One day, I want to tell him that I am with his daughter. I don't know if I love her yet, but what I feel for Ashlynn is strong. It's real.

"Good. Let"s see if you can keep up," Coach said.

"I can. I've been training hard. I am ready to bring my A-game this week," I inform him.

"Glad to hear. We've got a tough set of games ahead. I need your head in the game and nowhere else," he grunts.

I continue skating, moving my stick around the ice with my heavy pads and gear weighing me down. I've been playing goalie but also filling in when needed in other positions. As the guys start filing into the arena, several of them wave or cheer me on as they spot me on the ice. We are all riding on tour buses to the games and once we are out of Sunnyvale, we have to be in game mode.

I catch Ashlynn walking into the arena, and she looks adorable in a pair of black yoga pants and a teal sweatshirt. Sunglasses adorn her head with her messy bun. She's holding a coffee mug and looks exhausted. I smile at her, but don't make it known.

Keeping our relationship a secret is going to be hard this week. We will be in close quarters, and I will do my best to keep my hands off her.

"Hey, Logan. You look slow out there. Speed up," Coach Carl barks at me.

I know he is trying to mess with me, to push me like I said I could handle.

I start skating faster and pushing myself to the brink of exhaustion.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Ashlynn frown as she bites her lip. As I launch into another set of drills, she struts over to her dad and with concern lacing in every syllable, "He"s pushing too hard, Dad."

"Let him," Coach replied, a hint of pride threading his voice. "That"s how diamonds are made."

Shaking her head, Ashlynn looks upset. "Shouldn't he be resting? They have a game tomorrow," Ashlynn argues.

Pride swells inside of me as I hear Ashlynn defending me. I don't need her to have my back, but it feels fucking amazing that she does. Other than Topher and the guys, no one has ever cared enough about me to stick up for me. But here she is doing it, and she doesn't even realize I see it.

Huffing, Ashlynn stomps off, and I watch as Coach Carl just laughs. Since Ashlynn has been in Sunnyvale, I've seen him opening up just a little. Don't get me wrong; the man is still grumpy as hell and about as soft as a cactus, but he smiles more, doesn't yell as much, and honestly, he seems a little less stressed. Maybe Ashlynn is that change in him?

"Logan, you going to stick around here, or do you plan on going to Vegas with us?" Jace yells from the sidelines.

I take off my gloves and offer him the middle finger as I skate over to the edge of the rink. Sweat drips off my forehead, and my clothes stick to my frame. Even though my legs ache, it feels good to get this additional workout in before we hit the road. I arrived at the arena around five in the morning and have been practicing since. My luggage is by the door, and I already see the equipment managers loading our bags onto the bus.

"I wouldn't miss Vegas for anything," I say, slicing ice in Jace's direction.

"Are you two idiots done fucking around?" Topher calls out to us. "The buses are loading, and we are waiting for you all."

Jace and I both flip him off as I step off the ice. I peel my equipment off and quickly stuff the pieces in my bag. I need a shower, but it's going to have to wait until we get to Vegas.

"Gross, I'm not sitting anywhere near you, Logan," Tripp says, holding his nose as he passes me.

I let out a hearty laugh as I run and catch him, as he goes to give Sadie a hug. I put him in a headlock, and he began punching my ribs.

"Are you trying to kill me?" Tripp protests as I hold him tighter.

Jace walks past us. He's used to our antics, and we all know better than to intervene when we are messing around.

"Nah, just wanted to give you a hug," I say right before I release him.

Tripp stumbles back and pretends to gag as Sadie laughs. "You guys are so weird. I will never understand you all," she giggles.

Sadie and the rest of the media department are driving separately from us. None of them wanted to ride on a bus with a bunch of rowdy, sweaty college hockey players. Now that I smell myself, I don't blame them.

I follow the guys outside to where the buses are waiting. Ashlynn stands off to the side, talking quietly with Coach. I want so badly to ask her where she will be sitting, but I know better than to do it. Instead, I walk right past her without giving her a second glance.

It is literally painful to be this close to her and not be able to talk to her or hold her the way I want to. Our eyes lock as I step onto the bus, but neither one of us even dares a smile.

***

An hour into the drive, I regret not showering.

I smell like a teenage boy"s bedroom, and all of the guys are giving me shit for it. Ashlynn is sitting in the front of the bus with the coaches and the PR team. The guys forced me to the back of the bus next to the restroom. It sucks, but I really can't say that I blame them.

Bored, I decided to send a text to Ashlynn.

Me: Miss me yet?

Ashlynn: Hard to miss you when I can smell you from the front of the bus.

Me: Ouch. Maybe you can give me a bath later.

Ashlynn: Only in your dreams. Remember, we will be in a hotel with all of the team and my dad.

Me: Don't act like that's going to stop me from getting a chance to taste you again.

Ashlynn: I guess you will just have to get creative.

Me: You have no idea how creative I can get.

I decided to close my eyes and sleep the rest of the ride. However, all my mind can think about is images of Ashlynn naked, and I know that I am definitely going to get lucky in Vegas.