29. Travis

Day 5 in hospital…

Beep…beep…beep.

“Doc, this is taking-”

“Travis, you have to remember she died, had oxygen loss to the brain, water in her lungs, her body was so cold-”

“I get it, but-”

“Give her time to repair her body. She’s fighting. Every day she’s getting better.” The doctor looks over Bea, I shake my head, and sit back down taking her hand in mine.

Five days, and nothing. It feels like I’m being punished, being tested in some fucked up way.

“Travis, go home,” I ignore Quinn, who has been here everyday after he finishes his classes for the day. “You need to sleep.”

“I’ll sleep when she wakes up,” I snap back. I’ve left twice since this nightmare started. Blake had to drag me out, and Logan stayed with Bea. They told me I need to at least shower, and get some food in me. I was only gone for two hours, and it felt wrong every second I was away from her.

My phone vibrates in my pocket, and I dig it out.

Blake - Our dads have all been in your dad”s house all morning.

Logan - They’re up to something.

It’s like they know something.

Blake - I’ve got someone following them.

Travis - They’re always up to something.

Just need to keep our heads up.

Putting my phone on the side, I watch the doctor write something on the clipboard, and then look over at me.

“He’s right, you need to sleep.” Again ignoring the comment, because it’s not the first time he’s told me, and I have a feeling it won’t be the last either. “Everything looks good. You’ve got yourself a fighter here.”

“I know,” I whisper as I watch her lying there. I hate the wire, and tubes, but it’s the only thing helping her at the moment.

The doctor leaves, and Quinn pulls a chair to the other side of the bed. “Right girl gossip time. The bitch is loving the fact she’s back on top, you need to wake the fuck up and put her back in her place. But the funniest piece of you news, I don’t think you’re ready for this one-” Quinn laughs to himself. Everyday he’s been coming he tells her about his day on campus, even his dates, which I don’t care about but if this is what they normally do I don’t care. “Laura, the party animal, went to the bar last night, she lasted an hour before she left.” He shakes his head, and continues with his story. “An hour, you know we have to find her a man, once she’s had sex, she’ll be out all the time.”

I fucking knew Laura was a virgin, Blake and Logan thought I was crazy, telling me no one is a virgin anymore. By the time they come to college, they’ve had sex, but there was something about Laura that told me differently. She’s not confident around us, I mean not many people are, but she curls up into a ball. But the more I watched her, I noticed she’s like that around all guys on campus.

“Asshole teacher is being a prick, waiting for something to happen to him-” Quinn locks eyes with me, and I chuckle to myself. “Needs to be brought back down to earth.”

“He will be, don’t worry.” I’ve been thinking about him a lot, a part of me was like just get rid of him, but then I thought long and hard about it. He wanted to make Bea’s life hard, so I’m going to make his life hard. By the time I’m finished with him, he will have no money, and no family.

“Do you know any single nice men?” he asks me, and I have to laugh.

“I’m not sure if they are gay.” I rub my finger over the palm of Bea’s hand.

“Name?” Quinn asks. I knew they had a radar for this stuff, and the one name I’m thinking is who I’m saying is gay on the team.

Antonio?” I lean back in my seat, not letting go of Bea’s hand.

“Don’t think I’m in his league?” Quinn sounds a little gutted about it, and I have to smile because I was right. “He seems a little crazy.”

“Crazy isn’t a bad thing, it can be fun.” I reply, rubbing my eyes, as they begin to sting from not sleeping.

“You three haven”t once given me a look or acted weird about me being gay. A lot of people when they find out Bea’s best friend is gay, they step away. Then again she has to be dating someone, I don’t thing sleeping-”

“I’m going to stop you there. We don’t talk about Bea before me. We don’t care, you’re not trying to make a move on us, so why should we care?” He needs to know we don’t need to be talking about people Bea has been with. I have a feeling it might be a lot, it’s not like I’m a saint with the amount of women I’ve fucked.

“Do you love her?” Quinn asks.

“Yes.” I don’t even take a second to think about my answer, I know Bea is mine, and will be until the very end. She doesn’t get a choice, I will chase her every day until she gives up. My life without her in it, doesn’t mean a thing to me.

“Don’t hurt her.”

“Not planning to-” I stop talking when he shakes his head. “You know what she wanted to tell me don’t you?” I’ve been thinking about what she wanted to tell me, but I already know a lot now. Tess’ letter has given me so much information. So what else can Bea tell me?

“I can’t tell you what she wanted to tell you, but I can tell you she worked her ass off to get into college. Her number one goal, bring down your family. She didn’t know you hated your dad, as much as she hates him-” Quinn shifts in his chair, not sure why; I”m not going to say anything to him. “- she was going to do anything to break the Parker family no matter what. You hated your dad, she started to…I want to say like you, but I don’t care what she says, she loved the sex.” Both Quinn and I start laughing, why the hell did he think I kept coming back for her. The sex is amazing. “Her mom told her a lot about what happened in your house, and I mean a lot. There was one thing which she kept fighting about telling you. A part of her wanted to tell you, the other part was scared you’d hate her, and leave. Everything she did, she did for her family, to fight for her family. If anything, please remember that.” Quinn stops talking and looks up at Bea, but my glance moves to her tiny hand in mine as it twitches in mine.

How fucking bad can it be? I don’t care how bad it is, her mom protected my sister, I’ll be in her debt forever.

I quickly stand up, and Quinn runs out the room shouting for a doctor as Bea tries to cough. Cupping her face, moving her hands away from the tube. “I’m here-” She grabs my hands, eyes wide open. “I’m here.” I whisper, and she finally blinks, letting the tear escape her eyes.

The doctor rushes in and I try to move out of the way for them, but Bea doesn’t let go of my hand. “I’m not leaving Firecracker, not leaving.”

“She needs to calm down,” the doctor shouts, and I look over at the machine beeping like fucking crazy. She waves her hand at the doctor, and moves it. “Pen?” she nods, and the doctor gives her a pad. “Calm down Bea. You’re not in danger anymore.” The doctor tries to calm her down.

I move to the other side of the bed, moving the hair away. “Calm down, Firecracker. You’re not leaving me.” I whisper in her ear, and look up at her tapping the clipboard. “She’s alive-” I turn to her. “You’re alive-” Tapping the clipboard again, she writes no in capital letters. What the hell is she trying to tell me? She taps the words she’s alive again. “Who?” I ask her.

“Bea, we’re going to take the tube out, but you have to calm down.” The doctor moves to the head of the bed, and starts doing something with the tube.

Shaking my head, when she tries to write on the clipboard. “Bea, it can fucking wait!” I say to her, because the machine is beeping like crazy now. I was scared when she was in the water, but now I’m watching the worst thing happen in front of me.

She starts coughing like crazy when the tube is pulled out of her mouth, she drops the clipboard, as her body begins to spasm.

“What is happening?” I ask someone in the room, as they rush around. “Doctor, what is happening?” I shout.

“Her body is going into shock. She’ll be fine, just need to calm her down.” He takes the needle off the nurse and injects Bea with it. “She’s out of the danger zone, her body fought, now it’s just calming her down.” The machine finally stops beeping like crazy, and back to the normal annoying sound. “She’ll sleep, and when she wakes up I’m hoping we will have a girl who will be talking.” He pats my arm as I walk past him to Bea.

“Fucking scared me, Bea.” I kiss her forehead, and pull the chair closer to the bed again. Looking at the clipboard at the end of the bed, who the hell is alive, and why was it so important to tell me. Pulling the clipboard over, and I turn it around, as I read the words I drop the board on the bed, pushing myself away from the bed.

How the fuck could she hide this from me?

Why would she hide this from me?

Quinn walks to the otherside of the bed, and looks at the clipboard. “Everything she did was for her family, the same way you’ve been doing things for yours.”

I don’t even bother answering him back, and pull my phone out.

Travis - Get to the hospital now!

If I ever need to talk to someone, it’s now, and they’re the only two people I can talk to, who won’t think I’m going fucking crazy.

I know she’s not alive, she can’t be.

“Are you sure? She did die.” Blake is the first one to comment about this.

“I agree, she’s not thinking straight. We would have found something.” Logan adds.

It took them both about half an hour before they said anything, because like me they were shocked. It doesn’t make sense

“Would we? Cain knew more about my family than we did. Seems like we don’t really know anything. Fucking hell, Bea seems to know more, and this one thing-” I punch the wall behind me. “This one fucking thing she should have told me from the start.” How the hell could she keep this a secret from me?

“Travis,” I look over at Logan. “Right, we will look into this, I’ll ask Cain if he knows anything, but I’m sure he would have told us, but you never know. This is a lot, but you need to focus on her.” He points to the room behind me, but right now I don’t think I can be in the room with her.

I shake my head, “Cain is coming here, I called him, he should be here soon..” I tell them, and ignore the part about Bea, but they won’t stop.

“And Bea?” Logan asks.

“This isn’t something small guys, this is…I don’t know.” I stop, because I’ve been fighting with myself since I read the paper on the clipboard. “I love her, but…she did it for her family, and that’s what I have to remember. Yet, I hate her for it at the same time.”

“And ifyou don’t talk to her, you will always hate her. Your dad took everything from her, her brother, her dad, and her mom. You were part of her plan, remember that too.” Blake tells me, and I sit on the chair by the door.

I asked Quinn to stay with her while I talked to the guys, he said he needed to go somewhere but it could wait.

“Yeah I know, do you think it’s just in her head after what happened?” I ask them, trying to keep the hope that it’s true, but also not getting too excited in case it’s a lie.

“With your dad, who the fuck knows. We would have found something right? We looked into them like crazy, so if it’s true, how the hell did they do it?” Logan asks, and that’s just one of the questions running around in my head. I have a thousand more, and I don’t even know which one to ask first.

“He might know,” Blake nods his head, and I turn around to see Cain walking over to us.

“When I said call if you need me, I didn”t mean in less than twenty four hours. What the fuck did you three do before me?” he asks, looking through the door as Bea. “Good to see the tubes out.”

“Is there something else you’re hiding from us, about my family?” I ask, not even giving him a reply to his comment. He places his hands in his pocket, standing tall, and cracks his neck. “If you knew something would you tell me?”

“I’ve told you everything I know. So you want to spit it out, why did you ask me here, before I get pissed off.” For some crazy reason I do think he would tell me, if he knew about this.

“Do you know anything about my mom?” I ask.

“Fuck, I was in the pit when I heard about it. She was killed in a crash, and that’s it. Tess told me what happened.” Cain answers, and I honestly don’t think he’s lying about it.

“Did you ever-”

“Travis, I never thought about it again. What’s happening?” He cuts me off, because I could probably go on forever about this.

“Bea woke up, and she wrote this on a piece of paper,” I show him little by little.

“She’s alive…Who?” He asks and I show him the rest of it. “Your mom.” He locks eyes with me, and I think for a split second he thought I was talking about Tess. “I don’t know anything about it, if I did I would have told you when I told you about Tess. Now you know I haven’t hidden anything from you, anything else?”

“No.” he doesn’t know anything, and I don’t think he’s open to helping us either. “Thanks for coming down.” He looks into Bea’s room again before turning to me and giving me a nod. “You at the club?” I ask him, not sure why, but if I need something maybe he might help me.

“The pit, I’ll be gone for a few days.” Before we can ask him anything he walks away from us, and I watch Quinn talking to Bea about something stupid I bet.

“What do you want us to do?” Logan asks.

“I don’t fucking know. You know I”ve been seeing her places, I thought I was going crazy. If this is true, where the hell is she?” I ask myself more, but they both answer.

“We’ll look into it.” Blake answers.

“You, go be with her. She might be able to tell you more.” Logan pats my back, and I tell them I’ll call when she wakes up.

I stand by the door, and just watch her. I’m angry and I can’t even shout at her, or fight with her for not telling me.

I want to tell her; I can’t forgive her for this, yet I can’t walk away from her either. Never thought my mom would be here, and I never thought the woman I fell in love with would hide something so big from me.

Fucking hell, my head is fighting with itself. My heart is fighting with itself.

What the hell should I be doing?