Chapter 13

After a sobering shower together, Psalm and I fell into his bed. I was pretty sure I was knocked out before he even got comfortable. My deep drunken sleep was interrupted by Psalm’s voice in my ear.

“I’m about to get up and smoke right quick. You hungry?”

“Yeah.” My voice was gravely as I adjusted my pillow and made myself more comfortable.

“Get up. I have a surprise for you.”

“A surprise?”

“Yes, baby. Come on.”

As I pulled myself together and slipped out of bed, I wondered what kind of surprise Psalm had for me. Instead of worrying about the dress I wore last night, I opened a few of his drawers until I found a T-shirt. I left his bedroom to find him leaning against the kitchen counter.

“I half expected you to be in here cooking,” I told him.

“I don’t know why.”

“You asked if I was hungry.”

“That was to get you moving.”

“Wow. You think I just love to eat.”

“You have a healthy enough appetite.”

“I like not starving to death.”

“As most of us do. Food isn’t the surprise though. These are,” Psalm said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a set of keys.

“You went and got my key?”

He chuckled. “Anya, I don’t even know where your girl lives.”

“Well, what are those?”

“I’m trying to decide if my shirt is enough of a nightgown on you for me to take you outside. Let me grab you some shorts.”

“This thing is swallowing me.”

“So you feel comfortable going outside like that?”

“Not without any shoes on.”

“Let me ask you this. Do you feel comfortable with me knocking somebody out for looking at them pretty chocolate thighs?”

“Not exactly.” I grinned.

“Well, I think I might need to get you those shorts.”

“Fine.” I shrugged, following his lead back into his room.

Psalm walked over and got a pair of basketball shorts out of a drawer before passing them to me. After I put on the shorts, I stuck my feet back in my sandals, and we went to the elevator. As the doors closed, Psalm removed those keys from his pocket.

“Hold these keys. You’ll need them when we make it downstairs.”

I frowned as I took the keys from his hand. There were a couple of keys on the ring, one of which was a key fob. My eyebrows drew together.

“Are these your keys?”

Psalm leaned in and kissed the side of my head before holding my shoulders and turning me to face him. Without a word, he grabbed my chin and pressed a kiss against my lips. The doors of the elevator opened, and he took my hand and led the way to a car.

“I know you’re tired of running out of gas. So I got you a car that doesn’t require any.”

“What do you mean it doesn’t require any?”

“I bought you an electric car. You don’t have to worry about charging it because I have a bay here, and I’ve located two near your apartment.”

“I don’t understand.” I shook my head.

“You do know they make cars that don’t require gas, right?”

“I get that. What do you mean you got me a car? I have a car.”

“Now you have two.”

“I don’t need two cars. Psalm, why did you get me a car? I can’t pay you for this.”

“I think I just said I got it so you don’t have to worry about gas.”

“Wow. I don’t know what to say,” I said, admiring the pearl white car.

“ Clearly, you don’t. If you threaten to pay me again, we’re gonna have problems.”

“It wasn’t a threat, baby.”

“It definitely felt like one.”

“I’m sorry. Thank you, baby. It’s gorgeous.”

“As are you.” Psalm slipped his arms around my back and kissed the top of my head.

“I think I’m speechless.”

“Oh, I’m loving this. You always have something to say.”

“This is so unexpected. I can’t come up with anything.”

“Well, you might not talk for a week after I inform you that the other keys are to the elevator and my penthouse.”

“Psalm, why would I need a key to your house?”

“To get in, of course. You need it in case you get locked out of yours again, or you just miss your man. I’m always missing you, so it’s not like I’m gon’ tell you not to come.”

“You sure about that?”

“Positive.”

“Even when I’m drinking?”

“Especially when you’re drinking. Just make sure you call me to come pick you up.”

“Once again, I don’t know what to say.” I bit back a smile as I gripped the collar of his shirt.

“That smile is the only reward I seek these days. When you’re not around, I sit up and think of ways to make you smile.”

“You’ve been doing an amazing job. I’m still in awe of how our relationship has transformed. You know I used to dread coming to work knowing an angry ogre was there who didn’t want me talking to him.”

“Whole time, I was trying not to scare you away by being a creep.” He winked.

“Are you serious?”

“Hell yeah! I wanted to fuck you on sight. I knew if I tried, I was taking a chance on my brother not having such a good nurse. Even if you went for it, things would have become awkward, or you would have felt like you did something wrong and stopped coming. Syre handpicked you. If I made you quit, that would have been a guaranteed fight.”

“Isn’t that something?” She shook her head slowly.

“I’m glad I showed restraint. It gave me a chance to study you.”

“Wow.” I chuckled.

“Seriously. I figured out your favorite drink. I noticed that you ate a donut every morning. I noticed that you hate Monday morning, but you love what you do. I saw that you prayed over Bishop every morning, and you talked to him when you thought no one else was listening. I noticed that there was someone upsetting you.”

“Aren’t you observant?” I noted.

“Why do you think I send you flowers every Monday?”

“I never thought about it. I guess since it’s the beginning of the week.”

“I figured I could do something to try to brighten your least favorite day of the week. I want to be a bright spot that you can look for when times get dark. That’s what you were to me. You came in like a ray of light at the darkest time of my life. I lost the most important woman in my life, and the strongest person I knew was fighting for his life. There was nothing he could do about it. There was nothing I could do about it. All I could do was be there. I felt so alone. My brother came around, but I felt like I was the only one that understood the gravity of the situation. Bishop was our rock and our constant. If he didn’t wake up…” Psalm shook his head.

I touched his cheek with my hand and tiptoed to meet him as he leaned down and placed his lips on mine. Using the pads of my thumbs, I swiped away his silent tears.

“You’re a good brother, Psalm. They’re lucky to have you.”

“Thank you for being there. I never had to worry about if Bishop was being taken care of properly. I never had to question if you cared because your work spoke for you. As much as I loved seeing you come, I hated to see you go. It felt selfish to want you around knowing that it meant my brother wasn’t better. I can’t believe you got me out here crying, Ny.” Psalm quickly shook his head.

“It’s OK, baby. You’ve been through so much. It’s good to let it all out,” I assured him.

“I don’t do this. I haven’t been smoking like I used to. I’m usually too high to have feelings.” He chuckled softly.

“It’s good to feel. That’s how we process things.”

“I know. Most of the time I don’t want to process or feel things. I like being numb. You unlocked emotions I didn’t even think existed for me. I wanted to feel everything you were unraveling inside me. Every time you walked in the door, my heart skipped a beat. At the same time, I was beating myself up for wanting you around. I couldn’t bring myself to tell you how I felt. How was I going to say I want you here? I couldn’t accept how I was feeling, knowing your presence meant my brother was still in a damn coma. I knew if Bishop didn’t wake up, my life would have never been the same.”

“Thankfully, there’s someone who has the last say. I prayed over him every morning. I could tell that Bishop wasn’t suffering. He was just getting some much-needed rest. I knew it was only a matter of time before he would wake up.”

“I apologize for equating your presence to my brother’s condition. I apologize for being so mean to you.”

“I understand that you were in a difficult position, but I appreciate your apology. It means a lot.”

“I love you for taking care of my brother, Ny. I love you because you showed genuine concern. While you were praying over him, I was praying over you. Not only did I pray that you would take good care of my brother, I also prayed for your peace of mind and that whatever was plaguing you would release you. I could tell you were going through something, but I also knew it wasn’t my place to intervene. I just wanted to see you happy and not constantly arguing and stressed out.”

“Do you understand how amazing you are, Psalm? Yes, Bishop’s situation is what brought me into your life, but you are who and what has kept me here. If you would have expressed your interest in me instead of pushing me away, I probably would have given you a chance.”

Psalm hugged my body to his and kissed the top of my head. “I don’t want to be away from you too long. Go get your key from your girl, get changed, and let’s go on a trip. I want to get your mind off this job search. Can you be back here in two hours?”

“A trip?”

“Yeah. I have a couple of places in mind.”

“OK.” I nodded, deciding to go with the flow.

“Let me know when you make it home. I’m going to set up our flight,” he said, kissing my hands.

“OK. Thank you again, baby. See you in a little bit.”

“Oh, your bank card is in the armrest,” he revealed before turning and walking back to the elevator.

“Bank card? Psalm, what bank card?”

“Stop asking so many questions and go spend my money, Ny. Lord knows I ain’t doing nothing with it,” he stated without bothering to look back before stepping into the elevator.