Chapter 4

Tessa

I tryto ignore the sound of the shower running as I stare out the hotel window. It's dark out, but all of the streetlights are on, and I take a moment to admire how pretty downtown Denver looks like this. Snow twinkles in the light, and I smile. It reminds me of Alaska, even if it is about forty degrees warmer here.

The full moon is tonight and I stare up at the moon. I'm kind of glad that I'm not in Alaska right now. If I were, I'd be stuck in my little apartment and forced to listen to my neighbors going at it all night long. I couldn't even hang out with Elle because I know she's busy with her mate, Niko, right now.

I stare at the full moon as I hear the shower turn off. My body is all tingly, and I know that it must be because I'm picturing a naked and wet Ash. I feel my face flush with a blush, and I try to get my mind out of the gutter as I hear him moving around in the bathroom.

I want him.

Sadness hits me at the thought. I'll never have him. I'm not his fated mate.

I turn away from the window and pull the blinds closed. My eyes fall on the king-size bed, and I look away quickly. Even if I'm not his mate and I know nothing is going to happen tonight between us, I still can't deny that I'm excited to be sleeping with him.

It's the first time I'll be spending the night with a guy, and a little thrill skates down my spine. This is the longest that I've been alone with a guy. In high school, I was the quiet, chubby girl who tried to go through my classes and be as invisible as I could be. Guys didn't look my way, and I liked it that way. I just wanted to do well in school and get a scholarship for college.

I did that, but nothing really changed in college. I would try to date, but no one ever caught my interest. I got asked out a few times, but never accepted any of them. I thought that after college, things would be different, but they weren't. I didn't have to worry about school, but I still had deadlines and being a writer means that I rarely had to leave my apartment. I wasn't getting out to meet people and online dating scared me.

I was happy being alone, or at least that's what I told myself. Until Elle went to Alaska and met Niko.

As soon as my best friend found love, it seemed to light a fire in me. When I met Ash, it was like BANG! Instant attraction.

Too bad for me, it was only on my side.

Ash is the first person I've been attracted to. He's the only one I've ever wanted.

The bathroom door opens, and a plume of steam comes out with Ash. He's got a towel wrapped around his waist, and my mouth drops open as I watch a drop of water run along the column of his neck and down to his chest. The drop gets lost in his chest hair and I blink..

I swallow hard and force my eyes away from his bare chest and up to his eyes. I freeze when I see the look in his eyes. He looks absolutely feral as he stares at me, and I take a step back.

"Ash?" I ask, my voice quivering as he breathes hard. "What's wrong?"

He takes a step toward me, and I back up another step.

"What's going on?" I ask, and I realize that I'm breathing just as hard as he is.

"It's you," he growls, taking another step my way.

"What about me?"

"The mating heat," he snarls, and I swallow hard.

"The… wait. What?" I ask.

I must be dreaming, or maybe I'm just extra tired. There's no way that he just said what I think he said. I mean, that doesn't even make any sense. We're not fated mates.

Are we?

"I-I I thought that shifters only felt the mating heat when they found their fated mates?" I ask, and he nods.

"We do," he confirms. "I have. It's you."

My mind is running a million miles an hour, and I try to process what's happening.

Is it possible that he didn't realize I was his mate until tonight? I mean, maybe, right? All I really know about shifters is from romance books and the little that Elle has told me. When I asked her about shifters and her mate, it was always more about his animal or what it felt like to have a mate. I never asked much about how they knew that they were meant to be together.

Maybe they have to be with their fated mate on the full moon to tell? That would explain why he hasn't claimed me before now.

"I thought that you just had to smell your mate," I murmur, but I'm not sure he's listening to me.

I look at him, and as I stare at him, my body starts to burn.

"The mating heat… can I feel it too?" I ask as my nipples pebble in my bra.

"I think so. The other guys said that their mates could."

"What does it feel like?" I ask as he takes another step towards me.

"Like a burn, a yearning. Like we have to have each other. Like you're insatiable," he says, his voice low and gravely.

I nod. I feel all of those things.

"I want you," I whisper, my body feeling heavier and needy as he closes the distance between us.

"I need you, mate," he whispers, and I nod.

His hands cup my face, and I look up at him.

"Your eyes are glowing," I whisper, and he nods.

"It's my bear."

"Can I see him?" I ask, and he nods.

"He's been dying to meet you too."

He takes a step back and I watch with wide eyes as he starts to pull the towel off. I can feel my face heating with a blush and I stare down at my feet as he lets the damp towel drop to the floor.

"You want to watch?" Ash asks me, and I swallow hard before I look up at him.

He's naked and glorious as he stands before me. His eyes flash, and I swallow hard.

Then, right before my eyes, he starts to change.

His hair grows, and I gasp as his features change, elongating, growing, stretching. He lands on all fours in front of me, his back legs pushing the bed all of the way back to the far wall and I gasp, backing up until my back hits the wall behind me.

His polar bear is huge, much bigger than I was expecting. His fur is so white and I take a deep breath as he inches forward a bit.

I raise my hand, and he bumps his nose against my palm. The action makes me smile and I start to relax and grow more comfortable with being around his polar bear.

"You're a lot bigger than I was expecting."

He pushes his head into my hand and I smile.

"And your fur is softer," I add.

I move to stand alongside him and run my hand along his side. Standing on all fours, I can just barely see over his back. I know that if he was on two legs, he would tower over my small frame.

"This is so cool," I breathe.

I step on the damp towel, and when I look down at it, lust slams into me. The polar bear growls, and I jerk my eyes over to him in time to see Ash shift back to his human form.

"Whoa," I gasp, and he reaches out before I can trip over the towel.

He pulls me into his arms, and I rest my hands on his chest, feeling his heart beating like crazy under my palms.

"Mate," he whispers, and that one word feels like it goes straight to my clit.

"I need you," I whisper back, and he nods.

Then his mouth is on mine.

I blink. All I can think is that this is my first kiss.

Then his tongue is slipping into my mouth and I stop thinking and just start feeling.

He backs me up towards the bed, and I moan as his tongue tangles with mine.

"Going to make you mine," he says against my lips, and I nod.

That's all I want. To be his.

My body is restless, my thighs squeezing together to try to dull the ache that has formed between my legs.

Ash pushes me back, and I gasp as I fall back onto the mattress. He stares down at me with hungry eyes, and I swallow a moan.

"Need to get you naked," he growls, and I nod.

My hands reach for my shirt and I pull it off as Ash grabs my pants and tugs them down my legs. I'm naked in record time, and that's when the nerves manage to burst through my lust.

My hands move to cover my stomach and I reach for the blanket but Ash stops me.

"Fuck, Tessa. You're so goddamn beautiful, mate."

I look at him and I can see that he means it. He's staring at me like I'm the most beautiful thing he's ever seen. Having him look like that puts my fears at bay and I smile up at him.

"Come here," I urge him, and he's on me in a flash.

His mouth lands on mine as his hands explore me, and just like that, I'm lost in him. My hands run over his smooth skin, and I cling to him as his kiss sweeps me away.

I'm dizzy by the time that we come up for air, and I suck in a breath as he kisses his way down my neck and across my breasts.

"So perfect," he murmurs, and my body heats even more under his praise.

I have the strongest urge to beg him. I want to ask him to touch me, lick me, bite me. That last thought feels out of place, but the urge is so strong. It's like I need him to.

"Ash, please," I beg. "I need you to bite me."

"I will, mate. Soon. I need to get you ready for me first."

I whine in the back of my throat, and he groans as he kisses my breasts.

He sucks one of my nipples into his mouth, and I arch against him, gasping at the sensations. He switches to the other nipple, and my eyes fall closed as I let him take care of me.

I feel like a bow strung too tight by the time that he kisses down my stomach and nudges my thighs wider apart.

I peer down my body at the top of his dark head, and he looks up at me, his eyes flashing. He holds eye contact as he leans forward and licks up my center.

"Oh, God," I cry, and he gives me a wicked grin before he buries his face in my pussy.

My head drops back to the mattress, and I fist the sheets beneath me and hang on for dear life as Ash uses his mouth to drive me wild.

I'm already chanting his name, but when he sucks my clit into his mouth, I start to scream.

"Ash!" I cry, and he just moans in response, his mouth moving over me faster and faster. "Oh!" I shout, and my legs clamp shut around his head as I come against his mouth.

I see stars, and my body goes limp on the bed as Ash gives me one last lick and then crawls up my body. I smile dazedly up at him, and he kisses me, letting me taste my release.

His cock nudges my opening, and I spread my legs wider in anticipation.

"Are you ready for me, mate?" He whispers in my ear, and I nod eagerly.

His dick rubs over my clit, and I swear that I almost come again at the brief contact.

"I'm going to bite you," he says, and I nod.

"Yes! Do it."

He nuzzles against my neck, and I hold my breath as his hips press forward slightly. I'm not sure what to focus on; his warm breath on my neck or his thick cock pushing into me.

"Ash, I…" I'm not even sure what I was going to say, but it's cut off as his teeth sink into my neck and he thrusts into me at the same time.

He groans, and I moan.

"Ash!" I cry as I come again, and he growls against my skin.

"Mine. My mate," he snarls, and I nod.

"Yours. Yours."

He starts to move, slowly at first, and then once we find our rhythm his pace picks up. My hips rise, meeting him thrust for thrust, and soon I'm close to coming again.

"Ash," I plead, and he nods.

"I've got you, Tessa."

I stare up into his dark eyes and swear that I've never felt more connected to anyone. No wonder Elle took one look at Niko and agreed to move to Alaska. This feeling, this connection, is addictive.

I want to tell him that I love him and have wanted him from the first time I saw him, but I can't quite get the words out.

He grabs my thigh, hoisting it higher, and we both moan as he sinks even further inside of me.

"Yes!" I cry, and he hammers into me.

"Need you to come again, mate."

"I'm close. So close," I promise, and he reaches between us, his fingers finding my clit.

He rubs the little pearl under his thumb, and I fly over the edge, coming all over his cock. Ash chokes on my name, following me over, and I smile as I feel him come inside of me.

I want to ask him what happens now. I want to ask him more about shifters and their fated mates and why he only just realized we were mates, but I don't do any of that.

Instead, Ash pulls out of me, and my eyes drift shut.

I'm fast asleep a minute later.