Chapter 10

Tessa

When Elle showsup at my apartment, I'm happy to see her.

Then I see the look on her face, and my stomach drops.

"What's wrong?" I ask her, dragging her into my place.

"It's Ash," she says, and panic grips me.

"What happened?" I choke out.

"He was shot."

"Shot!" I shout.

Out of all of the things that she could have said, Ash being shot wasn't even on my radar.

"Shot," I whisper, and the next thing I know, Elle is wrapping her arms around me.

"I think that he's okay. He's at the hospital. We have to go," she tells me gently, and I nod.

I feel like I'm frozen as I stand there, but she tugs me after her, snapping me out of my fog a bit.

"How was he shot? What happened?" I ask her as we climb into her car.

"I don't know. Niko just called and told me that he was hurt, that he had been shot, and that Flint was taking him to the hospital. He must have been out on a patrol."

I nod along. My body feels numb, and all I can think about is how stupid I've been by pushing him away. All I'm doing is wasting more of our time together. Instead of pushing him away, I need to talk to him, tell him how I feel, and we can work towards fixing things between us.

"He's going to be okay, Tessa. He's a shifter. They heal fast," Elle reassures me, and I sniffle, dashing at the tears on my cheeks.

"I've been so stupid and petty," I admit, and she reaches out, squeezing my hand.

We pull into the parking lot of the hospital a minute later, and I see Niko and the guys rushing toward the front doors.

"Come on. Let's catch them," Elle says as she hurries out of the car.

I'm quick to follow her, and we jog through the snow-covered parking lot towards the front doors.

"Niko!" Elle calls, and her mate stops and spins to face us.

"Any news?" I ask the guys as we catch up to them.

"No, I haven't been able to get ahold of Flint yet."

"Fifth floor," Alec says as he checks his phone.

We head for the elevator and ride in tense silence up to the fifth floor. I can hear Elle and Niko whispering to each other, but I'm too distracted to pay attention to what they're saying.

Please be alright, please be alright,I repeat over and over again to myself.

"This way," Alec says, pointing down the hall. We all follow him over to a little waiting room where Flint is anxiously pacing back and forth.

"What happened?" I choke out, and Flint gives me a sympathetic look.

"There were hunters, and they were shooting at God knows what. They hit Ash in the shoulder."

"Hunters! Was he… shifted?" I whisper, and Flint shakes his head.

"No. The hunters shouldn't have been shooting there. We were still on the resort's property."

"Did you catch them?" Elle asks Niko, and he nods.

"Yeah, and you'll never guess who it was," he says and I frown.

"We know them?"

"One of them at least. It was Randy Miller."

My stomach drops and Elle and I share a shocked look.

"It was him and his brother. Randy was ranting about Ash stealing his girl when he grabbed him. We dropped them off at the station in town and came here. The Alphas are going to deal with them… once they sober up."

"They were drunk?" I ask in surprise, and he nods grimly.

"Yeah, they were wasted. We're lucky that they didn't shoot anyone else or kill anyone."

"I can't believe that Randy…" I trail off and Elle nods.

"Me either. I guess it's a good thing that Ash went with you to Colorado. Lord knows what he had planned at the signing," Elle adds.

"It's not good for Ash! He was shot," I argue and she winces.

"I didn't mean it like that," she says and I shake my head.

"I know. I'm sorry, I'm just stressed. How was Ash when they brought him in?" I ask, my eyes straying over to the surgery doors.

"He passed out. They said that he lost a lot of blood; they probably hit an artery. Hopefully, they can get the bullet out, and then his polar bear will be able to help."

I nod, and Elle takes my hand, leading me over to a chair. I'm not sure how long we sit there before a doctor walks out, giving us a tired smile.

"For Ash Martin?" he asks, and I leap to my feet.

"Is he okay?"

"He's stable now and should be out of the anesthesia soon. He'll need to rest for a bit, but I'm confident he'll make a full recovery in the next few days."

I see the doctor's eyes flash, and I know he's a shifter too. I start to relax and lean back against Elle.

"Can we see him?" I ask, and he nods.

"For a little bit. Visiting hours end soon."

"Tessa, you go back," Flint says, surprising me.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, you're who he is going to want to see when he wakes up."

The other guys nod, and I look at Elle. She gives me a smile, nodding for me to go and I turn and follow the doctor down the hallway and into Ash's room.

The lights are mostly off, and I move over to the side of his bed.

"Let us know if you need anything," the doctor says before he turns to leave, and I nod.

"Thanks."

He smiles kindly before he turns and heads out of the room. I turn back to Ash and take him in. He looks pale and so fragile as he lays in the hospital bed.

"I'm sorry," I whisper as I take his hand in mine. I wish I hadn't pushed you away. I wish you had opened up to me and that things were different."

His eyes flutter and I tense, waiting to see if he wakes up. He blinks his eyes open a moment later and his eyes meet mine.

"Mate," he says, his voice low and rough.

"How are you feeling?"

"Sore. Tired."

I nod.

"Did they get the guys?" He asks, and I nod again.

"Yeah, they're downtown at the station. They said they were drunk."

"Idiots," Ash growls, and I nod.

"At least they've been arrested."

He nods, and we stare at each other for a second.

"I'm sorry," he says finally, and I blink.

"I'm sorry, too."

"It's my fault. You have nothing to apologize for. I'm the idiot who pushed you away, who refused to talk to you and just told you what was going on with me and my childhood. I should have just trusted you from the beginning. I mean, I know you're a good person and trustworthy, but I just let my insecurities get in the way."

"Ash," I say, but he shakes his head.

"Let me get this out. Please."

I nod, and he takes a deep breath.

"My family… growing up… it wasn't great for me," he finally says, and I nod, squeezing his hand in mine. "My mom left my dad when I was pretty young. I don't really remember her all that much, but I thought we were happy and then one day, she was just gone. I never saw her again."

"I'm sorry, Ash. I can't imagine abandoning my kid or husband like that."

"Me either, but she did."

We're silent as he gathers his thoughts, and I wait for him to go on. I can see how much remembering this and talking about it pains him. I wish we didn't have to talk about it, but I want to understand him better, and I think it might help Ash to open up to someone.

"Her leaving killed my dad. He just became this shell. He never smiled again. He never wanted to do anything. He went to work, or he went to the bar, but that was it. I basically raised myself after she left. I lost both of my parents that day," he tells me.

He clears his throat and my heart squeezes in my chest.

"My mom was human. I grew up in a town with humans and I watched my human friends' parents get divorced. I guess I just internalized that, and being with a human just seemed like a mistake. Being with anyone was a gamble, but if I was mated to a human, I was so sure that I was going to wind up like my dad, and I didn't want that. I couldn't be like him. I just couldn't."

"You're not," I promise him as I lean forward and grab his hand..

"I am. Look at me. Before you, I went to work and home. I had no life."

"You have a life. You have friends, a family here."

"I'm lonely, Tessa. I have been for a while, but I've been lying to myself and pretending like I'm happy. Like I have everything I need, but that was a lie. I need you."

Tears sting my eyes, and I swallow hard.

"I'm sorry for pushing you this afternoon. I shouldn't have. I'll wait the ninety-seven days for you. I'll wait as long as you need me to," he tells me, and tears spill onto my cheeks.

"I just want you to feel safe in this relationship. I know that it might not seem like it, but I'm all in with you, Tessa. I have been since I claimed you. I mean, even before then, I was obsessed with you. I was fighting with my head, but my polar bear and my heart already knew what I needed. I should have listened."

I swipe at the tears, and he tightens his grip on my hand.

"I'm sorry, mate. I was an idiot, and I kept you at arm's length because I was scared that you would leave me if I gave in to our mating bond. Now I'm terrified that you won't forgive me and you'll never be mine. I need you, Tessa. I love you."

I sob, scooting my chair closer to his bed.

"I love you too. I forgive you. I get it. I mean, when I found out what you did, I kind of did the same thing. We were both just trying to protect our hearts."

He tugs on my hand, and I climb up onto the bed.

"I don't want to hurt you," I protest, and he shakes his head.

"I need you closer. Come here."

I lay down on my side next to him and rest my head on his chest.

"How's your shoulder?" I ask him.

"It's healing already. It will probably be all better by tomorrow."

"Lucky. I wish that I could heal that fast."

"You can now that I've claimed you. You get some of my properties. It won't be as fast as me, but it will be faster than a normal human."

"That's cool."

We're silent as we cuddle, and he rubs his hand up and down my back.

"I love you, Tessa. I'm yours," he says, and I smile as I cuddle closer to him.

"I know. I love you, too. I'm yours."

He relaxes next to me, and I smile as I close my eyes and listen to the steady beat of Ash's heart until I fall asleep.