Chapter 5

Hailey

It’s been four days and no Derek. He hasn’t shown up at the bar. He hasn’t returned my calls, and when I texted him, he just wrote me that he was busy dealing with club business. I feel like such an idiot. Here I was thinking that things were going to be different now, that I was going to be the priority, but man, did I overshoot that assumption. If Derek wants to be with me, then he’s going to have to not only work on his communication skills, but get his priorities straight.

I deliver the drinks to one of my tables and check around to see if anyone else looks like they could use another round. When the front entrance opens, my body freezes in place. The man I’ve been holding my breath for has finally shown up, looking even hotter than ever in his low-hung, light-washed jeans with a white V-neck T-shirt and leather jacket. Mmmm…I want to pounce on him and have a repeat of the other night, but I don’t. Why? Because he’s not alone. A girl, pretty enough to be a centerfold, is attached to his side with her arms locked around his. The two of them looking awfully cozy to just be casual friends.

His eyes collide with my stare, and instead of him giving me a smile, or coming to say hi, or doing anything to make me think that I’m reading too much into the situation between him and the one braced against him, he just tips his head at me and walks her over to his usual table. They both take a seat with the other Savage Knights, and I take a giant breath of air since mine had been sucked away by the succubus of the horrible nightmare unfolding in front of me.

I guess I have my answer now. What happened between us the other night meant nothing. If my brother were here now, he’d be saying I told you so. Bentley was right when he said Derek would only hurt me. He just did.

I turn and walk back to the bar, trying not to sink to the floor. The pain in my chest is threatening to bring me to tears, but I refuse to go down like that. I grab two glasses and fill them with ice water and place them on my tray. I turn and stack napkins. Then coasters. Clean around the garnish tray. Trying to busy myself with anything I can find to keep myself together.

How could he? How could he lead me on and then ditch me like that? How could he make it seem like I’m his whole world and then treat me like I mean nothing to him? He may not see me like a sister anymore, but he should still care about me enough not to hurt me. Honestly, I don’t know this person anymore. The person he’s become. Grit. The Savage Knight. I don’t know him. Because the Derek I once knew would never have done anything to break me. The Derek I knew spent his days trying to pull me out of the rubble of my depression and put a smile on my face.

The grief and hurt begin to churn into anger. Betrayal coursing through my veins like nails. I grab my tray and turn, walking over to their table and placing the glasses of water down. One in front of the man who broke my heart for the final time, and the other in front of the gorgeous girl who is so pretty RiffRaff is even mesmerized by her. The way Riff is staring at her right now, I’d say he wants her for himself.

“Thank you,” she says, and her voice is just as pretty as her face. And of course, she’s polite, too. “I’m JoeJoe, by the way. Johanna Joan Price to be exact.” She giggles and holds out her hand for me to shake. And as much as I don’t want to take it, I’m not going to be rude. I may be jealous as hell, but this is not her fault. She is not to be blamed for Grit’s behavior. I just wonder if the two of them were together when he and I made out the other night. Because if so, then he’s not only an asshole but he’s also a lying, cheating scumbag.

“I’m Hailey.” I shake her hand, hoping she doesn’t feel how badly I’m trembling. “Can I get you anything to drink?” I release her quickly and take out my notepad, looking down at the paper so I don’t have to look into her beautiful, friendly blue eyes anymore. No wonder Grit is taken by her.

“I’ll have a vodka soda,” she answers.

I write her order down even though I’m sure it will be forever burned in my memory. “And for you, Grit?” I keep my eyes locked on the words I just wrote, tracing over the letter v until the ink is bleeding through the paper.

“Bourbon, double.”

His voice rumbles through me, and I want to scream at my traitorous body for reacting to it. I look up toward the other men to see if anyone else could use another drink, and notice the tension that’s settled over the table. It’s as if Grit’s arrival isn’t welcomed. I know I’d be happy if he left. Then I might actually be able to get through the night without breaking.

“You guys need anything? Another beer, Trig?”

Trigger nods and gives me a wink. “Yeah, babe. I need another.”

Axle says he’s all set, and when I turn to RiffRaff, I find him still staring at JoeJoe. “And you, Riff?” I ask, trying to get his attention. Finally, he turns.

“Yeah, I do need something, pretty girl. I need some company tonight. You want to spend some time with me after you get off work?”

Riff’s question catches me by surprise. Not the question itself, but the fact that it’s laced with motive. I can hear it in the strain of his voice and see it in the hard lines etched around his eyes, and in the tightness of his jaw. Usually, he’s the most easygoing one of the bunch, yet right now, he seems angry, and I’m guessing it has to do with the girl sitting between him and Grit.

I wonder if she’s his ex-girlfriend and now Grit has stepped in and claimed her for himself. Or maybe, Grit stole her from him and that’s the reason Riff looks like he wants to break something. Either way, it’s obvious Riff’s using me to cope with or distract himself from whatever the situation is. Whether the man’s trying to make her jealous or send some kind of message to the two of them, doesn’t bother me, because I’m about to use him too.

“Sure, Riff. I’d love to. Are you going to take me to the clubhouse so I can finally see where the magic happens?”

A growl rumbles from the man to my left, but I refuse to pay him any mind. Grit doesn’t want me so I can do as I choose, and he can take his “overprotective dad” act and shove it where the sun don’t shine.

“Oh, pretty girl, there’s only one place where the magic happens. It’s in my room. And I’ll definitely be giving you the full tour.” Riff winks, giving me a charming smile, but there isn’t a single flutter in my stomach. I’m just playing a part here. We both are playing roles, so no magic will be happening between us. Once we’re back at the clubhouse, I’ll confess to him what my intentions were. I may not want a fuck buddy, but I definitely could use a friend.

“Looking forward to it.” I wink, giving him a sexy little grin of my own, trying to play my part with perfection. “Now, do you want anything more to drink right now?”

He shakes his head. “Nah, babe. I’m going to save myself for later. There’s only one thing I want to drink.”

This time, Grit is over the table and has Riff by his neck. He looks like he’s ready to kill him, and Riff doesn’t even blink. He’s not fazed at all by the lethal looking man. “You have a problem, Grit?” Riff asks, sounding impassive, as if taunting the beast.

“She’s fucking off-limits, and you know it. Club rules. So unless you want to pay for your crime, then I suggest you back the fuck off.”

Oh, right. This is the whole sergeant at arms thing they were talking about. Grit is the enforcer of the MC laws. I’m just wondering how that has anything to do with me.

“I assumed you took back your claim, seeing as you brought Joe out tonight. Correct me if I’m wrong, but it looks to me like you’ve moved on, which means Hailey is now fair game.”

What the hell? Claim? Moved on? Fair game? There was nothing to move on from, because apparently, Grit never started anything. Though it sure felt like he had.

I’m done with this pissing contest and ready to give the jerk a piece of my mind because he’s way out of line. “I’m right here, guys, and I can speak for myself. Grit doesn’t have any claim on me. I’m single. So as far as I’m concerned, that doesn’t make me off-limits.” I turn my eyes toward Grit, who looks like he’s about to blow a gasket. “And as far as we’re concerned, Grit, I’m nothing to you. So back the fuck off and let me live my life now. You’re clearly living yours.”

I glance over at JoeJoe before I storm away from the table and right out the door. I’m in desperate need of air. It’s suffocating being inside the same room as him. Before anyone can bear witness to my emotional breakdown, I walk around toward the back of the building.

“What the fuck was that, Hailey?” Grit’s livid tone makes me jump and only enrages me further.

I turn and cross my arms, blocking myself off from him— though it does nothing to strengthen my heart. “What the fuck was what?” He’s not the one who should be angry right now. And he’s not the boss of me. Once upon a time, he was my caretaker, but now, I’m all grown up and he has no say in what I do or who I do it with.

“You have a thing for Riff now?”

Really? He’s going to act all jealous and territorial when he’s the one who showed up with a girl tonight and practically rubbed his relationship in my face. If this was him trying to send the message he’s not interested in me, then I received it loud and clear.

“So what if I do, Grit? I’m twenty-two and single. And Riff’s a great guy. I don’t see the problem.”

He steps right into my face, looking down with steel in his eyes.

“The problem is he’s no good for you.”

Right! I guess I was mistaken. Jealousy isn’t at play here. He’s back in the overprotective dad mode now.

“I don’t care about good right now, Grit. I’m looking for bad. Very, very bad.”

He leans down even closer. The fury outlined in all of his features has me taking a step back, trying to put distance between us before I climb his body and beg him to choose me instead of the girl he has inside. His smell is already invading my senses, and when he’s close, I can’t think straight. He follows my every move until my back is up against the wall and his arms are bracing me in. There’s nowhere for me to go. No escaping the torment of my need.

“I need to get back inside to my tables,” I state. “People are waiting on their orders.”

“You’re not going anywhere until we’re done, Hailey.”

“We are done, Grit. Now, you should get back to your…”

“Stop fucking calling me that!” he snaps, cutting me off.

“Why? I thought it’s what you went by now?” It’s the name all of his brothers call him, so I don’t see the problem.

“No. To you, I’m Derek. To all the other asses in the world, I’m Grit, understood?”

I shake my head. I really don’t understand, and that’s the problem. If he actually cared about me, he wouldn’t have done what he did. He toyed with my emotions; only to stomp on them and drag me right back into the pit of pain and disappointment. I’m done. I’m done with him, and I’m done with this conversation. I really just want to get back inside so I can go nurse my wounds in private.

“I’ll call you whatever you want if you just move and let me get back to work.”

“I’m not moving until you tell me what the hell that was about in there. Do you have a thing for Riff?”

“Why do you even care?” I try to push out from under his hold, but he doesn’t budge. “Your date is still waiting on her drink, so I should really get back in.” Maybe the reminder of the beautiful girl inside will get the dick to move.

“Answer. The. Fucking. Question.” He seethes every word like he’s a ticking time bomb about to detonate. God, he’s so damn infuriating.

“No! Fine. Are you happy? I don’t have a thing for him. But that doesn’t mean I couldn’t. And tonight, I’m—”

He cuts me off again. “The answer is and will always be NO. Do you know why, babe?” His head drops closer, eyes peering deeper, and my knees grow weaker. “Because you’re mine. You are mine and no one else’s. No one is going to touch you. Not Riff. And not any other fucker out there. Do you understand me? This body is mine.”

His hand begins to trail down the full length of my side, and a shudder runs down my spine, reverberating against my clit. It’s amazing how one simple touch can detonate the bomb inside me and obliterate the anger. Thankfully, I’ve got one tiny thread of good judgement left. I will never be someone’s side piece, and there’s someone waiting on him.

“Really? Doesn’t seem that way when you show up with a date.” My words are strong, but my body is growing weaker as his fingers brush along my bare thigh, teasing across my skin.

“Joe is just a friend, baby. Nothing more.”

Just a friend.My heart begins to beat again. Slowly, but steadily. And I finally give into the flutters tightening my lower stomach.

“So why were you acting so distant when you came in tonight?”

He shakes his head. “Because I was trying to keep my distance from you. But look how good I’m doing at that.” He leans down and brushes his lips against my cheek, kissing his way down to my neck. “Joe was supposed to be my armor tonight, baby. She was supposed to keep me from making a mistake. Like the one I’m making right now.”

The moan purrs from my throat as he sucks on the sensitive part right below my ear. My body starts to squirm in his hold, needing him to give me a repeat of the other night. “Why is this a mistake, Derek? It feels too good to be a mistake.”

“Sure fucking does,” he growls, tugging the soft part of my ear between his teeth, sending a shiver of heat over my clit. “But your brother thinks you deserve better, and I know he’s right. You deserve so much better than me, my darling girl, but I can’t seem to stay away, can I? It took me all of three fucking minutes to cave.” His tongue teases over me, twisting me up in the heat.

“I’m a big girl now, Derek. And you and Bentley are going to have to start accepting my choices. You especially, because I choose you.”

“Babe…” He suddenly pulls back, pinning me with those dark, heavily heated eyes. “You can’t make that kind of decision unless you’re informed. You need to know why Bentley hates me. You need to know why he thinks I’m no good for you. Once you hear my truth, you may change your mind about how you feel about me.”

I shake my head. Nothing Derek could tell me would change my opinion about him because I know who the man before me is. I know how good his heart is. And I know he would never hurt me.

“Okay, so tell me everything.” I lean forward, placing a kiss over his heart before resting my chin on the spot, waiting for whatever he needs to get off his chest.

“Because the bastard who donated his sperm on my behalf, the one who beat my head in anytime the mood caught him right, went missing. Your brother was the officer called by the drug whore of a woman who gave birth to me to investigate, and Bentley suspects foul play. He’s not na?ve to the truth of what happened to that fucker. Because of that, he now thinks I’m a cold-blooded killer. I’d claim self-defense, but we’d all know that’d be a lie. That’s why, baby girl. That’s why I’m not good enough for you.”

Good. I’m glad the bastard is dead.

It’s the only thought that comes to mind. Maybe I should be horrified that Derek could take another man’s life, but the man he killed, deserved it. I remember every time Derek showed up at our house barely able to stand, bleeding from his entire handsome face. And I remember the wailing sobs that used to come from the basement in the middle of the night. I wanted to go down and take all his pain away, but I was young and scared and didn’t understand what had happened. It wasn’t until one of our phone conversations while I was away at school that I learned the truth.

“I don’t understand.” I shake my head. “Bentley knows how evil your father was and what he did to you.” There’s no way my brother would want that awful man breathing free.

“Baby, your brother is a good man and a good cop. He wanted justice to be served, but he wanted it handled by the law. Having that bastard sit in jail for a few years and then get off on good fucking behavior was not enough, so I dealt with him. And because of that, Bentley thinks I’m too dangerous for you to be around. He believes you can do better than being with a murderer, and whether I want to accept that or not, he’s right.”

I slide my hands up his chest, reaching for his gorgeous face. His loving eyes captured my heart when I was too young to understand the depth of the meaning of the word love. He and my brother are wrong.

“I think I deserve to be with a man who will love and protect me with his life, Derek.” This man would take a bullet for me without even blinking an eye. He’s always been my safe haven. This crime against the monster who deserved exactly what he got doesn’t change that. “I think I deserve to be with a man who makes me feel like I’m home with just the sound of his voice. I want to be with the man who chases all of my sadness away.”

I lean up onto my toes and brush my lips against the scruff of his beard, continuing to pour out my heart, hoping that my love is soaking in and drowning out his doubt. “I deserve to be with the man who has helped me through the hardest times of my life. I deserve to be with the person I love with all of my heart. Despite all the horrible things that happened in your life, Derek, you still showed up for me. You still went out of your way to make me smile even though you were hurting from the bruises on your face and the wounds in your heart. I want to spend my life with the man who became my family when I lost mine. I want you, Derek. I choose you. But the truth is…” I take his hand and place it over my heart. “I don’t have a choice in the matter because it’s already done. My heart and soul will never belong to another because I’m yours. I’ve been yours for a really long time.”

“Baby.” His voice is rasped with the same emotion I see glistening in his eyes, and it catches fire, causing my own tears to slip down my cheeks. “I won’t make you choose between us. Me and Bentley. I’d rather walk away than let you lose your brother.”

I shake my head at the silly man because that’s never going to happen. “So for now, we make this about us.” I run my fingers along his scruff, feeling the coarseness tickle my nerves, making me desperate for a kiss. “And when the time is right, I’ll deal with my brother.”

He tugs me closer, his thumbs sweeping across my cheeks, wiping away my tears. “I don’t want you to have to keep things from him or lie to him, babe. I’m not asking you to do that. I won’t ask you to do that.”

“You’re not asking.” I lean in, brushing my lips across his sensitive skin. “And that’s one of the reasons I love you. But I am asking, Derek. I’m asking for time. To just be able to enjoy this, to enjoy us for right now without me having to fight with him about it. Because you and I both know how stubborn he can be.”

He whistles low. He knows exactly what I’m talking about. My brother can be as hardheaded as they come.

“I love you, baby girl. And if this is what you want, then I’m all in. But like I said, if it comes down to making a choice, I’m walking away before you two lose each other. Understood?”

And, again, this is the reason I love this man.

“Are you going to kiss me already, Derek?” I ignore his comment. It’s not going to come down to a choice. Because in spite of Bentley being hardheaded at times, he loves me and would never abandon me like that. Although, he may very well give me a headache of grief about it for a few months, and right now, I’m not interested in dealing with that.

His mouth quirks up in a sly grin as he wraps his hands around my neck. “I think because of that little stunt you pulled inside with Riff, I should make you wait a bit longer.”

I swear I’m going to hurt him. My eyes narrow. But before I can smart off, his mouth crashes down on mine. I reach out, clinging to his chest, holding on before my weak knees take me down. This is what I’ve been dreaming about for years, the fantasy I played out as I kissed my pillow in the dark, and now, it’s finally happening.

His mouth begins making its demands. His tongue licking its way inside and twisting me up in the heat. Its smooth and sexy, and singes me from head to toe with need. I thought our first kiss would be awkward like you always see on TV, but it’s like our mouths are in sync, like they know exactly what the other needs.

All too soon, his tongue retreats. His teeth tugging at my lower lip before he pulls away and releases me, and I’m whimpering at the loss. “Damn, baby. Where the fuck did you learn to kiss like that?”

I want to sound cool and say I’ve had a lot of practice, but I’ve had none. Zilch. That was my first kiss, and I’m so thankful I waited to share it with Derek, because I doubt any others would have compared.

“My pillow,” I tease, playing off the truth in that statement.

“Wait.” He tips my chin up, peering in closer with those intense eyes. “Are you saying that was your first kiss?”

I nod, because the shock on his face is making me nervous.

“Damn, babe. You have no idea what knowing that does to me. Does that mean I was the first one to touch you the other night? The first guy to make you go off in those little panties of yours?”

My cheeks heat, feeling the embarrassment of how inexperienced I am. I’m probably the only twenty-two-year-old in this town who’s not only a virgin but has also never messed around with anyone before.

“Goddamn, babe. You’re too fucking good for me.” He grips my waist and practically growls into my neck as he moves in. “You’re mine. Every single damn inch of this perfect body is only going to know one mans touch.” He nips at my skin, sending tingles everywhere. “I’m going to worship your pussy and make you never crave for anything, my darling girl. I will show you exactly what this sinful body was made for.”

His fingers travel up my hip, teasing along my side, leaving me trembling with anticipation as they inch closer to my breasts. When his palm squeezes over me, my panties get soaked. “These tits are fucking unbelievable. And they’re fucking mine.” My back arches on a moan as he tweaks my tight nipple, setting off a fire of desperation. I’m panting and struggling to catch my breath, practically begging as his hands begin their journey down my stomach, right over the zipper of my shorts. Inching lower. “And this perfect little cunt”—he shoves his hand between my thighs, cupping me in a tight grasp—“is MINE.”

Finally, the pressure is where I need it. His palm presses down, rubbing against the overheated spot, and his name groans from my lips.

“That’s right. You know who you belong to. I can feel how wet you are for me, baby. Your shorts are soaked.” His worshipful grunt has me making more of a mess of myself. He grinds his palm down, applying more pressure, and my hips buck up as the tingles run through.

“Derek, I need more.” I need the ache to stop. It’s almost to the point of pain.

“Not to worry, darling girl. I’m going to give you exactly what you need.” His deft fingers work to unfasten my shorts, jerking them down my thighs. The eagerness rolling off him is just as intense as the eagerness pulsing between my legs. He rubs his hand over my wet panties, gliding through my folds, building the tension to an excruciating state. His mouth comes crashing forward, demanding another scorching kiss. His groans rolling over my tongue. Fingers rolling over my panty-covered clit.

My eyes fly open as he suddenly pulls away on a grunt. The demand for more dies on my tongue as I see him staring between my legs, laser focused and looking like he’s famished. His finger pulls my panties to the side, and for the first time ever, I’m exposed to a man. I thought I’d be shy or embarrassed, but I feel sexy from the way his eyes burn with desire and his tongue runs along his lower lip.

“You’re fucking perfect, baby.” I claw at his chest, needing him to stop staring and start enjoying. I can’t take it anymore. “You want me to pet her, babe? You want me to pet this pretty little pussy and make her purr for me?”

“Yes, Derek,” I beg, loving how he speaks to me. “Touch me.”

He reaches forward, and his thumb runs down the length of me, starting with my clit and parting my folds on its way down to my entrance. I let out another whimper when it’s suddenly gone, but thankfully, he doesn’t make me wait long. He places two fingers against my swollen nub and begins pressing down with just the right amount of pressure and circles it. “She likes that, doesn’t she?” His voice comes out strained and raspy and is the sexiest sound I’ve ever heard. I nod since the words struggle to form. Nothing other than moans of pleasure are coming to mind.

“She’s all puffed up and soft. Begging to be rubbed.” He runs his two thick fingers through my folds, giving me a very thorough massage. “Begging to be sucked on.”

“Yes!” I manage to cry out. That word definitely coming to mind now. I want his mouth on me, licking and sucking. It’s been something I’ve imagined while I’ve played with myself, and I’m dying to know what it really feels like.

“My sweet little girl has been denied for way too long, hasn’t she?”

“Uh-huh.” I nod as his fingers press into me. They’re so thick I feel full. If that’s how it feels with just fingers, I can’t imagine what it will feel like when he’s filling me with his cock because I can tell that thing is huge. By the size of his bulge nearly breaking through his zipper, I know he’s massive.

“Oh, fuck. She feels good. So damn tight and slick. Such a sweet little thing. Isn’t she?” His grunt has me juicing all over his fingers. “So fucking perfect. I’m going to lick all this sweetness right off you, baby. You want that? You want my mouth on you?”

“Yes, Derek. I want it more than anything.”

He drops to his knees, and my panties are torn from my body. He leans in and nuzzles my overheated skin with his nose and lips. His urgency and need matching my pounding heart. “She’s so soft and pretty. And she’s fucking mine.”

His smooth lips start rubbing and brushing over my clit. When he sucks me into his mouth, I nearly crash into my orgasm. I slump forward, struggling to hold onto his shoulders as his lips suction around my clit, pulling the pleasure tight. It’s so good. Too good, and I’m about to shatter.

His fingers join in while he suctions me between his lips. Those thick pads rubbing over my folds and down to my entrance. Two long digits slowly ease right inside my entrance, and every nerve sizzles and clenches as he begins pumping, slow and steady. The pressure of being filled along with his flattened tongue running up and down my slit, passing over my clit with each stroke, is building me to my breaking point.

On his next sweep over my sensitive nub, I grip his head and hold him to the spot. That’s where I need his mouth right now. One more slow draw on my puffed-out clit and I’m going over. Derek takes the hint. An animal sound grumbles from him as he licks fast and hard. When his entire mouth consumes the spot and gives a good long suctioning pull, I’m careening into the most incredible sensation of my life.

Never, ever, has it been that good by myself. Now I’m ruined. Masturbating will never be enough from here on out because now I’ve had perfection. He continues to kiss me, gently licking through my slit, easing me back down, but I swear another orgasm hits. After he settles me back to coherency, draining the final wave of pleasure from my trembling body, he stands.

“Damn, baby. You even taste like cherries.” His lips press to mine, and I taste myself on his tongue. The combined flavor of the two of us has me gripping his neck and trying to swallow him whole. I want to devour him. I want to kiss him until my lips are too swollen and numb to even talk. The man definitely knows how to kiss all of my lips.

“Baby,” he groans. “You probably need to get back inside.”

I shake my head, not letting him go. “No! I don’t want to go. I want to play more.”

He chuckles, and his beard tickles my chin. “I’ll let you play after you get off work. And then tomorrow, I’ll let you play all damn day. How does that sound?”

“Mmm….sounds like it’s a date, and I can’t wait.”

He grins against my mouth, giving me one more sensually hot kiss. “Yeah, I can’t fucking wait either, babe.”