Chapter 15

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“ H arper Eleanor Davis, twenty-eight years old. Received her degree in medicine from Harvard University, graduated with top honors, and worked at several local hospitals before joining the Army.”

I stood in the captain’s office, the place where they slapped a ‘HQ’ sign on it just to make us all feel better about ourselves, rigid as a fucking board.

There was a half-dead plant in the corner, looking like it was suffering as much as we were. The walls were decorated with some bullshit certificates, medals, and a picture of him shaking hands with some old dude in a suit, probably some politician who doesn’t know his ass from his elbow.

I crossed my arms tightly over my chest, as he pored over Red’s file, wishing I was anywhere else but here. His eyes skimmed the pages, his voice taking on a more authoritative edge, as he read aloud the details of her background.

“Four months of active duty serving in the US Army Medical Corps as a trauma surgeon, all in the Middle East. No reports of misconduct.”

Captain Prickface, whose face was a roadmap of deep creases and bullet wounds, sat at his desk, flipping through Red’s file with a look of boredom on his face. He had a bald patch that he was trying to comb over, making him look even more ridiculous. The scraggly beard that he hadn’t bothered trimming in weeks didn’t help his case either. The only thing that made him look halfway decent was that cold, intense stare of his, but even that wasn’t doing him any favors now.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what’s a Harvard-trained doctor doing working for a private military company?” he asked with a frown.

Red took an eternity to answer, her eyes darting around like a caged animal. I was aware that she was running from something, but I didn’t have a clue what it was. All I knew was that she needed to get the hell out of that camp she had come from.

“The pay,” she answered with complete indifference.

If the captain was pissed off before, this certainly wasn’t helping. “You chose to be here because it pays better than the HCA [1] ?” he asked, as if not quite believing her.

Red shrugged, her physiognomy still neutral. “It’s a tough economy, sir,” she replied, her answer as straightforward as her attitude.

Captain Dickhead looked like he was trying to decide whether or not to believe her story. His gaze shifted towards me, his eyebrows furrowing as he directed his question towards me.

“I still do not understand why you think we need an extra doctor here, Lieutenant,” he sounded like he was questioning my sanity. “Especially since there are plenty of qualified doctors back at main camp.”

Red looked like she was on the verge of puking her fucking guts out and I cursed silently, having to come up with an excuse on the fly.

I was caught between a rock and a hard place.

“I think it’s best if we have an extra set of hands, especially considering how small my task force is,” I said in a way that wasn’t exactly rude, but neither polite.

The captain’s eyebrow shot up, but it was too late. I’d said it, and now I had to run with it.

“Having an extra doctor will not only ease the burden on our current medical staff, but it will also ensure that we have the expertise we need to keep our team in fighting shape.”

I knew it was a stretch, but I had to sell it. Red’s expertise in the field wasn’t exactly well-documented, but I had seen her in action, and I knew she had what it took to save lives under the most fucked-up circumstances.

“Usually, this kind of transfer takes weeks, if not months, Lieutenant,” he affirmed, rubbing his chin. “Speeding it up would require my personal involvement.”

I could see it in his gaze, the recognition that what I had just asked him was a personal favor, a debt that he wouldn’t let me forget, one that would undoubtedly come back to bite my ass in the future.

I had made a promise to Red, and I intended to keep it, even if it meant owing the captain a favor that would hang over me like a goddamn sword of Damocles. He was no fool, and he knew damn well the weight of the request I had just made.

“Are you sure she’s worth the trouble?” he asked, turning to face me once again.

The captain was a grizzled old bastard with a long history of sending men to their graves, that wouldn’t hesitate to cash in on that favor when the time was right.

I’d just signed up for a future of twisted obligations, and when he came knocking, I’d have no choice but to comply.

“Sir,” I replied, in the most professional demeanour I could muster, “with all due respect, there isn’t a soldier alive worth more than a good doctor.”

A low chuckle rumbled in captain’s chest, a sound that was equal parts sinister and satisfied. He smiled knowingly, as if realizing that he now had me right where he wanted to.

“If you vouch for her abilities, I’ll give it a shot. But remember, if this backfires, it’s on you.”

Oh, how the tables have turned.

“Of course, sir.”

Captain Wannabe just stared at me for a moment, his expression almost seeming to tell me ‘you are going to regret this’.

“Alright, Lieutenant. We’ll see how this plays out. But for now, she can sleep in your quarters. We don’t have time to make arrangements for her tonight.”

Red shot me a look that could’ve killed. Her lips curled into a tight grimace, and she took a hesitant step back, as if trying to put some distance between us.

The feeling was mutual.

“Is that really necessary?” she asked, not bothering to hide her irritation.

I sure as hell didn’t want to babysit Red, and her smart-ass mouth didn’t help her case either. I had my own demons to wrestle with, and I didn’t need the added burden of someone else’s shit weighing me down.

Shit, I could really use a drink.

Capt. just gave her a hard look in return, clearly not happy with her questioning.

“It seems you haven’t learned your place yet, Doctor”, he snapped, his tone icy and hostile. “This is a military base not a four-star resort.”

My blood pressure was already through the roof, and now it spiked even further. I clenched my fists, fighting the urge to slam my hand into the wall.

I stepped forward, my elbow connecting with Red’s ribs, a not-so-gentle reminder for her to shut the fuck up before she got us both buried.

She shot me a glare, but thank fuck didn’t say anything else.

“We’ll make it work, Captain,” I replied, quick and to the point.

We turned to leave, both wanting to get the fuck out of there, but before we could take a single step, the captain’s voice stopped us dead in our tracks.

I looked over at him and felt myself tense up as I held back the urge to knock him the fuck out so we could finally leave.

“Hold on a minute. I still haven’t received your medical report, Lieutenant. What the hell happened?”

For fuck’s sake, can’t a man catch a fucking break?

Of all the things that could go wrong, now I had to deal with paperwork bullshit.

I let out an internal groan, my mind racing to find a suitable excuse that would’t land us in hot water. But before I could open my mouth to respond, Red interjected with her own explanation.

“Sir,” she spoke up, “we had to leave the hospital in a hurry. But I’ll make sure to call the med camp and have them send it over immediately.”

Capt.’s stern gaze shifted to Red, his eyes drilling into her.

“You better. The government has been trying to cut our funding, and we don’t need any more reasons for those bureaucratic cunts to screw us over.”

That was too fucking close for comfort.

“Understood, sir,” she said, speaking with confidence and clarity, “I’ll get it sorted.”

She managed to say the right words to appease the captain’s ego and put a stop to his bitching.

He leaned forward, resting his wrinkled hands on the cluttered desk, old papers and coffee-stained mugs scattered around like a damn pigsty.

“Lieutenant,” he said, his voice gruff as sandpaper. “Tomorrow, I want a full report about that mission where your squad got wiped out. I want to know every single detail, every move you made, every decision you took.”

I paused, choosing my words carefully. No way in hell could I tell him what I really thought. He was too stubborn to hear it, and I couldn’t afford to lose his trust. My team deserved better, and I owed it to them to find out what the hell really happened out there.

“Yes, sir,” I replied instead, trying to keep the resentment out of my voice.

“And I want a damn good explanation,” he continued, leaning even closer. “I sent a special team to extract your ass from that godforsaken hole you were in, and I want to know what went wrong. You better not be holding out on me, boy.”

I swallowed hard, my Adam’s apple bobbing up and down like a buoy in the ocean. I knew what he wanted—a scapegoat, someone to blame for the failure.

“I’m still trying to piece together what happened.”

Captain Asshole just nodded, his face set in a hard line. “Good,” he grunted, leaning back in his chair, crossing his massive arms over his broad chest.

I was standing there, staring at his pudgy, sweat-drenched face, wondering what kind of sick, twisted game he was playing.

“Sir, may I ask about the extraction team? Did they take any hostages for information?”

He eyed me up and down, looking like he wanted to chew me up and spit me out. “There were no Taliban survivors, Rogue. No one to take hostage,” he said, smirking like he’d just won some great victory.

It was like going to a casino, putting all your money on black, and having the house just smile and hand it all back to you.

Oddly convenient.

“Understood, sir,” I nodded, knowing damn well that there was nothing to be said other than, ‘We fucked it up.’ “I’ll have the report ready by tomorrow.”

“You better,” he added, lighting a cigarette and sending a cloud of foul smoke wafting toward the poorly placed air vent. “And for the love of God, don’t make it sound like a scene from ‘Kill Bill’. Keep it PG-13, got it? I’ve got a sensitive stomach.”

With that, he leaned back in his chair and blew a cloud of smoke in my direction, flipping me off with one finger.

“Dismissed, soldier. Go until further notice, or until I change my mind and decide you’re expendable like the rest of your team.”

I felt like a fucking dog being told to go fetch.

I turned around and gestured for Red to follow me, skirting around groups of soldiers.

“Is your captain always this much of an asshole?” she asked, batting those pretty lashes at me.

I snorted, the sound coming out more like a bark than a proper laugh. “That was him in a good mood,” I responded, my voice softening as it wrapped around the words.

Her eyes widened, and she gripped my arm, her fingers biting into the skin. “You’re fucking with me, right?” she questioned, her voice rising an octave.

I leaned in close, my lips brushing against her ear. “Just wait until you see him when someone spills coffee on his favorite shirt.”

She looked at me for a moment, her gaze probing deeper than I was comfortable with. But then, she shook her head and let out a hollow sigh.

“Men in the army...” she mumbled, her voice trailing off as she shook her head.

“Welcome to the crew, love,” I drawled, giving her a sidelong glance as I led her down the corridor. “You know, I heard that in the army, they teach you to salute with your dick.”

Her face turned beet red, as she tried to hold back her laughter. “That’s disgusting.”

I grinned, full of shit and loving it. “Well, that’s just the kind of humor you can expect around here, sweetheart.”

The base was a typical military compound, with rows of brick buildings on either side of the narrow lane, all connected by endless rows of doors and small stairways.

As we walked, we bumped into one of the soldiers, Pyro, who flashed me a cocky smirk.

“Hey, Pyro, still got that sorry excuse for a mustache?” I jeered, earning a middle finger in response.

“It’s more than what your mom has to hold onto for night,” he shot back, brushing his thumb against his upper lip.

“At least she’d know what to grab on to unlike yours,” I remarked, my grin spreading wide.

Red cleared her throat, that polite way of telling me to quit my shit. I rolled my eyes, too tired and my ribs were hurting me too fucking much to argue with her about ordering me around.

With a salute, Pyro continued on his way, leaving us to navigate the final stretch to our destination. We approached a door labeled ‘Quarters’ and I pushed it open, gesturing grandly for Red to pass through.

“Ta-da! Your new home away from home,” I announced, flinging my arm out in a dramatic arc.

Finally, we arrived at my door, and I turned the handle, stepping inside. Being the fucking lieutenant had its perks, and that included having enough space for a small living area, a comfortable bed, and even a bathroom tucked away in a corner.

The place was bare, like a nun’s underwear—just a bed, desk, and the essentials. No decorations, no frills. I didn’t give a shit about making it cozy. Just needed a place to collapse and drown my demons in peace.

I strode in, not bothering to hold the door for Red, confident that she would follow and I made my way to the makeshift bar in the corner of the room, pouring myself a generous glass of whiskey.

I grabbed a cigarette from the pack on the desk, flicking the lighter open and igniting that sweet, sinful stick of nicotine and I took a long, satisfying drag, savoring the burn in my lungs before looking back at Red.

“What are you waiting for, Doc? A room tour?”

I took another sip of whiskey, the liquid burning a fiery path down my throat. The warmth spread through me, loosening up the knots that had been tying me down since morning.

Red simply shrugged and gave me a blank stare, as if I was an enigma she couldn’t begin to understand.

“Are you just gonna stare at me all night?” I asked, making it clear that I wasn’t in the mood for any of her silent, judgmental crap.

When she heard the sudden shift in my mood, her eyes suddenly red-blinked like she was being brought back to reality.

“Where’s the bathroom?” she asked, still completely expressionless.

“Down the hall, to your right,” pointed without looking. “You can’t miss it.”

My eyes followed her as she disappeared around the corner. The sound of running water soon reached my ears, and my mind was immediately flooded with thoughts.

Red.

Her presence.

Her calming effect on me, even though I had no reason to feel that way in the first place.

It made no sense, but it was undeniable.

I poured myself another glass of whiskey, thinking exactly what the hell I was doing. I knocked it back, trying to drown out the conflicting thoughts. It wasn’t like I enjoyed it. It wasn’t like I wanted to keep drinking. But I couldn’t stop; I was too far gone.

I was supposed to be on a mission, hunting down the snitch in our ranks, not babysitting some chick and getting sidetracked by some hot piece of ass.

But damn it, Red wasn’t as annoying as I thought she’d be, and that just pissed me off more. She had this way of getting under my skin, making me question shit I didn’t want to question.

Fuck, I hated when shit got complicated.

I crushed the cigarette between my fingers, the ashes falling like snowflakes to the cold ceramic floor. The whiskey was doing its job, and the silence felt peaceful... almost too peaceful.

I paced outside the bathroom, irritated as hell by how long she was taking. Just as I was about to barge in, I heard it—a muffled sob. The sound barely made it through the walls, but there was no mistaking it.

She was crying.

My heart fucking sank. I didn’t know what the hell to do. I wasn’t the comforting type; I dealt with shit by punching it, not by talking it through. But I couldn’t just stand there like a dickhead while she broke down in the shower.

I hesitated, my hand on the doorknob. Every instinct told me to walk away, but something else—some dumb, misplaced sense of responsibility—made me push the door open. The steam from the shower clouded the room, but I could see her silhouette through the frosted glass. She was standing in the shower, fully dressed, tears streaming down her face.

Goddamn it. I didn’t need this. I was a soldier. I was a warrior.

I tried my best to keep a straight face, but fuck, it was tearing me apart inside.

“Stop crying… it makes me want to hug you,” I muttered, trying my best to sound stern and uncaring, but my tone was breaking. “And we both know that’s not my thing.”

Her crying was breaking me.

Red didn’t answer me. She simply continued to cry as if my words didn’t even register, her tears blending with the water falling down her face.

And that was when I fucking lost it.

I stepped closer, my usual aversion to physical contact thrown out the window. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her out of the shower cabin, her trembling body pressed against mine. The water soaked us both, but I didn’t give a shit.

For the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel like a complete monster.

But fuck, I hated feeling this way.

Red looked like she was about to shatter into a million pieces. And somehow, in that moment, I understood.

She’d been carrying this shit around, keeping it buried until it ate her alive, and now it was all spilling out like a busted pipe. I knew the drill—feeling like you’re drowning in your own damn head.

I’d been there, drowning my shit in bottles of whiskey, trying to numb it all. The burn of the liquor on my tongue, the haze that clouded my mind, dulled the edges of my mind, quieting the chaos, at least for a while.

It’s what kept me from going batshit crazy. No rage. No pain. No goddamn feelings.

I wouldn’t feel anything at all.

That’s how I kept my demons on a leash, and it’s what stopped them from ripping me apart.

I didn’t ask Red any questions, didn’t probe for answers. I didn’t need her to explain shit to me, because I could see it in her eyes, in the way her shoulders slumped, in the way her tears flowed like a river. And I just fucking held her.

She buried her face in the crook of my neck, her soft sobs muffled against my skin. I almost fucking flinched at the touch, the warmth of her breath against my skin, but I stood there like a statue, suppressing the urge to back off. But the longer she held on, the harder it got to pretend I didn’t care.

Damn, she was just a girl in need of a hug, and I was just being an antisocial bastard.

“Shhh, it’s alright,” I whispered as I pulled her closer.

My fingers grazed her back soothingly, tracing patterns against her skin. I didn’t have the right words to offer, no poetic bullshit to ease her suffering.

I just held her like the world was ending, and we were the only two souls left.

And maybe, that would be enough for now.