21. Isabella

Another day passesand I'm completely exhausted. All Priest and me have done is spend time getting to know one another… and rolling around in his bed. The man has a sex drive like I've never met, and just when I was thinking it was because he's been celibate for so long, he read my mind and told me it was a ‘you thing.'

The man gave up his vow to God because of me, and I can tell by the sated look on his face and how calm he is that he's completely okay with that. As am I.

It's been a wild couple of days and we put Texas off until the following weekend. Not only have I opened up to him about my family and life within the Italian mafia, but he's also opened up about his life and some of the stuff that happened in prison. His past is colorful, but like a lot of things with Priest that I've come to realize; he's a good man affected a lot by circumstances completely out of his control.

He's protective.

He's generous.

He's funny. Smart. Sexy.

He has a hot name… Okay, not Percival, but Xavier Samuel is really cool. His last name – he told me later – is Grieves.

And the sex… Oh, my God. If we stay in this house any longer, we're going to screw ourselves to death.

He's always up. Always ready for me. And it gives me power knowing that I can do that to him. That he wants me that badly. It makes me forget about all the bad stuff and the war he told me is brewing. Like all wars, there will be bloodshed and loss. My heart aches and lurches at the idea that someone could hurt him. I can't live without him. He's not only been my lifeline and my friend; he's now my lover and a man that I can see myself with, making a life with. That in itself is a complete miracle.

Priest Xavier Samuel Grieves.

I lie in his arms on the couch. We were watching a movie, then we started fooling around and he took me from behind while we both laid on our sides. He's still in me as he plays with the ends of my hair.

"We'll go to the clubhouse tomorrow," he tells me out of nowhere.

I blink at the TV. "What for?"

"The club's goin' to raid the compound where your uncle lives. It's time, Bella. We have to end this before they attack us first."

I stay quiet. I always knew this was going to happen, and again, I wait for that feeling inside of me that tells me I should be sorry and at least feel a pang of regret about lives lost. But it just never comes. They're bad people. My father — according to Priest — molested kids. I shudder at the thought. He and my uncle trafficked children. How in the hell did I never hear about any of this? I know that women within the mob are shielded from having any knowledge of what's going on in the underworld, but I never truly thought they'd stoop that low. Guns, drugs and prostitution, yes, but trading innocent children? I shake my head. I want them all dead for the crimes they've committed and it only makes me want to try harder. Maybe my mission in life is to help people like me; people trapped or discarded. Unwanted. Abused. Whatever the reason. I know now that I want to help those in need. It's my calling. I don't know how I'm going to do it, but I'm determined to make it my mission in life. And with Priest's and Father Dan's help, I might even be able to make a difference.

"Are you okay?" He kisses my neck when I don't reply.

"Yes," I whisper. "I don't even have the capacity to feel remorse for any of them. What does that make me?"

"Why should you?" he counters. "Those men were the pits of society. What they"ve done and continue to do should only remind you that they all deserve to be put in the ground, not just run out of town."

I completely agree with him. They deserve no sympathy for anything they've done.

They can all rot for all I care.

"They don't deserve to breathe air. They deserve to suffer in Hell."

He pulls me closer, my back pressed against this warm chest as his dick remains inside me, where he belongs. Even though possession in my family has been a sore spot for me — I never wanted to be a trophy wife for Leo, for example. It feels completely different with Priest. His possession I can get on board with. He makes me feel things that I've never felt before. A light turned on inside me when our paths crossed and I'll never regret any of it for the rest of my life.

"And so they shall." He pulls out, reaching down to pull the condom off.

"Put it back in," I whisper, half turning so I can see his glorious face.

His lips twitch. "You want to fall asleep with me inside you, baby?"

I nod. "Yes. I want you inside me, as close as we can get."

He kisses my lips, his tongue meeting mine as he reaches between us and slides back inside me to the hilt. He stills. "You like me takin' what's mine, don't you, Bella?"

"It is yours," I tell him. "My body is yours to do what you want with."

His lips brush mine. "I like the sound of that."

I smile, nestling back into the crook of his arm as we lie together. It feels so good to be owned like this. To belong to someone who belongs to me just as much.

"How do I make you feel?" I have the courage to ask after a few moments.

He strokes my hair. "Like I'm the luckiest man alive."

"Are we just in this sex-crazed love bubble? What if that's all it is."

His chest rumbles against my back as he laughs. "I quite like this sex-crazed love bubble. But there's more to it than that, and you know it."

"You catching feelings?" I can't help the sputter of laughter that breaks free from my chest.

He bumps me with his hips. "Very funny."

"I couldn't help it."

He snuggles into the back of my neck. "I like it when you laugh."

"I'll try to do more of that, just for you."

"Good." His soft breath on my neck makes me feel so comfortable and warm. With the blanket pulled up over us I know we're going to fall asleep like this, and I can't get enough of it.

"I don't want anything to happen to you," I whisper.

His thumb moves over my knuckles, his voice weary. "It won't. I'll be okay."

"But you're goin there? To my uncle's place?"

"The less you know about the details, the better, but yes, I'll be there. I have to go where my club needs me."

"What if something happens to you?"

"It won't." He sounds so sure that I want to believe him. Even if I know that's not how these things work. There are always casualties. "In the morning, I need to know everything you know about your uncle's place, got me?"

"I didn't go there often," I say. "But I'll tell you what I do know, and where guards are located."

"Good girl."

I take a long inhale of breath, feeling his breathing lull. I've never felt so wanted and needed in my life. "I love you." My words are barely a whisper. I close my eyes, ready for unconsciousness to take me.

"I love you, too," Priest mutters, his arms around me protectively. "I'll never let you go."

In the morning, Priest brings my uncle's house up on his laptop and on an aerial view, I show him all of the checkpoints that I know of, and let him know that he also has a secret underground tunnel. Somewhere he"ll retreat to, like a panic room if they set the alarms off or get seen before they can attack. There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that not only bloodshed, but an entire all-out war, is going to erupt, and panic sets in far worse than it did last night.

In the light of day this is really starting to feel real. Finally, the Caruso family are going to get what's coming to them, and after all the destruction and pain they have caused over the years, they deserve every ounce of punishment inflicted on them.

If only my father and uncle could see me now.

"They have a warehouse," I tell Priest. I give him the address. "I don't want to think about what they do there, but I assume none of its very good."

He cups my chin. "Good girl. I didn't know about that."

I feel good I can at least give him little bits of information. Even if they are small, it could help. "When will you be back?"

He presses a kiss to my lips. "I'm not gone yet."

I roll my eyes. "No, but you will be."

"It could be a day or so. Whenever Cash gives the order. We have to wait for the right time."

I don't like that idea one bit. "I wish this didn't have to happen."

He brushes the hair back off my face, tucking it behind my ears. "I know that, little one. But sometimes this is part of being with the MC. We have to clear out the trash from time to time. After we're done, we'll go to Texas."

I smile at his words. "I get it. I just worry about you."

"You don't have to worry. I've survived prison. I've also survived a rough childhood and being shot, as well as stabbed, and I'm still standing." He places my hand over his heart as I try not to well up. "This heart beats for you, sweet Bella. Never forget that."

He's so warm. Even through his t-shirt, I can feel the heat radiating off him.

"Please tell me you'll be safe, that you won't take any unnecessary risks."

"I promise." His answer is a little too quick, and I know that the best I can wish for is that he makes it home safely. He and his club brothers. "So, I think we're ready to go, yeah?"

Priest lent me his duffle bag so I could pack some clothes and toiletries. Since we don't know how long we're going to be, I'd rather pack more than I need than not enough. Lord knows I've learned to live without life's luxuries, but I'd rather not have to if I can avoid it.

I nod. "I'm ready."

We've been so loved up these past few days it's been sickening. We haven't been able to keep our hands off one another. When I glanced in the mirror after my shower, I couldn't believe how different I looked. For the first time in my life, I'm happy.

The dark circles under my eyes had gone. I've put on a little weight. I don't look so startled like I did before.

Maybe it is early days and I'm naive. I know that I've not had much — or any — experience when it comes to men, but I also know how I feel. And I've never felt this way about anyone. Priest and me had a connection from the very start. My eyes begin to water when I think about him and how sweet he was when we first met. How he took me in, was patient and gentle with me and I'll never forget that. No matter what happens.

Priest gathers up his cats into the carriers, since we're going to be gone for days, they obviously can't stay here alone. I'm taking his room at the clubhouse. I seriously don't want to think about what he used to do in that room, or how I'll fit in with some of the other people staying there, but I remind myself I have Stella and Manny to fall back on. I know they won't leave me high and dry.

We load the cats and the bags into Priest's truck and I climb into the passenger seat.

When he starts the engine, I close my eyes, wishing all of this to be over. We've postponed going to Texas for obvious reasons, but when all of this is done and I know it's safe, I'm going to that locked box to find out what's inside. It's been gnawing at me ever since my grandmother told me.

I fiddle with the ring on my finger, another nervous habit, and when we're pulling out onto the street, Priest reaches over and puts his hand on my knee, giving it a squeeze.

"Don't be worried."

I chew my lip. "I'm not worried."

I feel him looking at me. "Bella. I've done a lot of dangerous things before."

I turn to meet his gaze as he shifts his eyes back to the road. "Yes, but this is the mob, Priest. These are bad men, they won't take any prisoners."

"And you think my club are good men?"

"Mostly," I say, earning another glance. "Otherwise you wouldn't be involved with them."

He squeezes my knee again. "Wise ass."

I smile softly. "I just… I saw what happened that night."

"And you would've also seen that my club and the Irish took most of those men out. So you've nothing to be concerned about where manpower is concerned."

I wish it was that easy to believe him, but I've spent my life thus far worrying about every detail of my life. Living in the shadows and never speaking up, it was a way of life. Now I have a voice, I want to use it. I want to tell Priest not to go, that I'm scared he won't come back. That selfishly I'll be all alone once more. That I love him so much and if anything happened to him, I'd want to die too.

I nod, crossing my arms over my chest. "I know."

He motions for my hand, and I reach down to link my fingers through his. He brings my knuckles to his lips and kisses them. "Part of bein' with me means that I'm sometimes gonna do dangerous things," he says. "But that's the life I chose. A life that was far better than goin' back to prison or livin' on the streets doin' bad shit. This is what I signed up for, baby girl. And you'll be safe at the clubhouse, that means I won't have to worry about you."

"We've only just found one another," I whisper. "I need more time with you."

He kisses my knuckles again. "And we will. When this is over, we'll have all the ti?—"

The bang sounds like it's from far away, but then the truck starts spinning and Priest loses control of the wheel. His arm darts out to press against my chest as we spin out of control and the front windscreen cracks. It takes me a second to realize that we've been hit from the side, and now… now there's gunfire…

"Fuck!" The car rolls and I scream as I'm jerked and tossed around, my seatbelt holding me down as I cry out in pain as I hear my shoulder snap.

Then we stop. I blink. Am I dead?

I turn my head and see Priest is faced to once side… away from me… Is he… Is he dead?

The cats — by some miracle — meow out of control as I try to twist my neck to check on them, but I wince as the window smashes next to me and then I'm being hauled out of the truck.

"Priest!" I yell, but he doesn't move.

Oh, my God.

They killed him.

They killed the only man I've ever loved.

I turn as two huge men with balaclavas covering their faces grab me and shove me into a dark, unmarked van. I don't even have the strength to scream, or shout.

I'm frozen.

My life just ended.

My life just ceased to exist because the only man that ever cared for me is gone.

I close my eyes, unable to take any more. The pain in my shoulder is a distant memory as I start to feel my head swaying. Oh, no. I can't black out. I can't. I need to be strong for… For whom?

I scramble back onto the seat as the men climb in alongside me and the van takes off at high speed. I slump against the window as I try to focus my eyes.

Then I hear a voice that chills me to my very core. "Hello, Isabella," Leo says. His words sound slurry as I try to focus, everything around me is blurring rapidly as I struggle to keep my eyes open. "I'm so glad we get to meet again."