Chapter Seventeen

Ava

Don't ask me what possessed me to do what I'm doing right now, but I'm not fighting it. Not stopping it. Not asking.

Taking.

Stepping so far out of my comfort zone and just taking exactly what I want.

Gavin.

I want Gavin.

Despite the fact I'm his daughter's teacher. Despite the fact I have rules that have always kept me moving forward and between the lines my entire life. Despite the fact I've tried to fight my attraction to him.

I'm tired of pretending.

I'm tired of taking it slow.

I. Want. Gavin.

The kiss is powerful. It's consuming, intoxicating, and everything a kiss should be. My hands dive into his hair, and as his tongue delves into my mouth, caressing my own, all I can do is hang on and enjoy the ride. Gavin can kiss. My word, he's potent and pure sex. He makes me want to do things I've never done— feel things I've never felt. And the wild part is, I'm not scared.

I mean, I am, but not of him.

Never of him.

His large, rough hands gently slide under my sweatshirt and caress my back. But they don't stop there, I'm very much aware of the fact they're moving to my side. The right one keeps going around to my front. My grip on his brown hair tightens as his fingers dance across the bottom of my simple cotton bra. Then, those long fingers swipe across my hard nipple, and I almost detonate like a bomb.

My blood is swooshing through my veins, reckless and uninhibited. I've never felt as alive, as desired as I do right now. His erection is pressed firmly against my core, hard and ready, and my hips automatically rock against it, needing more.

"Gavin," I groan his name, a plea dripping from my lips.

"Take what you need, Ava," he murmurs, his words so heady and full of his own desire.

My body moves, chasing the need for release. He slides his tongue against mine, in and out of my mouth, mimicking sex to the same rhythm as his hips. Pleasure floods my entire body, my mind does nothing but focus on the way he makes me feel. Through my bra, he rolls my nipple between his index finger and thumb, and the wave of euphoria is almost too much. Especially when he grinds his hard length through my jeans against my clit.

Squeezing my eyes closed, I try to fight the onslaught of rapture, but it's no use. Not when he seems hell-bent on making me come right here, right now.

"Let go, beautiful," he murmurs against my lips.

The fierceness, the determination in his voice, paired with the expert manipulation of his hands, mouth, and groin, is enough to send me over the edge. I'm flying, riding the waves of my release, crying out his name as my hips rock against him. I can feel him tense beneath me, his hands pausing, fingers flexing.

Leaning forward, I rest my face against his headrest as the embarrassment starts to replace the bliss. Did that really just happen ? Sitting in my driveway, in his truck?

"Ava," he murmurs, turning his head into my neck. "Look at me."

After a few breaths, I answer, "I'm not sure I want to."

He kisses my face and shifts me until we're looking at each other again. "Why are you embarrassed?" he asks, gently reaching up and caressing my cheek.

"Umm, well, that was… not something I've done before. Ever." I wait for the laughter, the smile, something. I'm a little on the inexperienced side when it comes to sex. I've had sex before, just not a lot.

He doesn't react the way I expect though. There's confusion in his eyes, but the hazel orbs are void of humor. "And that makes you embarrassed?"

I shrug, knowing this discussion has been coming, but feeling uncomfortable having it nonetheless. "Yeah. I mean, I've had sex and orgasms. Most of them done by my own hands," I state, watching as his eyes suddenly darken with desire and his cock starts to get hard once more.

"We're going to come back to that, because I definitely want to watch," he says before clearing his throat. "And as far as the other, you have no reason to be ashamed. If something felt good and we were both into it, what's to be embarrassed about? I know I'm not."

I wiggle, which causes his half-mast erection to jolt in excitement. "Sorry."

His grin is wolfish. "I've had that problem since last summer when I saw you at the bar. You were celebrating Hallie's birthday and wearing that amazing red dress."

My mouth might fall open just a bit. "You remember what I was wearing?"

"Of course I do. I couldn't take my eyes off you. And I hope this confession doesn't make me sound too much like a horny dog, but I jacked off for a week straight with those images of you in that dress."

My face flames redder than my hair and my hand covers my mouth. "Really?"

"Totally." Leaning forward and pressing his mouth against my ear, he whispers, "Sexiest. Fucking. Dress. Ever."

My heart is pounding in my chest as I stare into his heated eyes. "I wore it on New Year's Eve," I blurt out like the dork I am.

"I figured. It took me a bit to figure out it was the red dress with a black sweater over the top, but rest assured, the result was the same. Jacked off before I could fall asleep." His confession is heady and does wonders for my confidence level and calming my nerves. "You are the sexiest, most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and the fact you haven't dry humped anyone before actually makes me happy, because not only was it a first I get to share with you, but I don't have to kill some poor asshole because, apparently, I'm a jealous fucker when it comes to you. I really like you."

A smile cracks across my lips as I lean forward and press them to his. "I really like you too."

Again, he strokes his finger over my bottom lip. "Good. And I don't want you to ever feel embarrassed when we're together. Every moment I spend with you is perfect, because it's just you and me. We're getting to know each other and doing things that make us both feel good. There's nothing wrong with either, especially when I get to watch you come undone the way you just did."

Feeling myself relax, I hug him as best as I can, considering our positions in the truck. "You're too good to be true," I whisper.

"No, I'm not. I'm just a man doing his best to learn from past mistakes and do right by the people around me, especially those I care about."

You couldn't pry my smile off my face with a putty knife. Glancing down, I notice the wet spot on the front of his jeans. "Ummm…"

He snorts, looking down after noticing where my eyes are. "Occupational hazard?" he jokes.

Knowing how messy I feel right now in my own pants, I can't imagine what he's dealing with. "Do you want to come inside? You know, get cleaned up?"

His smile is the sweetest, most gentle one I've ever seen. "Yes," he says, placing a chaste kiss on my lips. "Which is why I'm not."

There must be confusion written all over my face.

"We're not quite there yet, despite what might have just happened, but we're close. When I take you to bed, it's all night, Ava. You and me with nothing between us, literally and figuratively."

"I want that too," I murmur.

"And we'll get there. I'm not rushing this. I'm not rushing you. "

My lips find his once more in a leisurely kiss. I realize I could kiss this man all day, every day, and never tire. He has the most amazing mouth and evokes feelings I've never experienced.

When we finally pull apart, it's with a sigh. "I'll walk you up."

Again, I glance down at the wet spot between us. "I'm sure that wouldn't be very comfortable. I can manage."

He opens his mouth, most likely to argue, but I silence him with a finger to his lips. "I'll be fine."

Seeming annoyed, he insists, "Text me when you get inside, and be sure to lock the door."

"I will," I agree, reaching for my purse.

Carefully, I climb off his lap and out the door, only to be stopped the moment my feet hit the pavement. "Thank you for an amazing day. And just so you know, this was definitely a date date."

Nodding, I concur. "It was definitely a date date."

Pressing one final kiss to his lips, I make my way to my house, smiling the entire way.

By the time I'm inside, my panties are soaked from my orgasm, but it doesn't stop me from spinning around in a circle in elation. I quickly fire off a text message, realizing Gavin is still sitting in my driveway, most likely waiting for the sign to leave. His reply is instant and makes me smile once more.

Gavin: Good night, beautiful. Talk to you very soon.

Best date date ever.

"I have a question for you," Ellie says the moment she reaches my table.

"Well, good evening to you too," I tease as she delivers a glass of water.

"Do you want something besides water?" she asks.

"This is perfect, thank you."

"Can I put in an order?" she offers.

I turn and look at the specials board, happy to see Saul's bacon-wrapped meatloaf listed. "You still have some left?"

She nods. "He's been making double batches lately, so we've actually been making it through the day."

"Green beans?" I nod as she scurries off to the kitchen to put in my order. When that's done, she takes off her apron and drops down onto the bench across from me. "What a day," she says, leaning her head back against the wall behind the booth.

"We can do this another time," I suggest.

Ellie waves off my comment. "It's okay. TD should be here shortly, and then we'll head home. He had team lift and a leadership council meeting for the team," she informs me, referring to the football team her husband coaches.

"If you're sure," I start, hating to keep her here if she's ready to go home and put her feet up.

"I'm sure. The reason I asked you to stop by is to see if you were interested in helping me with a baby shower. Well, two baby showers, actually," she says, her eyes bright with excitement.

"I'd love to help," I insist without needing to hear a single detail.

"Really? Oh, thank you so much. Both Blair and Hallie said they'd help throw the other's shower, but that just seems silly. I mean, I know they're best friends and sisters-in-law, but they shouldn't have to lift a finger to do anything, especially if we combine their showers into one."

"Oh, I like that," I tell her, taking a drink of water.

"At first, I wasn't sure about that. They both deserve their own day to be showered, but once Hallie suggested it, the idea didn't seem so bad."

"Those two have been best friends forever," I agree, knowing they'd love to have their showers together. Their babies—who will be cousins—are due a month apart.

"Agreed. Patience offered to host the showers at their house, but I was afraid that might be too uncomfortable for Blair's mom."

Blair's mom and dad split up the summer between our junior and senior year of high school, thanks to her dad's affair with his much younger nurse, Patience. Once Frank and Donna's divorce was finalized, Donna and Blair moved to Merrillville, Indiana, while Frank and Patience got married one week after the divorce. They also had a daughter, Aggie, who is eight now, and even though it's taken a long time to get to a place of common ground, that wasn't always the case, so I can understand Ellie's worry where the exes are concerned.

"We could rent the community center," I suggest.

"I think that might be the easiest," she agrees. "I called this morning to see what dates are available next month. February twenty-sixth is a Sunday."

My brain starts to do the math. "Yikes. That doesn't give us a lot of time." About six weeks to be exact.

"No, but we can totally do it. We just need to confirm the venue and date. Once we have that, we can finalize invites and get those in the mail. Blair and Hallie are both working on a registry, and what I was hoping you'd help me with is the decorations. You're so crafty and creative, I think you could come up with some cute stuff."

I nod. "I'd love to," I tell her enthusiastically. "Blair is having a girl, so that's easy. The tricky one is going to be Hallie, since they want to be surprised."

"Hallie and Logan are doing a forest animals theme in very neutral, light colors, and Gabe and Blair are doing everything pink and girly," she confirms.

"Well, I'll figure something out," I state, ready to go home and start planning. "I can help with invites and whatever else you need."

"Thank you. All the moms have volunteered to help too, so we'll have plenty of hands." There are several, including Donna, Blair's mom, Patience, her stepmom, Debbie, Hallie and Gabe's mom, and Patty, Logan's mom. Not to mention the grandmas.

"Well, you tell me what you want me to do, and I'll do it."

The bell chimes, signaling a server to the kitchen for a completed order. When Ellie glances over there and sees the to-go bag, she jumps up and goes to retrieve it. "Here's your food."

"Thank you," I reply, pulling out a twenty from my wallet. "Keep the change."

She gives me a grateful smile. "Thanks. I'll call and book the community center tomorrow and text you."

"Are we sure Hallie and Blair are available that day?"

"They both told me they'd make whatever date we picked work. Gabe may have to be on-call for the clinic, but he promised to cover for Blair so she had nothing on her calendar," she adds.

"All right, well, let's get to planning a double baby shower."

She grins as I stand up and give her a hug. When she pulls back, I whisper, "How are you doing?"

It's no secret Ellie and TD have been trying to have a baby since they got married last summer, and unfortunately, it hasn't happened for them yet. I know she's anxious and worried, since we're all in our mid to late thirties now. Pregnancies are considered high risk, and statistically speaking, the more time that passes without getting pregnant, the harder it becomes.

She shrugs. "I'm okay. TD keeps telling me to stop stressing, but that's easier said than done. I just…what if I can't give him a baby? We wasted so many years being just friends, and now that we're married, what if I can't get pregnant? He wants to be a dad so bad."

Food forgotten, I step forward and wrap my arms around her. "He is a dad. He's been Brody's dad for most of that boy's life. It doesn't matter what name is on the birth certificate or whose blood runs through his veins. TD is the only dad who matters to Brody."

"I know," Ellie whispers, her eyes filling with tears.

"And if and when you're able to have a baby, he will be the best dad ever, I know it. I also know he would happily spend the rest of his life just the three of you. That man only needs you to be happy, Ellie. You and Brody."

Tears start to fall down her cheeks. "I know. He tells me that all the time."

"Believe him," I insist. The bell over the door chimes, but neither of us pays any attention. "He loves you so much. Always has."

"Ellie."

We turn to see TD making his way toward us. He's zeroed in on the fact she's crying, and the look on his face is part pain, part concern, as if the mere sight of her with tears streaming down her cheeks could bring him to his knees.

He's such a good guy.

"Hi," she whispers, smiling as he approaches and takes her in his arms.

"What's wrong?" he asks, looking her over after he kisses her lips.

"I'm just being silly. Girly emotions and all that stuff," she says, trying to wave off his concern.

As realization sets in, he pulls her against his broad chest and holds her close. "You ready to go home, love?"

"Yes. Let me grab my bag from the office," Ellie replies, swiping at the remaining moisture on her cheeks and giving him a small grin. "Be right back."

As soon as she leaves the table to retrieve her bag, TD turns to me with pain in his eyes. "This is killing her."

"I know," I reply quietly, not really knowing what else to say.

"We'll keep trying. We'll try until we're eighty if we have to."

I don't have the heart to tell him that probably won't work. Once menopause sets in, their chances of having a baby the old-fashioned way will come to an end. "Is this double baby shower going to be too much for her?"

TD sighs. "I asked her if it was necessary, and she said it was. She insisted if the shoes were on the other foot, both Blair and Hallie would demand on hosting her shower."

I nod, knowing he's right. "I'll do whatever I can to help. If you think it's too much for her, let me know and I'll take over."

"Thanks, Ava," he says, the relief evident in his voice, as Ellie appears from the back.

"Ready to go," she says, slipping under his extended arm. "I'll text you after I get the confirmation."

"Sounds good."

I watch as they leave together, feeling their overwhelming love for one another, as well as the added worries of not conceiving yet. I know he wants to help and protect her, which is one of the things I admire most about TD. He's such a great man, father to Brody, and husband.

He reminds me a bit of Gavin.

Speaking of the amazing man, I grab my to-go order of Sal's meatloaf and head for home. We haven't spoken since he dropped me off last night, but he's all I've thought about. Throughout the day, while I'm teaching my class, he randomly pops into my head at the most inopportune times. I can't help but wonder if he's thinking about me as often as I've been thinking about him. Day and night, Gavin Pierson has taken over my every thought, and I just don't know what to do about it.

I'm afraid, at this point, there's nothing I can do.

He's in my brain—and on my heart—like a tattoo.

And what's surprising is the fact I like him there.