26. Creed

CHAPTER 26

CREED

I didn't know what to say. Didn't know if there was anything I could say that wouldn't make things worse. So I just stayed there, my head resting on Avery's shoulder. I watched the snowflakes melt into tiny droplets that clung to his lashes. For once, the silence didn't feel like something that needed to be filled. It just was .

He glanced over at me, his eyes shadowed. "How did you know I'd be here?"

My throat felt dry, the words sticking in my mouth, but I forced them out. "Becca told me. She said this is where you come sometimes when... when things get too much." I swallowed, the words scraping against my raw throat. "She told me I needed to find you."

Avery nodded. He turned his gaze back to the headstone.

"I'm sorry," I blurted out. "I'm sorry for... for being such a piece of shit."

I braced myself for him to argue, to throw my apology back in my face, or to insist that I wasn't as bad as I thought I was. Something . But he didn't. He just kept staring at that damn headstone, like it held all the answers he'd been looking for.

"My father," he began after a long stretch of silence, his voice rough with a kind of weariness I recognized all too well. "I spent my whole life trying to be what he wanted. Trying to prove to him that I could be... enough. But it was never enough for him. No matter what I did, there was always something he could find fault with."

I shifted closer to him.

"He made me feel small. Weak," Avery continued. "And when he died, I thought I'd feel relief. Like maybe I could finally breathe without his voice in my head. But I just felt... guilty. Guilty for hating him, and guilty for missing him. For wishing he'd been a different man, one who could have actually loved me."

The raw honesty in his voice sent a shiver through me, but it wasn't from the cold. I stared at his profile, the lines of his face softened by the snow, and felt the tightness in my chest ease just a little, like his pain made mine a little less suffocating. Like maybe we were just two guys who'd spent too long trying to live up to someone else's expectations.

"I know what that's like," I murmured, my voice barely more than a rasp against the night air. "I hate that my father's voice is still in my head. Hate that I keep letting him in, letting him mess with my life even after I thought I'd buried all of that. And I—" My breath hitched, my lungs burning with the cold. "I don't want to be that man, Avery. The one who keeps letting the past screw up every good thing that comes his way."

Avery turned to me then, his eyes searching mine, and I saw something shift in his expression. What was it? I wasn't sure, but it was softer. "You're not him. You're not him, Creed. And you're not a piece of shit. You're—" He broke off, his jaw working like he was trying to find the right words, then he let out a breath that clouded the air between us. "You're exactly what I deserve. More than that."

The words hit me hard, something breaking loose inside my chest, something I hadn't even realized I'd been holding onto. I closed my eyes for a second, feeling the sting of tears that I refused to let fall. When I opened them again, Avery was closer, so close.

Without thinking, I leaned forward, my lips brushing his, soft and tentative, like I was afraid he'd disappear if I pushed too hard. But he didn't pull away. Instead, he leaned into me, his mouth warm against mine, and in that moment, the cold didn't matter. Nothing mattered except the way he fit against me, the way his fingers curled into the front of my coat, holding on like he was afraid I'd slip away too.

When we finally broke apart, the space between us felt different—less empty, more charged with everything we hadn't said. He pressed his forehead against mine, his breath mingling with mine, the warmth of it fogging the air between us. Neither of us said the words we were both thinking, but I felt them there, unspoken, humming beneath my skin.

"I'm here," I whispered, my voice rough with the weight of everything I couldn't put into words. "I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere."

Avery's fingers tightened in my coat, and he nodded, a small, almost broken motion. "Yeah," he breathed, the word barely more than a sigh. "Yeah, I know."

We stayed like that, wrapped in each other. I held onto him, as if he was the only solid thing left in the world. But then the cold became too much to ignore and we had to head inside.

Avery's hand lingered on the small of my back as the bedroom door clicked shut behind us. I glanced over at him, catching the soft, contented curve of his lips. There was a softness in his expression that I loved seeing, especially after what happened the night before.

Neither of us said a word as our hands moved to the edges of each other's jackets, peeling away the cold, wet layers that clung to our skin. My fingers fumbled a little as I unbuttoned his shirt, still not believing that this moment was real. But Avery's hands were steady, his touch confident as he slipped my shirt over my head.

By the time we were down to our underwear, the chill from outside had settled into our bones, and Avery's mouth twitched into a knowing, almost mischievous smile. He took my hand, tugging me toward the bathroom, and I followed without hesitation. Steam filled the air as he turned on the shower, the water heating up fast, and he pulled me under the spray, the hot water cascading over us both.

I let out a shaky breath as the heat seeped into my skin, chasing away the last remnants of the cold. Avery's hands followed the path of the water, sliding over my shoulders, my chest, each touch unhurried and gentle, like he was learning me, piece by piece. I mirrored him, letting my hands roam over his slick skin, tracing the lines of muscle that flexed beneath my palms. There was something intoxicating about the feel of him, solid and warm.

Neither of us spoke, but there was a quiet understanding in the way we touched each other, a kind of reverence that made my chest ache. He tilted my head back, his fingers sliding through my wet hair, and kissed me, slow and deep, the water streaming between our bodies. My pulse quickened, and I felt that familiar twist of fear in my gut, but it wasn't enough to make me pull away. Not this time.

Avery's lips brushed against my ear as he pressed closer, his voice low and rough. "You're the most beautiful man I've ever met, Creed. You know that?"

I let out a shaky laugh, the sound barely more than a breath. "You're full of shit."

His teeth grazed my jaw, sending a shiver down my spine. "You have no idea what you do to me." His hands tightened on my waist, pulling me flush against him, letting me feel just how much he meant those words. The heat of his body, the hardness of his dick pressed against my thigh—it sent a jolt of electricity straight through me, setting my skin on fire.

My breaths came faster, my hands gripping his shoulders for balance as the water continued to cascade over us, turning everything hot and slick. I wanted him, wanted this, more than I'd ever wanted anything before, and that terrified me. But the fear melted away when I met his eyes, saw the hunger and the tenderness that burned there, all for me.

"I don't want you to do anything you're not ready for," he murmured, his thumb tracing circles against my hip. "You say the word, and we'll stop."

A lump rose in my throat, and I had to swallow hard before I could speak. "I— I want this. I want you ." My voice cracked, but I pushed through, letting the truth spill out. "I'm scared, but not of you."

Something softened in his expression, his hand cradling my face, his thumb brushing over my cheekbone in a gesture so gentle it almost broke me. He kissed me again, and this time, it was like a promise, a reassurance that he'd be there, that he wouldn't let me fall.

We stepped out of the shower and moved to the bed, still dripping wet, leaving a trail of water across the carpet, but I didn't care. All I could focus on was the heat in Avery's gaze as he pushed me gently back onto the mattress, his hands roaming over my skin like he was mapping out every inch of me. He kissed a line down my throat, along my collarbone, each touch sending sparks dancing across my skin, until I was arching up into him, desperate for more.

I'd never felt anything like this before—this slow burn that built between us, the way every touch seemed to light me up from the inside. My hands clenched in the sheets as he worked his way lower, his mouth tracing a path down my chest, his breath hot. He whispered things against my skin, words that made my heart trip over itself, made me believe I was worth wanting.

"You're gorgeous like this," he breathed, his voice low and husky, vibrating against my stomach. "All spread out for me, hungry for me."

Heat crawled up my neck, and I forced myself to meet his gaze, even though the intensity there made me want to look away. But he held my stare, his eyes dark with desire, and there was something almost tender in the way he smiled at me, like I was some rare, precious thing he couldn't believe he'd found.

The world outside slipped away as he took his time, exploring every inch of me with hands that knew when to be firm and when to be gentle. His touch sent shivers racing across my skin, making me feel exposed but safe. He trailed kisses down my neck, pausing to whisper against my ear, "You okay, Creed?" His voice was tender, but there was a rough edge to it—possessive, like he wanted me to know that this was real, that he wouldn't rush.

"Yeah, I'm good," I whispered back, my voice cracking on the last word. Avery's breath hitched in response, and I could feel the tension between us, the way it coiled tighter with each careful caress.

He reached in the top drawer of the bedside table for the lube, warming it between his hands before slipping one finger inside my hole, working me open with slow, careful movements. The sensation was strange and intense, but he kept me grounded with kisses, pressing his lips to my temple, my jawline, anywhere he could reach. "I've got you, I promise," he murmured, his voice a soothing rumble. I believed him—wanted to believe him.

I arched into his touch, needing more but not knowing how to ask for it. Avery chuckled softly, reading the unspoken plea in my movements. "You're doing so well, Creed," he said, adding another finger and stretching me with gentle insistence. "Let me hear you."

A moan slipped past my lips, raw and unguarded. His free hand cupped my face, his thumb brushing across my cheek as he watched my reactions closely, waiting for any sign that I needed him to slow down. "You're safe with me. You know that, right? I've got you."

I nodded, my body trembling with need and nerves, even while he added the third finger. "Yeah, I do," I breathed, leaning into his touch. The way he looked at me—like I was something precious, something he couldn't bear to hurt—made my chest tighten in a way I wasn't sure how to unpack.

When he finally moved over me, his body covering mine, he paused, pressing our foreheads together. "Tell me if it's too much," he whispered. I met his gaze, reveling in the warmth of his body against mine, and nodded.

And then he pushed inside, slow and careful, giving me time to adjust. The stretch burned at first, but he stayed close, pressing kisses to my temple, my lips, breathing my name as if it were a sacred vow. I clung to him, the sensations overwhelming, but the sound of his voice, the weight of his body over mine, kept me grounded.

"You're doing so good, Creed," he murmured, his voice rough with restraint. "You feel so damn good, baby."

I clung to him, my fingers digging into his shoulders as the pleasure and pain twisted together, melting into something that made my breath hitch, made my whole body tighten around him. He moved slowly at first, his hips rolling in a rhythm that sent waves of heat crashing through me, each thrust pushing me closer to the edge.

And then something broke inside me, something I didn't even know I'd been holding back, and I let myself go. I let the fear and the shame fall away, let myself feel everything—every touch, every breath, every broken sound that fell from my lips. Avery kissed me through it, his mouth hot and urgent against mine, swallowing my gasps, my moans, until there was nothing left but the two of us, tangled together in the heat and the darkness.

When I finally came apart, it was like a dam breaking, my whole body shuddering as the pleasure washed over me, leaving me gasping and raw. Avery followed, his arms wrapping around me, holding me tight as he buried his face in my neck, his breath hot against my skin.

For a long time, we just lay there, our bodies tangled together, our breaths mingling in the moonlight. The room was quiet, the only sound the steady thud of our heartbeats, and I felt a strange, aching warmth bloom in my chest. For the first time in as long as I could remember, I felt whole, like all the broken pieces inside me had finally settled into place.

I didn't say it—couldn't bring myself to speak the words that hung heavy in the air between us. But as Avery's fingers traced lazy circles against my back, as he pressed a kiss to my temple and whispered my name like a promise, I thought maybe he understood. And maybe that was enough.