44 - Joanna

44

Joanna

I was not experienced when it came to marijuana.

I tried it once at a party in college. It ended up not doing much for me; I think I coughed so much none of it actually got into my system. After that, I stuck to alcohol.

But what I said was true: I did want to relax after finding out there was a hiring freeze at DefTec. And if there was ever a place to try it for the first time, it was Jamaica.

It was also nice to hang out with the guys for once. I was sick of Marisa, Danicka, and the other girls.

"You sure you want to do this?" Theo whispered to me after handing a joint to Bradyn.

"It's only weed," I said. "It's been legal in Illinois for years. It's not a big deal."

"Just making sure you don't feel pressured to do something you don't want to."

His concern was touching, but I wasn't in the mood for it tonight. I turned toward Bradyn, who was lighting the joint on the balcony.

Once he got it lit, I watched what the others did. Wyatt took a puff for two seconds, then passed it on. Peter did the same thing. When it was my turn, I pinched the joint between my fingers and took a breath.

One Mississippi, two Mississi—

I abruptly started coughing, just like when I had tried it in college. The smoke tickled my lungs!

"Easy, there," Austin said, putting a comforting hand on my back. "You're all right. Just relax."

"I'm a newbie!" I admitted while passing the weed to Austin. "I'm bad at this."

"Being bad at something is the first step to getting good at something," Theo said. He took a long puff, then handed it to me. "Try again."

The second time was easier, although it still tickle-burned my lungs. When it was over, I stared out at the view from Theo's balcony. We could see half the resort from here, with the ocean beyond. The sound of the wind, and the waves, was calming.

Once the joint was used up, we went back inside. Theo played some relaxing music on his phone. Bradyn and Wyatt sat on the bed, while I took the couch with Theo and Peter. Austin sat in the chair across from the couch.

It was a strange sensation, being high. My thoughts kept falling apart before they could coalesce, like mist dissipating between grasping fingers. What was I about to say? I suddenly couldn't remember. In fact, I couldn't remember all of the things that had been bothering me.

"Oh this is nice ," I said after a few minutes.

"Right?" Theo asked. "They have the real stuff down here."

I started giggling. When Austin asked what was funny, I just shook my head and giggled harder. That caused them to start laughing, too.

"You're stoned!" Austin said.

"I sure am!" I replied. "So are you."

"Mmm hmm," he replied, relaxing back into his chair.

"Remember when we first got baked together?" Bradyn asked Theo.

"Freshman year?" Theo asked.

Bradyn said, "Yep. I came back from a party and you were trying to pour alcohol into the iron for some stupid reason."

Theo nodded like it was simple. "I was making tequila steam."

For some reason, this was the funniest thing I'd ever heard. I fell apart into a fit of giggles.

"She's definitely feeling it," Theo said.

"You were making tequila steam, and I was worn out from striking out at the party," Bradyn went on. "You told me you had an ounce of weed, so we covered up the smoke detector in our room with Tupperware."

"Duct taped the Tupperware right over it," Theo agreed.

"But we forgot about it, and our dorm RA discovered it the next day. Remember what he told us?"

Theo mimicked a deeper voice. "Don't tamper with the smoke detectors. Crack a window and blow the smoke outside like everyone else does!"

"That's when we learned our RA was cool," Bradyn said. "The rest of the semester was easy after that."

"You know I heard he ended up becoming a judge?" Theo said. "Crazy times."

It's no crazier than you being a dentist , I wanted to say. Somehow, despite my less-than-sober state, I managed to stop myself from blurting it out in front of the others.

Bradyn got up and went to the complimentary liquor bar. "I can't imagine him as a judge. I still remember him doing keg stands during finals week and passing out naked in the hallway. Anyone want a drink?"

"Yes, please," Austin said. Wyatt and Peter nodded, but Theo and I shook our heads.

"All-inclusive resorts are great," Peter said. "This is a nice one, too. They don't water down their drinks."

"I don't know about that," Austin replied. "I've been drinking pretty much non-stop since we got here and haven't felt a thing."

"No way," Bradyn said while handing out glasses of rum and Coke. "If anything, the drinks here are stronger than I expected."

Austin sipped his and immediately made a noise. "Yeah, now, you see this? This tastes like a real drink. Nothing like what they've been serving me."

I couldn't keep it in any longer. I started giggling, then tried to stop myself, which only made me laugh even harder. Soon I was doubled over on the couch, tears streaming down my face.

"Did I miss a joke?" Wyatt asked.

"I think she's just that stoned," Austin replied.

I pointed at his drink. "That's the first alcohol you've had all week!"

"It most certainly is not," he replied indignantly.

I nodded emphatically. "It is. It's the first alcohol that's touched your lips. I know this because I told the resort manager to make sure you're only given virgin drinks all week!"

Austin blinked at me, then down at his drink. He took another sip, smacking his lips, and his eyes widened. "Well I'll be damned."

Everyone else roared with laughter with me. Wyatt even pointed at Austin while holding his stomach from laughing so hard. Austin just looked at each of us in turn, like he was confused about what was happening.

Then he busted out laughing, too.

"When'd you tell the manager?" he asked.

"The day we arrived!" I revealed. "At check-in!"

He smiled down at his drink. "Son of a bitch."

"I didn't think it would work. There's too many opportunities to drink. But the manager personally spoke to every member of the staff. You've been given non-alcohol beer, non-alcoholic wine, and mixed drinks without liquor."

"What about the alcohol in your room?" Peter asked.

"I haven't tried them. I've spent all my time around the resort."

"I'm so sorry," I said when I finally stopped laughing. "I was mad that you convinced me to quit my job while I was drunk the night of the wedding."

"Damn, she really got even with you," Bradyn said. "Remind me never to cross Joanna."

Austin downed the rest of his drink. "Okay, so you signed me up for a jungle hike, and I've been given non-alcoholic drinks all week. Any other surprises I should know about?"

"That was it!" I replied, giggling some more.

"Joanna is definitely baked," Theo said, helping pull me back up onto the couch.

"Relax!" I told him. "You're acting like I'm going to spill a bunch of secrets or something."

Theo smirked, but I could see the alarm in his eyes.

"What secrets do you have to spill?" Bradyn asked.

Across from us, Austin tensed.

"Stuff about Landon," I replied. "He's really good in bed."

Bradyn groaned. "I don't want to hear about my brother."

"Are you sure?" I asked. "What about the way he uses his finger to—"

Bradyn stuck his fingers in his ears. "La la la! I can't hear you!"

"Want to head back down to the arcade?" Peter asked. "I want to play foosball."

"Hell yeah," Bradyn said. "Let's do it. Y'all in?"

"Pass," I said.

"I'm gonna hang out and make sure Joanna gets back to her room okay," Theo said. "I might join you later."

"Same," Austin said. "Y'all have fun, though."

The three of them left the room. Then the only ones who remained were me, Theo, and Austin.

"I can't believe you jerked me around like that," Austin said, refilling his drink from the bar.

"I can't believe you didn't notice."

"No kidding," Theo agreed. "I could understand falling for it for a day. Maybe two. But this long…"

Austin was chuckling to himself. "That's one hell of a prank, I have to give it to you." He glanced over his shoulder. "You two are probably hoping I'll leave so you can have some alone time. That's why you were in his room in the first place, right?"

I shared a look with Theo. "Are you going to cock-block us now to get even?"

"Wouldn't dream of it," Austin replied. "I'll keep my lips sealed and let you two have your fun."

I breathed a small sigh of relief.

"Or," Austin said, sinking back into his chair, "I could stay and watch."