Chapter 6 - Sierra

I haven't cried so hard in years. The turmoil of emotions that once plagued me when Felix left unannounced returns now as I'm faced with reality.

I'd been peaceful up until now, able to get a good night's rest every night for almost a year. Not being haunted by the memories of someone I fell deeply in love with, I'd finally found my peace.

Only for him to shake my world and pull the rug out from under me. Just by showing me his face again and revealing his true identity to me.

I haven't quite wrapped my head around the fact that he's a weredragon. In a matter of a day, the veil had been lifted, and I now see the world for what it truly is.

Maybe that's why Felix was different. I always thought he stood out above the rest, an angel in a human meat suit sent to lead me toward my true purpose on Earth. Except, his meat suit can shape-shift into that of a dragon. Everything I knew before was a lie.

Even the part where I thought I was healed from him abandoning me. I didn't count on ever seeing his face again, so it was easy to bury the pain. It had taken me years to get to the point of zen.

Now, my entire world is shaken, my heart tearing at the seams of the sutures I'd used to stitch the pieces back together.

Climbing out of bed, I take to the rug and cross my legs, placing my hands together as I close my eyes. I have little interest in looking around the bedroom, hoping I can somehow find a way to leave this place. One night here spent restlessly tossing and turning is enough for me.

I have a yoga studio to get back to and clients who wait for me to teach classes. I can't be stuck here—

"Breathe, Sierra…" I remind myself gently. Right now, there's nothing I can do to change my circumstances. I have no control over this, and when the time is right, I'll deal with how to leave this island.

"Peace…. Peace… Peace…" I mantra in my mind, searching for the inner peace that's been stripped away thanks to my father and Felix.

Pfft… Men!

Always spoiling everything when things are just starting to go well.

"Peace…"

Breathing into that peace, a lilting sigh escapes my lips as my shoulders finally relax. A speck of light enters my vision, and I'm just about to lose myself through it when a door crashes in.

My eyes snap open, brows furrowed from the rude interruption, when I turn my face to see Felix standing at the door.

Oh, no…

"I thought I told you to leave me alone," I grate through gritted teeth, unfurling from the floor and crossing my arms over my chest. It's a defense mechanism—one that barely works when he's in the room right now. His presence is enough to set off the time bomb inside, ready to explode into a flood of tears again.

I gulp hard, trying to remain as unfazed as I can be on the outside. He doesn't deserve to see how I truly feel inside.

He strolls into the room casually, shoving his hands into the loose pockets of his sweatpants. I try not to pay much attention to the fact that he's bulked up now. The Felix I knew years ago was lankier.

Not that it matters, I remind myself mentally. Who cares if he'd become hotter?

"I can't leave you alone, Sierra," he says as he stops by a shelf on the wall and casually strokes a silver bird ornament. "You are meant to be my mate, and we have a lot to discuss."

"There's nothing to talk about, Felix…" A shiver passes through my spine when I say his name aloud. I realize I haven't let his name leave my tongue in years. When I walked out of my therapist's office after my final session, I decided that it would be the last time I ever said his name.

That was a good four years ago. Ever since that day, I'd been working toward my goals and only ever thinking about him as a distant, faint memory that had no place to be spoken about.

Shuddering as the chill passes through me, I continue, "... I wanna go home."

Felix stops stroking the ornament and turns his face to me, the coy smile on his lips falling away. "You—you want to go home?" he hesitates, brows furrowing as he straightens up.

For some reason, unbeknownst to me, he appears surprised. I can't tell why, and truthfully, I don't care.

"What did you think, Felix?" I bite back bitterly, spinning on my heel to turn away. With my arms still folded across my chest, I'm giving myself the comfort and strength I need, so I don't crack right now. "Did you think we could just pick up from where we left off?" I scoff.

There's a moment of silence that stretches like palpable tension in the air. It's so evident it could be cut through with a knife.

When I hear the thump of his footstep as he steps forward, I snap back to glare at him in warning. He notices that warning and doesn't take another step forward, hanging near the wall.

I don't want him near me.

"I don't wish to pick up where we left off, Sierra," he admits, hanging his head as if he's too ashamed to speak.

He should be!

"I wish to start afresh. Now that you know who I really am…" There's a pause as he lifts his head, eyes remorseful. "... What I really am , I was hoping you would understand."

"I don't care to understand anything!" I bite back, exasperation causing me to throw my arms up. "I don't care what you are or why I'm here! I just wanna go home!"

Felix takes a deep breath, then exhales with a puff. "Unfortunately, I can't take you home just yet. Your father—"

"I don't care about my dad! He's the one who got me into this mess in the first place! Just take me home!"

I'm too emotional to care that tears have sprung to the surface of my eyes and threatened to escape. I can't be near this man—or weredragon—any longer. I just want to go home.

"He is the one who got you into this mess, and now there are things we need to take care of," Felix reveals. Through the haze of tears, I notice him hesitating—stuck between wanting to come forward and hanging back.

"... Your father is here, on the island, and I can't take you back until we've dealt with him."

"Can't…? Or won't?" I ask, glowering at him. Maybe it's because I'm grappling at straws, trying to find a good reason for even considering being in his presence. After what he did to me, he doesn't deserve the privilege of seeing my face. It's the hurt and pain that wishes to be soothed if he can take responsibility for his actions.

It makes him uncomfortable, as he turns his face away. "C-can't. We have rules that we need to follow."

Anger brims to the surface, vile words caught on the tip of my tongue. I don't know why I even considered giving him a chance to redeem himself. He'd just gone and proved he didn't care about what he did to me.

All he cares about is his responsibilities to what he is—whatever that is. It's not like I care about any of that.

What about his responsibilities to me? To the promise of undying love and always being there for me? It was a promise he'd broken, which tore me to pieces.

I shouldn't care this much, but it hurts me even now.

I take a deep breath and ask, "What will happen to my dad?"

"No harm will come to him," Felix assures me as he turns to leave.

"Then why do you need me here?"

He pauses and glances over his shoulder, although I can barely see his face. "You'll understand soon enough. As soon as you decide to listen."

With that, Felix leaves the room and shuts the door with a loud thud. I'm propelled forward, running toward the door and trying the handle again.

It's locked, though I'm not surprised because it's been locked since my arrival the day before. Still, my heart sinks when I realize that there is no way out for me. I'm unwilling to leap off the castle and leave it to fate to decide if I'll survive the fall.

I hardly trust fate ever since it led me back to Felix.

I don't know everything, but I don't care to know. Felix seems determined not to own up to what he did—to bring up the past. If he thinks this is a clean slate, he has something else coming for him.

After all, he's the one who left me. I had to learn how to survive without him, without his love. He can't expect me to accept what he wants. I'm not the weak and vulnerable young girl I once was.

***

Seven Years Ago

"Oh, my God!" I blink fervently at the screen in case I'm imagining things. Rubbing my eyes with a fist, I stare at the email and read the message again.

Springing out of bed excitedly, I yelp with cheer. "Yes! I did it! I got in!"

Punching fists in the air and wiggling my butt, I can't hear anything over the sounds of my excitement. When the excitement fizzles down, and my breath comes in hot pants, I frown as I take a look at the bed.

Felix's side is empty, the sheets ruffled from where he'd been sleeping. The first thing I did when I opened my eyes was check my email. I'd been anticipating the reply from the college so much, that I didn't realize Felix wasn't beside me.

Lugging in deep breaths, I calm myself enough to go in search of him. He must be around the apartment somewhere, and I'll prank him by telling him I didn't get in.

I'd love to see the look on his face. After all, attaining a business course was his idea. He says he sees potential in me to make my dreams a reality. It also helps that I'm good with numbers. I might suck at stirring together drinks at a bar, but that's why he doesn't see me working for someone else.

My boyfriend believes in me and my ability to own my own business. Be my own boss.

I couldn't have asked for someone better.

Smiling mischievously as I pad down the small hallway toward the kitchen, I half-expect to find him preparing breakfast. Except, there isn't a whiff of food coming down the hallway.

Maybe he just woke up.

Shrugging my shoulders, I make my way into the kitchen of the apartment we've been sharing for six months. The attraction between Felix and I was instantaneous, leading to a quick first date. Everything else has been happening quite fast, I must admit.

I've only just turned twenty, and I've found my soulmate, the love of my life. Felix calls it fate, while I believe God has finally answered my prayers and sent an angel to me.

"Felix! Babe, where are you?!" I call out gently, my voice echoing off the walls and returning emptily to my ears. I frown, standing in the center of the kitchen and doing a quick three-sixty.

It's empty.

So are the living room and the bathroom.

"Felix?!" I call out again, standing in the hallway before rushing back to the bedroom. I pick up my phone and dial his number. Maybe he's gone out to pick up breakfast for us, I think with a smile as I lift the phone to my ear. He's always doing sweet things, like buying me my favorite flowers or serving breakfast in bed.

He's perfect and everything I could have wanted in a man.

Except for the part where the call goes to voicemail, where I notice a note sticking out from underneath the lampshade on my nightstand.

I pick it up, expecting to read sweet words on the paper that will warm my heart. But the words neatly printed in Felix's exquisite handwriting are what shatters my heart.

"mi ángel… It pains me to tell you this, but I have to leave. Always follow your dreams. I will love you forever."

Falling to a heap on the floor, I crumble the note in one hand just as the sob escapes my throat. Howling into my hands, I can't believe that he's gone.

With no indication that he was going to leave. Not an argument, no warning signs. Nothing.

We were so happy. This doesn't make any sense.

As the strength in my bones wavers, my every nerve-ending tingles while my heart scatters on the floor with the tears I shed. I can't breathe, think straight, or go on without the love of my life.

How will I survive? With only a few simple words and no apology, I don't want to live anymore.