Chapter 11 - Felix

Yesterday was a bust. I can only hope that today provides another clean slate, a fresh start. With my second chances piling up with failed attempts to get closer to Sierra, I'm starting to believe I have this whole thing wrong.

Maybe her father doesn't know what he's talking about. Unless there was someone else after me who broke her heart—but that wouldn't explain the horror in her eyes when she saw me in human form on that balcony.

Sighing with a heavy heart, I pick a few more cherry blossoms from the garden in the courtyard, gathering my thoughts along with the bunch of flowers in my hand. It's the slightest gesture of apology, but one I'm hoping works after my brief outburst at Sierra.

I didn't mean to snap. It was only lunch they'd missed. Apart from caring about her well-being, what was more concerning was what I witnessed when I joined the game.

As I recall yesterday's odd encounter, I felt a cold shiver. Not only was I met with more defiance, but I also witnessed Sierra practically drooling for another man.

Point of note—don't take her anywhere near Brantley.

Blinking blankly as I stare up at the balcony on the tenth floor, I wonder if she's awake yet. My cowardice has me mentally recoiling, deciding against facing her myself. Sierra's become feistier than what I knew her to be. I guess Draco was right—she's changed over the years.

Has her feelings for me changed, too? I'm not sure. I'd often hoped that she'd feel the same way after all this time, that we could just pick up from where we left off. In those moments when I'd gaze beyond the island's dome and wonder if things would work out between us, I didn't consider that perhaps her feelings could have changed for me.

I'd been so confident that my feelings would be reciprocated, but now that fate has led us back to each other, I've seen a side of her I didn't think was possible for her to possess. Gone is the gentle-voiced young lady; in her place, a woman who knows exactly what she wants.

I don't seem to be the one she wants, though. Even as I enter the castle, so confident of who I am and my love for her, I still choose the cowardly option.

I'll just ask Kairo how she's doing and give her the bouquet of cherry blossoms to give to Sierra. I thought having her see me on the rugby field yesterday would incite something in her, but I was wrong. That's why I've picked out her favorite flowers, hoping to sweep her off her feet like I did in the past.

"Good morning," comes Sierra's fragrant voice, jolting me from my thoughts just when I round the corner leading toward the elevator.

Freezing on the spot, my instincts kick in, and I hide the flowers behind my back. Cowardly instincts, I'm aware, but I didn't count on meeting Sierra in the hallway.

I didn't think she'd be down already, let alone without Kairo accompanying her.

"Good morning, Sierra," I bid curtly before peering around her with a frown. "Where's Kairo?"

Sierra shrugs, pointedly avoiding my eyes when she inspects her nails instead. Though the nonchalant gesture comes as a surprise, the fact that she's stopped in the hallway to give me the time of day is what I hang on to.

I'll take the little crumbs I can get, especially since she shot down being my mate. It's not that I planned to force her into something she doesn't want. The situation isn't ideal, considering that we share a past.

I just didn't want her to skip a meal. Hopefully, she can see that I care for her.

"I'm meeting her outside," Sierra replies coolly as she finally looks up. "Why? Am I not supposed to be strolling around unsupervised?"

"I didn't say that," I quickly defend with a frown. "I was only asking."

"Good," she relents, eyes flitting to the arm I have twisted behind me. "Who's that for?" she points at the flowers, prompting me to clear my throat nervously. Fumbling, I lift my arm from behind me.

There's no point in hiding, but the skepticism on her face leads me to say, "Oh, these?" with a chuckle. "These are for Lily. Draco asked me to bring flowers in for his mate."

Disappointed flashes in Sierra's amber eyes so prominently that I'm instantly filled with regret. I shouldn't have lied, but I seem to be tripping over my sense of morality around her. It's driving me insane not knowing what she's thinking; the back-and-forth between hot and cold behavior is so frustrating, that I want to run away. I probably deserve it for all the hurt I caused her, but it's driving me insane.

I could have sworn she'd been ogling me on the field yesterday until I put the rugby vest over my head. Did she not like it? Did it put her off me and send her attention toward Brantley, a warrior dragon?

"Oh," she shrugs, brushing her disappointment aside.

It's only my regret that lingers, hanging over my head like a dark cloud. I could have extended my arm and offered her the flowers I'd picked especially for her. I'm just too afraid of being met with rejection.

Clearing my throat again to cut through the awkward tension between us, I ask, "Are you enjoying your stay on the island?"

A frown flits past her face before she nods. "Yes. The island is gorgeous. It's a real shame that the world doesn't know about it's existence."

It feels like she's insinuating something else. Something that prompts me to reply accordingly.

"The dragon race only consists of a few thousand of us. Our kind fears the rejection we'd face if we revealed ourselves."

"You don't believe that humans can stomach the truth?" she asks with a raised brow. The intensity of her stare has me convinced that we're not talking about dragon shifters and humans in general.

This is personal.

"Being shown the truth sometimes has your kind building higher walls. What good will the island be if they refuse to appreciate it?"

Sierra finally meets my eyes, a soft gasp escaping her lips. The walls she'd built have her startled, gulping as if she'd seen the truth for the first time.

Unless I'm being too hopeful.

She tears her gaze away and stares at the floor. "Is that why you're keeping my father locked away? So he doesn't expose you?"

"Essentially, yes," I concede. "He lied to you, Sierra. His life was never in danger—"

Sierra cuts me off by lifting a hand in the air, glaring at me through narrowed eyes of contempt. "I don't want to hear about it, Felix," she grates. "He's not the only one who lied to me."

Struck through my heart as if her words were a sword, my jaw drops. "Sierra, I—"

"Save it," she says bluntly, folding her arms across her chest. "I'm only interested in knowing what happens next so I can leave too."

My frown deepens, wondering why she's determined to leave again. I thought she wasn't opposed to being here, on the island. Perhaps she's changed her mind again.

After all, it's not like she's willing to be my mate.

"A decision hasn't been made," I tell her. "I was hoping you'd decide what happens to him when you become my mate."

Sierra's shoulders tense as she stares at my face blankly. "That's not happening," she says matter-of-factly. "I'm not gonna be your mate, so you get to decide what happens to my dad."

I open my mouth to say something back, falling short of a reply. My hesitation gives Sierra enough time to saunter past me, flipping her braid over her shoulder as she exits the front door.

Blinking into the abyss of utter confusion, I do not attempt to run after her. I don't understand what's going through her mind or why she's so calm about everything. It seems she doesn't care how long she's here, even if she doesn't want to be my mate.

She's made that clear.

She sure has succeeded if wanting to make my life a misery is her plan.

Why did I expect anything less? I had this coming for what I did to hurt her.