17. Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen

Oliver

I t's been two months since Ronan and I decided to pursue our version of dating. It sucks not being able to be seen in public, or be able to do anything, really. Of course, we spend almost every night together at my apartment, but it's not enough for me. I want to be seen with him, to hold his hand in public.

To claim him as mine.

Spring break starts tomorrow and I've been trying to plan a little getaway for us. I say try, because I keep failing at what to do. I don't know where to go or what could be fun. I haven't even brought it up to Ronan yet, because I haven't asked if he has any plans for spring break.

Rubbing my temples, my head jerks up at the knock on my office door. Hoping it's Ronan, I start to sit up, but instantly deflate when Nate walks in the office.

"Don't look so bummed to see me," he jokes, walking into the office and closing the door.

"Sorry, I wasn't expecting to see anyone," I say, hoping he can't tell I'm lying.

"I was just coming by to see if you wanted to head over to the sports bar and get some food."

Knowing I'll see Ronan later, I nod my head before replying, "Yeah man, let's go."

Lifting my phone off my desk, I type out a quick text to Ronan, letting him know where I'm going, and telling him I hope I see him later. When he quickly replies ‘ okay ,' I shove my phone into my back pocket and stand up.

"Do you wanna walk?"

"Sure," he says, walking in front of me out of the office.

We walk in comfortable silence out of the building and through the quad. Luckily, the sports bar isn't too far, so we're sitting at a table in no time at all.

We order a couple beers and some wings. Once the waitress leaves, I turn to Nate. "You ready for this break?"

"Hell yeah, man. I have no idea what I'm going to do, but I need a rest."

"Same." Knowing that Nate has lived here his whole life, I figure I should ask him if he knows of anywhere I can go for the break. "So, I've been wanting to get out of town for a couple days, but I have no idea where to go. Do you have any ideas?"

"Well, what type of things are you wanting to do? Relax? Hike? Beach? There are so many options."

"I'm not really sure. Definitely relax, maybe add some hiking. It doesn't need to be the beach; I see that enough here."

"Have you ever been to Joshua Tree National Park?"

"Uh, no. How far is it?" I've heard of it before, but I've never been there. I do know it's supposed to be beautiful.

"About three hours."

I wince, thinking of how long the drive would be. But the thought of being so far away that I can walk around with Ronan where no one knows us filters through my mind, and I smile. "Hmm. I might have to look into that. Is there a lot to do?"

"Camping and shit. But if you're not into camping, there's a couple towns close by. Yucca Valley or Twenty-nine Palms. There will be a lot to do there. And you'll be able to rent a house or get a hotel, then you can hike at the park instead of camping out there."

"Yes." I point at him. "Now that I can do. I'm not a big camper, but I can do the hiking thing as long as I have a room to go back to."

"I think it would be fun. You would have a blast. Are you planning on going by yourself?"

"No, I'm planning on taking someone," I tell him, taking another sip of my beer and glancing away.

"Oh, yeah? Someone special?" he asks as the waitress sets our food down. I'm thankful when she asks if there's anything else we need because it gives me a few moments to gather my thoughts.

When the waitress leaves, Nate turns his eyes back on me. "Yeah, someone special, but it's still new."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry," he says sheepishly, taking a sip of his beer.

"No, you didn't. It's really new and I don't want to jinx it just yet."

"I completely understand. Well, I hope you have a great time. When you come back, we should try to get together for a baseball game."

"Hell yeah, man, let's do it."

We eat the rest of our food, making small talk between us. After sitting in the restaurant for about an hour, we head out. Ronan texted me while we were eating, letting me know he was on his way over, which has me racing home to my apartment. Luckily, I had given him an extra key for the nights that he got done early and I was still at BU.

Walking through the front door, the sound from the TV draws my attention, my feet taking me into the living room. My chest warms at the scene in front of me. Ronan is sound asleep on my couch, wrapped up in one of my throw blankets. Ember is lying next to him on the blanket and his hand is on her back. For as much as they bicker, I'm momentarily stunned. Taking out my phone, I quickly snap a picture, not knowing if this will ever happen again.

Tiptoeing over to him, I kneel on the floor beside the couch. Reaching out, I swipe the hair off his forehead, placing a kiss where his hair just was. His eyes blink open, a smirk forming on his face when his eyes focus.

"What a way to wake up," he rasps, his voice thick with sleep. He looks down, seeing Ember in his embrace, and he rolls his eyes. "I guess sometimes she isn't so bad."

"Sorry I'm late." I tap his legs and he sits up, grabbing Ember, making room for me to sit down next to him. "It's finally Spring break."

"Finally. This semester is dragging by. I just want it to be over with." He says, rubbing her back while she purrs and closes her eyes.

"Me too." Sitting back, I grab Ronan's other hand and interlock our fingers. "Do you have any plans for the break?"

"Nope. Was planning to hang around here. Spend some time with you, of course."

"I have an idea if you're up for it."

"Lay it on me," he says, turning his body to face me.

"I was talking to Nate earlier, about places to get away to," his eyebrows raise and I clarify. "I didn't say who I was going to go with, but that I wanted to get away for a few days. He recommended Joshua Tree. Have you ever been there?" He shakes his head so I continue, "It's a national park, but I figured we could stay in town a few miles away, either at a rental or a hotel, maybe even head into the park to go hiking. I wanted some time with you outside of these walls, where we could be together in public. But if you're not okay with that, we can definitely stay here; that's fine too." I'm starting to ramble and I'm not quite sure why. I doubt he's going to say no, but still, it'll be the first time we're actually away together.

"Oliver," his soft voice pulls me in and I glance up into his eyes. "I would love to go out of town with you. When were you thinking of leaving and how long were you wanting to stay?"

"Um, I haven't gotten that far yet. It was something that came up at dinner and I figured I would ask you to see if it was something you wanted to do."

"Well, I do. Let's google some things and see if we can find somewhere to stay. And we're splitting everything fifty-fifty." I go to protest when he cuts me off. "Please, just because I'm younger doesn't mean I don't have my own money."

"I wasn't going to say anything about your age. I was going to say that since it was my idea, I should be the one to pay."

"No, that's not how it's going to work."

"Fine."

We both take out our phones, planning for a trip away for a couple days. I can't wait to get away for a little bit and spend time out in the open.

The drive to Joshua Tree wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. We spent the whole drive singing along to the radio, snacking on candy and chips, and stopping twice since Ronan couldn't hold his bladder after downing three sodas. Being able to enjoy the ride was a great feeling. Nate didn't plan to leave town, so he's watching Ember for me, so that's helping me relax.

We ended up renting a small house on the outside of town next to the park. It's secluded enough that we'll have privacy, but still only a few minutes from the town. We drive straight to the house, going inside and unpacking our clothes before getting back into the car and driving to town.

"Keep a lookout for a grocery store. We need to get some items to make dinner," I say, backing out of the driveway and heading down the road.

"Can you cook? Cause I can't."

"I can cook some things. We can walk around the store and see what looks good."

"Yeah, let' s do that."

We drive around town for a couple minutes before we find a grocery store. We park and head inside, grabbing a shopping cart on the way. We take our time walking up and down the aisles, each of us throwing in food and snacks. Once the cart is semi full, we check out and head back toward the rental house.

Standing in the kitchen, I start opening the bags, pulling out the food and setting it on the counter.

"What about we make baked garlic chicken tonight? We can save the steaks for tomorrow?" I ask as I start putting groceries away.

"Sounds good. What do you want me to do?"

"Can you peel the potatoes and I'll start the chicken?"

Working side by side, we get the food into the oven in no time. Once the food is cooking, we head toward the couch, sitting next to each other.

"I'm glad we were able to get away," I say, snuggling up next to Ronan.

"Me too. It really fucking sucks to have to keep this a secret."

"I know." It really does fucking suck. There are so many times when I want to be honest and open about everything, but I don't know how it will affect my job. Or affect Ronan getting his degree. And I can't risk either of those things. "Just a little bit longer, right?"

"Yeah," he sighs, not saying anything else .

Fuck, I really hope he doesn't think this is too much and ends things. It's a lot, I know it is, but we can't risk it. Both of us have a lot to lose if this gets out and is not received well.

Wanting to get my mind off the train of thoughts I'm currently headed, I reach my hand under Ronan's shirt, feeling his skin. "The food won't be done for about an hour."

"Oh yeah? And what should we do in that hour?" he purrs.

"I was thinking you could fuck me."

Ronan bolts upright, sputtering out incoherent sounds. "Oliver, I am not going to fuck you for the first time while rushing and waiting for the food to cook."

"We don't have to rush," I say quickly, sitting up with him.

"We would have to rush and I don't want to do that. I want to take my time with you, but Oliver?" He waits until I make eye contact with him before continuing, "I'm not rushing you, am I?"

Is he serious? Rushing me? Laughing, I shake my head. "We've been together for two months and haven't fucked yet. I would say that's the opposite of rushing."

"I didn't want to rush you. This is all still new to you."

"It's not anymore." Sliding onto his lap, I straddle his legs, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. "I know who I am and I know what I want. And I want you. I might not have been with a man before, but that doesn't mean I'm unsure or not ready. I'm ready to take that next step with you."

"Okay, but not right now."

Huffing, I shake my head, but relent, knowing he's right. "Fine, but tonight. You're mine. Or I'm yours. Whichever is fine with me. It's time."

"Hell yes," Ronan takes my mouth, his tongue sliding inside. Pulling away, he rests his forehead against mine. "Let's shower now so we can eat and get naked."

Smiling, I stand up, grabbing his hand and lifting him off the couch. "As long as we can shower together."