9. No Backsliding, All Backbone

NINE

NO BACKSLIDING, ALL BACKBONE

BAILEY

T his has to be the best first kiss I’ve ever received from a man so hot he melts me. Then we come face to face with William interrupting us, the last person I want to see tonight.

“Do I mind if you interrupt? Hell yeah, I do,”Kris says, steady and strong.

“And who the fuck are you?” William demands to know.

“I’m her boyfriend. ” Kris’ words charge through me, spreading like wildfire; if only it were real. He waltzes me away, refusing to give me up. William follows, relentless, though, tapping him again. Kris hisses, “He’s about to lose a hand.”

“I just want to talk with her.” William insists.

“She doesn’t want to.” The two men arguing over me combined with more twirling by Kris has my brain swimming in my head.

“Yes, I do.” I push away, stopping all movement and swallowing my fears. “Maybe it’s the champagne, or my time with you, Kris, but I feel stronger. So let me have this moment of closure with him.”

The way he stares down at me with his jaw tight worries me. “Did you forget how much he hurt you? And yet you want to speak with him? You shouldn’t give him the time of day.”

If I didn’t know better, I’d say that sounded rather protective. I like it. It’s exactly how I’d want a boyfriend to show up for me.

“I know it doesn’t make sense, Kris, but a final conversation is what I need for closure.”

Kris scowls. “He doesn’t deserve you.” He leans over me and kisses my forehead, and there’s something so endearing about it. My heart palpitates before any other part of me can react, and then he walks away, leaving me stunned.

A small crowd of people have gathered, watching the entire incident transpire, whispering among themselves.

“Jesus Christ. Let’s step out,” William insists, and I follow, keeping my eyes out for any sign of Vanessa.

On the enclosed veranda of the lodge, right outside of the reception room, he pauses under a heater. There are four of them across the space, yet it’s still cold. I’m very aware of how the change in temperature forces my nipples to pebble. I cross my arms to hide them from him.

“Well, what do you want?” It kills me how, when things ended between us at first, I didn’t have the backbone to scream at him. Tonight, I’m ready.

“I hate the way things ended between us, Bay. I’ve tried to reach you so many times over the past year, but you never answer.”

“There’s a reason for that. You chose to fuck, and marry, my cousin. I think that gives me the right to ignore every text, phone call, and knock on my door.” I raise my voice and refuse to play this sick game with him.

“I never wanted things to end between us. If I had my way, you’d be my beautiful blushing bride today.”

“And Vanessa would be what, your side piece?”

“No. I miss you, Bay.” He reaches up like he wants to touch my cheek. I flinch back.

He continues to pursue, as if coming in for a kiss. I push at his chest.

“Don’t, Will.”

“We were good once, weren’t we?”

“Yeah. Before you cheated and messed it all up.”

“I never meant to hurt you.” For a split second, his dark wavy hair falls into his stormy blue eyes like it had a hundred times before. It used to be the most sexy, sweet thing about him, and I almost miss him. Almost.

Then, out of the corner of my eye, I spot Kris across the way. He’s talking with a woman I don’t recognize. Not a guest of the wedding, but a skier, judging by her jacket and snow pants. A jealous pang takes hold in my chest, but he’s not so easily distracted, keeping his eyes on me. In my next breath, a man in ski garb joins them and they finish their conversation with Kris and walk away.

Relieved, I lock eyes with him. His fists are tight on the pub table in front of him, shaking his head at me like he’s disappointed I’m not done with William yet. Something about it makes me come to my senses. Kris is there for me, bolstering me up, in solidarity and support. William never has been.

I turn back, ready to put it all out there. “The reality is, William, that I’m not your bride. I’m the scorned woman, the one your family didn’t think was good enough to be on the arm of an attorney general. The one you cheated on for reasons I’ll never understand. You humiliated me, and if you had truly loved me, you would have stayed by my side and not strayed. You would have stood up to your family. But you didn’t.”

“I wish I could start all over with you.”

I square my shoulders and face him with no more regrets. “You can’t. I have no desire for you anymore. So stop wasting my time with texts and calls. What you need to do is grow up. Vanessa is an amazing woman. Be better for her than you were with me.” With those words shouted into existence, my heart soars like I’m freed.

“William? There you are. We need to cut the cake. Oh, hello, Bay.” Vanessa tosses her hair, her chin high in the air, peering down her nose at me.

“Hi, Nessa.” Sad how this business with my-ex-her-husband drove a stake right through any bond we had left, parting us forever.

William casts eyes on me, imploring me, like I could be his savior, or his way out from a situation he stumbled into. But he’s wrong about me. I’m just a girl seeking to be loved and to love. I finally see I got lucky to get out of this relationship. My life plays through my mind in a flash, how things might have been if we’d stayed together.

His mother would never have given me a moment’s peace. I’d be stuck within the world of politics and law, and hadn’t I had enough of that my entire life? And the sex? Meh.

One glance at Kris again and my panties are on the verge of flooding. My insides twist and my lips still tingle from the feel of his. I have to get back to him.

“I wish you two the best.” Ignoring William, I surprise Vanessa with a hug, and whisper in her ear, “If you ever need to talk. I’m here for you.”

Sadly, as I confidently strut away, I’m certain I’ll be hearing from her at some point, probably crying over William leaving her for another woman.

Kris’ smile grows as I get closer. I don’t know where this weekend will lead, but I know one thing for sure. I’m marching forward, and I’m not stuck in the past.

“Hello.” I stop in front of him within arm’s reach, hoping he’ll take me in and kiss me again. His hands remain in his pockets.

“Hey.”

“Looks like I left the past behind.”

“And you look radiant for it.”

“Thanks,” I smile ear to ear.

“Feel better?”

“I do. Thank you for trusting me to talk with William. It was the closure I needed.”

“For the record, he was one second away from getting his head ripped off, if he dared try to kiss you again.”

I laugh. “I would have loved to see William’s head in your bare hands.”

“Can you do something for me?”

“Maybe,” I tease.

“Can you never say his name game?”

More possessiveness. Damn, I like it. “I promise.”

We hear the emcee announce the cake cutting ceremony. I crinkle my nose at it.

“Should we skip the cake and go for a walk?” He holds out his arm.

“Yes, I believe I’m done here.” Although I’m not ready to leave our bubble. If we do, the date is over, and it’s back to reality. I don’t know where that would leave us.

We stray away from the ballroom, arm in arm, meandering through the sprawling old hotel. We don’t speak, but sneak glances at each other here and there, grinning, unspoken words between us, until we stumble upon a set of windows with a view of the skating rink adjoining the building. Kids are on the ice chasing each other around. Parents and couples are skating hand in hand.

Kris turns to me, giddy as a boy on Christmas day. “Oh, you know we have to do this. Have you skated before?”

“It’s been a while.”

“Then come on. We can’t pass this up.”

“But I’m in my gown, and you’re in a tux.”

“So. Let’s live in the moment.”

His energy is contagious. Something about him would make me agree to anything he asks of me.

A few minutes later, he ties my rented skates for me, bundles me up in his tuxedo jacket, and rolls the long sleeves up my arms. So thoughtful. Such a perfect gentleman. A ten.

“Won’t you be cold without your jacket?” I ask.

“I run hot, all the time,” he says. It’s true, when I’m near him, the air temperature rises to a cozy level.

We hit the ice together. He’s gentle with me while I get my feel for skating again, holding onto my hand and guiding me around. Soon he skates backwards, facing me, holding both my hands tighter, and we’re skating and talking and laughing. He’s telling me funny hockey stories, from when he was a kid just starting out, to his time in Denver. I can see he’s a natural, the love for the game inherent.

Every second, I regret what I did to him in L.A. He seems like a great guy who didn’t deserve all my media scrutiny, and he’s absolutely right that I should have interviewed him and given him a chance to explain about him and Tia. What kind of journalist am I if I don’t present all sides of a situation to better inform the reader? Let the reader make their own judgements.

I’m neither judge nor jury, but until that whole situation happened, my morals and ethics hadn’t been challenged. Knowing what really happened now, things Kris refuses for me to tell him, there’s so much I’d do differently.

“Whoa!” My blade gets stuck on the ice and I go flying into his arms, but he doesn’t miss a beat. He catches me and swings me around, and we laugh like no one is watching and nothing else matters. Just the two of us on the ice.

We slide to a stop in the middle of the rink, the world slowly revolving around us as if we’re the center of the universe. Our arms circle each other, and all I see is him, and the way his eyes fill with desire.

He closes the gap between us, his head coming closer. My heart hammers in my chest and my mind struggles to contain the storm of emotions brewing. Then our lips meet in a gentle kiss, igniting a fire again within me. I let him in and every twirl of our tongue, every taste, is intoxicating.

It takes all of my willpower to pull away, desperate for air, yet I crave more of him all at once.

“You kissed me, but no one’s watching? We don’t have to fake it anymore,” I question him, my voice barely more than a whisper, trembling with uncertainty.

“Exactly. So shut up and kiss me, Irish.”

My frozen hands reach up behind his neck and pull his head down to meet my lips. Kiss after kiss, I burn for him, losing myself to the power of this new sexy connection. His stubble scratches my chin as I open my mouth, inviting in his tongue, dueling with it for dominance.

Never did I expect this night to end with my arms wrapped around a man like him. My heart thumps in my ears, faster and faster. He groans as his hands slip under the coat, up my bare back, fisting my hair. I gasp for air, letting his lips slide down my neck, licking my pulse.

I need him skin to skin and claw at his shirt, forgetting where we are… Until someone clears their throat near us. We both open our eyes to see a mother standing there covering her son’s eyes. He has to be about nine or ten.

“Do you think you could find someplace else to do this?” She asks with a scolding raised eyebrow.

We hurry and skate hand-in-hand to the edge and exit the ice, laughing all the way.

As every second ticks by on this strange and wonderful night, Kris melts my ice with his smoldering stares. We finish our skating session with cups of hot cocoa, leaning over the railing of the rink.

“Not as delicious as my Irish coffee, but I’ll take it.” I wink at him over the rim of the paper cup. “I’m really glad you were here for me tonight.”

“And saved you from making any mistakes, like backsliding with that asshole?”

“Especially that. Thank you. I owe you one.”

“Sure. I’ll let you know when I need a fake date.” He chuckles, but a piece of my heart cracks from it. It’s a reminder this isn’t meant to last. We put aside our past and our differences for one night. Party over. I dreaded the bursting of the bubble, and now it’s here.