Chapter Nine

CHAPTER NINE

Delilah

We decide to rent the motel room for a few extra hours.

Okay fine, I fell asleep after being banged into another dimension, and Raider no longer seems content to keep me in the back of his van. I don’t question him. I’m having too much fun cradled against his huge body, eating soggy French fries and watching Lockup on the grainy motel television.

His thick, hairy legs are stretched out on either side of mine, his feet hanging over the edge of the bed. He’s wearing boxers that could literally double as a boat sail. His lack of shirt means I’m surrounded by heat and the smell of satisfied male. Every few minutes, I turn my face to run my cheek in his ample chest hair, making him hum with contentment. There’s a heavy rod tucked between the cheeks of my bottom, but he seems happy to stroke my hair and straighten my dress, popping French fries into my mouth whenever I forget to eat.

I love the glowing knowledge that I’ve been possessed. I’m Raider’s girl. And he’s my big, brash, bully man. If it were possible to take an extended vacation on this bed and forget every worry in the world, I would consider it. But there are things we need to discuss before I can truly let my guard down, let myself enjoy everything this man has to offer. Something tells me I need to approach the subject of my reservations with caution, though, so we don’t lose this comfort we’ve gained from each other. I don’t want to lose it.

“So…” I turn off the television and scoot around, laying my head on one of his thighs. “Why don’t we just hang out here for a couple days?”

A rumble vibrates his king-sized frame. “Want to get you home. I can keep you safer there.”

“But…it’s not my home yet.” I play with the hem of my dress. “We haven’t even talked about it.”

He pinches my chin between two fingers, tilting my head back. “Your home is with me, Delilah.”

Dang. Is a decent conversation about this too much to hope for? I want to stay with Raider, but there needs to be an understanding. I’m not going to be cut off forever from the only remaining family I have left. Furthermore, if Raider is expecting me to leave my home and job, the least he can do is ask me nicely. I’m an independent woman with my own hopes and dreams, goddammit. He needs to fit into my life, same as I’d fit into his. “You were only supposed to keep me for two days,” I gently remind him. “I’m collateral, remember?”

Dark clouds roll into his expression, his scars turning white, looking like lightning slashing across his face. That giant chest begins to shudder up and down, the thigh muscles under my head clenching. “No one is taking you away from me.”

“Well, what’s your plan if my brother shows up with the money?”

“He won’t.”

“You don’t know that.” Irritation shoots me into a sitting position. “Look. It’s obvious you think my brother is a piece of shit, but I love him. He’s my piece of shit.” My throat tightens up. “You can’t just expect me to drop my entire life, Raider. Not after you’ve only known me such a short time. I don’t know a lot about relationships, but I think there should be compromises. Don’t you?”

His scars have deepened to a murderous red. “You might already be carrying my child in your belly. You’re damn well going to stay put where you’ll be safest.”

“Safe from whom?” I sass. “Men who kick my door down?”

My voice is raised now and there’s no help for it. His reminder that I could be pregnant makes me nervous, because I don’t know a damn thing about having or raising babies. And now I might be doing so with a man who doesn’t respect the life I’ve built or my family. Doesn’t even respect me enough to have a reasonable discussion about the expectations of our relationship.

“I’m done talking about this!” Raider bellows, smashing a fist down on the flimsy side table, making the receiver fly off the phone. “No more.”

I push off his chest and bound off the bed. “I’m done, too! And I’m not leaving this motel until my brother’s two days is up.” Stomping toward the bathroom, I throw fury at Raider over my shoulder. “You know what? I’m starting to think you don’t want your money at all. If we keep driving farther and farther away, he definitely won’t be able to make the deadline. Have you thought of that?”

He gives me an evasive look, his shoulders hunching. Well. I have no idea what that means and I don’t give a rat’s behind. My fury is catapulting around in my stomach; my skin is burning. Dammit, being angry is twice as awful when you’re scared, apparently. I’m not scared of Raider. Just scared of the unknown. Having my free will taken away. Never being surrounded ever again by familiar faces and walls. Worse, I’m afraid of what happens if Raider won’t ever compromise. Do I lose him?

“I’m not budging,” I try to say in a firm voice, but it cracks, right before I slam the bathroom door. A minute later, I step naked into the scalding shower, forcing myself to take long, calming breaths. I scrub my face with both hands and remind myself to be patient. Raider probably has as much experience with relationships as I do. In other words, he doesn’t have any experience. Over time, we’ll earn each other’s trust and he’ll understand that keeping in touch with my family or making decisions for myself won’t take me away from him.

My palm glides down my damp belly, resting on the flat surface. Was he right? Could I really be pregnant?

The possibility softens me. Makes the fight we’ve just had seem irrelevant in the face of something much more important. Determined to solve things with Raider—in other words, force him to communicate in something other than caveman language—I step out of the shower and wrap myself in a towel. I’m almost to the door when Raider’s deep timbre reaches me from the other room.

“I changed my mind,” he says. “I’m ready to get rid of her.” A pause. “Yeah. As soon as possible.”

White noise blows in my ears. Get rid of…me? Oh God. Shit. My fingers are shaking and bloodless where they clutch the thin, white towel to my chest. I was right to hold on to a thread of caution, wasn’t I? The men in my life never stay with one woman for long, shuffling them aside when they get bored. A man like Raider simply doesn’t do breakups, it seems. How could I develop feelings for a man who could be so callous? There’s a large part of me that still doesn’t believe I heard him correctly. I couldn’t have. But…what if Raider wanted a meek, accepting woman and my stubbornness turned him off? Made him change his mind?

Or what if he’s so sure my brother isn’t going to deliver the money, killing me is his way of punishing Roger? No…it can’t be. But what if?

I can’t take the chance. Even if there’s been some mistake, he’s all but confirmed I’m going to be the one in this relationship to give up their life without looking back. He’s demanding I do it without a second thought. What else is he going to demand that I don’t want to give?

Tears are streaming down my cheeks as I crouch down on the floor, riffling through my discarded clothes to find my cell phone. I’m surprised and relieved to see a message from Roger on the screen, and my numb fingers hurry to retrieve it.

Came up with the $

Tracked you north

Where the hell are you?

I cover my mouth to muffle my sob. Am I relieved or disappointed? My head hurts too much to tell. Right now, the man who crawled under my skin is an unknown, much as my heart screams the contrary. Insists I misunderstood what I heard. But Roger is familiar and safe. There’s no decision except to leave.

After punching in the name of the motel and finding out Roger is only twenty minutes away, I instruct him to pull around back when he arrives. Then I don my clothes in record time and climb out the tiny window, an ache already forming in the dead center of my chest.