Chapter 15

MINA

"You can tell me to fuck off if you want to," Daisy said. She followed me out into the back garden, leaving Ric inside to talk to the other men. "I just thought you might like to have another woman to talk to. Men can be so testosterone-y sometimes."

I glanced over to the vegetable garden where Terry was tending to the plants, clearly not paying any attention to us.

Feet bare, I walked across the neat lawn to the back of the garden where the roses grew. Amongst the trees and fragrant bushes were a pair of stone benches.

I lowered myself down onto one of them. "Yes, they can. I appreciate it, but if you came to apologise again for—" She'd done enough of that as far as I was concerned.

There was nothing to forgive her for, therefore no need to keep saying sorry.

She sat on the other bench. "No. I mean, I won't now. You looked like you could use a friend. Someone who understands what this crazy life is like." She plucked a half-dead rose off one of the bushes and started to pull off the petals and scatter them on the ground.

"I tried to get away from all of this. To live a normal life away from crime, violence and death. Turns out, I kinda like those things." She glanced over at me and grinned. "The moment I saw Ric again, I was done for. I think I was in denial for all those years."

"So you went back," I said. I never considered walking away. I didn't know anyone who had done it successfully, unless you counted my brother, Asher. He seemed to be living his best life away from the craziness.

"I didn't just go back, I brought my daughter with me," she said. "Ric's daughter. I wanted to keep her out of it, but it's in her blood as much as it is in mine. I'm guessing it's in yours too."

I wondered how much she knew about me. Probably not everything. If she did, she probably wouldn't ask me that question.

"I can't imagine living any other way." I watched the petals drop from her hand and flutter to the ground. "I killed a woman the other day." I told Daisy about her.

She nodded and dropped another couple of petals. "Good for you. No one messes with women like us." She closed her hand over the last few petals. "I'm?—"

"Don't say sorry," I interrupted. "You're absolutely right. No one will ever mess with me again. They'd have to kill me first."

"I wouldn't envy them if they did that. Reuben would rip them apart. I saw the way he looks at you. Like he'd go to the centre of hell for you. I've never seen him look at anyone like that. If I'm honest, I'd say I didn't think he was capable of those kinds of emotions. Men like him are— I don't know, they don't like being vulnerable." She opened her hand, turned it around and let the rest of the squashed flower fall to the grass.

"You think caring about someone makes him vulnerable?" I asked.

She glanced over and laughed once. "No, I don't. I just think that's how they see it. That if a big, bad man gives his heart to anyone, they might break it. All of my guys would have thought exactly that. Turns out, loving people makes us stronger and braver. And they get the added bonus of being with me." She grinned.

It was hard not to like her. She was strong and outspoken without needing to be nasty. Ric clearly adored her and the feeling was obviously mutual.

She was right, I needed another woman to talk to. Reuben and Gianni were attentive, but after last night things were different. Reuben and I went past friendship. Whatever this was between us, we couldn't go back to that.

With Daisy, there was no such expectation. We could talk and share things we wouldn't share with any man. Experiences women had that men didn't. Fears and vulnerabilities. The need for constant vigilance against attacks from men like Kurt.

The fact she hadn't seen me in that cage, ragged and filthy, went some way to making me feel more comfortable with her. The woman sitting here now was the only one she'd seen, otherwise she might look at me with more pity than she had. Of all the things I might want from her, pity wasn't one of them.

"I'm not sure if giving his heart to me is something Reuben plans on doing," I said.

She laughed again. "Whether or not he planned it, you already have it. I'm guessing he hasn't said anything, but it's obvious to anyone watching. He's head over heels for you."

She shook her head. "I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes. Reuben Brantley madly in love with Mina DiMarco. It's like something out of a romance novel."

Was he madly in love? It seemed like a stretch. Caring about someone and being in love weren't always the same thing.

"Gianni looks at you the same way," Daisy added. "Damon keeps his cards close to his chest, but it wouldn't surprise me if you four ended up like me and my guys."

"They're just protective," I said. "And pissed off at Kurt for stealing from them. That's all it is."

She stared at me in a way that was disturbingly like her brother. "That's not all it is. They care for you very much. I know after what you've been through, you're not ready to rush into anything. I saw that they know that too, or they'd be wearing their balls as necklaces right now. Before I leave, I'll give you my details. If they ever overstep, you're welcome to contact me and I'll fly up and deal with them." She seemed completely sincere.

"Did I mention I killed a woman?" I asked flatly.

She grinned. "So you did. I'm sure you're capable of making them eat their own nuts, but if you need help, I'm here for you. So is Ric. He'd be hating himself right now for what happened to you. We trusted Kurt and his associates and we shouldn't have."

"You should be able to trust your brother," I said. I trusted both of mine, more or less.

Okay, I trusted Asher. Dane tended to look out for his own ass. He used to, anyway. Maybe he'd changed. Maybe he hadn't.

"If Ric hadn't looked into things, I wouldn't be here. I'm grateful to him."

"Still, it's his job to make sure shit like this doesn't happen. Caleb was pissed at him. If there's anything Caleb doesn't like, it's losing money. Reuben doesn't like it either, but Caleb is worse. I think it comes with being the second oldest brother. He always has to prove himself. Or maybe he just has a really small cock." She grinned.

I actually let out a small, choking laugh at that. "I suppose that's possible. I guess I should be grateful to Caleb too, for pushing Ric to keep looking."

"Do yourself a favour and never tell Caleb that," Daisy said. "If he thinks you owe him something, he'll hold that over you. He'll want something in return. Whatever that something is, it's bound to be a thing you don't want to give."

I recoiled. "He wouldn't want?—"

She grimaced. "No, not sex. Who knows what it would be, but he wouldn't be stupid enough to try that with someone Reuben is interested in. He'd be too scared Reuben would take all his power away from him. Which is exactly what Reuben would do. No, Caleb would ask for something else. It's best you don't let him put you in that position. Trust me, I worked for Caleb for years. I see him all the time. He's always got an angle he's working. And he wants to use everyone around him to his own advantage."

"That doesn't sound different to anyone else in my life," I said. "Everyone wants something." Which led me to wonder what she wanted.

"Ain't that the truth," she said with a laugh. "Some of us just want what's best for you. Including me. I can't even imagine the things you've gone through. Hearing about it was enough to make me want to puke." Her smile had faded to an expression of regret.

"You must be a lot stronger than me, because there's no way I'd survive five minutes down there, much less five years."

"You might have found a way out," I said. I'd tried more times than I could count but failed and eventually gave up. In the end, the only hope I had was for death. Even that seemed like too much to wish for.

Daisy fixed me with a firm look. "If there was a way out of there, you would have found it. I know Kurt, he wouldn't have left even the smallest opportunity. He was always like that. He thought everything through, every scenario, every possibility. That was exactly why he got past us for so long. He's intelligent and meticulous. I'm coming to realise he might be a sociopath. The point is, not being able to get away from him is not a reflection on you or your abilities. You did what so many other people wouldn't be able to do. You survived and walked away. I don't think you have any idea how incredible that really is."

"I just…" I didn't know how to respond to that. All I did was take it one minute at a time. Count the bars around me and the lines on the ceiling. Survive when Kurt came to give me what meagre food he bothered to drop into the cage. Switch off as best I could when he used my body. Was that really so incredible?

"I did what I had to do," I said finally. "I switched off my feelings and focused on breathing and not what was happening around me. I listened to my heartbeat and counted them to calm myself. I took myself out of there, in my head." I curled and flexed the fingers of one hand as I spoke.

Daisy gave me a searching look, but nodded. "See what I mean? You're stronger than you think you are. Switching off the world around you and focusing on one thing is difficult to do without practice."

In that moment, I felt like she could see right through me. Like she fully understood me and all my darkest secrets.

I lifted my chin. That was all. Not a word of warning, no threats. Just a short, silent motion.

She lowered hers. She understood and wouldn't say anything to anyone. This was between us and us alone.

"My friends call me Daze." She held out a hand to me.

I took it without hesitation and squeezed before letting it go again. "Mine used to call me Mina Sunshine, but now I'm just Mina." I used to go by another name, but we wouldn't talk about that. Not now. Maybe not ever.