3. Claire

CHAPTER THREE

CLAIRE

A n electric, wild thrill shot through me at his words, his tone. I swallowed hard, suddenly aware of every inch of my body. I reached for my hair, fingers trembling, and slowly unbraided the silver and purple strands. Kai's eyes darkened, tracking each movement with an intensity that made my skin tingle.

"Where do you want me?" The words tumbled out before I could stop them, laden with unintended meaning. Heat flooded my cheeks as Kai's eyes snapped to his bed, then back to my face.

"On the couch," he said, his voice rough. He frowned at the clutter on the cushions and hurried to clear space. "Sorry. I, uh, haven't been the neatest lately."

My lips twitched into a teasing smile as I moved to settle into the cleared space. "Rowdy rescues, right?"

"Yeah," he said with a low chuckle, then his expression sobered. "Listen, Claire. About the drawings?—"

I waved him off, busying my shaking hands by rearranging my hair. "You're an artist. It's what you do."

Inspiration struck at will. The way the light hit this, how the shadow played off that. My sketchbook and pencil were always nearby for a reason.

A piece of me thrilled at the idea of being his muse. Of inspiring such passion and attention to detail.

Another part wondered why he never approached me. If he'd noticed the way I'd lingered too long over my tea when our paths crossed at the diner.

I settled onto the couch and began unlacing my boots, my fingers working deftly at the knots. Kai deposited the armful of clutter onto his desk with a muted clatter. The warmth from the crackling fire seeped into my damp jeans, gradually chasing away the chill from my earlier spill in the snow.

Then he was back in front of me, towering over where I sat. I struggled to swallow as my mouth went dry. My heart hammered in my chest. His gaze seemed to pin me in place, commanding and gentle and dangerous.

"Like this?" I stretched out on my side, propping my head on my fist and draping an arm over my torso. My voice came out breathier than I intended.

Kai's eyes darkened, his jaw clenching as he reached for his sketchpad and pencil. He licked his lips, then nodded. "Perfect."

He dragged a chair across from the couch, then sank down, his eyes never leaving mine. His grip tightened on the pencil. For a moment, he froze, a war of emotions playing out across his face. Then he seemed to come to a decision. He tore his gaze away, turning his attention to the blank page.

For a heartbeat, nothing happened. I watched as he shifted in his seat, shoulders hunching. His hand flexed. Then he seemed to master himself and set to work, his hand moving furiously across the paper.

The seconds stretched into minutes. The fire crackled merrily, casting dancing shadows around the loft. My eyes traced the cracks in the walls, the gouges in the plaster. The tension in Kai's shoulders, and the way his hair kept falling into his face.

"Tell me about your holidays growing up," Kai said, his eyes flicking between me and his sketchpad. "Traditions and all that."

I shifted, a sudden wave of homesickness for a childhood I never had washing over me. "Quiet, mostly. Tense. My parents couldn't stand to be in the same room for more than a minute without arguing. Then after the divorce, Dad was busy with his replacement family and Mom with her latest fling."

He frowned, but I shook my head. I didn't want his pity.

"Grandpa made things better." I smiled at the memories, letting them wash away the lingering hurt. "He was always full of stories and laughs, and he never failed to fly me and my brother, Derek, out for winter break. Gingerbread houses and tacky sweaters and drinking cocoa while watching terrible movies."

"He sounds amazing," Kai said softly, his pencil pausing for him to flex his hand.

"He was." I'd give anything for just one more holiday with him. He'd gotten me through my parents' split, and all the trouble with Derek that followed.

I glanced around the sparse loft. No tinsel here. No twinkling lights or baubles. Just bare walls and cluttered corners. Not that I could judge, with the double-fisting Santa balanced atop all of Grandpa's boxed decorations.

Mine, now.

"What about you?" I asked through the wave of sadness. "Any decorating plans?"

His shoulders tensed. "Not really my thing."

The fire crackled, filling the silence. I watched the flames dance, casting flickering shadows across Kai's face. His jaw clenched, eyes dark with... something. Desire? Pain?

"Maddy and I," he started, then swallowed hard. "When we were kids, the holidays were special. But she's ma—married now, a baby on the way..."

He trailed off, his hand moving furiously across the paper as if he could scribble out the pain.

"Things change," I finished for him. "People change."

Kai's eyes met mine, a flash of understanding passing between us. "Your brother?"

I nodded, a lump forming in my throat. "Derek made his choices. I can't keep trying to save someone who doesn't want to be saved."

And who didn't care what damage he left in his wake.

Kai went still, save for flexing his hand. He didn't lift his head, but I still got a front row show to the shadows that passed over his face, there and gone in an instant. Guilt. Regret.

He cleared his throat. "Can you shift a bit? Maybe sit up?"

I nodded, pushing myself upright. The couch creaked beneath me as I adjusted, hyper-aware of Kai's gaze. My skin prickled with goosebumps that had nothing to do with the cold.

"Like this?" I asked, tucking one leg under me.

He shook his head, standing. "Almost. Just..." He approached, hesitating before reaching out. "May I?"

My breath caught. I managed a nod.

Kai's touch was featherlight as he guided my chin, angling my face. His fingers trailed down my neck, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. He paused at my shoulder, gently turning me.

"There," he murmured, his eyes flicking to mine. "Don't move."

My heart threatened to pound out of my chest. Heat flooded my face, my core. My eyes darted to his mouth, wondering. Wanting.

But I held perfectly still, trapped by his stare. My breathing sounded loud to my ears. I felt exposed, pinned in place by his eyes. Vulnerable.

Eager.

Then his fingers brushed my hair aside, exposing the nape of my neck. A sharp intake of breath. "What's this?"

I knew exactly what he'd found. The tiny bat tattoo, dangling upside down behind my ear. One of my many tattoos, but that one always felt like a surprise for someone to discover. The sheer closeness needed to see it, touch it...

"My good luck charm," I answered, trying for casual.

"Did it work?" His fingers returned, tracing the shape. My breath hitched.

I turned my head slightly, meeting the heated brown of his eyes. "I think so. I'm alive, aren't I?"

He chuckled, the sound vibrating through my body. Then, with gentle firmness, he used a finger to tilt my chin back to its original position. "Be still."

The command sent a shiver through me. I felt him retreat, but every nerve ending remained aware of his presence. I felt him everywhere, and his proximity lit me up inside.

Kai returned to his seat, the chair creaking under his weight. I held my pose, every muscle taut with anticipation. The scratch of pencil on paper filled the air, punctuated by the crackling fire and our uneven breaths.

My skin tingled where he'd touched me. The ghost of his fingers lingered on my neck, my chin. I fought the urge to shiver, to break the stillness he'd crafted.

A sharp intake of breath broke the spell. Kai's hand spasmed, the sketchbook tumbling from his grip. It hit the floor with a dull thud.

"Shit," he muttered, flexing his fingers.

I lurched forward, concern overriding the charged atmosphere. "Are you okay?"

He nodded, but the tightness around his eyes betrayed him. "It's fine. Just a cramp."

"Bullshit." The word slipped out before I could stop it. I softened my tone. "You should stretch it out."

Kai's jaw clenched. "I said it's fine."

I raised an eyebrow, channeling my inner Claire-doesn't-take-shit energy. "And I say it's not. Give it here."

For a moment, I thought he'd refuse. Then his shoulders sagged, and he pushed to his feet, closing the distance between us. He stood for a moment, as if reconsidering, before sinking down on the couch beside me.

I reached for him, taking his hand and drawing it into my lap. I cradled it between my hands, thumbs pressing into his palm. I was dimly aware of Kai's breath, fast and shallow. The warmth of his arm against mine, the heat of his body bleeding through the layers of clothing.

But I stayed focused on my task. I worked my thumbs into his skin, kneading carefully and loosening the tightness in his wrist and forearm. A groan escaped him, and he closed his eyes.

"There?" I asked softly, kneading harder. Fucking hell, what that noise did to me.

He nodded, his Adam's apple bobbing. "I've been drawing too much."

"I'll say." I raised an eyebrow and teased, "Something catch your eye?"

He cracked an eye open, one corner of his mouth twitching up. "Something like that."

I fell silent again, working until his hand relaxed. So close, I could see the faint scars crisscrossing his hand. They were harder to spot on his palm, but still there. Still stiff. Still painful.

"What happened here?" I asked, tracing one of the marks. "I know you said it's old…"

Kai tensed. I looked up, catching the guilt and agitation warring in his eyes. He tried to pull away, but I held firm.

He swallowed hard, his gaze dropping to our joined hands. For a split second, I could have sworn his eyes flashed an unnatural, vivid green. I blinked, startled, but when I looked again, they were their usual warm brown and filled with so much regret.

"I fucked up," he finally said, his voice low and raw. "Made some stupid choices. Got into some trouble. This..." He flexed his hand in mine. "This was the least of what I deserved."

The pain and implication in his voice tore at my heart. Someone did this to him? It wasn't some tragic accident? I gentled my touch, my thumbs making soothing circles on his skin. "No one deserves this, Kai."

"You wouldn't say that if you knew I nearly got my sister hurt and the sacrifices she's had to make because of my mistakes." He met my eyes for a swift second before squeezing his lids closed. "I deserve every bit of the pain."

I felt a pang in my chest, recognizing the self-loathing in Kai's voice. It was all too familiar—I'd heard it countless times from my brother during his brief periods of sobriety. But Derek had always chosen to run from his mistakes, spiraling further into addiction.

Kai was here. Dealing with his sister's rescue mishaps, sure, but here. Not running.

"We all make mistakes," I told him, my hands stilling on his. "What matters is what we do after."

He met my gaze, his eyes searching mine. "I don't know how to make it up to her," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. "I don't even know where to begin."

The raw determination in his voice struck a chord within me. It was everything I'd ever wanted to hear from Derek, everything I'd hoped for and never received. Not after my things went missing. Not after he took off with Grandpa's credit card. Hours and hour spent in darkness and terror went entirely unacknowledged.

Softly, I said, "You're here. That's admirable."

His eyes snapped to mine, searching. "Is it? Or is it selfish? Maybe I should just leave, let her have a fresh start without my baggage weighing her down."

"Running away isn't the answer. Trust me, I know." I shook my head to clear the memories of Derek and his dealer's demands. "Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is stay and face your mistakes."

Kai's hand tightened around mine. "Even if it might hurt the people you care about?"

"Especially then," I said. "It's easy to run. It's hard to face the consequences of your actions. To put in the work to be better and make amends."

He nodded slowly, his thumb tracing circles on the back of my hand. The touch sent shivers up my arm.

"Thank you," he murmured. Our eyes locked, and the sheer intensity of emotion staring back surprised me. His hand tightened on mine, almost possessive. "Probably not what you had in mind for your evening."

The note of laughter in his voice sent butterflies winging through my stomach. I shook my head, smiling. "What's the point of being snowed in if not to share unexpected confessions?"

He grinned, eyes glittering. "So, it wasn't my shining personality and sparkling conversation?"

"I was instantly drawn to the warmth of your jacket," I deadpanned, gesturing at the garment piled on the floor. "You clearly had the superior outerwear for an impromptu visit."

He laughed, and the sound set off a whole swarm of butterflies in my belly. I wanted to make him laugh more. Smile more. Be more.

I wanted to taste it.

Kai must have had the same thought, because his grin turned wicked as his eyes dropped to my lips. I leaned in, intoxicated by the nearness of him. I could smell the faint hint of cologne—spicy and woodsy—and his own unique scent, like pine needles and cool night air.

He released my hands and lifted his to my face, cradling my cheeks with calloused palms. His touch sparked an electric current across my skin. His breath ghosted over my lips a fraction of a second before they met.

Desire surged through me, hot and needy. Kai's tongue pressed against mine, exploring the inside of my mouth. A low moan slipped free, and I melted into him, losing myself in his kiss.

I moved closer, practically crawling into his lap. My knees straddled his legs, my hands diving into his hair as I kissed him fiercely. He growled into my mouth, his hands sliding to my hips. I gasped as he gripped me harder, pulling me forward to grind against the already hard ridge of his cock.

I tugged at his hair, drawing a delicious moan from his throat. A wild, primal pleasure raced through me, knowing I'd drawn that sound from him. Knowing I had power over this big, powerful man.

Suddenly, Kai's body went rigid. He grasped my shoulders and practically threw me off his lap, scrambling backward until he hit the far wall. His eyes were wide with panic, his chest heaving.

"Kai?" I gasped, my heart racing. "What's wrong?"

He didn't answer. Instead, he doubled over, a strangled groan escaping his throat. I watched in horror as his body contorted, bones cracking and reshaping beneath his skin. His clothes tore away as thick, dark fur sprouted across his body.

Fur. Dark fur. The same dark fur as the stray dog I'd been trying to help since I moved to town.

Only, this was no dog.

A massive wolf crouched where Kai had stood moments before.

Not real. Not real. This couldn't be real.

But as the wolf's green eyes locked onto mine, I knew this was no figment of my imagination. This was real. And I needed to get the fuck out of there.

I lunged for my jacket and boots. My attention snapped to the door, gauging the distance. If I could just make it outside...

As if reading my thoughts, the wolf—Kai—moved with lightning speed, positioning himself between me and the exit. He lowered his head, a low growl rumbling in his chest.

I froze, my heart pounding so hard I thought it might burst from my chest. The wolf took a step toward me and I stumbled backward, my legs hitting the couch. Only then did he stop growling.

"Kai," I whispered, my voice trembling. "Please..."

The wolf's ears twitched at the sound of his name, but he didn't back down. As we stared at each other, human and beast, I realized with growing dread that I wasn't going anywhere.